Blitzkrieg of Love
by sydney563
Summary: Lauren is a award winning film director, making her masterpiece. She reluctantly casts Bo as her lead, and it changes both of their lives. This was an original story i started, but moved it to a ff. It's got stuff in it, romance, things, words. Read it and find out!
1. Chapter 1

N: this was a original story i had started and abandoned due to lack of inspiration. So i'm throwing it over here to fiddle with it as an ongoing ff. Don't expect rapid updates as i am still working on other books and trying to survive life in general. I will be slow to update as i'm still recovering on many levels from a horrible car accident, needless to say my mind and body will pull me away from writing as i get better. That and the books are taking top priority, this story will be the break i take to just not think about the complex plotlines of the two books. Anyways, its xmas time and i have books for sale on amazon! Get a few for yourself, friends, family, that one co-worker you somewhat like, but just go and look for Sydney Gibson on amazon and click add to cart! Anyways, read on and enjoy!

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Chapter 1

The new house was still empty. Nothing had arrived yet aside from the few boxes in the master bedroom and random kitchen things dropped off by my mother yesterday before I landed late. Even empty, the house still felt cozy but spacious. The old maple floors and oak trim made the Tudor house feel like a warm hug, a warm much needed hug.

The rental house sat on the outskirts of Nottingham, England. A choice made by my mother and I when the studio greenlit this next project. Figuring it was cheaper to rent a house than find a small apartment near the sound stage. Granted I was still three to four months away from starting any principal photography, I still wanted the escape from the west coast and the overbearing media thrusting me back into the spotlight as rumors leaked about the next great movie I was to make after a year-long hiatus. All of it combining into a strange overwhelming pressure that drove me across the Atlantic and away from the white noise of living in Hollywood.

Now standing in the library, bare feet on the cool wooden floor, I peered out the window onto the large green back yard. It was early spring in England and everything was in varying shades of green. A vast improvement on the concrete jungle of Los Angeles I was used to where everything was neon and shades of grey.

Wearing the same baggy and holey jeans I wore on the plane, topped with a faded black t-shirt with my one of my favorite bands logo faded in the center, I looked nothing like the recycled photos still being used from last year's Academy Awards. All primped out in a designer dress, designer makeup and my long blonde hair in a snazzy up do. That woman still graced the covers of beauty magazines, or the trade papers when the rumors started but I remained in the shadows. Hiding from the camera, preferring to stand behind it and maintain some form of privacy.

Hearing the quick footsteps coming from the front entrance, I turned away from the large empty bookshelves I stood next to, the sunlight catching in bursts over my short, bleach blonde hair. My newest assistant appeared in the doorway, grinning at me. A tall, English girl with strawberry blonde hair and green eyes, Elizabeth "Effy" Winchester, had been "assigned" to me by the studio. I didn't refute her coming on board as my production and personal assistant after seeing her extensive resume, but I was still feeling her out after a month of meeting one another.

"Excuse me, Ms. Lewis, the first of your appointments has arrived." Effy's grin dropped to a genuine smile, the girl was always smiling, and held out the thin folders I knew held head shots, resumes and carefully written bios. I nodded slowly, taking the folders from her, "Did you set them up in the den?"

"Yes ma'am. I have also asked them to bring the audition tapes from the L.A casting call."

I smiled lightly, Effy was most certainly efficient and always seemed to know what I wanted before I asked for it. "Thank you." I took in a slow breath, "Who do we have up first?"

Effy reached for the thin folder on top of the stack in my hand, flicking the cover open she pointed at the head shot of a young woman staring up at me in a professional yet causal pose. I glossed over the image and flipped it to read the quick details of the actress, Effy continued on as we walked down the hallway to the den, "Rose Edwards. Twenty three, blonde soap star on NYC 5th Avenue."

I turned the photograph over, glaring at the cookie cutter blonde hair and blue eyed girl grinning a full mouth of bright white veneers. I groaned when I recognized who she was and closed the file, cutting off Effy reciting the girl's multiple talents, "No." Handing the file back to her.

Effy took it slowly, "She came recommended by the studio. One daytime Emmy, some stage experience in college."

I shook my head, "No. It's not her."

Effy nodded, "I understand Ms. Lewis, but at least meet the girl. She has been quite eager since she arrived, and the studio did pay for her travel expenses."

I ran my hand over my short hair, still getting used to the lack of length, I mumbled, "Fine. But it's not her." I knew why Effy had brought up the travel expenses. The studio would not be happy if I shoved the girl they paid to see me out the door without so much as a hello. I had to still play the game sometimes even when I really didn't have to.

Effy, pushed the door to the den open, holding it for me to walk through. She fell in step behind me, "Good morning, Ms. Edwards." The blonde girl sitting and fidgeting in the large leather chair, sat up straight and I watched as her eyes widened when they settled on me. "I would like to introduce you to Ms. Lauren Lewis."

I walked over to the girl and put on my best manners, smiling like I had learned to on the red carpet and shake her hand. I moved to sit on a small couch across from the girl, curling my legs underneath my leg, I accepted her folder once again from Effy. Clearing my throat, I opened the front page and pretended that I was looking at it for the first time, "So, Rose, tell me what would you bring to the role of Annie?" I glanced up at the girl, watching the gears grind in her head as she tried to come up with the perfectly worded response to why she should get the lead role in my next movie.

I kept the smile on my face as I zoned out while Rose recycled the same speech I had heard a hundred times already. Fake, forced, and nowhere near the honesty I was looking for. There was a gaping lack of the raw talent I was looking for. Rose Edwards was definitely a no.

* * *

Two hours, and five women later I was bored out of my mind.

All of the women had acting skills ranging from Julliard trained actors to waitresses who had flirted with the right Executive Producer at lunch in a diner in Nowheresville, USA. None of them fit what I was looking for in the female lead of my movie. None of them embodied Boliese "Annie" Booth. Tough as nails Army nurse serving during the Blitzkrieg years of World War Two.

I did end up casting one of the women in the supporting role of Annie's best friend Bernadette, but the rest I dismissed politely after hearing their rants and raves over how amazing I would be to work with.

When the last girl finally left, I let out an exasperated sigh, turning to Effy, "The next round, can you have their bios forwarded to me by dinner? I need to get moving on casting the leads. Rehearsals are due to start sooner than I would like." I leaned forward on the couch, reaching for the bottle of cherry coke I had set on the table, dropping my legs out from underneath me to stretch them, "Also, kindly tell them all I don't need to have my own resume repeated back to me."

Effy chuckled as she scribbled in her notebook, "You didn't enjoy hearing, Oh Ms. Lewis, two-time Academy Award winning director, once for original screenplay and that everything and anything you touch turns to gold?"

I rolled my eyes, standing up to move out of the den, "I will be upstairs working on unpacking the rest of the boxes."

Effy smiled as she hustled out of the den, promising me she would be back by dinner time with the next round of actresses vying for me to pick them.

I strolled through the house, swinging my coke bottle from my fingertips. Reflecting on how much my life had shifted in the last three years. Yes, I was Lauren Lewis, the most popular and sought after film director in Hollywood right now, it wasn't my ego speaking for me, it was the hard facts the media had thrown across all the headlines year after year. I had been thrust to the top tier of names alongside Spielberg, Scorsese, Ridley Scott, Clint Eastwood, etc. All male directors who respected me as much as I respected them.

I had also become Hollywood's princess of the media outlets. Something that bothered me from day one and finally pushed me into hiding over the last year to re-group before starting my next film. I had lost myself in the bright lights and desperately needed to find Lauren again. The Lauren who was almost a police officer in her hometown of Boston. The Lauren who was a huge science fiction nerd who always wrote stories or screenplays as a hobby and got lucky when the studio executive at Spielberg's production company stumbled across my blog. Becoming intrigued by one of my female homicide detective stories and optioned for me to turn it into a screenplay.

I was hired and after winning my first academy award and learning the business, the director of that film took notice of my natural talent with a camera and had me work with him on his next film. I was credited as assistant director on that film and was soon given the go ahead to direct one of my own film screenplays on a tiny budget. I took it without hesitation and "Cold Water's Edge." won me my second Academy award for Direction. I was shocked at the idea my silly, sappy love story of two lovers separated by time would have struck such a chord with anyone at all. But it did and I was soon set into my place as Hollywood royalty. A strange place for a nerd like me to end up in after less than two years of getting my foot in the door.

My second film, "Heavenly Redemption." a science fiction, murder mystery, romance movie broke box office records and swept the Academy Awards, effectively sealing my fate and concreting my place with the greats. I had more money coming my way from the royalties from the film, expansive amount of fame and all the freedom I could ever dream of, and as much as I loved it, I hated it.

I was always followed, questioned, and photographed. My past all the way from high school to right before I signed my first contract was pasted all over the tabloids. Everyone who called themselves a journalist commented on how I was still a little gangly from my days working at the local pizza place in my hometown. That no amount of makeup could really make me more glamorous and up to the standards glitzy fame demanded of one in their world.

It all became overbearing and frustrating, taking the shine off of being heralded as a true artist and a new film visionary. Hard to believe anything while being called plump and plain every other day in front of the world. It changed me and I became very hard, very private and known to be a hard working director that didn't fool around when my time was wasted. I was fearfully respected and bordered on being kind like Spielberg and a hard ass like Kubrick. I didn't care, I knew my crew loved me because I treated them with respect and only asked for them to give me their best. The actors I worked with would never spout a negative word about me, I had made many of their careers while making mine and it was a strange dedicated loyalty. Yes, the media thought I was a frigid bitch, but it helped maintain my privacy and I didn't care what people thought of me.

It was this opinion and being overworked from the last film that I disappeared a month after my last Academy Award win. I claimed it was to work on my next script, which was partially true, but I wanted to find the happiness in myself outside of the bright lights and big city. I began working out, traveling, falling in and out of what I thought was true love with various women I met in my travels. I became different and more confident in who I was, changing my inside it my outside and finding balance. I did eventually finish the script in between long holidays in Italy and France. A love story I had started writing right before I left Boston. Set in World War two, the main character was an American Army nurse and the film followed her epic search for love in the middle of a world at war. It would start with her falling for a dashing RAF flyboy and how he is everything she thinks she wants and needs, but then begins to develop to feelings for the quiet British female doctor she works side by side with every day at the same hospital in war torn London.

The script was given a green light the moment I set it down on the producers' desk. There was no hesitation by the studio executive in regards to the lesbian relationship theme, saying that it was time these stories were brought to the mainstream audience. Oddly enough, the studio told me that they were already expecting a film like this from me since I had been shoved out of the closet as soon as my face hit the tabloids.

That was another thing the tabloids ruined for me, my relationship. I had a girlfriend at the time I was starting to climb the ladder to fame. We lived together in my tiny apartment in Los Angeles and I had to quickly own up to the tabloids and correct their lies with my blunt truths as they shoved cameras down my throat. Soon my sexuality was forgotten as my work spoke for myself. It also helped that I continued to live privately and what would resemble as normal. I didn't party, I didn't date around, and I didn't spend my money on crazy things. I worked religiously and only spent my money on a new house with a nice sedan in the driveway. I literally bored the paparazzi that hid in front of my garbage cans so much, they moved on after a week.

Now here I was, thirty four years old, living the perfect dream. Single, rich, talented and yet I felt the gap of never having ever really been in love. Like the grand sweeping love I was famous for writing about. Something that shocked interviewers considering I had written some of the most incredible romance stories to ever grace film and gave the world hope love was real and worth fighting for. And yet, I had never experienced it the way I had my characters experience it.

Pushing the door open to my massive bedroom, I chuckled to myself, love was something I had given up on a long time ago. Gave up after my Boston girlfriend who moved to L.A with me, left me for the lead actor in my second movie. She married him six months after my second Academy Award win. Last I read, they now lived in Santa Barbara, expecting their second child.

So, yes, I gave up on love after that. Realizing I could only write what I wanted and accept never having it.

I let out a soft sigh, setting my cherry coke down, I moved to the stack of boxes filled with books. I busied my mind and hands with unpacking my collection of science fiction and history books. Silently hoping the next group of actresses Effy handed me would inspire something in me. That one of them would perfectly embody Annie, or come close to the one woman I had initially written the role for so many years ago. I wanted one of them to inspire me to hire one of them and get back to work like I so very much needed to.

* * *

XXXXXXX

The next two groups of actresses did nothing to inspire me. Soap stars, stage stars, the hottest in Hollywood, down to the local girl just hired by the studio who had a ton of talent. Every of them sat one by one in my den and read over lines, then told me that this was a dream role in a dream job.

All of them fell flat.

By the end of the week I was ready to give up and possibly look at re-casting the lead actress as a lead actor. Moving away from the original theme I had started with and move it towards a dashing man chasing the beautiful doctor. It was frustrating and I was losing patience and interest in even bothering with the last round of actresses Effy had arranged for me to see.

I found Effy in the den, primly dressed in her usual skirt and button down. I soon realized that it didn't matter what time of the day it was, Effy was always the consummate professional and would not bend even if I told her she could wear sweatpants to work. I shuffled in the room, having dressed in ragged jeans and a t-shirt after getting out the shower, I was far from in a good mood. I had been up too late the night before dealing with timelines, production budgets, and studio needs that compounded my frustrations.

I took the offered cold bottle of cherry coke from Effy and flopped onto the leather couch next to her.

She shook her head, smiling at me, "Breakfast of champions, I see."

I smiled, "I'd need two doughnuts to make that a true statement." I opened the bottle, taking a large sip, "I would drink coffee, but I hate it and mornings." Setting the coke off to the side I turned to the folders Effy was flipping through, taking notes. "Who do we have today?"

Effy sat back and away from her notes, "We have four girls. Evelyn Martin, indie film star. Katey Johnson, the next big up and comer. Star of that horrible romantic comedy that released last weekend. Reese Somerset, singer turned actress and lastly, Bo Dennis. Washed up cult TV star whose only been in one movie in the last seven years."

I had been half listening to the names until the last one snatched my attention. I turned to Effy, "Wait, Bo Dennis? SciFi cult star from the show, Worlds Unknown?" I pointed at the file in Effy's hand, she nodded as she handed it over to me, "The one and only, Ms. Lewis."

I felt my jaw twitch when I set my eyes on the head shot in the file. It was an older head shot of Bo Dennis, grinning her million dollar grin as she peered up at me. It was a promotional shot from the show and I knew it well. It was the same one that hung up above my writing desk for years after I had it autographed. Now it was shoved in a box deep in the basement of my parent's basement back in Boston.

I stared at the chocolate rich eyes of Bo, zoning out into strange memories when Effy's voice brought me back to the moment, using my first name, "Lauren? Is there something wrong?"

I shook my head slowly, setting the folder down on the table, "No, not at all." The old memories of a day where embarrassment ruled and fueled my drive to be who I was now, surfacing faster than I could swallow them down. I started to chew on my bottom lip when Effy spoke again, "Is there something wrong with Ms. Dennis' resume?"

I laughed lightly, looking up at Effy, thinking back on the first and last time I had met Bo Dennis, "She's actually perfect, Effy. Perfect because I wrote this movie for her. And completely wrong at the same time, because I wrote this movie for her." I grabbed my bottle of coke, squeezing the plastic hard, "Then I found out how big of a self-absorbed bitch she was."

The look on Effy's face told me she knew there was a story behind my mild outburst, once she was failing to hide how eager she was to hear it. I leaned back, sighing hard and rolling my eyes, about to indulge my new assistant on a story I had kept tucked away for years. "It was about seven years ago when I met Bo Dennis at one of those SciFi comic book convention things."

 _7 years ago-_

 _I had been standing in line for at least three hours. Waiting for the doors to the convention center to open and let in the masses of comic book and science fiction geeks in to swarm around their heroes. I was in my true element, surrounded by nerds, geeks and the world of fantasy. I had been so excited to go to this event for months and didn't even care when my girlfriend bailed on me at the last minute. It would probably be for the better not to have her standing next to me as I lost my cool in front of my favorite TV show actress. Bo Dennis, the star of World's Unknown and the star of one the biggest crushes I had ever had._

 _I was so focused on my task of meeting her and handing over the screenplay I had written for her, that I barely interacted with the other fans in line with me. Chatting about this seasons story line and what next big movie Bo was set to star in. I could only stand ridged, tapping my bag with the screenplay in it, and recite over and over my planned speech to the gorgeous woman. I couldn't stop looking at the silly picture I had printed out for her to sign, a bold promo shot from last season. Bo standing with authority and sass with her dark brown hair, bold bright brown eyes and a smirk that made everyone swoon. She was incredible, strong and I would give my left leg to get any of my screenplays into her hands._

 _The line moved steadily and finally I was inches away from her, losing my cool and sweating profusely, I set the picture down and went to dig in my bag for the screenplay._

 _"Hi, what's your name?"_

 _I felt my breath catch, hearing her voice and hearing it right in front of me. I bit my bottom lip trying to keep myself in check, "Lauren." I pushed the picture in front of Bo, having a hell of time not staring at her and how elegantly stunning she was in person. "I'm a big fan of yours."_

 _Bo chuckled, nodding as she looked at the picture, "I'm glad to hear that, do you want me to sign this to you?"_

 _I nodded, clutching to the screenplay, "Please. I loved you in last season, the way you took Samara to new levels, it was incredible to watch." I glanced down at the thick script in my hands, feeling my nerves rise to ridiculous levels. "It…um…actually inspired me to write a screenplay. A story that I think you'd like and that you'd be great as the lead."_

 _Bo finished scribbling her name, looking up at me with a soft smile, "Thank you, and a screenplay?"_

 _I nodded, setting the thick wad of paper I technically stole from my crappy pizza joint job, "It's a love story set in World War two." I flipped open the first page where I had written a quick synopsis. "I kind of fleshed it all out in this first page, hoping it would grab your attention before having to read tons of pages of dialogue and camera movements."_

 _Bo's smile grew a bit as she picked it up, "Oh wow, are you a film student?"_

 _I shook my head, "No, I work at a pizza place, I just write in my spare time." I found my nerves settling as Bo read through the first few pages, her brow moving in deep interest. "I'm not asking for you to support it, just read it and tell me what you think? I have my email address in the back." I rolled my eyes, I sounded like a legit super creep fan saying that last part._

 _The brunette grinned, setting the screenplay on top of her bag, "I will take a look at it tonight, and if I like it. I'll see what I can do, Lauren. I'm always looking for new projects." She stood up, reaching out to shake my hand as she held out the signed picture, "It was great to meet you, Lauren, I hope you come to the panel later."_

 _I grinned, taking her hand and feeling my heart race at how warm she was, how kind and genuine she seemed. A rarity I had found in most actors after years of going to cons, screenings or basically running into them on the streets when a movie came to town. "Thank you, and yes I'll be at that panel."_

 _I went to say something else when a handler appeared, ushering Bo off to take a break. She waved at me as she disappeared through the curtain, leaving me incredibly excited and my crush bordering on overwhelming._

Effy chuckled, "That sounds quite a delightful experience. Meeting your celebrity crush."

I rolled my eyes, leaning my head against the leather couch, "It was delightful. I knew I had at make three or so minutes to talk to her before I was moved on, but yes that part was delightful." I sighed, "Then I went to the panel early to get a seat."

Effy raised her eyebrow at me, "I feel this is where the story takes a devious turn."

I chuckled, tipping my head back down, "Yes, to keep it short, I snuck around the corner to go to the bathroom and happened across an open door. It was a green room where they were holding Bo and the other cast members of the show. Needless to say, I poked my head in and watched her hold up my screenplay and throw it in a trash can, laughing with the rest of the cast. Muttering how she was tired of stupid fans shoving their next great film in her face, then went on to curse these public appearances and how they did nothing but make her want to take day long hot showers from all the gross fan hugs. The woman went on to say how she was above such things since she had just signed a contract for that science fiction movie she did that destroyed her career."

I shrugged, "I was shocked and my entire world was smashed to pieces. My number one inspiration had basically thrown me to the side like I was nothing more than dollar signs for her. I threw the script out and buried it in my hard drive until a year ago. She did however motivate me in anger, and I worked harder to prove her and the others wrong."

Effy glanced at the thick script sitting next to the bottle of cherry coke, "But this script is brilliant, it's going to be a veritable work of art when you're done."

I smiled softly, "It was a thorn in my side, a constant reminder of how fame ruins people and makes them fake." I tapped the top of the script, "I hated this thing for a very long time, until I opened it up and decided that I wasn't going to let a washed up actress drive me away from a project that was written from the heart."

I motioned to the picture of Bo Dennis staring up at the ceiling, "She's completely perfect for the role, but I don't think I can give it to her." I sighed, "She was the first of many stuck up humans in my life that continued to shove me down a few rungs as I climbed higher and higher."

"So, you're going to be mildly vengeful and not give her the role?" Effy glanced at me with a smirk, "Seems to me that you've won more than any idea of revenge you've planned could."

I raised an eyebrow at the younger girl, "Why must you talk sense into a moment of desired emotional retribution?"

Effy grinned, "Isn't that what production assistants are for?"

I laughed, shaking my head, "Fair enough. But we see her last." I picked up Evelyn's resume, "Let's start here, I am interested in hearing this one's interpretation of what Annie should be like."

Effy stood up, "I shall bring her in. Is there anything you'd like?"

I pointed at the half empty bottle of Cherry Coke, "Another one of these please and you to gently remind Evelyn to lay off the admiration speech."

"Of course." Effy walked out of the den, her heels clicking evenly on the wooden floors.

I sat back in the chair, my eyes drifting to the picture of Bo, all of my emotions from seven years ago, boiling up. I was not looking forward to meeting this woman again, especially in an arena where the tables were slightly turned and I could be brutally honest.

* * *

A half hour later, Evelyn had flubbed the lines, unable to say tracheotomy without giggling. Katey went a little too hard on the macho aspect of Annie, completely failing to find the softness that was the Army nurse. And Rose, well Rose was an utter failure. She choked over the lines and many times suggested that I move the love interest to a male, not a female.

As Effy escorted Rose back out of the house, I covered my face with my hands, leaning forward. These auditions were going to drive me up the fricking wall, if they continued this way I would have to call the studio and ask them to cast a wider net and that was the last thing I wanted to do. Open casting calls were the worst even if I could find the next great actor in a field of unknowns.

"This way, Ms. Dennis. I apologize that it's taken us a bit to see you." Effy's voice was pleasant and signaled me to recover my composure.

I sucked in a breath and reached for Bo's head shot, pretending to study the facts on the back. I did notice that the woman was only one year older than me, which intrigued me. She was only a year older than me when I stood in front of her, handing over a script.

"Ms. Lewis?"

I drew my eyes up, smiling as I looked at Effy, "Yes?"

She grinned, motioning to the woman standing next to her, "I would like to introduce Bo Dennis."

I held my smile as I shifted to look at the woman. She looked far different than her head shot and from the last time I saw her. Her hair was a darker brown and not the bold black color from the days on the show and done up in a very vintage style. Bo was smiling softly, her brown eyes sparkling with hope and she stood politely next to Effy, wearing a pair of dark green dress pants and a light beige top that fit the era of the forties.

I half smiled, shaking my head. This woman was the only of the group that had bothered to attempt to dress as the character might. Granted it was a very old audition tactic, but I could appreciate it. It showed care and genuine interest in the character. I stood up from the chair, reaching my hand out to shake hers, "Afternoon Ms. Dennis."

Bo grinned softly, and it lit up the entire room. I clenched my jaw, feeling all those stupid crush feelings rush back. I couldn't refute that the woman was gorgeous and had grown even more elegant over the years. Overall the woman was still stunning and made my heart skip a little like it did when I first stood this close to her.

"Please call me Bo, and thank you for seeing me." She smoothed out her shirt, fidgeting from nerves.

I often didn't notice when people were nervous in front of me, I had grown used to it even if I didn't quite understand why anyone would be nervous to meet me. I was still a nerd at heart that had worked really hard to get where I was. I waved to the couch across from the chair I had been sitting in, "Please have a seat and we will get started." I held up her head shot and resume, "Do you have an updated copy of this? It looks like the head shot is a few years old."

I watched as a slight blush covered her cheeks, "I gave your assistant an updated resume, but not a head shot. I haven't felt the need to get new ones down. I haven't done much work over the last few years to warrant it." Bo sat down on the couch slowly, her nervousness becoming almost painful for me to bear.

I glanced at Effy handing over the updated resume, she gave me a humorous look that almost told me to be nice. I smiled, nodding yes before turning my attention to the resume. Bo was right about her lack of work. Her resume highlight was World's Unknown and that terrible movie she did, then it dropped off to a few guest appearances on top network shows, a few three line parts in movies and the last thing was an airline commercial I had seen once on the inflight screens on said airline.

I read over everything slowly, debating if I wanted to be a hard ass like I had been or take pity on the woman like my lingering crush was telling me to do. I kept my head down, "I'm assuming you read the pages your agent sent to you?"

"Yes, I did." Bo let out a slow breath, "This script is amazing, the character of Annie is unlike anything I've ever read before. She's strong, independent and unique for that time." She paused, looking down at her hands, "I should admit that I was shocked when your production office sent the script to me. I know I've drifted off into the shadows of irrelevance."

I looked up at her, cocking an eyebrow. "Are you trying to cater to my sense of pity?" I had been down this road a million times with actors. All of them pulling out their acting abilities in the audition, hoping I would bite and fall for the pity of a hard working actor just wanting their break.

Bo shot her head up, her brown eyes locking on me as she shook her head, "Oh no, Ms. Lewis, not at all. I'm very aware that my fifteen minutes were up a few years ago." She let out a sigh, looking at Effy and then back at me, "I've made mistakes in my choices. I had an ego that came from the instant fame of being a star of a hit TV show." She paused, looking back at her hands, "I'm not searching for pity."

I smirked when Effy gave me a dirty look. I moved to set the head shot down, "Okay then, tell me why you think you're the fit for Annie before I have you do a read through with Effy here."

Bo nodded, scooting to the edge of the couch, "I can't really explain it, I just feel like reading the script, that Annie was written for me." She smiled softly, "I mean I know that's not the truth, but there's something in her character that I can relate to, and I think that I can take that feeling and run with it. Bring life to the pages and story you've created." She looked at the huge script next to her head shot, "It's a story I can relate to, a messy love triangle where you're unsure where to take your heart. Annie is someone I wish I could be in so many ways."

I stared at the brunette, pouring out honesty that I had not seen in a very long time. I was also surprised that she felt the script was written for her, which it was, but it still surprised me that she connected with the character on that level. I sat in silence for a moment, thinking and hating that Bo was truly the only person that could play Annie, but I didn't want to hand it over to her. I wanted the woman to work for it, sweat over it and maybe it was my own form of revenge, I wasn't going to bend to the beautiful woman sitting in front of me.

Reaching for my cherry coke, I looked up at Bo. "Will you read pages six and seven, Effy will read Nigel."

I sat back in the chair and watched Bo and Effy do the read through. This time I didn't zone out, I actually paid attention to the way Bo moved, the way she delivered the lines and the way she fell into Annie without a second thought. She was completely perfect for the role and no matter what my ill feelings were towards her, she had the part. This movie would not work without her in the lead role.

When the two women were done, I nodded, keeping my game face on. "Thank you, that was decent." I cleared my throat, taking the notes Effy had taken during the small interview. "I have a few more auditions to do, but I will be in touch with you over the next few days." I glanced at Effy's messy handwriting, she had written she's perfect and circled it twice. I shot my assistant a look, receiving a cheeky wink in turn.

I scowled back, turning to Bo sitting there more nervous than before, "I know the studio has paid for you to stay in England for the rest of the week. Please leave a number that we can reach you at, I will make my decision by the time you your flight heads back to the states." I stood up, picking up the script and the other head shots.

"Thank you, Ms. Lewis again, for this opportunity. I know it sounds cheesy and you've heard it a million times, but I would love to work with you." Bo stood up, issuing the last pleading comments. She suddenly looked down at her hands, nodding, "Thank you."

Effy went to escort her to the front door when I spoke up, no longer to resist inquiring, "Do you remember doing the Boston ComicCon seven years ago?"

Bo looked up, her eyes wide and searching her memories, "I barely do, I was doing endless promotion for World's Unknown and travelling so much I never knew what day it was." She chewed on her bottom lip, "I remember going to Boston, but it was under so much stress from the producer's and the studio." She sighed, "I wasn't exactly always one hundred percent there. I treated them like lines at a bank. Move people in and out with a fake smile and handshake." She looked up, meeting my eyes, "I regret my behavior back then, I was a selfish self-entitled star that should have known it wouldn't have lasted."

I studied the brunette, trying to find any inkling that her acting skills were on display, but all I saw was pure honest regret. "I can imagine, I had attended that event, it was very packed that weekend. I vaguely remember having to stand in line for three hours to meet you."

I watched as brown eyes grew confused and fearful, "You did?" I could almost see her searching her memory to place me there. She wouldn't all she would find was the chubby, plain, nerdy and nervous girl trying to push the script she was now auditioning for. Not the famous director standing before her, holding her possible future in my hands.

I smiled, nodding, "I did." I motioned to Effy to escort Bo to the door, "Effy will be in touch, have a good evening Ms. Dennis."

I turned and walked out of the den and towards the kitchen, letting out a slow breath. I so badly wanted to throw a bad encounter in her face, tell her how big of a bitch she was seven years ago and that I could turn her silly commercial acting career into less. But, I didn't.

Bo Dennis, no matter the bad taste she left in my mouth from seven years ago, was perfect and had just won the role that would change her life.

But I would make it easy for the woman. I was known to be a perfectionist work horse of a director. Not stopping until I had pulled the best out of every aspect of the film I was creating.

"Well that was interesting, Lauren." Effy sashayed into the kitchen, sliding over a small piece of paper with telephone numbers scribbled on it. "You have that poor woman rattled to the point she is probably throwing up in the bushes."

I chuckled, picking up an apple from the fruit bowl in front of me, "I held back. There was so much more I wanted to say, but I guess I still have a heart in this chest of mine."

"Good thing, I suppose." Effy set down a new stack of head shots on the counter, "I can call the studio and have the next batch video conference the audition. I fear the studio is growing tired of flying rejects out here."

Biting into the apple, I shook my head, "Call the studio and tell them to work up a contract and send it to Bo Winter's agent. Also, tell them that I will have the rest of the cast picked by the end of the week."

"Are you saying you've gone against all of your ill wills and chosen Ms. Dennis?" Effy's smirk made me roll my eyes.

"I have yes. But let's wait a few more days, make her sweat it out. When you call her agent, tell him that I want to make the congratulations call myself." I looked up at my assistant, "She's perfect and I hate that."

Effy chuckled, picking up her phone, "And you will make her know it for the next handful of months. I could see the look in her eyes when you brought up that comic con from years past."

I shrugged, "It still bothers me." I turned to head to the bedroom, "I do want to see the look on her face when I tell her the script she won the lead role in was the same one she threw out seven years ago."

"You're a feisty one, Lauren." Effy winked at me, "We'll get along perfectly."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

A more than a few days passed before I found the time to call Bo for a meeting. I had gotten swept up in finalizing casting the last of the roles and setting up their schedule with the production office.

"Effy! I can't find my phone." I shoved around stacks of script pages covering the desk. I was running late to meeting Bo and already in a bad mood, "I swore I brought it in here with me after calling the producer."

Effy sauntered around the corner, holding up my jacket and cell phone in both hands, "You left it in the kitchen as you ranted about how the executive producer was a stupid fucking twat."

I half smiled walking over to the woman, "Well, he is. Has no idea what he's supposed to be doing and therefore is getting in my way. I may have him fired on Monday." I slipped the jacket on and took the cell phone, "Any word from Ms. Dennis?"

"One phone call five minutes ago, inquiring if she was at the right café." Effy smiled, "I told her she was indeed at the right place and that I would be meeting her shortly, stuck in traffic and whatnot." The taller woman folded her arms across her chest, "She is nervous, expecting me to hand down the rejection of a lifetime that will seal the nail in the coffin of returning to a boring life teaching drama at the local community college."

I chuckled, "Thank you for setting me up." I grabbed the car keys, "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were evil under all those etiquette classes."

Effy cocked a perfect eyebrow, "I am very evil, Lauren, loyal and evil." She winked before shoving towards the door. "Out you go, you have a full day of location scouting today. Up in the murky highlands of Scotland."

I waved at her, "Please find my boots?" I laughed harder when Effy held them up from the front door. The woman was efficient and predicted everything, I would have to think about hiring her full time when the production ended.

I drove quickly through the light traffic of the city and parked the rental car behind the café. I rushed around the corner, finger combing out a few loose strands, groaning as I was horribly late to this small meeting. As I pushed the door open to the small nondescript café I had Effy find for the meeting, I let out a slow breath. My nerves had risen out of nowhere and it was strange. I hadn't been nervous about anything in years, only cranky and determined and as I scanned the room, latching on to Bo sitting in the corner quietly, I frowned deeper. She was the reason why I was mildly nervous. The inner geek that stood in front of her all those years ago was poking her head out and getting excited to be close to her. I rolled my eyes, reminding myself the experience of that day and how it took away all of the attractiveness of this woman staring down at a large cup of coffee and a croissant that had been picked at mercilessly.

I shifted the thick packet of the script and her contract, under my arm and moved towards the table Bo sat at.

I cleared my throat, reaching for the empty chair in front of her, "I apologize for being so disgustingly late, morning conference calls ran late." I smiled as Bo's eyes grew wide when she saw me. I set the packet down on the chair next to me as I shrugged off my jacket.

"I, uh, I thought I was meeting with Effy?" She straightened up, nervously smoothing out her loose sweater.

I smiled looking over the woman, she was still as beautiful as she was on that television show. Older and yet aging with an old movie star quality about her, if I didn't hate her so much, I would probably be flirting up a storm with her in the next few minutes. But romance and any idea of it was far from being anywhere near my agenda for the next year or so as I started this next project, and this woman would just be a quick romp to fulfill whatever vengeful desire I needed to sate, nothing more.

I shrugged, "I like to do these meetings in person, makes it seem less impersonal when I go through an agent. It also gives me an opportunity to give some advice, tips to the actor to work on for next time." I smiled softly, watching Bo's reaction. She completely thought this was the rejection she had been worrying that croissant over for the last hour. I turned to the waitress who popped over, "Can I have a double espresso latte and two fresh croissants?"

The waitress grinned at me, a flicker of recognition passing over her bright eyes before hustling over to fulfill my order. I turned back to Bo, who was looking at me with a heavy downtrodden look.

"Ms. Lewis, I appreciate you meeting with me, but I understand if I wasn't your top choice. I was very nervous in that audition and it's been a while since I have done a feature film audition." She smiled tightly, reaching for the large brown coffee mug. "I'd be happy to hear any advice you have for me, although I think this might be my last audition for a while."

I raised an eyebrow at her, "To be honest, no you were not my top choice." Her smile dampened and she looked harder at the coffee mug, "You were my only choice from the second I started writing this script." I let out a sigh as the young me won out and couldn't handle the sadness oozing out of the woman in front of me, taking the fun out of playing her along. I lifted the packet up and set it on the corner next to her, "I always meet first hand with my lead actors when I tell them they've won the role. It gives me a chance to go over expectations and get inside the actor who will be ultimately bringing life to my characters. It helps me find a groove to direct you to allow us both to achieve our full potential."

Bo was now staring at me, tears right on the edge of her brown eyes, "Wait, are you saying I…I got the role?"

I nodded, smiling, "Yes, you did." I tapped the packet, "Inside is the final script, your contract and the rest of the information to get you rolling on wardrobe and the training you will need to become Annie." I turned away for a second, smiling and taking the coffee from the waitress, "You did a stellar job at the audition. I particularly enjoyed that you dressed for the part, none of the other's did that." I sipped the warm liquid, sighing how delicious it was and that I would have to keep this café on file for the next few months.

Oh my god, I can't believe it." Bo picked up the packet, her hands trembling, "I didn't think I got it, that you would ever pick a washed up cult star like me." She raised her eyes to meet mine again, "I spent the last of the royalties to fly out here, I was expecting to go home and go back to working at the college teaching drama."

I chuckled, Effy was deviously good at her job, "You'll see that you will be compensated appropriately for this new job, along with the perks of working on one of my films." I set the coffee down, scrunching my face up, "But I have some rules for my actors."

Bo grinned, nodding, "Of course yes, I've heard you run a tight ship."

I rolled my eyes, I did run a tight ship and I was notorious for not putting up with bullshit egos, having fired one or two Academy Award winners on my productions for brining too much bullshit to the job. I was a bitch at times, I knew I had that reputation along with being moody, but I had to be that way. I had changed and wouldn't let anyone or anything ruin the job at hand. Yes, I was making movies and making millions doing nothing but that, but it was my work and I wouldn't let anyone mess with it. "I do, so with that, you will read in your contract that I have an at will clause. I can and will remove you from the project if at any point I or the production team feel you are jeopardizing the quality of work. I also don't do well with egos, you will treat the press and any fans with grace as you come across them. Since this is my first film in a few years and a major production, the press and fans will be everywhere."

I stared at the woman as she listened intently. I knew she would, this was her first big break in years and it would be stupid of her not to listen.

"I understand, Ms. Lewis. I've had my experiences with fans and I have always tried to treat them with kindness and respect." She smiled softly at me, "I doubt anyone will remember me, though. I've been a forgotten star for years now." She tipped her head back down at the packet.

I clenched my jaw, my light tone throughout the conversation had definitely changed. I shook my head, unbelievable I was still stuck on one experience with Bo Dennis so many years later. "There's no trying here, Bo. You should and will treat the fans and everyone with respect. I know there will be issues with the press and fans, Effy has drafted up a protocol and security outline for the cast." I glanced at my phone, Effy had texted me that I was needed in a half hour to meet with the location scout and my assistant director. I sighed, agitated, "I need to leave, I have another meeting." I stood up, and grabbed my jacket as I set a few pounds down on the table, "Read over everything and if you have questions, contact Effy. Rehearsal meetings start in two weeks, plenty of time to get settled in and meet with everyone."

Bo stood up with me, nervously fidgeting, "Okay, um, thank you again, Ms. Lewis. I can't thank you enough about all of this. I'm going to give you my best, I was meant to play Annie and that's not me blowing smoke in your face. I really connect with this character." She smiled sheepishly.

I rolled my eyes as I looked at the waitress, pointing that I had left money on the table, "Then do it, you don't need to tell me." I tugged on the edges of my sleeves, looking up in her brown eyes, unable to resist as her over exuberance was annoying me, it felt fake like it did when I met her years ago. "You were meant to play Annie. I wrote this script almost eight years ago, tailored the lead role to you." I paused, watching Bo's brow scrunch together. I blew out a laugh, "I met you seven years ago at a convention, tried to give you this script. You blew me off and then I watched as you threw this script into the trash can with a empty coffee cup." I raised my eyebrows with a smirk, "You're partly the reason why I added in the clause about treating fans, I never want another eager young mind to endure disappointment when meeting an idol."

I grabbed a croissant, looking at the pale white face of my lead actor. Maybe the memory of meeting me kicked in or she was terribly embarrassed, either way, it didn't matter and I had gotten it off my chest. "Have a nice afternoon, Bo. Effy will be in touch tomorrow to get the contracts from you."

I turned and walked out of the café, smiling to myself as the feeling of that weight I had carried for seven years was finally lifted off of me. When I sat in my rental, I looked at the keychain hanging from the gear shift, it was an old World's Unknown logo I had taken with me since that convention. It was my token of drive, always driving me to work harder and get to the point in my career that I could do what I just did.

Sit across from my idol and have her idolize me. Then I crushed her as I gave her and I both the opportunity to heal, and create the dream I had set for both of us so many years ago. I sighed, rubbing at my eyes, finishing the last two bites of the croissant, regretting instantly that I had let my temper take over and treat Bo like I did. I was better than that, but maybe I wasn't.

I started the car right when Effy called me, "Lauren, the location scout is here and is currently scouting out why there's no furniture in your home and that the back garden would make a great space for a toothpaste commercial. Where the bloody hell are you?"

"I'm leaving the café, should be home in fifteen minutes." I slammed the car into gear and sped off, "Tell him to sit down in the kitchen and use your feminine wiles on him." I heard her chuff in the background, I smiled and looked up in the rearview mirror to catch Bo walking out of the café. She was clutching the packet to her chest, wiping at her eyes. I drove past and took a quick look, feeling my heart sink at the sight of not happy tears on her face, but the other kind.

"Shit." I groaned, turning back to the road and Effy talking. "Yes, fifteen minutes. Now let me get there." I hung up the phone and tossed it in the console. Taking another glance in the mirror, I bit my bottom lip at the sight of Bo hailing a cab.

This was not how I wanted to start this production. A crying lead actor was bad luck, especially one that I already had a semi history with.

Hopefully I could turn it around at the rehearsals.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Effy walked with me as we made our way to the conference room where the first script read through was to take place. "Did everyone make it on time?" I squinted even though I had glasses on, flipping pages of production nonsense.

"Everyone was early except for Austin. He waddled in three minutes late, blithering about some award after party he attended. Something about how he drank all night with Prince Harry and the lot." Effy rolled her eyes as she flicked through the tablet in her hands. "Everyone is accounted for, the main cast that is. The supporting cast will meet tomorrow."

I nodded, shoving the pile of papers in my hand under my arm, "The six of them, then. This should go smoothly, I have emails that Bo and Elizabeth need to do wardrobe after. Then they all meet with the military coordinator and nurse instructors." I sighed, "I hate pre-production."

Effy chuckled, "We all do, my dear, we all do." She stopped in front of a door, looking at me with a hand on the doorknob, "Ready?"

I took in a deep breath, "Yes." I adjusted my glasses and waited for Effy to open the door.

I looked up in the conference room to see my six leads sitting at the conference table, chatting, drinking and eating from the craft table offerings. I smiled, "Good morning all, I hope you are all excited to get this read through started."

There was a collective murmur of excitement, all eyes falling on me as I set down the stack of paper on the desk and took the offered script from Effy. I scanned the room, checking that my five were all here and alert. First was Elizabeth Young. She was playing Annie's best friend and she was grinning at me with very expressive blue eyes. Next was Alan Black, he was my lead for the trauma doctor that worked with the nurses, he was followed by Karen Belvedere, the bold English actress that was perfect for my head nurse role. Her and Alan looked my way with strong confidence that came with professional working actors.

Then there was Austin Tatum, my American leading actor. He was dashing with black hair and bold green eyes that had swept the world into love with him. He was a talented actor and knew it, which had him in and out of the tabloids for his playboy ways. I hired him because he was perfect to play the flyboy that was snatching Annie's heart in the beginning. He was currently nursing a black coffee under dark sunglasses and being nudged by one of my favorite actresses to work with and my lead female love interest since the last film. Gillian Harris was an unknown actress that had an Academy Award for Cold Water's Edge and she was my go to. Tall, elegant, with dark auburn hair and intense ice blue eyes, she was gorgeous and perfect for any woman to fall in love with. She had a vicious wit and intelligence about her that was highlighted by her Irish accent. She winked at me, shoving Austin again to get him to focus. I smiled a polite thank you and looked to the far corner of the table where Bo sat quietly reading over her script.

The way she sat made it look like she was outcasted from the rest. She looked up as I greeted the room, her eyes soft when they met mine and she smiled tightly before turning back to her script notes. I chewed the inside of my lip, I had definitely been a bit too harsh with the woman at the café. I would have to do some sort of damage control to get her more involved with the cast. I wanted to create chemistry within the cast so it would translate on film.

I sat down in the chair, sighing, "Okay, I assume you all have read the script?"

Another collective murmuring and nods filled the room, I smiled, "Great, so you all know that this story is a love story and not the traditional one." I waved around the room, "So I want you all to sit next to your love interests. Elizabeth move next to Austin, Austin and Gillian, you two will sit around Bo as you two both will have invested interest in Annie as we progress. Alan and Karen, well you know the drill." I grinned at the hearty chuckle from Alan as he placed a kiss on Karen's cheek.

Bo went to move, but Gillian's hand on her shoulder stopped her from getting up, "It's okay, you stay here my dear." She took the seat to Bo's right as Austin stumbled off to the left. Gillian gave me a look and I shrugged, we had crafted the silent way of communicating on the last film and over the few months we were seeing each other and keeping it out of the press.

"Seeing as you all are a mix of English, Irish and American, I expect all of you to work together on the accents." I glared at Austin, "Meaning, Mr. Tatum, I want a real English accent out of you and not the Mary Poppins crap you pulled in your audition." I pointed at Alan and Karen, "These two are your best resources."

Austin blushed under his sunglasses, but tried to laugh it off, "I have a dialect coach, my agent got one from the list your assistant provided me." He cleared his throat, "I've been listening to Harry while we share drinks, I think I got it."

I rolled my eyes, this man was already annoying me. "Take the sunglasses off and focus." I looked around the room, "Alright, let's get to it. Page one. Effy will prompt the action in-between dialogue." I then looked at Elizabeth and Bo, "If you two come across some medical terms you can't understand, highlight them, I have the nurse instructor coming in later today. She will expand on the things you have questions about."

Elizabeth grinned that girl next door smile that won her the role, "I will have plenty, I barely understand half of the nurse lingo my character spills out." She laughed, "Right Bo?"

Bo nodded slowly, glancing at me quickly before looking back down at her notes.

I sighed, I would have to talk to Bo later. I needed a strong Annie for this film, hence why I wrote it for Bo and ultimately chose her. She was strong, she was tough, she was beautiful, kind and innocent. She was Annie and I needed her to bring that to the table, not the sulking, timid defeated woman who I was sure was debating if she really needed this movie or if she could live off of community college salary.

I tore my eyes away from the woman, "Okay, let's go." I pointed at Effy to begin the narration for the opening.

* * *

Two hours later, most of it painful due to Austin's hungover performance, Effy called for a lunch break.

I slid my glasses off to rub at my eyes, the cast moving out of the room eagerly for a break and some food. I would have to start looking for a second for Austin if he continued this behavior and ran through lines like he was answering questions asked by a teacher. I looked at Effy collecting her tablet, "Have them back in an hour and make sure Austin sobers up."

She nodded with a smirk, "The conversation I'm about to have with him will do the trick." Effy patted my shoulder, "Not only is he wasting your time, but mine as well. I don't care if he's rumored to have a cock the size of Italy, he's a lazy prick."

I gave Effy a shocked look, "When you're done with that, can you bring me a…"

"Turkey club and a cherry coke, already on the way." Effy winked at me, striding out of the room calling after Austin. I would definitely be stealing this woman away from the production company when the film wrapped.

"Lauren, can I talk you into joining me for lunch?" Gillian's smooth Irish voice broke my thoughts. She leaned against the table, smiling down at me, "Get caught up on what's been happening since last years Oscars."

I couldn't help but smile at her, Gillian had charisma and charm that exceeded her looks. I slide my glasses back on, "I have lunch coming here, I need to work through it." I looked up in to a pair of mischievous green eyes that could seduce the pants right off me from across the room. "And you know what happened over the last year. Your lovely lady friend back in Toronto coming for set visits?"

Gillian rolled her eyes and pushed away from the table, "Oh she's not much of a lady friend. Just a friend I call upon from time to time. She reached up, running a few fingers through my shorter blonde hair. "I like the haircut, makes you seem less innocent, less corruptible." She smirked at me, "Reminds me of that time at the Golden Globes."

I sighed, my body having an adverse reaction to her touch and the memories in the back seat of my limo on the way to the award ceremony. Gillian was adventurous and talented in many ways. I grabbed her hand, pulling it down, "Gillian, you know we had our time." I sighed, looking at her hand in mine, "But."

Gillian rolled her eyes, "The but." She ran a thumb over my knuckles, "One day, you need to explain the but. The reason why you can't ever give more of yourself."

I stared in the expressive green eyes of the feisty Irishwoman who had gotten the closest ever to me throwing it all to the wind and ignoring my own set of rules. Never fall in love again, that was the but. I never wanted to fall in love like I had and had my characters fall, it was nothing but heartbreak and felt fake. "One day, Gillian." I smiled softly, "You did get pretty close."

Gillian leaned down, her face inches away from me, "I'd like to get close again, Lauren. I've missed you."

"Oh, um, excuse me." The sound of Bo's voice shoved Gillian and I apart like a door had closed in our faces. I whipped my head around to see a very red faced Bo tipping her head down as she rushed to her seat, "I forgot my phone." She scooped it up and kept her head down as she attempted to make her exit.

Gillian gave me a quiet smirk, released my hand and moved out of the room. I scrunched my face up, glancing at Bo trying to take the same exit, "Wait a second Bo."

Bo froze. "I didn't see anything." She smiled tightly, fidgeting with her phone.

I stood up, shrugging to try and recover the confidence that Gillian blew to shreds with her mere presence. The woman was a walking sexpot that melted all of my wills, morals, and thoughts to goo. "You saw what you saw, it doesn't matter." I folded my arms across my chest, the faded logo of whatever band crinkling up, "I wanted to talk to you, about the last time we met."

Bo looked up at me with an even tighter fake smile on her face, "You made it very clear your expectations. I read over the contract and signed it." She turned to look out the doorway, "I understand everything." Her face twitched for a second before looking at me, "I know my behavior a few years ago was undesirable. I made mistakes." She turned away from me, "And I paid for them."

She took a step closer to the door, "You won't have to worry about it happening again." Bo took another step, I quickly grabbed her arm gently.

"Wait, Bo, please give me a minute." I paused at the way her skin was so warm under my palm. I looked down, I had barely noticed what she was wearing when I walked into the room, but now my eyes roamed. Bo was wearing a loose button down with the sleeves rolled up to her bicep, a tight grey tank top visible underneath where her shirt opened a few buttons down. Her hair was up in a ponytail and the woman only wore some lip gloss. I swallowed hard at how attractive she was, her cheeks flushing at the signs of embarrassed frustration settling in.

"It's fine, I promise. I've been in the business long enough to know when to play dumb." She glanced down at my hand wrapped around her arm. "I need this job, so I saw nothing." Bo politely freed her arm from my hand. "I should get to the cafeteria, I left Austin nursing a cup of black coffee." She smiled tightly, looking up in my eyes.

I slipped my hand into the pocket of my jeans. This woman held an intensity in her eyes that told me that she had been on the pervy end of a casting couch, been at the mercy of a handsy producer, and it had left her with scars. "You don't need to forget anything, you don't need to worry about any backlash for my own behavior." I held her eyes, hoping that my tone was softening in a way that I was coming across genuine. "Gillian and I were in the tabloids a few years back, so there's nothing there the world already doesn't know." I smiled softly. "They forgot about us a second later." I paused, Bo's eyes were locked on me, making my stomach quiver. There was a hum in the air around this woman that was far different than the one I felt when I first met her all those years ago. It was deeper, stronger and made me want to be kinder to her. "I want to apologize for being an ass when we met in the café. When I offered you the role, the snide comments I made about the past. It wasn't wholly intentional." I looked to the window. "You are Annie. You are going to be incredible from what I've already seen. Mastering nurse lingo, or not, you're already surpassing my expectations and I wanted to let you know that even as I'm notoriously moody, and will be difficult through this whole process, you're going to make this picture. Make it what it was meant to be when I wrote it." I turned back to look at Bo, her eyes had softened and glossed over. The sight made my stomach wiggle again, that damn hum thickening as I cleared my throat. "This film will change your life, are you ready for it? Ready for the second wave of fame you might find on your doorstep?"

I didn't mean for it to sound so egotistical, but I knew what was coming. I knew the production company, the studio, and everyone else behind me had been pumping the PR machine on this film already. It was going to change all of my actors lives in one way, or another, and it had me discreetly worried for Bo. Another sign that I was letting my own past creep up and try to grasp onto something I had left in that convention hall seven years ago.

Bo nodded, squeezing her cell phone. "I have nothing to lose at this point, so I guess I'm ready for anything." She turned to the sound of Alan and Karen laughing from outside the room. Bo let out a slow breath, before turning to look back at me. "Thank you, again. For this. For giving me this role." She tipped her head down, "I know you have a reputation for being a tough, fair, and private director. I was scared at first to work with you." Bo slowly looked up. "Thank you for being honest with me, I promise I won't tell the others about this. This side of you."

I gave her a look. "What do you mean?" I was falling into a strange sense of ease with Bo, there was something about her that made me want to actually talk to her, and not be the director. Plus, the more she relaxed the more beautiful she became. This was a far cry from the uptight diva actress I met at that con and changed my life. She was just a woman, grasping onto the second chance I had handed over to her.

Bo half smiled. "The way you're looking at me now, your eyes are soften when you speak from the heart. They become kind." She shrugged, waving a hand around the room. "I've been watching everyone during the table read. To get a feel for them. You look at everyone like a boss should, with expectations and professionalism. Except Austin, you look at him like you want to throttle him with the script." She chuckled, as I nodded in agreement. "You look at Alan and Karen like they're cherish old family members, and Gillian, well deer in headlights is the best I can describe it."

I felt my cheeks flush. "You've met her. The woman, is a force to be reckoned with." I was impressed by Bo's skills on reading the room. "Where did you learn this skill of yours? Reading people?"

Bo looked down at her hands. "I should go, get something to eat before I run out of time." Bo's demeanor had changed on a dime, and she had closed completely up. She took a step towards the door. "I'll be back in a few minutes with the rest of the cast. Thank you." She slipped out of the room as if our conversation never happened, leaving me mildly confused.

"Careful Lauren, the ice around you is melting." Effy's voice entered the room before I noticed she had physically come to stand next to me. She set a plate with my turkey sandwich down on the table, an ice cold cherry coke with it.

I glared at her, falling back into the chair and letting out a heavy sigh. "What's that supposed to mean?"

The taller woman grinned as she sat across from me, straightening out script pages. "It means there's chemistry in the air and it's not between Austin and the mirror he stares into every chance he gets. Nor is it the firestorm of sexuality that Gillian leaves behind her every step when she's around you." Effy winked at me. "I see things, I know things, I'm not the best assistant in the company for how fast I can get coffee."

I picked up the sandwich, taking a large bite before I asked. "Then, oh mighty seer, what is the chemistry brewing in the air?"

Effy kept her head down, writing notes as she spoke. "It's you and that poor girl who's walking around like this is a dream she's going to wake up from. Wake up at her cheap desk in the community college theater room where she's been teaching the locals how to act." Effy glanced up at me. "She watches you, watches you like my mum watches my dad fiddle with the evening paper. Like he's the only in the world and she trying to memorize every minute he's in it with her. The girl likes you."

I chuckled around a mouthful of food. "She likes that I gave her a job."

Effy leaned back in her chair. "Well, you should have seen the look on her face when she spotted you and your ex a few minutes ago. It was like she saw the ghost of high heartbreak." She flicked a pen at me. "The girl has a wee bit of a crush on you that moves past finally giving her enough money to buy the nice frozen dinners, and not the clearance ones in the back of the grocery store." She then grinned. "And by what I eavesdropped on, you feel something for her."

I laughed outright, trying to cover up that my gut was telling me Effy was right. "No. There's not. I was just taking your advice and trying to apologize for my need to be an ass when I offered her the role."

Effy stared at me. "I never gave you such advice." She shrugged, smiling as I blushed. "Well, either way, it's a moot point perhaps. Our boy Austin is already talking about taking Bo to dinner this weekend, for research and she agreed. Eagerly. Seems we may have an on set romance in a couple of weeks." She turned back to her notes. "How late do you want to take the table read today? So I can schedule wardrobe fittings."

I wasn't listening to Effy, I was too focused on the strange wiggle of jealousy that came up in the pit of my stomach hearing Austin's intentions. He was a playboy and ran through woman like he ran through overpriced underwear. I felt my jaw clench as I set my sandwich down. I cleared my throat, reaching for Effy's notes. "Go to five then have two hours of wardrobe sessions. Then schedule Bo and Elizabeth with the medical experts." I sighed heavily, scanning over the schedule Effy had drafted up.

"Nothing there at all. Yeah, I certainly see it as your brow furrows into deep lines of jealousy, mixed with ideas of firing our lead actor." Effy didn't give me a chance to reply, only handing me the location packet, forcing me to focus on that and not thoughts of how she was far too perceptive.

"Just in case, can you compile a list of actors that auditioned before the studio forced Austin on me?" I glanced at Effy who was smirking and nodding.

"Of course, Lauren."


	4. Chapter 4

**N: again, slow updates as this story comes and goes as i come and go. it's going somewhere, i haven't figured out where yet or if i will do alternating pov's yet. Anyways, read on and note the bits about grandparents, is actually about my grandparents. That's a story that i will be working on in the future, the story of how they fell in love during the war and only through letters. A personal project that won't ever become a ff, but a book for my family to keep as 70 plus year old letters grow older. Anyway, here's chapter four and who knows if it makes sense, i have a headache and my brain has been taxed by everything of the last few weeks. Enjoy!**

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I sat with my head cradled in my hands, frustrated and mentally exhausted. I had left the small conference room where the first read through was taking place, and went outside to sit in the cool air. Austin had sobered up just enough, but was horrible. Forcing his English accent to the point that it was embarrassing. I suffered, along with the others, for three hours until we finished the read through. The idiot thought he delivered his best, and I was about to tell him that my mother's thirteen year old daschund had a better English accent, but I was held back by Effy. The woman already well read in knowing when I was about to lose my cool.

I called the read through and sent the actors off to their varying stations for prep. The only good thing that happened at that table read was Gillian and Bo had found a foundation to build off of. Granted, Gillian could melt anyone's will, but I could tell the two had chemistry and it would only grow as their working relationship strengthened. I also had taken notice of Bo glancing at me every three seconds when someone else was reading their bit. I could feel her look at me, and it was unnerving. Unnerving because I was now hyper aware of Bo, and that spelled trouble. Whenever I became hyper aware of anyone in my life, it complicated things. Gillian was a prime explain of that.

I groaned, looking up at the late evening sky, wondering if this project was worth going through with, or if I was better off making a rom com that required little effort and make a trillion dollars at the box office.

"You know murder in this country used to be a crime punished by beheading." Effy's voice fell right behind me.

I sighed. "Even if it's murder of an American actor with an over inflated ego?"

She chuckled, stepping next to me and handing me a bottle of cherry coke. "Well, that might earn a Queen's honor." She slowly sat down next to me on the stone step. "Fancy that we're sitting in front of a replica of the Tower of London. Where Elizabeth the first was imprisoned."

I glanced over my shoulder, smiling at the perfectly constructed tower. Made to look like indestructible stone, when it was just wood, plaster, and movie magic. "Fancy that." I turned back, looking down as I fiddled with the top of the coke bottle. "I need to fire him. Yesterday, and before he gets fitted for wardrobe."

Effy handed me over a thick pile of white papers. "We can do it on Monday. I searched his contract and found a loophole. If said actor doesn't meet his commitment of punctuality for one week, he voids all terms of his contract. He was late this morning, and will be again tomorrow. He has plans to drink London dry with Harry tonight. Therefore, breaking his contract and giving us carte blanche to send him home, posthaste."

I caught the corner of a smirk forming on her face as I flipped to the highlighted section. "Well, I'll be. I should probably read my contract before you find a loophole that has me throwing out this entire project and directing perfume commercials for Chanel again."

Effy let out a exaggerated gasp, her hand falling to her chest in mock surprise. "I would never!" She winked at me. "Even though that one you directed with Cate Blanchett is Oscar worthy on its own. Sixty seconds of pure art."

I chuckled handing the contract back to my assistant. "Sixty seconds that took three weeks to film." I leaned forward on my knees. "But Cate hasn't stopped calling me to work with me. Maybe I'll cast her in Austin's role." I groaned rubbing my face. "How are the others faring?"

Effy flipped open her notebook, reading over carefully taken notes. "Alan and Karen are brilliant. Old professionals who need no guidance. They've been on top of everything on their own. Elizabeth is struggling with the medical jargon, but has asked for the nurse we hired to spend all of her extra time working on it. Gillian, well Gillian is gliding about as she does. The woman commands a room and is a professional. She's been fitted and is already ahead of the rest." Effy handed me a folded over piece of paper. "She did ask me to give you this, with a wink and a smile." She let out a sigh. "Good lord that woman can change the sexuality of anyone with that smile of hers."

I cocked an eyebrow at my assistant, tucking the note into my back pocket. "This is I know, but hands off. She will ruin you for life, in good ways and bad ways." I opened the cherry coke, taking a quick sip before asking about the last actor. "Bo?"

Effy grinned at me. "Saving the best for last already?" She nudged me in the shoulder when I groaned. "Bo is quiet. She moved through wardrobe with no hassle, flew through the medical session, and is currently walking around the studio grounds with her script." Effy closed her notebook. "She did corner me before I came out to see you, asking where you had disappeared to after I calmed you down from exploding all over Austin."

I kept my eyes forward, staring at a fake cobblestone. "Oh, she did?" I turned to look at the woman, noting how she didn't look like she had just spent almost thirteen hours trapped in a stuffy room, taking notes and listening to people run lines over and over. "What did you tell her?" My heart did a quick skip as I asked the question.

Another cheeky grin fell across the girl's face. "I told her that you were in your office drinking copious amounts of liquor to chase out the memory of Austin butchering my native tongue." She winked at me, patting my back. "I told her you had phone calls to make and that you had called it a day. Her eyes dimmed in the slightest, and she shuffled off."

I nodded, twirling the bottle in my hands. "The chemistry needs to be between Gillian and Bo, not Bo and I." I glanced at Effy. "So please…don't."

She held up a hand stopping me. "I will accept your need to live in denial." She stood up, brushing the dust from the back of her skirt. "As for chemistry, it's off the charts with Gillian and Bo. This movie is going to be your best, those two have a unique connection that translates beyond the camera." Effy smiled softly. "I watch too, watch how all the actors interact. Everyone is perfect except that mile of beef shit Austin." She turned to walk back to wherever she came from. "But the strongest chemical bond building, is between you and her. It's in the way she looks at you, and the way you look away from her when your eyes meet. It's subtle, but it's there, Lauren."

I sighed and went to issue a retort of denial, no not denial, a retort of truth. I felt nothing for Bo, but when I went to turn and tell Effy that, she had disappeared into the shadows of the tower. Leaving me with a mildly irritated feeling. Irritated about Austin, and irritated that deep down in the pit of my stomach, Effy was right.

I stood up, and started walking through the medieval set. I wanted to go check on the drawings for my sets in the carpenter's office before I went home. I wanted to do anything to fill my mind with work and not bullshit matters of the heart. I didn't like Bo, I tolerated her because she was a co-worker. A subordinate of sorts, nothing more. I frowned, trying to fill my head with more harsh terms that would pull Bo further into a category where I would only think about her like I did the others. Actors I needed to direct. I walked quickly, reaching for the note from Gillian and opening it up.

Even the woman's handwriting was sexy.

 _-Lauren, Dinner? Tonight? Then very late night drinks at my cottage and perhaps a very early breakfast in bed?-_

I sighed harder, jamming the note back into my pocket. Gillian was a weakness of mine, and when I closed my eyes I saw flashes of our time together. Intense, passionate, loving, and incredible. But it lacked something in all of that. Something I wanted nothing to do with at this point in my life, but I also didn't want to have another on set romp with Gillian. It would be amazing and probably ease all of the stress I was carrying on my shoulders, but she would eventually get to that point again. The point where she wanted more from me, and I couldn't give it to her. More so, didn't want to give it to her. Fear was the only antidote to falling in love, I was always afraid to have my heart broken so I was never poisoned by love. I liked it that way, and wanted to keep it that way. At least until this film was done.

I kept my head down, reaching back to pull my shoulder length hair back into a ponytail when I cut the next corner a little too close, and slammed into someone. A large collective oof falling from both of us as we stumbled to catch our balance. I watched as my thick script slapped to the ground with a satisfying thud.

"Oh crap." The voice of the person I ran into, slipped into my ears, immediately forcing my eyes up. Bo was bending down to grab the script, talking with flushed cheeks. "I shouldn't walk and read at the same time."

I smiled at the cute tone in her voice, making me think this wasn't the first time she walked into someone with her head buried into a script. "You know the chairs in the studio's research library are quite comfortable."

Bo's head shot up when she heard my voice, she quickly stood up straight, clutching the script to her chest as her cheeks grew a brighter shade of red. "Lauren! Oh…I'm so sorry for slamming into you. I didn't see you, I was, um…reading and making notes." She tapped the script tightly pressed against her chest. She locked eyes with me and that stupid hum filled my ears, a hum wrapped around Effy's stupid chemistry theory. Good lord Bo's eyes were incredible, big and brown and beautiful.

I shrugged. "No apologies necessary. I wasn't paying a lick of attention myself. Lost in thought." I clenched my jaw and frowned, I suddenly wanted to walk away. "Enjoy your night off, Bo. I will see you first thing in the morning for your read through with Gillian and Elizabeth." I went to take a step away.

"Can I ask you a question, Lauren?" Bo's voice was timid, making me cringe at how successful I was at keeping people intimidated.

I spun around to look at her. "I guess, but I do need to get to the carpenter's lot before the crew gets tied up." I internally cringed at how firm, cold, I was being.

Bo smiled softly, nodding, catching my eyes again. "I'll walk with you, I need to head back anyways." It was her tell when she was reading me. "I understand. I need to escape set before Austin catches me again. He wants me to have dinner with him." She bit her bottom lip nervously. "Um, the question is, what's the inspiration behind this script? Annie?"

I started walking in the direction of the workshops, frowning. I really didn't want to share the true foundation of this epic love story I had started in a different lifetime. "That's a very curious question." I kept my eyes ahead, not wanting look at Bo as she moved a little too close as she moved with me. "I'm sure you have your own interpretation of it. Most actors I work with do, it's their process and I leave it to them to figure it out."

"So you can get honest and real performances out of them." Bo spoke evenly, as if this was a fact. She glanced over at me, noting the look on my face. "I read a few interviews from Heavenly Redemption, to learn more about you before I auditioned. The leads all had that to say about your style."

I frowned deeper. "Well, there you have it then. You don't need me to tell you what my inspiration was." I folded my arms across my chest, quickening my step. I really wanted to be away from Bo, her energy, her intelligence, and her keen investigative sense that was already bothering me.

"I want to know, Lauren. I'm not a traditional actor, I need a story behind a story to grab onto. A real story, and reading this script, it feels incredibly real and I…" She stopped suddenly with a huff. Her tone had turned very frustrated, a direct winning result of my own shitty tone with her. "Never mind. I'll guess I'll figure it out like the rest." Bo paused in her steps, leaving me to continue on. "Goodnight, Lauren."

I stopped, letting out a sigh. My mother's voice radiating in my ears, this wasn't how I raised you, Lauren. I closed my eyes, cursing my mother who was across the pond probably cleaning my house in upstate New York against my specific wishes not to. I turned to catch Bo's back to me, her head tilted down as she returned to her script. God what was it about this woman that had me breaking rules left and right and hating it as much as I secretly liked it. "The story, the inspiration is my grandparents on my mother's side. They never met each other even though my grandfather's sister was friends with my grandmother."

Bo's head lifted up, and she stopped walking, but remained facing away from me. I kept on, it was easier to talk to a back. "She started writing letters to him, and soon they fell in love. Never once meeting each other as the world was at war around them. Three years, they wrote every day, and when he came home, they married and were together for almost fifty years. I took that love story and used it as the basis. What if, what if in the middle of war you finally find someone you never expected, and they carry you through hell to end up in the arms of heaven." I shrugged, smiling at the memory of my grandparents. "In full disclosure, Gillian is my grandfather and you, Annie, is my grandmother. Granted she was a rosie the riveter for bombers, and not a war nurse, but you get the idea." I glanced up at the sky. "Much of that script you lug around is based on the stories my grandparents told me, and from me rooting around in the letters my grandmother stashed in an old shoe box. Their love was something I've wanted to find for as long as I can remember, I wrote the script hoping it would manifest into a reality for me. Alas, I've not been that lucky." I looked back down, Bo was now facing me, a soft smile on her face. I swallowed hard at the look in her eyes. I cleared my throat, feeling incredibly embarrassed and shy for revealing so much to this woman. "That's the inspiration."

Bo took a step closer to me. "It's beautiful, Lauren. I meant it when I could feel the real emotions in the dialogue. Now I understand why." She stared at me in a way that had my stomach flipping and my grandmother's voice chiming in the back of my mind. I quietly shushed it away as Bo's hand suddenly appeared on my forearm. God her hand was warm and it sent that warmth throughout my body. "Thank you for telling me the story. Effy and the others kept mentioning you would be standoffish when in work mode, and to not bother you. But, I had to risk it. I had to know more about this script…and you."

The way Bo's voice took a unique dip at the end, had my defenses slipping forth. It felt like she was flirting with me. I took a slow step back, letting Bo's hand fall from my arm. "Flirting with the director will not get you special treatment, Ms. Dennis. We all work, and I expect you to work just as hard as the others." I felt my heart drop that I had just shared something that only my close family knew about why I wrote this script with Bo, only to have her think she could step right into my life and earn a place where no one else had been before.

Bo's face fell, and she shook her head quickly. "No, no I wasn't trying to flirt with you. I was being honest about wanting to know more about the script and you." She frowned tightly, tucking her arm around the script, her face taking on a very upset look. "Whatever, I should know that genuine is a word that no longer exists in this industry." She kept her head down as her jaw twitched. "I'm not an idiot, Lauren, I have my fair share of bruises and scars from my fifteen minutes of fame." She looked up, her eyes filled with angry tears. "I would never put you through what I've been through, and I would never want to hurt you like I did all those years ago again." She took a step back, moving to turn and walk away. "It's been the biggest regret I've carried with me since you told me that day in the coffee shop." Bo smiled tightly and walked away before I could stop her.

I let her go, still digesting my own feelings about our interaction. Mainly the look in her eyes when she emphasized she would never want to hurt me again, a strange choice of words for her to choose. Considering we truly only met a few weeks ago. I shook my head and turned towards the workshops, my grandmother's voice piping in again. Telling me to wake up, take off the jaded glasses, and listen to the hum in the air.

There was something, and a reason why Bo Dennis had fallen back into my life, and become a part of this project of love.

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XXXX

Two Weeks Later

"Austin has been removed from all press releases, contracts, promotional material, and the studio is doing damage control on his tantrums." Effy walked next to me as we trudged up a muddy hill in the northern tip of Scotland. "His replacement, Wynn Edgar, just landed from the states and will be here shortly." Effy handed over the headshot of the handsome, English actor I had initially chosen, but the studio poo poo'd for Austin. I smiled handing the picture back. Austin had done exactly as predicted. Partied too hard at night and would show up hours late the next day, effectively destroying his contract and giving me the ultimate joy in firing the pompous ass. He had a tantrum, as expected, but was hauled off by set security and sent home to deal with the studio executives.

I smiled to myself, the dumb kid would be lucky to get a cologne commercial in the next year due to his behavior. "At least the one dialect coach will be relieved. No more late night sessions with a hungover idiot." I dipped my chin deep into the thick scarf wrapped around my neck. It was a blustery day in Scotland and had rained on the way over to the farm we were using as the main sets for the battle scenes. "Jesus Christ it's cold."

"It's Scotland, Lauren. No Miami, Fiji, or somewhere warm and tropical." Effy sighed, shivering under her breath. "Get used to the mud, this country is nothing but a moss covered bog."

I grinned, chuckling as we crested the hill and saw the tiny production crew I had called up. I wanted to do a few test shots at locations to see how the actors, wardrobe, props, and everything else would look on film. I was big on tweaking in the first few stages, making it an easier shoot in the long run. "Where are the actors?"

Effy moved around me, grabbing my arm to guide me towards a large canvas tent set up next to the old barn. "All of them are tucked in here, huddled over heaters and boiling cups of tea. I think you'll hear not one of them now complain about the thick wool of their costumes."

I laughed, ducking under the canvas flap Effy held up for me to enter the tent. I shook my head with a smile when I saw all of my leads hovering in small groups around space heaters wearing the best reproduction world war two costumes my wardrobe team created, chatting. Alan and Karen were with Elizabeth, telling her tips and tricks about how to stop shivering during a scene as she clutched to a cup of hot tea like it was a lifeline.

Gillian was sitting on top of crates of equipment, bundled up and actively listening to Bo tell some story. Gillian turned her head slightly, catching my eyes and grinned widely when she saw me. I swallowed hard, I had been struggling very hard to keep Gillian at bay and was about to fail. She had asked me to dinner tonight and I accepted, stupidly. I knew what was about to happen, but I couldn't resist the woman and I need a distraction from a certain brunette who had consumed my thoughts since I told her about my grandparents.

That one woman I could resist, and had been ignoring since that awkward moment on the studio sets, turned and caught my eyes. Her big brown ones that were shining with excitement suddenly dimmed with sadness when she saw me. Bo looked between Gillian and I, immediately up on the thick tension that was there, frowned and took a step away from Gillian. I felt that weird hum again, buzzing in my ear like a pissed off bee. I had been very distant with Bo over the last couple of weeks. Only engaging with her when it was necessary and using Effy as my buffer whenever Bo came looking for me.

"Good lord you're buggered yourself into a bit of a love triangle. The sex pot has her hooks in you, and you've shat over the heart of the girl next door." Effy whispered in my ear as she shoved a hot cup of tea in my hand. "I can feel that Bo struggling with her feelings for you, the same way you are struggling keeping your pants on around Gillian."

I turned and glared at my assistant. "Really? Effy? Are we walking on the same planet? Or did you flitter off into bizzarro world?" I sighed, hating that she was completely right. I had been struggling with the way Bo made me feel every time she was in the room, like I had to apologize to her. I wanted to be nice to her, but years of living behind a protective wall driven by my desire to put my work, my art, first, I was distant. That, and I was still angry about our interaction.

Effy nudged me. "We are walking on the same planet, dear Lauren. The one where you're love story is become a real one. One far more complicated than the one you wrote" She took a step away from me, calling the cast to attention. I let her run down the list of what was about to happen over the next few hours as I stood behind her, cradling the hot cup in my hands and trying not to look at Bo, and failing. She was beautiful in her nurses uniform, her hair done up in the style of the era, and she radiated strength. I was completely drawn to her in this moment in a way that scared the shit out of me. She was exactly as I pictured her in this role a million years ago when I sat in a tiny room, hunched over a computer, banging this script out. Dreaming of finding a love like her.

I shook my head, snapping out of my haze when Effy tapped my arm. "Lauren? Elizabeth, Bo, and Gillian will be heading out to the barn for a few shots, would you like to join them?"

I nodded stupidly as Effy smirked at me, clearly having caught me in my fantasy moment. "Yes." I turned to wave at the camera crew when Gillian sauntered up to me, throwing an arm across my shoulders.

"You know I wish I could inspire the same reaction out of Bo that you do when you look at her." Gillian leaned forward, whispering against my ear. "You know she often asks about you when we are sitting about, going over lines, or standing in wardrobe."

I frowned, unconsciously leaning into Gillian out of a terrible habit I developed when we were together. "Gillian, don't."

She laughed, pulling me closer as we walked out of the tent and towards the barn. "You know I can't do anything you ask of me. Including staying away from you, but that girl." She waved a gloved hand towards Bo walking with Effy and Elizabeth. "Is your muse, and any intelligent idiot can see the way you two stare at each other like battling bulls in an arena. Something's brewing between you two and it's making me envious." Gillian smirked and winked at me.

I went to step away from Gillian when she held tighter. "Lauren, I adore you. I always have, always will, but I have a hunch. And my hunches are always right." She kissed my cheek and walked away, winking at me as she raced to catch up to Bo throwing an arm around the woman's shoulder.

I stopped walking, letting my boots sink into the bog and hold me for a moment. Why was this happening? Why after all these years of finding love to be a feeble notion, an unachievable notion, did the cosmos suddenly hold it out to me in the palm of its hand? I shook my head, casting the idea out. "It's all bullshit, I hope something, or someone can talk some sense into these hunches, notions and garbage about Bo and I. Make this thing between her and I disappear."

"I heard you talked to yourself, but who's to believe the tabloids?" A rich, smooth English accented voice came up behind me. I turned to come face to face with my lead actor. Wynn Edgar. A dashing sandy blonde with blue eyes that would make the Queen weep if she stared in them too long. He grinned at me, holding out his hand in a hearty greeting. "I'm Wynn, and I cannot thank you enough for this, Ms. Lewis. I will do right by you."

I grinned back, a sense of relief washing over me as my true choice for lead actor was on time and very professional. I took his hand, smiling at his firm handshake and quickly took him over to meet the rest of the cast.

What I didn't know, was Wynn was that something, someone, that I had wished for three seconds before he appeared behind me. `


	5. Chapter 5

**N: i don't even know what happened here. It just went where it wanted to. Anyway, read on. Updates will be slow as the holidays ruin lives where i work and i start work with my new editor this week, so things will be shifting towards books and when i have a moment, to this pile of nonsense. Here's hoping it makes sense!**

 **Also, if you need xmas gifts, or just want a fun new book. Head over to amazon and find me under Sydney Gibson! I have three lovely books that need homes this winter!**

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"Gillian, Bo, I'd like you both to meet Wynn." I smiled as Wynn's charisma flowed as he stepped forward, shaking each of the girl's hands, introducing himself. The girls both grinned uncontrollably at how handsome Wynn was. He had a mix of English boy next door mixed with the good looks that could set him next to any of the royals. He carried himself in a way that made everyone at ease, no ego, no expectations, just a desire to work and do his best. It was the reason why I chose him in the first place, he was a genuine professional like the rest of the cast.

"It's great to meet you both." He grinned at Gillian first. "Especially you, Gillian. I was such a admirer of your performance in Gates of Amber." He waved his hands around with excitement. "How you lost the Oscar that year, it will forever be a mystery!" Wynn clasped his hands together as Gillian gave him a smirk in agreement of her award robbery, rubbing them as the Scottish air began to nip into the old barn, he glanced at Bo. "And you, Ms. Dennis, may I take a quick moment to gush like a school boy nerd over your role as Samira. I spent many a late night in uni, watching reruns of your show. That show sits high up in the ranks of Star Trek, and you with Captain Kirk as the greatest scifi character in my opinion. Truly fantastic work!"

I looked over at Bo, her cheeks flushing a light pink as she smiled, biting her bottom lip. "Thank you. It's actually my pleasure to be working with you. I have been following your career, along with Gillian's, over the last year." She tipped her head down as Wynn stepped closer, grabbing her shoulder in a friendly manner. Causing a strange jolt of jealousy ripple through my body as she let out what sounded like a girlish sigh. I shook my head at my reaction, there wasn't a need for it, Wynn was handsome and Bo was a red blooded woman reacting to him. Yeah, that's what it was, nothing more.

"Bo, I have a grand feeling you and I will be getting on quite well." Wynn squeezed her shoulder, looking over at Gillian with a happy, humorous look. "Even if I lose your heart to this incredible lady here." He stepped back, turning to look at me. "Lauren, I've read the entire script, and Effy had me briefed while I was in the air. I can start now if you'd like."

I cleared my throat, looking up at Gillian who was smirking at me and shaking her head as she nodded in Bo's direction. I glared at her, our silent way of communicating through looks and facial expressions was active. We were having a full blown conversation with two looks and an eyebrow raise. A conversation that revolved around this stupid theory about Bo and I. "Um, we can Wynn, if you'd like. I was just doing set ups in the barn for lighting and sound. But, if you'd like to run a few lines with the girls, we can do that." I turned my head to call for Effy when she appeared, handing me a script that was already turned to a critical scene between the three. I took it, squinting at her. "Are you a mind reader?"

Effy smiled, handing another script to Wynn. "I might be, and we should discuss that one thing you are thinking about, and continue to deny that you are thinking about it." She moved to Bo and Gillian, gently guiding them to a few crates that had been placed by props. "Lauren? Would you like to direct our leads?"

I sucked in a slow breath, looking at the script as I stepped closer to the three actors, all looking at me for direction. "Let's start at the scene where David, that's you Wynn, is professing your feelings for Annie in front of Maggie. This will be the scene following the hectic battlefield triage scene." I tucked the script under my arm. "Do your best, emotions are high, tense after the rush of injured you've all dealt with." I waved to Gillian. "You are going to be the silent struggling witness, swallowing down your forbidden feelings growing for Annie."

Gillian nodded, glancing at the script before setting it down. I stepped towards Bo, meeting her eyes and hating the way the bore right to my heart. "Bo, you are also struggling. Struggling that David is this perfect RAF flyboy, fallen right from the movies you watched back home and into your life. Romancing you, treating you like a lady, but there's something in the pit of your stomach brewing. Brewing every time you look in the green eyes of Maggie and the way it makes you feel. Makes you feel free and yet like you're breaking every rule you've ever honored. I want to see the struggle, the push pull you feel being in the same room as these two."

I paused, watching a flicker of recognition float across those brown eyes. "I understand perfectly, Lauren." She held my eyes for a few seconds longer than necessary before smoothing out her uniform.

I took a step back to stand next to Effy, suddenly wanting to put a little bit more distance between Bo and I. "Whenever you're all ready, you can start Wynn."

* * *

Twenty minutes later and Effy let out a delightful sigh, leaning to whisper in my ear. "My God, Lauren, they're all perfect. This film is going to destroy the world in the best possible way."

I nodded, a soft smile on my face. I had just watched my script, my words, come to life in ways I had never imagined. Wynn had nailed it, tapping into the perfect tone and chemistry that fed Bo enough to tap into that deep hidden talent I always knew was there. That allowed Gillian to find her space, and she became Maggie through and through. I could actually feel, and see the turmoil in her eyes as she watched the love of her life fall into the arms of another. "I know, holy shit I know."

I waited until the last line of the scene was delivered by Gillian, and clapped my hands in excitement. "Perfect, absolutely perfect!" I went to grin when Bo rushed into Wynn's arms, hugging him tightly and grinning.

"You're incredible Wynn, way better than Austin was. I can't wait to work with you more." Her grin grew wider as he winked at her, even her cheeks flushed up again, along with that jolt of jealousy I felt when Wynn touched her and she responded. I felt a frown growing when Bo stepped out of Wynn's arms and gave Gillian a quick, much shorter, hug.

Effy's hand fell to the small of my back, pressing ever so gently in her way of pulling me back into the now. It was something she did whenever I was about to burrow into my cranky space. I nodded, glancing at her and plastered on a fakish smile. "Okay, I think you three are ahead of the game. Wynn, if you'd like you can stick around and soak up more of the set, or I can get the transport team to take you to the studio and get you set up in wardrobe. We're all heading back at dusk to start blocking out the sets." I turned to say something to the two girls when Wynn's chipper voice broke in.

"I'd actually like to stay, get to know Bo a bit better as she is my leading lady." He grinned winking at Bo, making her do that lip biting smile again, making me want to suddenly fire him. He turned to look at me. "I like getting to know the people I work with it, it helps build genuine relationships onscreen."

I nodded with a smile. "Certainly." I turned to Effy, who was giving me that look. "Make sure the girls are on time, nothing interfering too much with the test shots." I waved absently. "I'm going over there, to the props crew. Talking about the fake blood color." I grumbled and went to walk away when I heard Bo ask Wynn a question about his flight over in a tone that was light, airy, and oh so very flirty.

I let out a harsh breath through my teeth and gave Effy a don't even, look before I slogged away from the barn, jamming my hands deep into the pockets of my coat.

"I smell an on set romance in the air." Gillian's low voice fell in step next to me. I looked at her sideways. "No."

She laughed, nudging me as she slogged up the hills with me. "No, you're correct. Nothing between you and that brunette that has moon pie eyes for you. You've shat on her enough that she's learned her lesson. I was talking about the dashing boy who is quite dashing. He even has me sighing like a little girl when he winks at me." She winked at me. "But I'm immune to his charms." Gillian nodded over her shoulder. "I've been on a million sets, been witness to a million on set romances, and what's happening over there is the beginning of a lovely little one. Could even end up in one of those awful celebrity marriages where they always talk about how they truly fell in love, pretending to be in love."

I clenched my jaw, stomping as hard as I could in sloppy, mossy mud. Gillian was pushing my buttons in the only way she knew how. "Gillian, stop. I'm here to work, not gossip like fools about bullshit set myths." I tucked my chin deeper into my scarf. "You also know I don't give a shit about what my actors do off set, as long as they do their job."

Gillian sighed, shaking her head. "You do realize you're about two shites away from completely destroying any chance you have with Bo? This devil may care, or don't care, attitude is horrible on you." She gently grabbed my elbow, forcing me to stop with a squish, and turned me to face her. "Lauren, get your head out of your ass, and pay attention."

I frowned, shaking my head. "All I need to pay attention to is making this movie, nothing more." I met Gillian's green eyes, glaring at me like an angry mother. "Nothing. More." I glanced over her shoulder at Bo grinning, and fawning over Wynn. "There's an awkward history between Bo and I. She's the reason why I'm so driven. Why I'm so closed off to anything but work." I sighed, closing my eyes. "She's the reason I can't."

Gillian let go of my arm. "You know this is the first time you've actually spoken about what's in that little heart of yours." She searched my eyes. "Come to dinner with me tonight, and tell me. Tell me why that girl is the reason you can't and I know it bleeds far deeper than the washed up television star who you wanted to prove wrong."

I felt my face go pale, and swallowed hard. "How, how did you know?"

Gillian rolled her eyes, smirking. "I can put two and three together. I remember one drunken night together that you rambled pint after pint about this one actress who destroyed you in the flick of a wrist. Dumping your script and a fangirl crush into the trash." She waved a hand towards Bo. "It's Bo, and I am certain that there's more to the story."

I turned away from Gillian, clenching my jaw tighter. "It's stupid, and pitiful, and." I paused, staring out at the hills in the far distance. "I should talk with the crew, I'll meet you for dinner at ten." And with that, I walked away from Gillian as fast as I could in the sucking mud.

There was more to the story, and I wasn't sure if I could own up to telling it to anyone.

* * *

XXX

"Do not try anything tonight, Gillian." I pointed at her with a glass half full of scotch. "I just need to not be me right now." I took a healthy sip of the delicious liquor. I did indeed have dinner with Gillian, at the pub closest to the small cottage she was staying in back in Nottingham. It was very friendly, old friends getting caught up in our lives, then I started drinking when I saw Bo walk in with Wynn, picking up carry out and looking very cozy as they did. A pint, turned into two, then I followed it up with a few shots of whiskey and the next thing I knew, I was sitting on the edge of Gillian's bed. My mind was sloshing around and I begged, prayed, she wouldn't ask me anything that would require me telling the truth. My intoxication would open the gates and she'd get the earful. More than that, I was worried my pants would mysteriously fall off around the woman and her sensual ways.

Gillian sat next to me on the bed, grinning at me as she took my glass and sipped from it. "I have no intentions, you're a sloppy lay when you're drunk. Remember that time at the Cannes film festival when you discovered limoncello?"

I frowned, flopping on my back on her bed, groaning and covering my eyes. "I still can't smell lemons without gagging." I sighed, letting my head spin in a comforting way. Taking me away from the day, and all the finger pointing I endured about Bo and I. "I'm already tired, Gilly, and it's only the beginning of production."

Gillian laid on her side, propping her head up as she stared at me. "Well, hiding from your emotions, denying them every chance you get, is exhausting." She took another sip. "So, are you going to tell me the more to the story that is you and Bo?"

I frowned, shaking my head. "No."

She leaned over closer, poking me in the one ticklish spot I had on my ribs, making me jolt and glare at her. "Don't, I'm drunk and I'll vomit on your duvet."

Gillian laughed, grabbing my arm and pulling me to sit up. "I know you're drunk. You picked up steam with fervor when you saw Bo and the boy wonder come into the pub." She let me lean on her as she threw a blanket around my shoulders. "Spill it Lewis. What is it about this Bo that has you acting like I've never seen you? What dreaded history is there that has you treating her like she stole your dog, your pickup truck, and all the other things American country singers croon over."

I huffed, tugging at the corner of the blanket and leaning deeper into Gillian's warmth. I half debated trying to take her pants off to avoid having this conversation, but it wouldn't work. Gillian was a force to be reckoned with on a multitude of levels, I wouldn't succeed. I turned to look at her. "You promise never to tell anyone? Not even your mother, or Effy?"

The redhead grinned, making the cross my heart motion over her chest. "On the Queens life."

I frowned. "What is it with you English and your unnatural love of the queen? It's weird." I winced when Gillian poked me again. "Fine, I believe you." I sucked in a slow breath. "You know the basic story of me going to the convention, meeting Bo, pouring my heart out, and then having her throw the script out. Turning me into the evil villain I am today." I waved Gillian off before she could comment. "Don't interrupt or I'll never finish." I wrapped the blanket tighter around me as I reached for the glass of scotch. "Four years ago, when I was thrust into the spotlight, I was brought in by Spielberg to learn the auditioning process. He was casting for a film and had done an open call, bringing the entire world to his offices. He asked me to sit in on a few so I could take notes on how to do my own casting calls." I paused, taking a very large sip from the glass. "All day, I sat through audition after audition. Incredible to down right atrocious. I learned a lot, took notes and eventually started asking personal questions of each actor, to see if they knew when to be honest, and if they could be honest."

I scooted to the edge of the bed, leaning forward on my elbows. "Well, Bo Dennis walked into the room around the eighth hour, she had just fallen into the obsolete, and had come to the open call on her own. No agent, no pr firm, nothing. Just her walking in and taking a chance like the thousands around her." I felt Gillian's hand fall to my back, comforting me. "I was wearing a hat, glasses and looked nothing like I do now. I was still a scrub not used to the sudden attention of being an academy award winner, and Steven had told the actors I was just one of his assistants. No one paid any attention to me unless I spoke to them. No one recognized me, regardless that I had just won the award four months prior and my next project had been green-lit by Spielberg."

Gillian chuckled. "I hate to say it, my love, but when you're the cruddy penny sitting next to the shiny gold bar, no one would give you a second look. Not even I." She winked at me. "It actually took me three looks to fall for you in my audition."

I sighed, resting my wobbly head on Gillian's shoulder. "Thanks, I guess." I closed my eyes, the booze taking hold and making it easier to let out the past. "Bo read for me and Steven, did quite well, but you could tell she was still used to television production, being fed lines off camera. Steven asked her a few questions, about her resume, her life, and how she connected to the character in the script. She answered them with utter professionalism, but it just wasn't enough. Steven turned it over to me to ask my own questions. So, I asked her, what her biggest regret was, had she ever been in love at first sight, and if there was one thing she could go back in time and do, what would it be?"

Gillian let out a slow whistle. "You still harboured harsh feelings for her, and why the love at first sight question? That's an odd one to ask, especially if this was for that weird science fiction movie he did."

I kept my eyes closed, remembering the way Bo looked at me, the way she made eye contact and her eyes flickered with the tiniest sense of recognition right before she answered my question. The way she lit something deep inside of me when she spoke. "It was weird, and yes I still was a shit about the convention. Still angry about it, but I wanted to know." I sighed softly, wanting so desperately to pass out.

 _"_ _Have I ever been in love at first sight? No, never, almost, I think so. It's something that escapes me, I'm very protective of my heart, cautious. You have to be when you're in this business." Bo looked between Steven and I, before making hard eye contact again. "My biggest regret would have to be ignoring something I felt when I met someone, a stranger a handful of years ago at the height of my cult show fame. They were kind, treated me with respect and I felt like I had known them my entire life when we shook hands. But, I was caught up in the fame and was too focused on my ego. I ignored the feeling they gave me when we touched, and was a jerk when they gave me a unique gift that I wish I could go back in time and retrieve, since I cannot remember what it was, only that it was incredibly important to that person." Bo paused, looking down at her hands clasped in her lap. "I guess if I could go back in time, I would go back to that particular day, take myself out of my ego and pay attention to that one person. Because looking back, it was probably the closest I ever came to being in love at first sight. It's hard to explain, but I do regret not listening to my heart when it was speaking, allowing my selfish need for fame to cast it to the side." She smiled tightly, looking back at Steven. "All I know is I hurt them, and I can see it when I look in their eyes as I run across them here and there. There's a strange broken sadness, and it's because of me."_

"Holy shite! she knows who you are! She was talking about you, right to your disguised face." Gillian stood up from the bed quickly, letting fall on my side. I opened one eye, watching her pace and point a finger at me. "That bollocks story about the convention is bollocks. You've not been telling the truth about that day." She folded her arms across her chest and glared at me. "Spill it, you felt the same god damn thing she did and it freak you out, so you cut it out and made her the dastardly villain."

I clenched my jaw as my eyes welled up, and nodded. "What was I supposed to do? I had a girlfriend at the time, one I loved." I rolled over onto my back. "Yes, Bo knows who I am, I think. I don't know how to dig into her mind right now, too busy trying to ignore the feelings that are still there from that day when I met her." I rolled my head to look at the pacing redhead. "I did feel the same thing she did when we shook hands, it was like a scene out of a movie. Cliche intended, where our eyes met, our hands met, and boom! This feeling of wanting to throw up, laugh hysterically, and all that bollocks I write, happened. It was weird as hell, intense and it caught us both off guard to the point her handler had to usher us to hurry up, that there was a line behind me." I felt a stray tear roll down my cheek. "The part where I ran to the green room to find her, was because she asked me to come and find her, to talk about the script I handed her and if I could show her around the city afterwards." I sniffled. "After that audition, I sat in front of my computer night after night, Bo's contact information staring at me in an email, just begging for me to reach out to her and talk to her. Find out the truth, and if our connection was still there. But, I never did. Fear is a powerful beast when it's wrapped around past pain."

Gillian paused, running her hands through her hair. "This is a fucking script of its own. And here we all thought the washed up television star was a proper twat, but no. It's this fucking script, isn't it?" She knelt down in front of the bed. "It's your way of going back in time and fixing that day."

I nodded slowly, wiping my cheeks with the back of my hand. "Yeah. That and it's my grandparents story, the story my grandmother wanted me to find in love." I let out a shaky breath. "Gillian, she broke my heart when she laughed with the other cast members. Mumbling about stupid fans always wanting to get to close, it hurt deeply, because god did I believe it when I looked in her eyes. The same thing I see when she looks at me now." I curled up into the blanket, the booze making the tears flow freely. "I can't now. I can't tell her, I can't follow through on my feelings that are confusing me, my fear that history will repeat itself and she'll break my heart again."

"So, you treat her like shit, push her away and allow her to possibly traipse about into the arms of that handsome boy? Why in the world did you give her the role if you just intended to torture yourself, Lauren?" Gillian moved to lay next to me, letting me roll into her arms and hug me.

"Because I'm clearly stupid." I buried my face into her shoulder. "And you know how I get when I'm working. I keep everyone away, and maybe it's better that she and I hate each other. I don't know, Gillian. I'm drunk, crying, and have no idea if I have it in me to let her in. Maybe I hate her too much to love her." I was getting sleepier the more I cried, my body letting the booze take over and push me into a deep sleep, take me away from the emotions I was flooding myself. "She's the reason why I couldn't with you."

I heard Gillian sigh, and squeeze me harder. "Well, then. At least she's better looking than me." I felt a soft kiss land to the top of my head, and Gillian whisper as I finally drifted off. "We need to get you to the point of can with Bo, I can't let you be that stupid to let your one true piss off into the sunset."

I passed out, mumbling about how she knew exactly how stupid I could be. Stupid and stubborn.


	6. Chapter 6

**N: again, i dont know what's happening other than poop is about to hit the fan. Who know what will happen next, all i know is i need to go to bed. So read on and enjoy this if it makes sense, next up, the fight and misunderstandings galore. Read, review, and to the one who pointed out i spelled Blitzkrieg wrong, i know, but when you're in recovery, the little things get left behind.**

* * *

Peeling my eyes open, the first thing I saw was a mane of red hair, cascading all over a white pillow.

"Shit." I whispered the curse out, my voice beyond raspy. It usually was raspy after a night of hard, excessive drinking. I went to roll over, sit up, but the pounding in my head prevented any further movement. "Shit." I covered my eyes, and sank back into the bed, desperately searching my memory. Did I? Did we?

Before I could latch onto one last coherent thought, the bed shift and Gillian sat up, looking over at me with a smile. "We didn't, you can stop cursing in my bed now. You know I abhor dirty talk in bed." She winked at me as she got up out of bed. "Time to get up, we need to be at the studio in two hours."

I swallowed hard, my stomach swirling violently. "What did I drink last night?"

Gillian slipped on a robe, making me frown slightly. Regardless of my feelings, or lack of, Gillian was gorgeous and her sleepwear of an old t-shirt and tiny panties, wasn't a horrible sight. "Everything you could get your hands on." She pulled the robe tighter, waggling a finger at me. "No more looking, you have your heart set on someone else, I won't stand in the way. No matter how hard you try."

I groaned again, rolling over onto my side, smashing my face into the pillow. "Shit. I told you everything."

"You certainly did." She waltzed over to my side of the bed, gently tugging the pillow free to hand me a aspirin and a glass of water. "Take this, and I'll get you into the shower." She watched me with bright green eyes as I did as I was told. Struggling to get up, my head still swimming. I had a rush of embarrassment roll over me. I had never, ever confronted my past with Bo, let alone share it with anyone I cared about, let alone the one woman I had come the closest to loving.

"Gillian, you can't…."

She pressed her palm against my cheek, smiling softly. "I won't. Not a soul, but I will be behind you. Pushing, prodding, and pulling you if need be. If she's your one true forever, then let's prove it to her and yourself, Lauren." She leaned over kissing me softly on the forehead. "Now, up you get." She took my hand and yanked me up. "Sober up in the shower while I get ready. I'll have the driver stop for coffee and those greasy fast food sandwiches you adore."

I groaned as I was pulled from the warmth of the bed, finding my feet to still be wobbly. I was extremely hungover and this was not good. Today was going to be a long, hard day in the studio with on set rehearsals. Why did I do this to myself? All of it. Maybe I could still back out of this and shelve the film for another five years.

Gillian tapped my forehead. "Shut it down, Lauren and go." She walked me to the bathroom, shoving me and gently closing the door behind me.

I sighed, refused to look in the mirror and started the shower. When the steam was thick enough, I climbed in and let the hot water force me to sweat out the rest of the booze. I leaned against the shower tile, trying to force back down the raw feelings I had brought up. The feelings for Bo. I had to, it would be the only way I could stand to work with her for the next three to four months.

I couldn't look at her anything more than an actor. Nothing more.

* * *

XXXX

"Steady. Steady." Gillian whispered holding onto my elbow, guiding me down the hall to the large warehouse where the first set had been completed. The primary one where most of the film would be shot, the war hospital. I was walking, well wobbling, clutching a massive cup of black coffee and praying the greasy sandwich Gillian had me eat, would remain in my stomach. I had a pounding headache, and wore sunglasses to keep any harsh light far, far away from my eyes.

"Steady yourself." I frowned, trying to move away from Gillian as all the actors came into view. I didn't need any gossip to start the day. I clenched my jaw as my body wasn't happy with me.

The red head chuckled, and patted my back. "Feisty Lauren is my favorite. This is going to be a great day, here's hoping no one quits when you move from feisty to down right bitchy." She winked, grabbing my elbow as I stumbled over something I didn't see, the sunglasses making the entire warehouse very dark.

I turned to glare at her, knowing she would feel it when I heard Effy's voice. "Good morning, ladies! I was about to send out the search party." I whipped my head around to shoot her a glare, cursing when it hurt to do so. She had one eyebrow raised, looking between Gillian and I, and the current disheveled state I was in. Effy walked over to me, nodding at Gillian as she took over guiding me. Gillian wished her good luck and rushed over to meet with Alan and Karen. "Dare I even ask?"

I grumbled. "Nothing for you to worry about." I sipped from the coffee as we walked to the set. I smiled as best as I could at Alan, Karen and Elizabeth all chatting with Gillian. They all looked amazing in their wardrobe and makeup, as if they had fallen out of a time machine. I looked around the set, marveling at the work done from my notes and half scribbles. "This is perfect, the build team did an amazing job." I stared at the minute details of the main ward, catching magazines, books, pictures, and tiny personal knick knacks that fit the time, and the atmosphere I was looking for.

"They did indeed." Effy walked with me, flipping open her notepad. "I know you're hungover, but I must go over the schedule with you." She scribbled with a pen. "But I'm moving lunch up an hour earlier, maybe more depending on how well you fair in the first few hours."

I cast the woman a dirty look. "I'm not hungover, I'm just very tired." I cleared my throat as my stomach gurgled and bubbled. I pressed a hand against it, silently telling it to be quiet.

Effy grinned. "If that's what you Americans choose to call it." She handed me the notepad, pointing out the very full schedule. "This outlines the day. Rehearsals for a few hours, then a break. The female cast comes back and we start blocking out the first portion you wanted to start shooting next week, while the male cast go learning to blow stuff up."

I sighed, wishing I could go blow stuff up, and read over the notes. I nodded when I was satisfied with the first half the day, and looked up, hearing Bo's laugh and the way it fluttered all the way down into my stomach and back up around my heart. I turned, looking over my shoulder to see her and Wynn walking onto set, arm in arm. They looked exactly like fresh faced lovers, glowing from a night spent behind closed doors. "They're late." My tone was filled with angry venom. I hated the way Bo clung to Wynn, it made that jealous feeling percolate, and those raw feelings I exposed, burn.

Effy looked in the same direction I was. "Actually, they were early. Both arriving at the same time. An hour before everyone else, running over lines and giggling like they are now." She looked at me, still glaring at the closeness of Bo and her new, whatever he was. "Bo found me and asked where you were, making an excuse up about her makeup. I told her you were on your way, running late like directors do." Effy bent closer to me. "Whatever it is between you two, figure it out, I won't be caught in the middle, because if I am, I will lock you two into a room and make you fight it out. She pines after you like a broken hearted puppy."

I went to make a shitty comment, when Bo's eyes met mine. Her smile faltering, and her eyes sparking with a strange sadness. She smiled tightly, and went to walk over to me, when Wynn scooped her up into a hug. I watched as her eyes came back to life, a bright grin covering her face, and a laugh that made my heart skip burst out of her. The jealousy reared its ugly head and I had a hard time swallowing it down. I grabbed Effy's arm. "Get Gillian, please. Tell her I need to…um…talk to her about her…"

"Her medical training, yes of course." Effy patted my hand, and walked over to Gillian. I watched as she bent over, whispering in her ear. Gillian's head spun around, she smiled at me and came over to me.

I turned my back to the cast, fighting the tears as I heard Gillian's voice. "Lauren."

I shook my head, setting down the large coffee so I could fold my arms across my chest and squeeze out the feeling choking me. "Gilly, just stand next to me. I've opened a wound and have no idea how to close it." I nodded to where Bo and Wynn were, laughing, flirting, falling in love. "I know I can't ask you for anything, she's the reason I broke your heart." I glanced at the red head. "But you were the only one I ever trusted, fully. Tell me, how do I push this down?"

Gillian stepped closer, turning her back to the rest and moving her hand around like she was commenting on the set. "I can't tell you what to do, Lauren. But you need to pull it together. This is your dream, the film you've talked about since I met you." She glanced over at me, frowning as she caught the single tear roll out from underneath the sunglasses. "Dammit Lauren, don't. You know I cry when you cry." She threw an arm around me, jostling me like an old friend. "I understand the pain, I understand you, Lauren. But I can't tell you what to do, that's up to you." Gillian bent closer, whispering. "I just hope you choose with your heart."

She stepped away, patting me hard on the back. "I'll always be here for you, Lauren. Now, let's go make a movie."

I nodded and turned around after wiping my cheeks and composing myself. I looked up, catching Bo staring at Gillian and I in a curious way. I sucked in a slow breath, nodding again. "Thank you Gillian." I pulled off my sunglasses and gave her one of our silent looks that only she would understand what I was saying.

The red head winked at me, and walked away. I tucked the sunglasses in the top of my t-shirt and went to walk over to Effy and get the day started when I looked over to Bo and Wynn. Wynn was sitting next to Bo, very closely, and whispering in her ear. Whatever it was he said, had her blushing and laughing. The look of love radiant in her eyes.

I clenched my jaw. It was that look that slammed the hammer down onto those exposed feelings I let free last night. Shoving them deep into the pit where they had sat for years. It was that look that made my decision, I would let Bo go and focus on the film, she would just be my actor. When it was done, we would both go our separate ways, and I would move on.

I plastered on my fake, professional smile and walked to Effy, calling the cast to attention.

I had a film to make, I didn't have time for love.

* * *

 **Two months later.**

"Cut!" I shouted over the heavy rain beating down on the tent I hovered under. The entire film crew was back up at the farm in Scotland, filming an outdoor scene. It had decided to rain that day, and I went with it. Feeling the rain would add to the emotional impact to the scene where David and Annie fight over Gillian, and Annie runs away. Right into the arms of Maggie, where they share their first kiss, which was schedule to shoot tomorrow.

The rain had done it's job, heightening the actors emotions to the verge of explosive since it was so damn cold and muddy. I felt bad, and made sure breaks were given regularly, and I gave them extra time in the heat tents as I set up shots. I was freezing and drenched myself, standing out in the rain many times with the cameraman to make sure the blocking was right.

I smiled as the cast and crew all rushed into a heat tent. I slowly stepped out into the rain, slogging over to barn, thinking about the next scene we had planned for the day. It was a singular shoot with primarily Bo, a scene that would have a narration done in ADR after principal photography was done.

Overall, I had succeeded in shoving Bo away. She had tried for a few days after my mini meltdown, to talk to me, but I held strong. Keeping it professional and not letting her in anywhere. She soon got frustrated and would only engage with me when it was necessary. She got along with the rest of the cast amazingly, including Gillian, who would talk to me at night in my cottage, as friends only, about how I needed to stop being a shite, and at least be friends with the girl. I would refuse, or fake promise Gillian I would try, but in reality I was done. Bo and Wynn had gotten very close, and the gossip was thick about their romance. Calling it one that would put Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward to shame. I told people I didn't care as long as it didn't affect the film, they could do whatever they wanted in their off time. Get married for all I cared.

Effy was the only one who wouldn't give up. She would call me out on being too hard on Bo at times, or being an asshole when Wynn and her, were in a scene together and getting too close while I was readjusting shots. Effy would lean over and tell me my jealousy was showing, I would tell her that her pink slip was showing, and we would glare at each other for a second, then move on.

Bo was at four arms length from me, and that's where she needed to stay. No matter how beautiful she looked in the dailies, the way she portrayed Annie that had me falling in more in love with her, and no matter the intense looks she would give when I caught her staring my way. She was over there, and I was over here, an imaginary ocean filled with no feelings for her, between us.

I climbed into the barn, my boots scraping against the old wood floors as the rain pounding on the roof like a set of drums. I looked around, the lighting would be perfect in an hour and this would be perfect for the scene. I stood in the middle of the barn, my hands jammed into the pockets of my soaked coat and let my thoughts drift towards what music would pair well with this scene.

"Lauren? The camera crew needs an extra twenty minutes to change equipment, and boots." Effy rushed in, bundled up in her own massive raincoat, notepad in hand. "I'm sending Alan and Karen home for the day. Their shots were completed by the second camera crew. Wynn and Gillian are on standby since you have them up after this next shot, and Bo. Bo is…"

"Right here, EFfy." The sound of Bo's voice had us both turning our heads at the same time. Bo still looked incredible even if she was frozen to the bone. She had changed into a dry costume, her hair and makeup redone. She grinned at Effy and smiled softly at me. "Tina sent me up here, thought I was going to be late for my next scene."

Effy grinned back. "You're early. The camera crew is running behind." She glanced at me, probably noticing my jaw twitching like it did whenever Bo was around. My stupid way to control my feelings. "I will go check on them, get them up here quicker." She walked past Bo. "Is there anything I can get you?"

Bo shrugged, grinning. "Just make it stop raining, and maybe a hot cup of coffee?"

Effy winked at her. "You got it." She glanced over her shoulder at me. "I'll get your usual cherry coke, just wait here and don't disappear on me. I'm not trudging any more than I have to in this forsaken rain."

I smiled tightly and turned back around to look up at the rig I had set up to do an overhead shot, wondering if I should move it to the opposite end to catch the light coming through the cracks in the old slats of the barn.

"This film is beautiful, Lauren." Bo spoke softly, as if she was afraid to speak. "Wynn and I watched some of the dailies with Karen this morning, your work is incredible. The camera movements, the lighting, it all makes sense now why you are so particular."

I half paid attention, pretending to focus more on an old rusty nail poking out than Bo talking. "It needs more work, but post production will tighten a few things up. Things I'm not happy about." I turned and moved towards the far wall of the barn, avoiding looking at Bo.

"You have nothing to worry about. We all love working with you, even in the pouring rain and sucking mud of Scotland." Bo's tone grew more confident. "This love story, it's touching all of us. It's definitely leaving an impression on me, Lauren."

I glanced at her. "It should, you're the lead of the film. If you don't believe, the audience won't." I swallowed hard. "And I imagine it's improved your personal life." I pushed the words out harder than I intended, but I was a petty person and jealousy often reared its power around me, especially when Bo was around me too.

Bo scrunched her forehead up. "What does that mean?"

I shrugged, running a hand over rough wood. "The set gossip. It's ripe right now about you and Wynn." I shrugged again. "I honestly don't care, you two show up and do your work, after that is no business of mine."

Bo laughed with a touch of anger, tipping her head down. "You do clearly care, Lauren. Bringing it up shows you care." She glanced at me, her brown eyes boring right into mine. "And here I thought you could give two shits about me, the way you interact with me." Her tone was firm, bordering on angry. A side of Bo I had never seen before, and it was intriguing. I had only endured the diva side, the bashful embarrassed side, and the disgustingly happy side I observed from afar as she fawned over her new boyfriend.

"You're my actor, Bo. I interact with you like a director should." I turned back to the old wood, praying that it would suddenly give way and collapse on me. I did not want a sudden confrontation about feelings right now.

"Bullshit." Bo spat the word out, moving closer to me. "You treat me like I'm a nuisance off camera, like I'm diseased and you're afraid to be near me, or around me for more than thirty seconds. And yet, you and Gillian are closer and closer every day. Should I tell you the gossip about you two? How the entire crew, some who've worked on the last movie with you and her, are blithering about what happens in your bedroom with that fiery sex pot? Never mind the fact that you both stumble onto set together, looking haggard and worn out. Telling all of us things I'd rather never know about." Bo was speaking quickly, each word coming out harder than the last. "It's not exactly my favorite to see you and her, first thing in the morning." She mumbled the last part.

I stared at her, trying so hard not to show my reaction to the last few things she spoke, reigniting those stupid feelings for her I had buried. "If you're tired, I can give you a few more minutes before this next scene."

Bo clenched her jaw stepping hard towards me. "Stop this, Lauren. Stop this fucking distant behavior. I'm the only one you treat like this, and I'm going to ask right now. Why? Why are you treating me like this? Is it because of that stupid convention all those years ago?" She stared in my eyes, searching if I remembered as much as she did. The part is shared with Gillian that drunken night. She hesitated for a second. "That I didn't mean it?" Her tone softened ever so slightly as her brown eyes turned glassy. "I made a horrible mistake that day."

I felt my heart lurch up into my throat. I felt my will melting as I stared into brown eyes that were begging for forgiveness, hope. "Bo."

Just then the camera crew trudged into the barn, dropping equipment around Bo and I, starting to set up. I stepped away to let them work, Bo followed me with the same intention. She stood next to me, still looking at me. "Lauren, look at me."

"Bo, I think this conversation is over. We have work to do." I went to take another step away, when I felt her hand grab my wrist, stilling me. Her hand was impossibly warm in this frozen barn. It worked, however, and I turned to look at the brunette.

She swallowed hard. "Years ago, I went on an open casting call for a Spielberg movie. It was just him and one of his assistants, and I was petrified to be in front of such a legend." She cleared her throat, her eyes welling up with tears. "Then I recognized the assistant when she asked me a few unique questions. Unique questions that needed my true answers."

I bit the inside of my mouth as my heart forced itself further up into my throat. "Bo."

She shook her head, smiling softly. "I knew it was you, the second I looked into your eyes. Everything about you changed, not your eyes. Not your beautiful, loving brown eyes. The ones that caught me the first time we met, and what they made me feel." She turned to the sound of Effy hollering at a few crew members as she made a beeline towards us. Bo's hand left my wrist, allowing the cold air to singe the bare skin. Bo let out a shaky breath, looking at me one last time as she spoke. "I meant it, Lauren. I meant it then, and do now. You were my almost, the only almost I ever had, and will have." She cleared her voice. "But if you think I've moved on, I haven't, but I will, now that I've said what I think I have to, to let you go. I see how much you and Gillian love each other. I won't stand in the way of your happiness, now that you've finally found it." One single tear slipped free, Bo wiping it away before it ruined her makeup. "I regret I've hurt you, Lauren." She quickly moved away and towards the makeup girl who appeared to double check everything was perfect for the next shot.

All I did was stand and stare at the back of Bo, utterly frozen. I felt like I had been thrown into a spin cycle and was kicked out of the washer. My legs trembled, my heart pounded and my stomach twisted. Bo had caught me off guard, and scared the shit out of me. She knew, she had always known and allowed me to treat her like I had been. It was like I was the stupid mean boy on the playground who always hit her to cover up the feelings I had for her. And she took it, she took all of my sucker punches like a champ, hoping that I'd finally give up and kiss her under the swings, and ask her to be my girlfriend.

And all I did was sucker punch her to the point of giving up. I went to go over to her, when Effy popped into my direct view. "Lauren, crew is ready to go in five. We need to hurry to catch this light, and it just stopped raining, so the sound crew is eager to move."

I nodded absently, waiting for Bo to turn around and catch me looking at her. Which she did, but this time there was no bashful smile, pink cheeks, or eyes filled with hidden secrets. There was just sadness and the look of finally letting go.

"No." I rasped the words out, I was beyond confused and had been for months. But seeing that I had finally gotten my morbid wish, I suddenly didn't want it. I suddenly wanted Bo, I wanted to fight for Bo. Prove Effy and Gillian they were right from the get go.

"No to the sound crew? Or no to what, Lauren?" Effy tilted her head at me until I finally looked down at her. That's when she cocked an eyebrow. Shaking her head and shoving the script into my heads. "Realized it finally, didn't you. Realized it too late. It's a good thing your scripts aren't as predictable as you are, Lauren, or none of us would have jobs." She gently grabbed my elbow, moving to where I was needed. "You need to find Gillian after this scene, she has something she needs to tell you. And it's in regards to Bo and her new beau." Effy glared at me. "You sat too long on the pot, Lauren. Wynn moved in on your lady."

I shook my head. "No, she just…"

Effy smiled tightly. "Call it Bo's last stand. Wynn asked her to go away with him next week for our break. He asked our resident sex pot how to romance a lady, Gillian almost choked on her coffee, and sent me a text to find you. But I found you here, arguing with Bo."

"You heard everything?" I felt the overwhelming need to throw up strike.

"I did. You're such an arsehole, Lauren. You've pissed it all way." She handed me a phone. "Gillian has been messaging you, but you left your phone in your trailer."

I took it with shaking hands and opened the thread of messages.

 _-Wynn just asked me how to romance Bo. Inquiring about tips I might have used on you. –_

 _-He's smitten. She's reluctant by what he's telling me. –_

 _-Oh Christ, he just asked if I think if there's something weird between you and Bo. Appears she rants about you a lot when they're on "dates"-_

 _-God dammit Lauren, Bo is coming your way to talk to you. I fucking let it slip about you working with Spielberg on that movie she auditioned for. Her eyes clicked with recognition and she rushed out of the makeup trailer to find you, wee Wynn following her like a sad pup until I started on about Tom Cruise at the Oscars. Enraptured is not the word to describe this child's adoration for him-_

 _-Lauren, please don't tell me you did something stupid. You're silence tells me otherwise.-_

 _-I'm coming to find you. You did something stupid, I can smell it over the cow shit in the air-_

I glanced up after reading the last one to catch Gillian standing at the far edge of the barn, bundle up in her coat, hood up and shaking her head as she nodded to Bo. She already knew, she already knew what had happened. She could tell by the look on my face and the way Bo glared at her, fighting the urge to burst into tears and punch Gillian in the face.

I let out a slow, shaky breath, and handed Effy my phone. "Let's shoot this scene." I tried hard to keep a firm tone, but was failing. "Then call it a wrap for the day, everyone has endured enough cold for one day."

"I agree. Especially your lead actress." Effy's tone had a bite to it.

I wouldn't look at my assistant. I would only look at Bo, scraping the bottom of my mind for any clues on how the hell I would fix this, if I could fix this before I lost Bo forever.


	7. Chapter 7

**N: someone mentioned being curious about the two month gap. Bascially, Lauren was a jerk to Bo in jerky little ways, and Bo would confide in Wynn and that made him fall for her. There really wasn't much to embellish on at the point i was writing, and felt it better that Bo just drops a big ole bomb just when Lauren is all business is normal here. Anyway, read on this mess. The next chapter will be them talking, and stuff. Read on and enjoy!**

 **Also, you'll notice i shifted POV's...it might not happen to often, here and there. depending on how the mood strikes.**

* * *

 **The Next morning.**

I was buried under a mountain of blankets, sleeping hard in a cocoon of warmth. The day before had run into a long night, and by the time I got home, I was frozen, exhausted and collapsed into bed. Falling into a deep sleep by the time I pulled the covers over my head.

I had heard my phone ring, followed by a few knocks on the front door. But I wasn't getting up. I was on the verge of wallowing in self-pity as I found no way out of this mess I created with Bo. Bo who had run off the set the second I called it a wrap for the day, and I couldn't find her. The last anyone saw of her, was attached to Wynn's arm as he escorted her to the transportation van. I debated calling her from Effy's phone, however childish that would be of me, but was stopped by Gillian telling me to sleep on it and deal with it in the morning.

"Jesus Lauren, it's rather critical that you answer the phone, or the door, when we have a schedule to keep." Effy rushed into my bedroom, bringing in the cold air soaked into her coat. "Get up, everything has been shifted around. The entire schedule has been switched with our after break day one schedule. We have a heavy day of SFX and explosions."

I pulled the down comforter down just far enough to peek one eye out at my assistant. "What? And are you really in my closet?"

Effy ignored me as she started pulling clothing down and tossing it on the end of the bed. "You heard me. We have to be at the set in an hour and a half, the rest of the cast is scrambling, it was most of their day off." She held up a ragged, yet beloved, concert shirt of mine. Frowning before tucking it back into the shelves, picking up a cleaner looking button down.

I sat up, clutching to the comforter. "We're supposed to do the first kiss scene between Maggie and Annie today. It's primarily a whole day of shooting with Gillian and Bo." I frowned at the way saying her name made my stomach twist.

Effy moved to the end of the bed, crossing her arms as she glared at me. "Bo called in sick. A terrible cold brought on by the last weeks dreadful weather. The set doctor checked her out, she's on bed rest for the next few days. Poor girl has no voice and looks as grey as my mother's Christmas roast chicken."

The way Effy glared at me, it made me feel this was my fault. I also felt my heart wobble in my chest. "Is she okay?"

Effy sighed, dropping her arms. "Yes, she sounds like hell, but like I said. She'll be back at it after our break." She then walked to my bathroom, starting up the shower. "I'm not surprised, Lauren. The girl has been exhausted. Working endless hours with the rest of us, slogging in the rain and cold, then having to deal with you. No wonder her body is punishing her."

I swung my legs out of the bed, and stood up. "Effy. Please don't rake me over the coals. I tried to find her last night, but she ran off with her boyfriend." I cringed, remembering clearly the conversation Bo and I had. The things she said. "I don't know what to do, I've made such a mess."

"Then like any mess, you clean it up. Don't cry over spilt milk unless its curdled, Lauren. You haven't curdled Bo's feelings for you, completely." She leaned against the doorframe to my bathroom, looking me over. She suddenly smiled, pushing off the doorframe to walk over to me. "Since the schedule change has thrown us all in a tizzy, and it's our last day before break. I think we will end a few hours early. We're already ahead of schedule, we can spare an hour or two."

Shuffling towards the bathroom, I kept my head down. "I don't really want to go out for drinks with the cast tonight. I need to focus on fixing this."

Effy threw her arm around me, guiding me into the bathroom. "You'll be too busy making a special delivery to have drinks with us tonight. I've already have a plan and it's better than locking you two in a room to verbally duke it out."

I tried to turn in her grasp, confused at what she was suggesting, when I was rudely shoved into the bathroom. "Shower Lauren, before I call in the big guns. Big guns with red hair and excellent knowledge of all your physical weak points." Effy grinned, winking at me. "Trust me, Lauren. I've yet to steer you aground."

* * *

 **XXX (Bo)**

I was miserable, achy, and every time I coughed, it felt like a rib was going to break. The doctor had diagnosed me with a mild case of bronchitis and a nasty cold virus that had moved around the crew as we spend day after day in the rain. I was miserable because I had to take the day off, calling Effy at the crack of dawn to tell her I wasn't going to make it, let alone get out of bed to pee. She immediately sent the doctor over and here I was now. Sitting in front of the fireplace in the house the studio provided me, a house four times bigger than my cruddy apartment back in California, debating on calling Wynn back just so he could bring me soup and other supplies I had neglect to get over the last week. But I couldn't bring myself to do it, the poor guy had been calling incessantly when I messaged him that I wasn't going to the set today. I also messaged Gillian, making a joke that as much as I'd like to kiss her, she wouldn't want this nasty illness. She messaged back with kindness, and it made it that much harder for me to hate her.

I coughed, wincing and burying my face into the giant quilt I found in a closet. It wasn't that I actually hated Gillian, she was truly a very kind, incredible person, I just hated her for her ability to be close to Lauren. Their relationship, and the way she was able to make Lauren smile, when all I could do was make the blonde do was scowl, or stare at me with indifference.

Then there was Lauren. Lauren Lewis. The shy girl who shuffled awkwardly in front of me at the stupid convention, the shy girl who left such an impression on me, that I spontaneously asked her to dinner that night. I didn't want the others to know what I was doing, for they would probably follow the poor girl to get to me. So, I slipped her a note asking her to find me in the green room later and I would give her my number, my hotel information, and get to know this woman that sent shockwaves through my body when I shook her hand.

But then I was a stupid ass when I met up with the rest of the cast. My male costar making fun of me for taking the script from Lauren, then the rest joined in. Perhaps it was meant to be in jest, but I was at the end of my rope with the overwhelming fame I was sucked into. I did something stupid, having no idea Lauren was watching, and threw the script out. When Lauren didn't come to the green room that day, or the rest of the days of the convention, I was sad. Thinking she had gotten scared, or put off by my boldness. I never forgot her though, I went to every convention after, hoping to see her standing in line. But it never happened, and soon my star started to dim.

Then one day, Lauren popped up on my TV during award seasons. Golden Globes, Oscars, SAG, she was there. She had changed, grown more confident in her body, and in herself, but I knew it was her. Those brown eyes, it would always be her eyes that I remembered. The way they looked at me as if I was a person, not an object, not a fictional character, but a real person. The way she looked at me with pure adoration, the adoration that comes with slowly falling for a stranger. I absorbed everything I could about Lauren. Reading her interviews, going to her movies, and watching all of the stupid entertainment shows. Lauren was different, guarded, protective as fame exploded into her life, but her eyes always remained the same. Showing all of her true emotion, even as she spoke stone faced, or refused to answer personal questions.

I sniffled, chuckling as I remembered developing a bigger crush on the woman as I followed her, I knew it was something more, but I never believed in love at first sight, even if it was smacking me in the face. Even if this particular woman had an even more particular effect on me. I tried to reach out to her PR team through my agent, but I never got a response and soon I drifted into having no agent, no representation, and working at the public annex, teaching drama classes. Then came that open casting call. Walking into a room to meet with one of the greatest directors was nerve shattering to start with, but then I recognized her. Sitting hunched over, hiding under a hat and glasses, acting like no one important. But then she made the mistake of looking me in the eyes as she asked those questions. I knew it was her immediately, and grabbed the opportunity to tell her the truth. My mistake, and that it had taken me years, but I finally realized I had fallen in love with her at first sight. I wanted to pour my heart out to her in that room, but didn't.

I walked out of that audition knowing I didn't get it, but I waited outside. Waited for hours, hoping for a chance to catch Lauren. But like the first time we met, she never came out and I walked away, telling the universe that I got it. I had screwed up and now had to live with my consequences.

I was ecstatic my new agent called me and sent me Lauren's new script. I felt my luck was turning around when they loved my audition tape and sent me to England to read in front of her. I spent days plotting out what I was going to say to her, that it was the universe finally giving me that second chance to at least tell her that I never stopped thinking about her. That no matter how hard I tired, I could never recreate that spark she lit in me every time we were in the same room. Even as she tried to be the hard director, I could read her eyes, that was the one thing that would never change about her. She could be hard, cold, professional, and rude, but her eyes would always be kind and loving.

I coughed hard, tears squeezing out as I gasped for air and clutched at my ribs. I stood up slowly, my body revolting as I walked to the kitchen to check on the status of the medication the doctor prescribed. I needed that cough syrup stat, and the Tylenol to ease my aches. Making it to the kitchen I leaned on the small table for a moment to catch my breath. I looked up at the fridge where I had stuck a picture Alan had taken. He was a photographer in his spare time, and always taking picture. He gave me loads of them, using the excuse that my excitement of being back in film was making him feel young again. He gave me this one picture last week, it was one of Lauren and I standing together. She was giving me direction on whatever scene it was, and she was smiling because she was lost in her characters, her story. I was smiling in return, not because of the same reason Lauren was, but because Lauren was smiling and it was a sight that warmed my heart, gave me hope. I rolled my eyes, wiping my nose, I was beyond in love with the woman, but she couldn't see it.

For the last two months, I tried. I tried everything in the book I could think of to get a moment alone with her. Pour my heart out to her, and tell her everything. But she kept me at arm's length, acted distant and would only interact with me if it was for a scene. I couldn't stop myself from falling in love with her, she was incredible to watch, not only because she was beyond beautiful, it was her passion for making this film her best. She was invigorating be around, and when our hands brushed against each other, I still felt that buzz from the first time we touched. And it made me want to try harder, but she just shut me down harder and would walk in with Gillian first thing, and go home with her at the end of the day. Clearly in love with the sexy red head. I think that's what broke me last night and I spewed my heart out to the woman, I no longer cared to keep fighting if she wasn't even going to bother. My jealousy had reached a breaking point, and maybe the endless rain and mud had worn away my resolve. I had to tell her, especially after Gillian let it slip that it was for sure Lauren in that Spielberg audition that day. Lauren knew, had known, and yet she was playing a game with me. She was also wrapped up in set gossip about Wynn and I, to even listen that I was telling her I had never stopped loving her. I just didn't have the advantage to find her when my star fell out of the sky.

I sighed hard, cringing as the simple action hurt my lungs, and I struggled to hold back a coughing spell. I reached for the kettle to put it on, I need something warm to soothe my throat. While the kettle warmed, I closed my eyes, debating how to tell Wynn that he was misreading everything. I wasn't interested him in the way he wished, he just had been the closest friend I'd had in a very long time, and made me feel like I was back home with my family. Not a thousand miles away, letting my heart break over and over in silence over a woman I hurt so long ago. I would have to tell him after the break there was nothing there between us.

I opened my eyes when the kettle whistled, and went to reach for it when my doorbell rang. I smiled weakly, coughing lightly, it had to be my medicine. I could take it, fall into my bed and sleep for days without dreams, or my overcrowding thoughts.

I shuffled to the door, rasping out that I was coming when the doorbell rang again. I opened it, squinting at the late afternoon sun. "Please tell me you have my cough syrup."

"I do, along with a fresh pot of chicken soup, fresh baked bread, and a few other things Effy shoved into these bags."

I held my hand up to block the sun, hearing Lauren's voice confused me. I must be hallucinating from the fever. There was no way the woman would be standing at my door. And yet she was. Arms full of grocery bags, and an awkward, nervous smile on her face. "What are you doing here?" I tried to be firm, but my cold made it come out like a croak.

"I um, came to check on you. Effy told me you weren't feeling well, and I wanted to check on you. Like I do for all of my actors." Lauren stumbled over her words. "Can I come in? You look like you're about to fall over, Bo."

I shrugged, holding my hand out for the white drugstore bag. "I'll take that, you can leave the rest in the kitchen. I'll put it away." I took the white bag from Lauren and went to step away. "Thank you for dropping by, you can go now. I'm sure you have people waiting for you." I peeled open the bag, relieved to see the big bottle of cough syrup sitting like a giant with the other orange pill bottles.

I went to grab it when another coughing spell hit, the cold air from outside hitting my throat just right. I coughed so hard, I dropped the white bag, and almost fell over, clutching to my ribs instead of steadying myself. I backed up, hoping I would back up into a wall to hold me, when I felt two arms wrap around me and pull me into a unique warmth. "Easy Bo, easy. Try to relax and breathe." Lauren's voice was soft, comforting as she held me protectively against her chest. I wanted to push away from her, but was too weak to fight it. Plus her warmth was doing the trick and relaxing me as the coughing fit passed. I knew I was crying from the pain of coughing, but I didn't want her to see it. I went to push out of her arms, keeping my head down. "I'm okay."

Lauren held onto me, guiding me to the stairs. "No you're not." She set down the grocery bags, moving her arms around so I was pressed into her side as she carried most of my weight. "Bedroom is up the stairs and to the left?"

I nodded weakly, glancing at Lauren who was looking straight ahead with a worried look on her face. "Yes, how do you know?"

She smiled. "The studio owns this entire block. All the cast has the same floorplan." She helped me up the stairs, holding me tightly.

I cleared my throat. "Ah, you do spend a lot of time at Gillian's. It makes sense." I was being petty, but whatever. I could blame it on the plague I was harbouring.

I heard Lauren breathe in. "I lived next door when I was filming my second movie. Knowing the floor plan has nothing to do with Gillian, or the time I've spent with her." Her tone was firm, as if she was angry that I was suggesting she spent any time with her love.

We said nothing further until Lauren sat me on the bed. Pulling back the covers and fluffing my pillows. "Get in, and I will warm up the soup and bring you the medicine and some water." She looked at me, those damn brown eyes of hers telling me she was here not out of courtesy, but because she wanted to be.

I nodded slowly and crawled into the bed, sitting up since it hurt to lay down with all of my aches and pains. Lauren pulled the covers up and turned away quickly, running back down the stairs. I didn't have time to sort out why she was here, I had an idea Effy sent her here, before Lauren reappeared with a tray. The tray had a steaming bowl of soup, a glass of water, a glass of orange juice, and all of my drugs lined up.

She set the tray on the bedside table next to me, dragging a chair to sit down at the side of the bed. She went to pick up the bowl when I shook my head. "I'm very capable of feeding myself."

Lauren frowned, handing the bowl over to my shaky hands. "Fine. But I'm not changing the sheets if you spill." She waited until I had a firm grip on the bowl before leaning back. "How are you feeling?"

I gave her a dirty look. "Like hell." I took one spoonful of the soup, and sniffled. "I have bronchitis and a nasty cold virus. I'm sure Effy filled you in as she sent you over here."

Lauren cocked an eyebrow my way. "She didn't send me over here, like you think she did. She did tell me you were sick, and where to pick up the best chicken soup. But I'm here, because I want to be here, Bo. I care about you." She sputtered the last four words out like a broken engine.

I took another sip of the soup. "I wish I could believe that. You probably only care how me being sick sets us behind schedule." I set the bowl of soup on my lap. "I'll be better in a few days, I can come to the set for anything I missed." I was being rude, but didn't care. I had decided to stop fighting for Lauren last night, and wanted to give her a dose of her own shit. It was hard, Lauren looked adorable in her old jeans and the rare non-concert t-shirt, even though I had suspicions she had a band t-shirt underneath the pale grey flannel button up she wore.

Lauren sighed, leaning forward on her knees, running her hands through her hair. "Bo, I know this isn't the time. But we need to talk."

I chuckled, inspiring a few coughs to edge out. "What is there to talk about? I think our conversation last night was clear. I meant what I said, including letting you be happy with Gillian." I gripped the warm soup bowl, letting the heat soak into my freezing hands. "I appreciate the kindness of bringing me food, but you can leave. I won't hold it over your head if you do. I know that I'm the last person you want to be around."

I watched as Lauren's jaw twitched, and she stood up, nodding. "Fine. I'll send your boyfriend Wynn over to nurse you." She looked around the room. "He's just about done with his scenes for the day, and has been worried to death about you." Lauren grabbed the back of the chair and went to shove it back to it's place when I asked her. "What makes you think he's my boyfriend? You never expanded on that gossip. And before I drown my sorrows in cough syrup, will you tell me what gives you, Lauren, the impression that Wynn is someone I'm interested in. Especially given what I said to you, unless you don't remember that." I dipped my head down, staring at the chunks of chicken and carrots floating in broth.

"God dammit Bo! I do remember what you said last night." Lauren half shouted at me, but reeled it back when she saw me flinch. "To answer your question, I think, know Wynn is your boyfriend because of the way you two interact. The way he fawns over you, and you are always on his arm. The way he is worried about you right now, that's love, Bo. He loves you." She was pacing around the room. "That's what makes it so hard about what you said last night, makes me so scared now. Because I've carried you with me for years, and when you fall back into my life, I'm not ready. Then when I think I'm ready, you fall into the arms of a handsome boy. Shoved willingly by me because I'm so scared to feel anything for you, because when I do. It's the same thing I felt when we first met."

She looked over at me. "I've never stopped, Bo. I couldn't, even when you broke my heart seven years ago, and then stopped it in that audition. I just fought it, fought being in love with you. Buried my feelings." Her eyes filled up with tears. "But what about Gillian, I know you're going to ask it. Gillian is my friend, yes she is a woman of my past, the one I got really close to loving but couldn't because she wasn't you. She will never be you." Lauren threw her hands up in the air in defeat. "I've made a mess of everything out of my own fear of having you back in my life. The things you make me feel overwhelm me to the point that I shove you away, keep you away. Hoping that a Wynn would sweep in and take you away from, and I could stop worrying. But when he did, it only made it hurt more. Hurt more that you weren't mine, Bo."

I stared at Lauren, pacing and waving her hands around like a mad woman. A mad woman who was letting out seven years of pent up emotion.

"Everything I've accomplished in my life was to prove a point to you. Whether it was vindictive when I started, it's become nothing close to that now." She turned to look at me. "This film is my story, you're my Maggie. The one I could never resist, forget, and that's the truth." She smiled weakly. "I know my film will have a happier ending than this." She waved a hand between us. "But I can't anymore, Bo. I can't pretend that I don't feel things for you. That I still hurt from watching you throw my heart into the trash when I gave it to you. That I have no idea what I'm going to do next outside of finishing this film." She huffed out a large puff of air. "Yes, Effy made me come over here, because I asked her how I was going to fix the mess I made, before I lost you forever."

I sniffled, not from a dripping nose, but from the fact I was crying. I set the bowl down on the bedside table. Tucking my shaking hands back under the blankets. "No wonder you've won the Oscar for best drama, you sure know how to make a scene." I swallowed hard a few times. "I need to confess one thing, I never knew you were standing, watching me throw out that script. Everything made sense after you told me, that you hadn't just disappeared on me without a reason. I know I hurt you."

Lauren crossed her arms, scowling at the floor. He face was pale and flushed at the same time, the woman was on the verge of running out my room and never coming back. I could smell it in the air, well what I could smell with a stuffed up nose. "I figured by your reaction that day in the coffee shop. And yes you did hurt me, Bo. But I didn't make it any better by hurting like I have, when I…" Lauren paused, afraid to say it, and I couldn't blame her.

I nodded, sniffling and wiping my eyes with the edge of my sweater. "It was stupid of me. I hate to say that as a grown woman, I succumbed to peer pressure from my cast mates, and threw it away. Threw away a chance at something that I had to wait so many years to have again." I bit the inside of my mouth, struggling for words in a foggy, stuffed up brain. "Lauren, I…" I started to cough again, harder than the last time, bending over in pain as my lungs fought for air. And like last time, two strong arms wrapped around me, lifting me up and into her chest so I could get air in. Lauren held me as I gripped onto her back, coughing unabashedly into the sleeve of my sweater. It hurt so bad, but I wouldn't give up the way it felt to be in her arms.

When it passed, Lauren was rubbing my back, whispering comforting words against my ear. I laid my head on her shoulder, closing my eyes and breathing in slowly. I could just barely catch hints of the way she smelled of clean linen and hints of that cherry coke she loved so much on her breath.

She leaned back, holding me up reluctantly, wiping hair from my sweaty forehead. "Are you okay?" She searched my eyes with her own worried filled ones. "I should've given you the cough syrup before the soup."

I smiled weakly, finding her hand pressed against my cheek, pressing mine against it. "Would you hate me if I said, I faked that last coughing fit just so you would hold me again?" I looked up in her eyes, watching them shift from worry to a devilish glint. A hint of a smirk on her face as she shook her head.

"Not at all, Bo." She leaned over, still holding onto me, and grabbed the bottle of cough syrup. She poured out a cap full and had me slop it down, followed by a glass of water to chase out the horrible fake cherry taste. When it was down, Lauren let me curl back up into her arms, I didn't want to lie down until the syrup did it's magic. I always coughed hard when I was on my back.

I soon felt the sedative effects taking hold, resting my head back on Lauren's shoulder. "What happens next?"

Lauren pressed her cheek against the top of my head, pulling me deeper into my arms. "You sleep, try to get rid of this cough, and then we talk. We start where we kind of left off at that convention." She took a deep breath. "I know I've changed, you've changed, and whatever happens, happens. I think we've both fought the wrong battle for far too long."

I nodded slowly, slumping deeper into her arms as my eyelids grew heavy. "Will you be here when I wake up?" My voice came out like a child's, the cough syrup working faster and faster.

Lauren laughed lightly. "If you want me to be, yes. The break started an hour ago, so I have nowhere to be."

I smiled into her shoulder. "Good, I want you to be here, Lauren." I took a deep, sleepy breath in. "I love you so much, Lauren."

I didn't hear if she reciprocated, all I felt was her heart beat harder before I slipped away into the deep sleep I had been craving all day.


	8. Chapter 8

**N: short one, but i ran out of time and steam, and the idea in this was to get them somewhere else that gave them room to talk and be alone. Read on and enjoy, i need to hit the hay, the next few days are going to be hectic. Enjoy and happy holidays!**

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I had mastered the art of masking my emotions years ago. A skill quickly learned on the red carpets of the world, and now I was leaning on that ability. Bo was knocked out, Mike Tyson knocked out, from the cold medicine, and sleeping hard. I wanted to leave the room, have my silent freak out somewhere else, but she would wheeze and cough every so often, and it made me wary to leave her. So, I sat on the floor, leaning against a wall watching Bo sleep for the last few hours while I attempted to write notes for the after break schedule. Tinkering and tweaking shots. A shitty attempt to force work into my brain, and force out the fact Bo professed her love to me.

Maybe I could blame it on the alcohol in the cough syrup, the heavy antibiotics she was on, or that she was delirious with a non-existent fever, I knew because I checked her temp when she passed out. I could do that and it'd be okay? Right? I closed my eyes, leaning the back of my head against the wall, no it wouldn't. I couldn't hide from this, I couldn't plaster on the impenetrable mask I always wore. I loved her just as much, but holy shit did hearing her say it scare me on levels no horror movie could ever reach.

I let out a heavy sigh, glancing over at Bo as she coughed a little, shifting in the bed before passing back out with a gentle snore. I had almost let it slip when I was ranting like crazy, but caught myself before I went past the line of no return. I wanted to say it when I held her in my arms as she coughed up half a lung, the way she fit in my arms was like she was made just for me. Seven years later, and here I was. My arch nemesis, my drive to work to the point of exhaustion, my reason for forgoing all chances at love, was lying in a bed across from me. And she loved me.

Talk about having your entire world, your entire existence as you knew it, suddenly be stripped apart. My armor had been shattered with a handful of words spoken softly from the woman I loved for so long. What was I to do next? Besides freaking out internally? I really didn't even know who Bo was, just this stunning bull of a woman, who never back down when I locked horns with her. What if she was nothing I wanted in a partner? What if she was messy? Disorganized? Liked weird foods? Or weird, stupid TV shows I couldn't stand to watch?

I groaned, leaning forward, holding my head in my hands. "What the hell am I doing?"

"What are you doing? Sitting on the floor when there's perfectly nice furniture all around you?" Bo's weak, raspy voice carried down to the floor where I was still sitting.

I tilted my head up to look over. She was staring at me with heavy eyes, blankets tucked up to her chin. She looked better, but still rough. I held up the notepad I had scribbled notes and drawn storyboards in. "I think better sitting on the floor." I stood up, walking to the chair I had left next to her bed. "Go back to sleep, you need as much as you can get."

"I have to pee." Bo said it very matter of factly, but made no move to get out of the bed. She kept staring at me, making me feel very out of place.

"Um, did you need help?" I tucked my hands in my jean back pockets. "You're staring at me like I need to do something." I shrugged, this was all very new territory for me.

Bo smiled softly, shaking her head as she pushed the blankets back. "I can do it." She shifted and stood up slowly, holding onto the edge of the bed to steady herself. "I was staring at you, because I can't believe you're here, and I'm waiting for you to disappear." She folded her arms over her chest, coughing lightly as she shuffled to the bathroom. Her voice was low, the cough syrup still working.

I smiled tightly, nodding and waited until she closed the bathroom door, before I went about fixing her blankets and tidying up the used tissues and now cold bowl of soup. I had to busy my hands and thoughts, before I did leave the house and disappear on Bo. I picked up the tray of dishes, calling out towards the bathroom. "I'm just taking the dishes downstairs. I'll be right back."

I ran out of the room and downstairs, dumping the dishes into the dishwasher, and grabbing a fresh glass of juice, a few bottles of water, and ready made sandwich that was in the bag Effy had me grab from the same deli the soup came from. I also took a moment to answer both Effy and Gillian, who had filled my phone with text messages, asking me, in their own ways, if I had screwed the pooch. I sent them both the middle finger emoji, and that I would call them later tonight.

When that urgent matter was taken care of, I headed back upstairs, finding Bo already back in bed, sitting up. She smiled at me when I walked in, wiping her nose with a tissue. "Thank you." She nodded at the juice and water. "I need to take the other pills."

I moved to the bedside table, sitting the drinks down, and handed her the sandwich. "You should eat a few bites, that way the antibiotics won't bother your stomach." I unwrapped the brown paper, looking at the insides. "Looks like it's a plain turkey and cheese." I handed it over. "I can make something else, if this isn't your favorite."

Bo shook her head, taking the sandwich. "No, you're find. This sandwich is my favorite. I eat it on set at least three times a week." She took a small bite off the corner. "Effy is practically perfect."

I chuckled, sitting down in the chair across from her. Still avoiding the pink elephant in the room. "She is. Annoying, but perfect." I picked up a pill bottle, pretending to read the directions when Bo spoke up.

"You don't have to stay with me. I think I'll be fine on my own." She sniffled, taking another bite. "I don't want to get you sick, Lauren."

I looked up, Bo was clearly picking up on my uneasiness. She had that strange sadness in her eyes, the same one I had already seen far too many times. I set the pill bottle down in my lap, fidgeting with the label that read Ysabeau Dennis. "I never get sick, I don't even throw up from drinking too much. Ysabeau? How did you keep that one hidden from the world?"

She smiled, shrugging in the most adorable way, tugging on my heart. "I left it back in the Midwest when I moved west. Bo is my stage name, but Ysabeau is my full name." She looked down at her sandwich, picking at the crust. "I don't want you to feel like you have to be here, Lauren. It's been a weird couple of days."

I raised my eyebrows. "It has, and I know weird." I smiled at Bo. "You can't go to Cannes after parties and see things your mother never warned you about." When that earned a soft laugh, I moved closer to Bo. "When you passed out, I said I'd be here when you woke up, I don't break promises." I sighed. "But um, I think you were drugged up and I don't think you remember everything you said."

Bo's smile faded completely, and she set the sandwich down on the bedside table. "I know what I said, Lauren." She looked up to catch my eyes. "I meant it. I love you, Lauren. Have for a very long time, and I'm tired. Literally, and I don't want to keep ignoring the things I feel about you. I did that for seven years." She sniffled again, and I wasn't sure if it was just her runny nose. "I understand if you don't…."

"Why do love me? How do you love me?" I blurted it out. "I'm sorry, but I'm having a hard time processing this, and it's not your fault. I just, never had this." I waved between us. "Before. And I mean, you've met me. I'm not an easy one to care for. You really don't know anything about me, I could be a disgusting creature who never takes the trash out." I frowned, leaning back in my chair as I suddenly felt stupid.

"Why do I love you? Easy, because you're you, Lauren. You're a force that is unbending in the most incredible ways, but you would give anyone the shirt off your back if they needed it. You're beautiful, intelligent, funny in a silly dry sense of humor, you're strong, and you are really warm when you hug me. I've fallen harder for you in the last few weeks, watching you. Even when you treated me like a kid sister, you move with a purpose, passion." Bo let out a slow breath, coughing a little and wincing, causing me to reach for the cough syrup. "How I love you. With all of my heart, Lauren. And if you do end up being a lazy trash monster, all I at least know I tried and gave you my all before we walked away from each other." Bo smiled, grabbing my hand holding the bottle of purple goo. "I can't explain it, I just know what I feel for you, and its pure love. Love at first sight."

I swallowed hard, covering her hand with mine and lifting it up so I could slide my fingers in hers. Sighing at the way our hands fit, I hated holding hands with others. It always felt awkward, out of place, but with Bo, it felt right. I glanced up, smiling at the way Bo was looking at me. It made my heart skip for the first time in my life. "You make my heart do strange things."

Bo gave me a strange look. "I do?"

I nodded, running my thumb over her knuckles. Her skin was so soft, but not too soft in the way that she's never had to work for a living. "You do, and I like it." I watched as her big brown eyes brightened up. "I like you, Bo. A lot, and I'm pretty sure by the end of this day, I will tell you that I love you. But first, I want to spend the day getting to know Ysabeau." I grinned when Bo's cheeks turned a bright pink. "Unless you want to go back to sleep?"

Bo shook her head furiously. "I don't, not yet." She coughed a little, frowning. "Can I at least lay down while I tell your stories? It hurts to sit up."

I nodded, letting go of her hand to help her curl back up under the blankets. "Please stop if you want to get some rest. We have a few days to talk, I'd feel guilty if I kept you up."

Bo sighed, snaking her hand out from under the blankets reaching for mine. "I just realized I professed my love to you, and we've never had a date, shared a first kiss." She blushed at her own words. "Never mind me, I'm on drugs."

I chuckled, taking her hand and scooting closer, I had the sudden need to kiss the brunette, but held back. I was still leaning on the side of caution, this whole situation was risky business, and it could go sour if I wasn't careful. It was the past rearing its memory, reminding me of all the bad things. "I think our entire relationship is out of the ordinary, why change it now?" I held her hand in both of mine, warming it up as she settled deeper into the pillows. "So, shall we start from the beginning? What made Ysabeau Dennis take on the craft of acting?"

Bo smiled sheepishly. "Bea Arthur."

I raised my eyebrows. "Bea Arthur? The golden girl?"

"The one and only." Bo shrugged. "I used to watch old sitcoms in the basement. We had a TV that had three channels, and one showed nothing but old, and I mean old, reruns. I grew up watching Maude, Taxi, and All in the Family. Bea Arthur fascinated me with her demeanor, and I love playing pretend as a kid. I wanted to be Bea Arthur when I grew up, but the world of entertainment changed slightly in the thirty years it took me to get a steady acting gig."

I stared at Bo with mild awe, holding back a bit of laughter. "Wow."

Bo frowned, squeezing my hand hard. "Shut up. You asked, and I'm telling."

I shook my head. "No, no it's not a dig. It makes a lot of sense how you carry yourself on screen. Like a tall, in control, take no shit woman." I smirked, laughing. "I just never suspected Bea Arthur, I was waiting for you to come out with the typical motivation of watching old movies, seeking inspiration from the Hepburns, the Gardners, the Taylors. All the greats of yesteryear."

"Nope. Just good old Bea Arthur and a broken black and white TV." Bo yawned. "My ego, before you ask, came from playing the game of being an instant sex symbol, icon for men and women, and just having too much of everything way too fast. I'm sure Bea would've slapped me for the way I acted at the height of my fame."

"I would agree with that." I looked up at Bo with a smile. "Lessons learned in 15 minutes, I've always wanted to write my biography with that title."

"You should." Bo looked down at our hands. "I hope one day I, we, can look back on the lessons that brought us here, happily." She looked slowly up into my eyes. "You ever think fate is real, Lauren?"

I went to answer her, when the doorbell rang, startling us both. I looked towards the door. "Are you expecting anyone?"

Bo slowly shook her head, then paused. "Shit, I bet its Wynn."

I dropped Bo's hand and went to stand up, reality sinking in. "Should I go let him in? You can have a few minutes with him?"

Bo scooted out from under the covers. "I need a few minutes to get rid of him, yes." She pointed at me, glaring through a few hearty coughs. "You stay right where you are." She shuffled to her feet, wrapped a blanket around her shoulders and headed downstairs.

When she was gone, I paced nervously along the length of the small bedroom, gnawing on my thumb. This wasn't good, Wynn had feelings for Bo. Bo had feelings for me, I had feelings, that I was still trying ignore and embrace. I paced two more times, listening to Wynn's worried tone carry up the stairs, mixed in with Bo coughing. I yanked my phone out of my back pocket, making a split, spontaneous decision as I heard Wynn basically say he would be back in an hour to stay with Bo while she recovered. I had to stake my hard claim on Bo, if even I was scared about furthering whatever this was with her.

Effy's chipper voice answered on the first ring. "And? Should I be planning press releases about the lead actress and her director falling in love? Shall I start looking for quaint bungalows in the south of France?"

I rolled my eyes. "No, none of that. This is still in the very early stages, the early keep your mouth shut stages until I have an idea of what the hell I'm doing." I sighed, pacing more. "Can you make sure the fridge is stocked, and the pantry? And that the guest room next to my bedroom is presentable? I think I left empty boxes all over the bed last month."

"Um, yes, yes, and of course. But, why?"

"I'm going to bring Bo to my house. This house the studio gave her is drafty, humid, and piss poor with the heating. She has no food to be seen, and she's very sick. I know the set doctor lives three doors down from me, in case she needs another checkup." I glanced as I heard Wynn slightly raise his voice in a pleading manner, followed by more coughs. Bo needed to take her medicine and sleep, not deal with Wynn, or have speed dating questions rattled her way.

Effy chuckled. "You want to shoo her away into your hideaway to keep Wynn the wonder one away, don't you? I knew he was headed straight to his loves, but I wasn't sure about your status. A middle finger emoji isn't very descriptive outside of telling me to piss off. I require a few more details to properly plan."

I ran a hand through my hair, hearing Wynn finally say goodbye and the front door click shut. I rushed to the top of the stairs, catching a very downtrodden Bo leaning against the wall. "Effy, please, make it happen. I'm going to get her in the car and I'll be home in thirty minutes." I sighed at her chuckles. "Effy. This is me taking a chance. Me betting on the stupid chemistry you kept shoving in my face, I don't know what I'm doing other than listening to you and Gillian."

Effy stopped her giggles, and I could almost hear her proud grin. "About damn time, Lauren. The house will be perfect upon your arrival. Park in the garage so no one sees you two. Gillian and I will cover the gaps, the gossip, and what not." She paused. "I know it means absolutely tits all to you, but I'm proud of you. Proud you're taking a chance with Bo."

I smiled sheepishly, waving at Bo to stay where she was. "It means the world to me, Effy." I hung up before she got out the shucks in awe shucks, and looked at Bo. "Get your coat, hat, gloves, and boots on. Wait for me here."

Bo slowly raised her head up. "I really just want to get back in bed." She coughed, grimacing. "Lauren, what are you doing? I just broke a really nice man's heart, or will in the morning. You're pacing like a rabid dog, and my chest hurts."

I waved at her, rushing into her room to grab her medicine and my notebook. I ran back out and down the stairs, grabbing my coat and throwing it around her shoulders. "You're coming home with me." I headed to the kitchen to grab the grocery bag still filled with snacks. "You need to be warm, and this house isn't the answer. Plus, I think you need a place to hide from Wynn and the rest for a few days."

Bo looked at me with groggy, wide eyes. "Your house? I'm going to your rental house? The same one I auditioned in?"

I came out of the kitchen with arms full, nodding. "It's not a rental anymore, I bought it three weeks ago." I shrugged when she gave me another look. "I like England, and I never spend any money." I reached out, tucking the bag under my arms and buttoned my coat over Bo's blanket. "I have a guest room that has an incredible fire place, heavy blankets and expensive pillows." I looked up at her, still staring at me confused. I let out a slow breath. "I don't know what I'm doing, but all I know is that I want time with you, and I can't have that if your….friend, is pounding on your door. Call me selfish, devious, what have you." I placed my hands on both sides of her face, feeling the flushed heat from the exertion of walking down the stairs. "If you don't want to go with me, just say the word."

Bo grinned, leaning into my hands. "The first thing that popped into my head was banana just now." She looked up. "Can that be our safe word? Banana?" She smirked. "I'm kidding, my mind has a mind of its own when I'm sick. It'll get worse before it gets better. But yes, I want to go with you. You won me with fireplace and fancy pillows."

I laughed, shaking my head. "You're delirious, come on. I'll get you in the car before you pass out, or think I'm a walking banana." I went to step away, drop my hands from her face before I went with my gut. "Wait, Bo?"

"Yes?" She held my eyes with bright, still coherent ones.

"I need to do this before we go anywhere." I leaned forward, brushing my lips against hers, waiting for the silent rejection of her pulling away. She didn't. Bo gasped lightly, leaning forward and pressing her lips against mine. I grinned against her mouth and kissed her as gently as I could. I soon felt Bo lean her entire body into the kiss, pressing harder, and opening her mouth wider. It was the sweetest, most tender kiss I had ever experienced, and it made me feel whole. Whole for the first time in a very long time, that stupid hum filling my ears in a white noise chorus of joy.

I went to take the kiss further, when Bo backed away quickly. Her eyes wide open as she covered her mouth. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry! You're going to get sick, I'm going to get you sick!" She started coughing, struggling to keep it gentle, when her lungs really wanted to let go and make her double over in pain.

I laughed, shaking my head, running my thumb under her bottom lip. "I never get sick, but this will be a memorable first kiss for us." I winked at her and stepped away, grabbing her elbow and the bag full of our things. "Let's go. We need to get you into a warm bed with more cough syrup."

Bo leaned into my side, resting her head on my shoulder as I walked us out to my car. "I like the sound of that, all of it." She then looked up at me, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "Can we redo that kiss when I feel better? And not so afraid I'm going to hack up a lung on you? I'd really like to kiss you again, Lauren."

I grinned. "And I'd really like to kiss you again, Bo."

I still had no firm grasp on what I was doing, I was going with it. And what that it was, I didn't know. All I knew was that it felt right.


	9. Chapter 9

**N: Happy Holidays! It's a short update, a little drama but nothing too crazy. It will all right itself soon, i had a hell of a time writing this due to a injury to my left hand. Yeah 2016 has been a greaaaattt year. Anyways, read on, and this starts with Bo POV and switches...so yeah.**

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I woke up with one thought in my head, cough medicine is a godsend. I felt immensely better than I had hobbling around my house, and the last coughing fit I had in Lauren's kitchen, was now a distant memory. I had wanted to spend more time with her, but that episode had her escorting me to the guest bedroom, loading me up on cough syrup and tucking me into the fluffiest bed I'd ever met.

I was now laying on my back, staring at the exposed wooden beams in the ceiling. I could already tell I was in a very old, yet well taken care of home. I wanted to get up, but was testing my lungs to see if they were ready to rebel the second I exerted an ounce of energy. After fifteen minutes of laying very still, I took a chance, and rolled to sit up on the edge of the bed. I took one deep breath in, relieved when I only coughed a tiny bit. I still felt like a truck ran over me, backed up, and ran over me again, but I was much better than yesterday. I smiled sheepishly, maybe being in Lauren's house had something to do with the giddy, warm feeling hovering around the bottom of my stomach. I shook it off and looked around the room I was in. It was huge, almost the size of the living room and kitchen in the studio house, and it echoed old English style. Dark woods, light colored walls, and built in bookshelves lining the walls. The only interruption were the huge lead glass windows that brought in warm, yellow light to touch the end of the massive bed I was in. The room was bare from decoration, aside from stacks of boxes in one corner. "This is what it's like to be really successful." I whispered the words. I had once come very close to this kind of success, and pissed it all away driven by exhaustion and ego. Now sitting in this room, it left me thinking what if. A lot of what if's. But I quickly shook them off when every what if lead me away from this moment, these moments, that had me in Lauren's house. Had me in her house and hopefully finding her soon and re-doing that first kiss.

I grinned out of nowhere, feeling my cheeks burn with embarrassment. That kiss, it was pretty great. Even though I was a walking ground zero for the plague and had certainly infected Lauren, it was better than all of the kisses I had in my life. Leaving me definitely wanting more.

Letting out a slow breath, testing the plague once more before I got to my feet and walked across the cool wooden floors, huddling up in a thick sweatshirt that wasn't mine, and went to the windows. Even the view was spectacular. The lush greenery dotted with a brushing of snow, painted a picture exactly like those fancy puzzles my grandmother used to work on during the winter. I sighed, this felt like a hazy dream, everything was so perfect. And I had learned through the years, nothing that looked perfect was ever perfect.

I pressed my forehead against the cool glass, enjoying the way it felt against my warm skin. I knew I had to be careful, careful with Lauren and careful with whatever this was growing between us. I could see the skittishness in her eyes, the fear, and the doubt when I spoke about my feelings for her. All of it was the truth, deep truths I had been sitting on for years, but I had to be careful. Lauren was precious to me and I didn't want to lose her out of haste, or being too comfortable.

I lifted my head from the window, looking towards the large wooden door, hearing Lauren's voice muted behind it. I then recognized Effy's voice as the two talked about work, filming schedules and upcoming press. I stood frozen, wondering if Effy knew I was here, if anyone knew I was in this house with Lauren. As it stood, everyone thought Lauren hated me, so it would be interesting gossip to find me bundled up in her bed, and probably her clothes. I sighed again, closing my eyes. Then there was Wynn. The sweetest man I'd met in ages, and I was about to destroy his hear. Lauren had been right, he was in love with me. I could see it in his eyes as he begged for me to let him take care of me. Begged me to talk to him, and answer his request to take me out to dinner on break and then meet his parents. I had been terrible in regards to paying attention to Wynn when he fawned over me, too busy staring past him at Lauren and Gillian, or just Lauren. He was a shadow, a shield for me to hide behind as I dealt with the feelings growing for my director. Maybe I enjoyed the safety he provided me, keeping me confident, and that I could actually play this role of a lifetime. Whatever it was, I had made a new mess and it was going to destroy him when I finally sat him down and told him I wasn't interested. I would have to do that soon, more so if things progressed with Lauren.

I pushed away from the windows, walking towards the closet next to the bathroom. I needed to find some fresh clothes to change into after I took a very hot shower, I couldn't remember if any of mine was packed into that torn grocery bag Lauren had in her hand as she buttoned me up, and swept me into her car. I had glimpsed a few old shirts on a shelf when I got out of the bed, maybe one would fit.

As I walked past the pile of boxes, something caught my eye, drawing my attention to look inside. In the box closest to me, there was a stack of notebooks, sketchbooks and on top was a picture of my younger self. My youthful eyes staring back at me as I was covered in the heavy makeup Samira wore on my silly science fiction show. I smiled, reaching in and lifting up the framed photograph. It was three lifetimes ago when I did this head shot for the promotional department. I ran my hand over my face, stopping right at my own horrible handwriting. "To Lauren, I wish only the best for you. With love, Bo Dennis."

I felt my stomach drop as flashes of that day I met Lauren, struck like lightning. "What I wouldn't give to go back in time."

"I think if you did, we both would've had very different lives." Lauren's voice was soft as she entered the room.

I spun around, clutching the frame to my chest, my face a bright red from being caught. "Maybe, but I'd still like to go back and apologize."

Lauren smiled softly, walking towards the bed with her arms full of black clothing boxes. She set them down on the bed, placing her hands on her hips. "I think if you did apologize to me, I would've never built the driving work ethic I did." She looked over at me. "I wouldn't have the success I have now, and I'm pretty sure you and I wouldn't have worked out for very long." She shrugged, smiling. "You know the whole nobody dating a super star stigma? We'd have divorced in a few years and probably still end up where we both are now."

I gave her a look. "Divorced? Are you suggesting we would've married?"

Lauren tilted her head down, nodding as she pointed towards the boxes. "I had Effy get you some new clothes. I forgot a critical item when I whisked you away. Clean underwear."

Lauren was avoiding the question I brought up. I avoided it to, for now, I didn't want to press. Careful. I had to be careful. "Clean underwear is a critical detail." I coughed lightly, making the frame in my arms creak.

Lauren took a few steps towards me, concern all over her face. "How are you feeling?"

I waved her off. "Better. Good. The drugs are doing their job." I waved at the bed. "I just woke up, went to try and find you, when I heard you and Effy outside. So, I." I held up the frame, setting it back into the box. "Decided to snoop on the way to the bathroom." I smiled softly. "I'm not going to lie in your house."

Lauren smiled, taking the last few steps between us. "You should feel better, you've been asleep for the entire day, it's almost dinner time." Lauren winked at me. "All of my deep secrets are locked in my bedroom. This is just old stuff my mother shipped out of her basement when I told her I bought this house." Lauren leaned over, looking in the box. "She figured now that I have two houses, I have more than enough room to keep my junk, and free up her basement."

"It doesn't look like junk to me."

"It's junk. Trust me. All of my terrible stories, first screenplays, set drawings, and all that garbage." She glanced at me, reaching down and picking up the frame I had set back. "This, this was a prized possession of mine for a very long time. It sat above my writing desk, my inspiration, my admittedly angry inspiration, to write. Write and write until I could stand I front of you and say, ha! I beat you!" Lauren's face scrunched up. "I'm sorry Bo, I shouldn't be telling you this."

I shook my head, grabbing her wrist and pulling her closer to me. "Yes, you should. Because it's a part of you, parts of you that I want to know about. Learn, cherish and love." I tipped my head down. "I need to stop telling you I love you like a love-struck teen."

Lauren's hand fell to the side of my face, gently lifting it to force me to look at her. "Don't stop. Every time you say it, I can see you mean it more than the last time you said it." She smiled, running her thumb across my skin. "It gives me confidence. More confidence than you can ever imagine."

I leaned forward to kiss her when a nagging cough squeaked out, forcing me to take a step back. I was still very sick and didn't want to kiss Lauren and not feel it, taste it. "I should shower." I stepped out of her touch. "You mentioned dinner?"

Lauren smiled, finally, and I soaked it up. It was rare to see the blonde smile like she was, but when she did, I memorized it. "I did. Effy is arranging that right now. I wanted to drop off the clothes, see how you were doing and then maybe ask you to have dinner with me?"

I grinned, Lauren was such a awkward romantic, but a true romantic. "Of course I will have dinner with you."

Lauren's smile turned into a huge grin, her cheeks pinking up. "Perfect. I hope you like whatever take out Effy decided on. I'm a hopeless and lazy chef." Lauren tucked her hands into her jean pockets. "I'll see you in my den in say a half hour?"

I nodded, then paused as Lauren went to leave the room. "Where is your den?"

Lauren chuckled. "Take the first left out of this room, go to the end of the hall, turn right, go down the stairs and it will be the first room on the left." She winked at me. "I can draw you a map if you'd like."

I shook my head, enjoying this silly side of Lauren. "I think I got. Left, end of hall, right, down the stairs and first room on the left?"

Lauren laughed, nodding her head as she walked out of the room. "You've got it, Bo. I'll see you soon."

I let out a slow breath when the door shut behind her, and walked to the black boxes. Opening them up, I found a variety of clothing all in my size. That's when I smiled, Effy had been to my trailer and pulled some of my extra clothes out of it. The only thing that was brand new was the box full of underwear. A note on top in Effy's handwriting.

-Every gal needs new underwear when taking on a new adventure. Don't tell Lauren, she thinks I rummaged through your unmentionables. Good luck, Bo. Lauren is worth the fight, the hassle, the headache, the stomach aches, and the never ending heartburn. Xox Effy. –

I laughed out loud in the empty room, I knew Effy would know about Lauren and I. She was observant and I knew she was hiding around the corner that day in the barn. I didn't care that she knew, she was a very trusted friend of Lauren's and would never betray that loyalty. I smiled as I grabbed the new underwear, my old shirts and sweatpants, and shuffled off to the bathroom, where another surprised awaited me. One of those giant, multi shower head showers the size of a small car. I grinned with excitement, coughing as I turned the shower on and let the steam fill the room and ease the ache in my lungs.

Today might just be a good day.

* * *

XXX

"Is this pacing thing new? Or what, Lauren." Effy stood against the kitchen island, watching me pace back and forth. "I've never seen you so visibly…mobile with distress."

I ran both of my hands through my hair. "It's not new, I just never do it in front of anyone." I closed my eyes as I circled back, pacing the length of the island. "I'm nervous. Beyond first day of school, first red carpet, and first everything nervous." I glanced at the woman, watching with her eyes and giving me a look. "I never act on spontaneity and yet, I've kidnapped Bo. She's wearing my sweatshirt." I pointed at Effy. "Which I think is your doing, when I asked you to check on her."

"She was shivering, it was close by." Effy held her hands up in defense. "Did you want me to let the poor girl shiver to death?" A tiny smirk covered her face.

I paused, swinging around to face my assistant. "You could have turned on the heated blanket I laid over her." I let out a sigh. "She found my box of Boston crap. The autographed picture of her that I stupidly explained became my totem of hate motivation."

"Well done." She smiled as I shot her a dirty look. "Relax Lauren. The girl would probably take a sucker punch from you and stand there with a smile, anything as long as she was next to you." She slid a cold bottle of cherry coke my way. "Everything is fine. I saw nothing out of place when I collected her things from the trailer. No one was around, just the other crews for that science fiction flick filming next to us."

I snatched the bottle up, taking a large sip. "What about Gillian?"

"She's also heard nothing. She said the cast only brought up Bo in pure care and concern. Wynn showed up late to the cast outing, happy but concerned his lady was at home alone. And no one said a negative, or suspicious word about you. All is very well in the village, so relax, and focus on being with Bo." Effy walked around the island and patted my shoulder. "I'm going to pop off and grab dinner for you two, in the meantime, relax. Relax and relax a little more after that."

I sighed, shaking my head as if it was the impossible, waving Effy off as she trotted out of the back door. "Relax, how can I relax around Bo?"

"I can tell a few bad dad jokes? That usually cuts the tension."

I turned to see Bo entering the kitchen, wearing sweatpants and a very old World's Unknown cast zip up hoody. I smiled awkwardly. "Sorry, I tend to talk out loud when I think I'm alone." I also took noticed she was fresh out of the shower, and her natural beauty was incredible, making me swallow hard. "I'm nervous, because I realized I might have kidnapped you."

Bo shrugged, walking towards me. "It's not kidnapping if you go willingly." She smiled, reaching out to find my hand. "Now, why can't you relax around me? Is it because I'm a walking disease? Or what? I want you to be honest Lauren."

I stared in her big brown eyes, begging for me to be truthful, that she was as nervous as I was. I waited a moment before speaking. "I guess it's because my past feelings for you creep up at the worst moments, or in the middle of the perfect moments and my stupid speaks for me." I looked down at her hand. "What I said in the bedroom, I didn't mean it, Bo. I care for you deeply, I want you here, and I want to see what comes next, but."

"But it's hard, because I hurt you so deeply." Bo squeezed my hand, sniffling before wiping her nose with a tissue. "I don't, and won't take anything to heart in regards to your past. I want you to get it out, tell me the truth."

I frowned slightly. "Bo."

She shook her head, grinning. "A woman who still hated me wouldn't have shown up at my door with soup, take care of me, then kidnap me to her majestic castle, and be here." She reached up, running her hand down the side of my face. "And I see it in your eyes, the true way you feel about me. It will always betray the words you speak." Bo leaned forward, kissing me softly on the cheek. "Now, tell me something about yourself. Something no one else would know, Bea Arthur me up."

I rolled my eyes, smiling as I pulled Bo closer, wrapping her up in a warm hug. "Effy will be back in a few minutes with our dinner, I only have time for a quick embarrassing story."

Bo pressed her hands against my back before leaning out of my arms. "Let's start with one, then maybe I'll tell you about the time I fell down the backstage stairs at the Emmy's, ripping the arm off of George Clooney's tux."

I grinned. "That was you? I remember him telling me that story a few years ago, but. That was you?" I laughed as Bo nodded sheepishly. "Well, I need to hear your side, so I guess I'll share a story. My first Academy awards, I ditched all of the after parties to take a cab to the library I spent all of my life in when I moved to Los Angeles. It was the only place I could have quiet and write, with working internet. I took the Oscar statue and hid it up on a shelf in the reference section, and taped a note on the bottom. Telling whoever found this, could keep it, and use it as inspiration knowing if the chubby kid from Boston could do it, anyone can do it."

Bo smiled, tilted her head. "You left your first academy award in an old library? Like if we went back, would it still be there?"

I nodded. "Probably." I then held up a finger as Bo went to say something about how ridiculous it was to leave such a precious award in a public place. "It was the fake one they give everyone before they engrave and send you the real one. But, the point of the story is still real. I wanted to inspire someone like I had been inspired." I looked down into Bo's eyes. "Like you inspired me."

Bo's eyes welled up, reaching up to hold the sides of my face. "Lauren, that story is amazing." She rolled her eyes softly. "Not as great as my Bea Arthur story, but pretty good."

I frowned, pinching her side playfully, making her laugh. "I love the sound of your laugh, Bo." I leaned forward, kissing her soundly on the lips without giving her a chance to back away. I could give two shits about her being sick, I honestly never got sick, and I had been craving to kiss her since I spotted her in the guest bedroom.

Bo responded, pressing against my mouth, grabbing my hips and pulling me deeper into her body, causing me to moan at the sensation of being so close. This hum between Bo and I was so much stronger than anything I had with Gillian, or anyone else. It was consuming and made me feel alive, alive like the young me. It was like Bo was time traveling and giving me back all the things I thought I lost when she broke my heart seven years ago.

I pushed Bo back until the island stopped us, and the gentle kiss started to grow in passion, need, and we were on the verge of unabashedly making out when I heard the very familiar sound of Gillian clearing her throat. Bo broke from me, covering her face with her hands and turning away as I scowled at the red head. "Do you knock?"

Gillian shook her head, not at all amused. "I did, then Effy let me in after I showed her this."

Effy appeared on cue, holding bags of carry out and a panicked look on her face. "Sorry Lauren, I told her to wait for me to introduce her, then she showed me the tabloids."

I furrowed my brow. "The tabloids? What do you mean?"

Gillian tossed the magazine on to the counter, the hearty slap startling me. She pointed at the cover. "You have rat in the midst of the crew, or Wynn the wonder boy is blabbing. But this is a morning away from being all over the entertainment sites."

I picked up the magazine, my jaw clenching at the bold headline reading WYNN EDGAR AND HIS MYSTERIOUS NEW LOVE CAUGHT ON SET. RUMORS HAVE IT, MARRIAGE IS ON THE HORIZON!

There was a picture of Bo and Wynn walking arm and arm around the set trailers, Bo was looking up at Wynn in a way that would provide plenty of fodder for paparazzi. The picture was taken two days before she confronted me in the barn. I threw the magazine down. "It's a picture, big deal."

Gillian snatched it up, flipping open the cover and jabbing her finger at the article. "The big deal is the exclusive interview of a anonymous crew member. Saying they've never seen Wynn so smitten, and Bo equally as smitten. They also mention your shitty attitude towards Bo, spiking interest that you have a crush on Bo and you're determined to sabotage their relationship." She jabbed at another article. "This is a picture of you standing outside of Bo's door yesterday, you're resting angry face giving them reason that this set is a hotbed of drama." Gillian folded her arms across her chest. "Never mind the fact I have Wynn the wonder blowing up my phone, asking me where Bo is and what I know about you and her." She glanced at Bo who was pale faced, still covering her mouth with a hand. "This is about to get dirty, Lauren. I've already had to chase paps away from my front door, questioning me about all this mess."

"Shit." I clenched my jaw. "Shit." I looked back over at Bo. "Did you know anything about this? What did you and Wynn talk about when he came to your door yesterday? Are you and him in on this? A little career boost at my benefit?" I had a sinking feeling, and couldn't resist asking. I hated the paparazzi and hated when my life was splashed around for the world to see.

Bo's face dropped, her eyes filling with anger. "You really think that I'd do anything like this? Leak bullshit gossip about a relationship that doesn't exist? He's my friend, Lauren. Nothing more. And what I told him at my door yesterday was that I had fallen in love with someone else, and that I would tell him all about it when I felt better." She glared at me with blurry eyes. "He was hurt, but understood, saying he had seen it in my eyes that I was in love." She backed up away from me. "I told you I would never hurt you again, Lauren, no matter what. Even when I heard shitty rumors you were the one who said no to me at that Spielberg audition. That I had it, but you were the final decision and you said no." She shook her head as Effy gasped in awe and Gillian raised her eyebrows at me. Bo walked over to the magazine, grabbing it and tearing it in half. "This is all lies, more lies to keep us apart and if you want to believe this, fine. But I think it's just another excuse for you to keep more distance between us. I love you, Lauren." She sniffled, throwing her hands up in defeat. "I love you and I would never do anything to ruin this last chance I have."

Bo spun around and ran out of the kitchen, crying. I didn't follow, frozen in my own stupidity, until I felt Gillian's hand on my arm, turning me to face her. Green eyes piercing mine. "Before I shove you off to chase after your girl, did you real muck up her chance for that Spielberg film?"

I shook my head, tears running down my eyes. "No, never. I actually put her in the top five choices, and he went with number three. As much as I hated her then, I still…loved her too much to hurt her." I bent my head down, tears rushing down my cheeks as Gillian patted my shoulder. "I'm never going to get this right."

"Yes, you are." Gillian shoved me gently. "You have to trust that woman, and stop caring about the world around you." She glanced at Effy. "We will take care of the tabloids, go apologize to Bo and figure out how to love her like you do. I think she ran off in the direction of your bedroom, probably lost and tangled up in the maze of hallways this house holds."

I sighed closing my eyes as Gillian physically turned me around, kicking me in the ass to send me after Bo. I swallowed hard, I was making mistake after mistake, always searching for a reason not to love Bo, only to find that I loved her more than I could talk myself out of.

Now I just had to finally tell her that, before I did lose her.


	10. Chapter 10

**N: short, but i needed to do something to tide ya'll over and not leave you hanging. So here you go, there will be things coming on the horizon, but i have to think about it. Plus work is crazy busy and im crazy tired. Enjoy, read, review and tell me things...**

I found Bo in my bedroom, sniffling and sitting on the floor against one of the bookcases. She was resting her forehead on the tops of her knees, her entire body curled up tight as she took deep breaths in. Coughing here and there. I felt horrible, not only was I being a dick to Bo, she was still very ill.

I walked in my room, closing the door behind me softly. The room was a mess, there were notes, storyboards, script copies, and a junk everywhere. My bedroom was the one other place I worked outside of my den. It was also the one place in my house where my private side was laid out. I had movie posters as framed wallpaper, my nerdy knick knacks from Boston hanging on walls and tucked in between books on the shelves. Never mind the giant fantasy map of Scotland blanket that covered my bed, hiding the tiny felt pillow that looked like that handsome Scottish boy from that one TV show. If anyone walked into this room, they would never ever believe I lived in it. Gillian had a hard time when she first slept over at my California house, which is far worse than this bedroom. I sighed, pushing away and looking over at a random plastic tub right above Bo's head. "Bo, I'm sorry, I have a knee jerk reaction to the tabloids. They've always managed to tamper with pieces of my life from the second I became famous."

Bo's head shot up, her hands falling to the wooden floor as she scrambled to her feet. "I know I shouldn't be in here, I got lost and my frustration, and upset lungs, had me giving up." She gripped to the shelf behind her, refusing to look at me. "I'll go back to my room and eat there. I'm getting a bit tired."

I stepped closer to Bo, catching a glance of the giant wooden elephant right next to her left hand, a gentle voice reminding me of something. "You don't have to, I want to apologize for thinking you were the leak. But, like I said, I am not a fan of the paparazzi."

Bo sniffled, wiping at her nose. She had been crying, crying a lot and it made my stomach hurt. "It's part of the life we live, Lauren." She paused, steeling her gaze. Anger slipping in around the edges. "I've suffered plenty at the hands of those people, to understand what you go through. And I would never, ever, use those filthy so called journalists to benefit me."

She tucked her hands into the pockets of her sweatshirt. "I've been splashed all over the papers. I've had supposed affairs with the entire cast of that show, I've slept with the producer, the producer's wife, and had my weight changes become top news. So, I understand Lauren, I also understand why you have a knee jerk reaction to them. I lost my mind a few times, screaming at my PR agent and manager, trying to sue any tabloid who pasted me on the front page. All it got me was a bigger, nastier headline the next week." Bo took in a steadying breath, looking away from me. "I've lost relationships, jobs, and most of my family thought for a very long time I was a drug addict, and far worse that I don't want to talk about. There was a lot of pain, damage done by others trying to get a career boost for my benefit. At the end, I wanted to become a drug addict just to numb the pain of being fodder for fools." Her eyes welled up as she blinked, wiping them before the tears could slip free. "You're not alone, Lauren, so stop acting like it." I felt the hurt, the anger, the sadness in her tone. The paparazzi and tabloids could tear the strongest person down to nothing with their incessant ways. They were the biggest bullies on the block.

I stared at Bo, watching her huddle up into her sweatshirt. I had forgotten about Bo and her past with the media. I had remembered seeing her at the end of her TV career, right as I was shifting into the spotlight, be beat up by the media. "You're right." I stepped closer to her, frowning when she stepped away as I reached for the elephant and the plastic tub behind her head. "I won't justify my behavior in the kitchen, or that my fame makes me feel like I'm utterly alone and I get nervous when they get too close for comfort." I set the elephant on top of the tub, looking up at Bo. "I know I need to pull my head out of my secluded ass, and trust you. I know if you wanted to throw me to the wolves, you would have the second I brought you to my house and found all of that junk in my box of old things." I waved a hand around my room. "And now that you're in my private bedroom, you have headlines upon headlines to share." I pointed at the Detroit Tigers hat sitting on the back of my desk chair. "One being I'm from Boston but root for the Tigers. Second." I pointed at the top of the red felt head of my Scottish man pillow. "I sleep with a pillow who wears a kilt, just two tiny tidbits that would cast doubt on my very stoic, cold exterior."

Bo looked around the room, it sinking in that she was really in a very private space. "I just thought this was a catch all room." She coughed a little, defeat still hiding in those big brown eyes. "I can leave, if it makes you uncomfortable."

I shook my head. "The only way I will feel comfortable is when you make me uncomfortable." I held out my hand to her. "I want you to stay, and come sit with me on the bed. I have something I really want to show you."

Bo hesitated until I wiggled my fingers at her. "Please?"

Bo let out a slow sigh. "Only because you said please, this still doesn't let you off the hook." She slid her hand into mine. "I can only take so much, Lauren. My patience is holding only because I'm so tired and drugged up, and I have no idea where the hell I am to call a cab and take me away." She tried to smile, emphasizing that maybe it was a joke, but deep down I knew she was telling the truth. I was testing this woman, and would continue to test her, but right now I needed to let go. Let go and breathe myself.

I held her warm hand, walking her to the edge of my messy bed and helped her up onto the massive mattress. I waited until she scooted to the end, tucking herself up into a polite ball. I grabbed the blanket my mother made for me from the closet and wrapped it around Bo's shoulders. I then climbed up next to her, setting the plastic tub in my lap. "The day my grandmother died, it broke my heart and an I lost a piece of my soul that I never understood. My grandmother was a staple of my life, and I never considered that she was human like the rest of us. That old age would eventually take her away, and take her to where my grandfather was waiting for since he passed away fifteen years before."

I opened the lid, setting it in the space between Bo and I. I dropped my eyes to the contents and kept on, sharing with Bo a piece of me that no one in my life ever saw, I was about to give her the history of my heart. "The day of her funeral, after we laid her next to my grandfather, I was sitting with my mother. We were talking, looking at pictures when all of a sudden my mother hands me this very old shoe box, shoved to the brim with old letters. Me being the history nerd, eagerly dove in and started reading them. I immediately recognized the hand writing as my grandfathers, the dates going all the way back to when he was in world war two. I skipped around, then I got to one of the very early ones and the dialogue was strange. My grandfather writing to my grandmother as if she was a casual pen pal, not the inevitable love of his life. I asked my mother about it, and with a smirk she revealed to me the family secret."

I picked up a letter, unfolding it gently and handing it over to Bo. "My grandparents never met, and yet they wrote each other every day. Falling in love at first sight, well first words." I glanced at Bo as she carefully read the yellowed piece of paper. "My grandmother never told anyone, claiming she didn't want my mother to go about love the way she did." I smiled at the memory of my shy grandmother, trying to hide her dirty, yet incredibly beautiful secret. "If she only knew she was going about love in the purist way it can exist. I wrote this script a thousand times, trying to find the perfect tone to fit their love story. This film is a piece of me, my thank you letter to my grandparents for giving me hope in true love."

Bo smiled as she read over a joke my grandfather had written, before handing the letter back. "These are amazing, Lauren."

I took it carefully, handing Bo the whole tub. "I only have his letters sent home, hers never survived the war since he was always moving around. But the story is there that you can fill in the blanks." I nodded as she took the tub nervously. "Go ahead, read them. They were the one thing that inspired me to write love stories. To find the love my grandparents had, one that blossomed out of a word, a first look, a first touch."

I swallowed hard, standing up from the bed and picking up the photograph of my grandparents on their wedding day. My grandfather looking dapper in his Army uniform, and my grandmother beyond smitten. I swiped some dust off the edges, and held it up for Bo. "He was a carpenter that built most of the city they lived in, and she was the best mother and grandmother. They loved each other unconditionally and wholly until the day he died." I nodded to the wooden elephant still sitting on the bed. "He made that and I keep it with me everywhere I go to never forget, never lose myself in this world I'm surrounded by." I sniffled, as my eyes blurred. "I hear them in the back of my head every time I see you Bo, telling me that the way my heart beats when I'm around you, is the same way theirs did when they got these letters, and they day they finally met, and every day after that for fifty years."

Bo set down the tub, looking at me as she held out her hand. "Lauren." She was smiling sheepishly, blinking back her own tears.

I took her hand, letting her pull me back into the bed, and into her arms. I let out a heavy breath, closing my eyes as I bury my face into her neck. "I love you, Bo. I can't run away from that, no matter how hard I try. I love you, and I'm going to make stupid mistakes as we start on this path, and I will do stupid things as I learn how to let you into my life." I paused, leaning back to look in her bright brown eyes. I smiled at her biting her bottom lip to try and hold back the shit eating grin that was about to explode. "You're my elephant, Bo. Don't let me forget how much I love you."

Bo pressed her palm against my cheek. "I won't as long as you leave your heart open for me."

I smiled, letting one tear slip down my cheek. Her thumb catching it and wiping it away. Bo bent forward kissing the corner of my mouth, before pulling me back into her arms and holding me tight. I held her just as tight, feeling a large weight lifted off of me, but there was a few more lingering. Primarily the weight of this new tabloid story and how bad it could end up being for all of us.

"Are you two interested in lunch? Or should I shove it in the oven to stay warm?" Effy's soft voice pushed through the heavy door.

I rolled my eyes, leaning out of Bo's arms to slid off the bed and open the door. Effy held up the take out containers, a cheeky smile on her face. "Lunch is the second most important meal of the day." She spoke, leaning to look over my shoulder at Bo, before glancing at me and whispering. "Appears you didn't cock it up too much."

I took the containers from her, my stomach quickly interested in the delicious smells emanating from them. "Have you started damage control?"

Effy scoffed at me. "You think I'm a lolly gagger? Of course I've started the damage control. Gillian and I are about to head off to my office and start vetting rats." She winked at me. "I've also drafted up a statement from you if the shit gets thicker. I will call a cast meeting at the end of break and go over the confidentiality agreement they all signed, and put some heat on a few suspects."

I raised my eyebrows. "You sound like a detective on the hunt, not my sassy assistant." I shifted the food in my hands. "I'm shutting my phone off for the rest of the day, I want to separate from the world and just be me. Maybe tomorrow too, depending on how I feel. So, please, come over only if it's an emergency, or if I run out of cherry coke."

Effy chuckled, leaning forward to speak so only her and I could hear it. "You should know I was a Detective Inspector for London Metro. Quit when I got this gig. Better pay, actual benefits, and I only work five months out of the year." She patted my shoulder when I gave her a shocked look. "You're wish is my command. No telephone, no email, no telegrams, nothing until the night after next." She stepped back to walk back down the hall. "I stocked the pantry with cases of that cherry coke, you should have enough to survive until the end of the week." Effy motioned to Bo sitting on the bed, gently fingering through the letters. "Take care of her, she's still very sick and putting up with your shit could put her in a coma. I've left enough food for you two to stay indoors, just follow the heat and serve instructions and try not to burn down the house." Effy blew me a kiss and sauntered off down the hall.

I closed the door behind her, leaning against and facing Bo. "What are your thoughts on lunch in bed with a movie?"

Bo looked up, smiling in that one way she only smiled when she was looking at me. "Sounds amazing." She tucked away the letters and closed up the tub before walking it back to the bookshelf. She slipped the tub back in its place carefully, and turned to face me. "Are we going to my room? I don't see a TV."

I grinned, setting the food on the side table next to my bed, reaching for a remote, I clicked a button. The chest at the end of the bed slid open and a massive large screen TV appeared. "Another secret of mine, I love watching movies in bed."

Bo laughed shaking her head and climbing back into the bed, picking the far side that was undisturbed. I climbed in after her, reaching into a drawer and pulling out tray tables. I opened one up and set it on her lap, then went about unwrapping our lunch of pasta from the Italian café down the street. Bo's eyes lit up as she saw the food. "I didn't realize how hungry I was until just now."

"Eat all you want. You need the energy." I handed her a napkin. "Let me know if you get tired, you can snuggle under the covers and rest." I turned to my food when Bo giggled.

I turned to look at her, she was holding my felt pillow man. "Are you sure he won't mind?"

I turned back to my food. "I think he would eagerly welcome me cuddling someone else than him. I tend to smash him when I fall asleep stressed out."

"Are you suggesting there might be cuddling after lunch?" Bo's voice dropped a few tones.

I closed my eyes as my face heated up. "Um. I uh." I stammered until I felt her lips press against my cheek. Kissing me softly.

"Relax. I'm still worried I'm going to get you sick. Cuddling is a fantasy right now." Bo leaned back, looking at the TV. "You want to pick the movie?"

I nodded, swallowing hard at the fact I blew it again. I could have easily take the green light Bo gave me, and cuddle the hell out of her after lunch. But I threw up that yellow light, and she politely backed off. "Sure." I flipped channels until I landed on a recent murder mystery film set in the forties.

Bo and I ate in silence, she finished all of her pasta, which brought on a coughing fit. I quickly cleaned up our lunch and grabbed her medicine. When I came back, I found her under the covers, clutching my pillow man. She had a mild look of pain on her face. I offered her the cough syrup and she took it eagerly. I slid into the bed next to her, sighing as it was the first time in a day and a half that I had actually lain in my bed. I had been sleeping on the couch or in a chair in my den. And then it was only cat naps. I turned the movie back on and watched, nitpicking and mentally noting ideas for a few other shots. I was lost in the movie, that I barely noticed Bo rolling over and slipping her arm around my waist. She snuggled deep into the side of my body, her head resting on my chest as she breathed out heavily. "You're so warm, Lauren. I don't care if you hate cuddles."

I smiled at her sleepy, cough syrup laden voice, and gently pulled her closer. Allowing her to find a more comfortable spot on me, and covered her hand on my stomach with mine. Bo fell asleep, snoring softly against my chest as I, and my pillow man, watched the rest of the movie.

This moment was perfect, worth shedding some of my steel layers. But I knew I had a long way to go, and I would fight for every step to stay on this path with Bo. Even if she was now drooling on my shirt.


	11. Chapter 11

**N: here's another one to hold you over for a few days or so. Enjoy it and tell me things! And if you want a book to tide you over for awhile, head over to amazon and look me up under Sydney Gibson and have a gander at a few of my books! I'm hoping to have a new one out in the coming months!**

* * *

(BO)

I woke up coughing lightly. Noticing my cough was less throaty, and less gross. A sign I might survive this horrible cold. I rolled around under the blankets and opened my eyes. Lauren was asleep next to me, propped up against a pile of pillows. Her chin tucked deep into her chest, glasses crooked and a notebook open on her lap. I smiled at the pen still clutched in her fingers. The poor woman never seemed to know when, or how to, stop working. I bit my bottom lip, Lauren looked adorable in this very peaceful state. It made me want to lean into her and cuddle up like I had last night.

I scooted to sit up, trying to be gentle and quiet. Lauren needed her sleep, I could tell she had been working on little to none for a few days. I knew it was partly my fault, and I wanted to remedy that. I leaned against the headboard, watching Lauren sleep for a minute, before I glanced at the notebook on her lap. I couldn't help but read it and saw that it was another script she was writing. My curiosity peaked, and I slid the notebook off her lap, eager to read what she had planned for her next film.

After a few pages, I was sucked into the script. A supernatural story that had all the right feels to be a huge blockbuster. I read quickly, loving the characters, the dialogue, and the thick plot line. Lauren was a rarity in the new world of film, she was able to create thick plot lines that people became invested in, but also created a world that could hold the attention span of anyone. Young, or old. I was halfway through the notebook, when I heard a raspy voice next to me.

"You'd have to audition. I don't give parts away." Lauren looked at me, her eyes smirking, even though her face was blank. "I made Gillian audition twice for Maggie. She still holds that over my head."

I swallowed nervously. How many more times would she catch me snooping? I closed the notebook and set it back on her lap. "I guess I better get an agent and set up a appointment with you." I smiled, wrapping my snooping hands into the heavy comforter. "The only character I'd want is the witch who dies in the first twenty pages."

Lauren yawned, stretching her arms over her head. When she did, her shirt rode up and revealed a lot of her bare stomach, making me sweat in a non plague addled way. Lauren was gorgeous and my libido was waking up now that it seemed my heart wasn't in danger of being broken. "Piper? Piper is an old side character that I may cut." She bent forward, cutting off my view of her stomach, and flipped open the notebook. "If anything, I'd have you audition for the ancient elder. Imogen."

I watched Lauren fall back into her nerdy creative zone, one that I had watched from afar on set. This was when she was in her true element. I listened to her as she described the character, interrupting her. "It's not a big deal, I probably will go back to local commercials after this film. I'm not sure if the entertainment business is eager for my return." I shrugged. I honestly had no idea how my performance was coming off, only see a few dailies here and there. Each of them made me cringe at how awkward I was at times, while the other cast members were blowing me away. I fidgeted with my hands nervously. "I'm a TV actor, not a feature film professional." I went to get out of the bed. "Are you hungry? I'm starving and really want oatmeal for some odd reason."

Lauren grabbed my elbow, pulling me back from exiting the bed. "Bo, are you crazy? You're incredible, you're doing an incredible job." She looked at me, straightening her black frame glasses. "I will admit, you were rough in rehearsals, the TV stage actor rearing its head. But then you fell into the groove, and all I can say is, are you ready for your life to change the second I've put this film in the can?" She held my gaze, her eyes very determined.

I shrugged, sliding closer to the blonde, sighing at the way her body heat was addictive. "The only thing that will change, is I will do a better job managing my paycheck." I found Lauren's hand, running my thumb over her knuckles. "I'm a tiny fish in a huge ocean. I've been down this road, Lauren. I know the fame won't last past fifteen minutes."

Lauren chuckled, shaking her head as she grabbed mine hand and covered it with both of hers. "My personal feelings for you aside, I, your director, am not lying when I say this is going to change your life. You're going to change your life, Bo. I mean it. You will be nominated for awards, you will be in the spotlight again, and I feel you will have agents begging you to work with them." She tugged me to come closer, and I allowed her to pull me into her arms. She kissed the top of my head. "I only hope you stick with me when your star rises again."

I slid my arms around her waist. "As if I would ever let you go again." I closed my eyes, listening to her heart beat, when it dawned on me. "I have one really big question I need to ask." Lauren hummed her response, making her chest vibrate against my ear. "How is it you're not sick and you've spent three days with me? I'm a walking runny nose, cough, and booger factory. And yet, you haven't sniffled, sneezed, or anything. What gives?"

"I had my DNA altered last year to mutate out the weak genes. I have the immune system of Superman, so I never get sick. It's the best ten million dollars I've ever spent." Lauren said it so monotone, I almost believed her, until she started laughing.

I playfully swatted her stomach. "Lauren, I'm serious."

"I know. Truth is, I have the money to eat right, the freedom to exercise as much as I want, and I can but the nice vitamins. Bottom line, I try very hard to take care of myself. Even if I only sleep a few hours a night, lately." Lauren let out a slow, content breath. "What do you want to do today? Besides eat oatmeal. I have the day set aside. The phones are off and I did some work while you were snoring and drooling like a beached seal."

I frowned, giving her a look as I swatted her again. "You're not really winning me over." Lauren smiled, shrugging and running a hand through my hair. I couldn't stay mad at her when she looked at me like that, or touched me like that. I chased the subtle stirrings of an awakening libido, focusing on some bland oatmeal. "Breakfast is the only thing I can think of right now. The rest I have to see. I feel better, but I'm not up to running around outside in the cold, or exercising with you." I slid out of her arms, scooting to the edge of the bed and getting up. "I'm new to this too, Lauren. My last relationship was caustic and smothering. I'm not used to having someone who lets me choose, or decide."

Lauren slipped out of the bed, making me take full notice of the fact she was wearing very tiny flannel shorts. Her long legs on display, making my mouth go completely dry. I stared at her as she moved about, tucking her notebook away. "I guess I can show you around the house. We can do laundry, since mine is piling up to an embarrassing level. Effy left us food, but whatever you fancy, I will get. Then maybe we can just sit, talk, watch things and get to know each other." She turned around, putting her glasses away in a case, and caught me staring at her like a rabid animal. I tipped my head down, busying myself with fixing the bed covers. "I'm not ignoring the last relationship comment, Bo. I want to know, but I won't push. It's not in my nature."

I nodded awkwardly. "It's nothing. I dated my co-star from the show on and off for a few years, until I went to casual dating. He was a jerk, but I had no one else that I could call when the nights felt too cold, and too empty." I scrunched up my face. Thinking about the past, why I never could settle down with him, or the Wynn's of the world. "He fed my ego, then stayed when reality knocked me down a few rungs. I just went with it. I didn't think I'd have something, someone better." I glanced at Lauren, intently staring at me. "Until now." I smiled sheepishly. "But deep down, I still have those thoughts."

Lauren stared at me. "Those thoughts stop right now, Bo. You're strong, intelligent, tough as nails, beautiful, and a force that I know I will have to reckon with a few more times as I fumble with this as well." She paused. "You deserve the best, Bo, and I hope I can give it to you." Lauren made a face. "That got a little too heavy on a empty stomach." She held out her hand, waving me over to where she stood. "Let's eat, then we can talk about everything we can think of."

I grinned, loving the way Lauren made me feel so strong. I had a reputation of all those things she said when I was at the top of the world, and it was still in me, but it was nice to hear it from someone I loved. Really loved, and loved me back. I walked around the bed, taking her hand. "Can we have eggs and oatmeal?"

Lauren squinted at me. "Yes. I mean it's a strange combination, but yes we can." She pulled me closer, sliding her arm around my waist. "And I hope that sudden subject change wasn't because of me. I meant what I said, I always mean what I say, Bo."

I shook my head, kissing the woman quickly. "I'm really hungry, Lauren. And the subject is done. Your words have given me enough reason to start putting the past away, especially when it's in regards to my heart." I kissed her again, slowly, smiling against her lips as she pulled me tighter against her body. Kissing Lauren was nothing short of incredible, and as she parted from me, cheeks flushed and her eyes sparkling with mischief, I wondered what it would be like if we moved further. I imagined it would be like a firestorm colliding with lightning. I grinned wider, swallowing down the building desire. "So, how about that oatmeal?"

Lauren groaned, stepping away as she pulled me behind her. "Note, feeding Bo will help keep her focused on other things. Hunger distracts her to a very frustrating degree."

I laughed at her tone, dropping my weight to make it harder for Lauren to pull me through the hallway. She finally gave up, turned on me and scooped me up into her arms and carried me into the kitchen. Grumbling with every step.

* * *

XXX

It was the last day of the break and I was pacing around the guest room, waiting for Bo to finish packing her things. We had spent the last few days getting to know each other. Talking, eating, watching crappy TV, cuddling in my bed, and making out a lot. Bo was sexy as hell when she was comfortable and confident. Never mind that she was gorgeous and I wanted to touch every inch of her. That's what usually started the intense make out sessions, my feverish need to touch her, but Bo or I would stop when things were about to go too far. It seems we both had old fashioned ideas about jumping into the bed naked. Truth was, Bo made me nervous to be with her. Which I found intriguing since I had always been suave with the ladies. Gillian could attest to my lackadaisical outlook towards casual sex. But Bo, Bo was different. She made my heart skip, my stomach wiggle, and my palms sweat when she stared at me for longer than three seconds. This feeling grew as I spent time with her, talking to her as Lauren the nerd, and not Lauren the award winning director. I was falling hard and deep for Bo, and it scared me like everything else about Bo. I feared sleeping with her would jinx this, and somehow the shitty karma that kept us apart, would appear. Bo just thought I was worried about her still being sick, even though she had almost completely recovered from the plague, a nagging sniffle being the only lingering sign she was ever sick. I was nervous for a weird reason, hence the pacing. I glanced at the clock. "Effy should be here in a few minutes, call me when you get home?"

Bo smiled, shoving a few shirts into one of my carry-on bags. "I will the second I walk in the door."

I nodded, starting another lap. I had decided at lunch to have Effy come and pick Bo up and take her home. That way no one would suspect why I was driving Bo anywhere. The gossip mill had settled down. Gillian and Effy hadn't found anyone to point fingers at yet, but we all agreed to be careful. "Tomorrow we will have a meeting with you and Gillian, go over this week's scenes." I blew out a slow breath. This was the week we started shooting the first kiss, and the first heavy petting scene. Next week, after Bo and Gillian were comfortable with each other, was the big love scene. I hated love scenes, I hated writing them, but hated directing them more. I always felt that I was towing the thin line between classy and all out porn, when I shot love scenes. "We'll go over the first kiss and the blocking of love scenes. Feel free to interject your thoughts, concerns, opinions." I kept my head down, chewing on my thumb.

"Lauren." Bo's voice was soft.

I waved a hand in the air. "It'll be a closed set, just basic crews and stuff." I closed my eyes. "I need to get with the lighting crew, make sure the lights aren't too hot." I turned on my heel, colliding with Bo standing in front of me. She grabbed my arms, shaking her head with a soft smile.

"Lauren, it's just a scene. Gillian means nothing to me, and its work. You can stop pacing." She slid her arms around my waist, sighing. "I will miss waking up to you."

I dropped my arms to settle around the brunette. I hated she thought I was nervous about her and another woman, when it was something completely different. Something she just said and it struck me. I was nervous because I had grown very attached to having Bo near me. I was nervous because tomorrow, when I woke up, she wouldn't be there. I let out a breath. "Can I tell you the truth?"

"Always." Bo leaned back to look at me, her million watt grin plastered on her face.

I smiled, running a hand down the side of her face. "Truth is I could give a shit about the love scenes. I know how horrible they are for actors, there's pleasure anywhere. Gillian is an ultimate professional and would never step across a line, although I might be jealous she gets to see you topless the same time I might." I paused, frowning at my words. "That came out way creepier than it sounded in my head." I shook my head as Bo giggled, nodding in agreement. "Anyway, I'm nervous because I'm going to really miss you in the morning. Miss having you around me. This whole week has been weird, but amazing, and I hate having to go back to a stupid reality where we have to be mindful of relationships in the workplace."

Bo leaned into my hand. "You wrote the contract I signed, you can easily break your own rules." She looked up at me, catching the panicked look in my eyes. "Lauren, don't. Let it go, don't have Effy go rewording the contract so we can be together." She reached up, grabbing my hand so she could lace her fingers in mine. "We have a job to do. A film to make, your dream to finish. We have day offs, the time after shooting and other upcoming breaks. I can handle being apart from you, when I get to see you every day." Bo gave me a curious look. "Banana."

"What?" I was confused. "You can take one from the kitchen on the way out, of you are craving bananas that bad."

Bo laughed, rolling her eyes. "No. Don't you remember my safe word the day you kidnapped me? Banana?"

I nodded, confused. "Yeah, you were high on cough syrup and antibiotics. I didn't really pay attention most of your incoherent ramblings."

Bo glared at me. "Not even when I told you I loved you?"

I blushed, squeezing her hand. "No, I heard that, and every time after." I met her eyes. "Explain banana before I dig my hole deeper."

Bo sighed, smiling. "I was thinking that if you wanted a moment alone on set, or whatever, we can say banana. It'll be our secret word, cue, to stop and find a moment to have to ourselves. That way no one will catch on that we are having a torrid affair." Bo laughed when I gave her a dirty look, making her lean closer to me and whisper against my ear. "You can use the word whenever you want to see me topless. It's a shame you didn't tell me earlier, I would have made sure you got a first look before anyone else." She turned, kissing me softly on the skin under my ear, sending shivers throughout my whole body.

I swallowed hard. "Bo." I grabbed a handful of her old sweatshirt, so tempted to pull it over her head and fight my nerves. "You make it so hard…."

Bo brushed her lips across my cheeks, whispering. "You make it so easy, Lauren." She kissed the corner of my mouth, looking up with a smirk.

I bent forward, kissing her hard, my hands twisting the material in frustration. Bo kissed me back, harder, moaning into my mouth and short circuiting every cautious thought that had been residing there for the last week. I let go of her sweatshirt the second I felt her hand slip under my old t-shirt. Her palm hot against my skin as her fingers ventured past the waistband of my jeans, grazing my very sensitive stomach. I shivered, but didn't break from her. I reached with both hands, grabbing that damned sweatshirt, readying to rip it over Bo's head.

"Oy! I should've knocked, or announced myself." Effy's voice was strained, as if she was grossed out. "I feel like I walked into soft core film."

Bo and I broke apart like a bucket of cold water was thrown on us. Bo turned away from Effy and I, fixing her sweatshirt. I immediately turned to Efy, giving her the dirtiest of looks. Effy winked at me, her cheeks flushed with mild embarrassment. "Learn to manage your time better, Lauren. You know I'm always early." She pointed at the clock, she was indeed five minutes early. "You tell me a time, I arrive five ahead." She waved for me to follow her as she called out to Bo. "I'll be in the kitchen with Lauren, I need to hand off the new schedule. Meet me in there when you're all set."

Bo nodded, her back still turned to us. "Thanks, Effy." Her voice cracked, making me swallow hard. We had gotten very close to the point of no return, and it made me hate my very punctual assistant.

I followed Effy out, closing the door behind me to give Bo a moment to collect herself. "Jesus."

"Don't bring him into this, you naughty one." Effy walked with a rushed pace, handing me a thin packet. "Here is the new schedule. Everyone will be getting it by tonight. We are still on track for the girls shoots this week, the boys will be off with the second team doing the boy shoots." Effy walked into the kitchen, heading towards the fridge and opening it. She grinned when she saw Bo and I had eaten almost everything she left. "Seems you two didn't suffer from cabin fever?"

I rolled my eyes, tossing the packet on the island as Effy slid me a cherry coke. "We stayed in. She isn't a hundred percent better from the cold."

Effy cocked an eyebrow. "Oh, and I guess you were taking her temperature with your tongue just now, Dr. Lewis?"

I closed my eyes, groaning. "Effy." I opened them to find the former detective chuckling at me. "First off, tell me if you and Gillian have any news on the tabloid front. Second, when you take Bo home, don't embarrass her anymore. Third, when you come back for our meeting, I want you to start off by telling me about being a detective and how that never made the resume."

Effy grabbed an apple from the bowl in front of her. "All's quiet in lala land. But we think when filming starts back up, the tabloids will be back at it. I won't say a peep to Bo about you and her. I'm just happy that it seems you've relaxed your arse and embraced love." She leaned across the counter. "Third. Maybe, depends if you tell me all about your week of discovering that heart in your chest is in there for more reasons than pushing blood around your bits and digits."

I chuckled shaking my head, when Bo's hand fell to the small of my back. I turned to look at her, instantly smiling. "You're all set?"

Bo nodded, setting the duffle bag on the island. "Yep." She looked at Effy. "Thanks for driving me home, I don't mean to be any trouble."

Effy waved her off, grabbing the bag from the counter. "I'm getting paid either way, so it's not an issue." She winked at the both of us. "I'll be standing over in the cubby, say your goodbyes. I have a schedule to keep and Bo needs to be home by ten, per her contract." Effy grinned, rushing off to the small cubby right outside the kitchen.

I frowned. "I really need to look at those contracts."

Bo shook her head, moving to stand in front of me. "Lauren, leave it." She placed both hands on the side of my face. "I love you, I will miss you, and I will see you first thing in the morning." She leaned forward, kissing me softly, before leaning back. "Thank you. Thank you for kidnapping me, taking care of me, cuddling and everything. This has meant the world to me, Lauren, getting to know you and have this chance."

I grinned, my heart fluttering around like an idiot. "I love you, Bo. I will miss you and probably won't sleep until the next time I have you in my bed, and you're smothering me." I kissed the corner of her mouth before pulling her into a hug. "Thank you, Bo, now and every day after as we do this. I know it won't be easy, but I hope you know I'm in this with you. For better or for worse."

Bo squeezed my ribs. "That's the second time you've made a marriage reference." She leaned back, studying me. "Is there something you want to tell me?"

My eyes grew wide, Freudian slips be damned. "Um. I."

"And that's that. Time to go, Bo. We can't be late or this one will dock your pay for missing curfew." Effy came out of the cubby, gently grabbing Bo's elbow. "You will have plenty of time to discuss Lauren's slip of the tongue at lunch tomorrow, hopefully while you two aren't trying to slip each other the tongue."

Both Bo and I gave Effy a dirty look, which was ignored as Bo was dragged away from me. Bo started laughing, turning around after blowing me a kiss and left the house with Effy rattling off the schedule for tomorrow, and what time the car would be picking her up.

It only took three minutes before the silence of the huge house became too much, forcing me to leave the kitchen and head to my den. I didn't think twice, just sat down at my desk and started working. Chasing out the silence and the dull ache missing Bo, and filling it with schedules and script revisions.

Tomorrow morning couldn't come fast enough.


	12. Chapter 12

**N: another quick one, but i wanted to get this up before i have to disappear for a few days. Work, books, and other shitty life stuff i have to deal with in rl. Never get into a serious car accident, it truly screws up your world in many ways. Physically, emotionally, and legally. Hence why i've been a bit reclusive and not very chatty. Anyway, here's a quick nothing chapter that will lead to a better chapter that will take some time to write. Read on, enjoy, review and what not!**

* * *

"Welcome back! We hope the break was restful and some of you got to see the sights." Effy sat next to me as I nursed a bottle of cherry coke and tried my damndest not to stare at Bo. Who I could feel was struggling with the same as she sat next to Gillian and Elizabeth. I glanced over at Wynn who was next to Alan, looking like a wet dog left out all night. I smiled at him as he smiled and nodded my way. I felt bad for the guy, but.

"You will see your contract stipulations are laid out in front of you. Lauren and the production offices wanted to have us go over the details you all eagerly signed off on." Effy held up a sheet of paper with bright yellow highlighter covering most of the page. "Please read over section four, the confidentiality agreement you agreed to. This is an all inclusive section, which means no one should be sharing anything with an unauthorized press source." Effy smiled tightly, staring each cast member in the eyes like the stone cold detective she once was. "I.E. tabloids, and paparazzi. Lauren keeps a tight ship for many reasons. To protect her work, and to protect her cast. Many of you have had awful experiences with the media, and understand the why." Effy set the page down. "We are all aware of the brewing tabloid story about Bo and Wynn here." She waved at the two, who both tipped their head down in awkward embarrassment.

"Effy, I had nothing to do with that." Wynn spoke firmly, glancing at Bo. "I would never spill such a thing, especially about a close friend of mine." He smiled tightly. "I had my agent release a statement to that tabloid, confirming Bo and I are just simply great friends. Nothing more." He stared at Bo who would only smile softly at him, before turning back to the pages in front of her. Wynn turned to me. "I apologize, Lauren, for any upset this might have caused in production."

I nodded, keeping my director face firmly on. "You don't need to apologize, Wynn. Effy here was able to root out the source of the leak, and should be taking care of it by the end of the day." I scanned the room as Effy taught me, trying to pick up on a reaction from anyone in regards to the tiny lie I just issued. Truth was, we still had no damn idea who the leak was, and so we were relying on old police tactics to push out the rat. I looked at Gillian who gave me one of her silent looks, before turning to the page in front of me. "I hate that we have to go over this. I have a good sense of trust in all of you as a team, and know that this might be a huge life changing opportunity for most of you." I looked at Bo, smiling as she caught my eyes. "But. I have to address things as they come up." I looked away from Bo before it became evident that I was staring. This was going to be hard working with her and keeping it work related. "So, any questions?"

Everyone shook their heads no. Effy let out a content noise and moved onto the next thing. "Alright, that satisfies that nonsense. Let's move to schedules." She tapped on the pile in front of her. "The next three weeks are going to be hectic. Gillian and Bo, this whole week you will be shooting Maggie and Annie solo scenes." She pointed at the two ladies. "That means, shower every day. Smell pretty for one another and make sure to check in and out with the continuity team as we break up the scenes over a few days."

I gave Effy a dirty look as Gillian chuckled. Effy ignored me and kept on. "Boys, you will be working with the second unit on battle scenes and pub scenes. Which means you all get to practice being drunk, drunk on apple juice and sparkling cider." She flipped a few pages. "Karen and Elizabeth, you will also be working with the second unit and the boys." She lifted her head up, looking at the cast as they scribbled notes. "And as most of you know at the table, Lauren does closed sets when she does love scenes. So, please obey the red light and stay away from set five. The more undisturbed time, the quicker we can get through the scenes." She looked at me. "Anything to add Lauren?"

I smiled, shaking my head at how efficient and in charge my assistant was. "Nope. I actually am curious why you even needed me here, you ran the meeting better than I could." I grabbed my cherry coke bottle.

"Yes, but seeing your face in the morning lights up all of our lives, love." Gillian winked at me from across the table. "Looks like you had a refreshing break along with the rest of us."

It was Gillian's turn to receive a dirty look. "I worked through break. Wrote a new script that you will have to audition for at least four times." I stood up from the table, collecting my notes. "Anyway, we have call time in an hour, so everyone head off to wardrobe and makeup." I looked up at a still giggling Gillian, Bo sitting with her head buried in making notes. "Gillian, Bo, I will meet you on the set in an hour. We'll go over the first kiss scene, and see where the day takes us."

Gillian yawned, standing up to stretch. "Mhm. First kiss scenes. My least favorite despite how pretty my co-star is."

I cocked my head, giving Gillian a silent what the hell? Look. She gave me one of hers telling me that she would fill me in as the rest of the cast stood up from the table, talking amongst themselves, filing out of the room. Bo stood up, clutching her notes to her chest, and turned to face Gillian. "I'll make sure to brush my teeth, wouldn't want you kissing a foul mouth."

Gillian laughed, patting Bo on the shoulder. "Feisty. I like it. Looks like the break had you finding new inspiration."

Bo chuckled, looking over at me. "It definitely had me finding many things." She winked at me, and walked out of the room, leaving me with Gillian and Effy.

I quickly closed the door and leaned against it, glaring at the two wonder twins. "What the hell you two? Seriously!" I pointed at Gillian. "Why are you flirting with Bo like a teenage boy in heat?" I then pointed at Effy. "And you, adding fuel to this redhead to burn."

Gillian laughed, sitting down on the edge of the table. "It's called laying a trap, Lauren. Detective Effy here came up with it. Since we can't overtly find the leak, we decided to lay a trap. I flirt with Bo, like flirt with her in the most over the top of the way around the cast, and see what slips onto the front page. It's called process of elimination."

I frowned, looking at the women as my jaw twitched. "It's a shitty idea."

"It's only a shitty idea because you wanted to punch me in the stomach just now for being cheeky with your lady." Gillian raised her eyebrows. "Which means my acting is still impeccable."

"I don't like it." I stood up from the table, glaring right at Effy. "But I trust you. This better work, and it better not make things worse." I went to leave the room, fuming internally about this new struggle. The separation of workplace and romance, especially when I worked extremely close to the one I was romancing. "Gillian, be on set in a half hour. I want to shoot the first kiss asap and move on. I want this week to be over." I left the room, barely catching Effy call after me that she had everything under control. That was fine if she did, I didn't and it was starting to bother me.

* * *

XXX

I sat in the shadows with Effy at my side. The set was closed, just Bo, Gillian, Effy, my best cinematographer and the head makeup girl, and I were the only ones allowed as we shot the first kiss scene. I had called action and was watching as the girls went through the dialogues. The pitch of emotions was perfect, Bo and Gillian were on point with their performance. I could feel the heavy tension about to break between the two characters. I had opted to film versus doing a rehearsal. I wanted the first kiss to be as real as it could be. Awkward, intense and knowing Gillian, breathtaking.

I watched, holding on dearly to my director hat as the scene progressed. I had to keep telling myself that it was Annie and Maggie, not Bo and Gillian. It worked as I locked onto Bo's eyes, noting they lacked the spark they had whenever she looked at me. I shifted in my chair, swallowing hard as the dialogue edged into the kiss.

"They're both professionals." Effy whispered next to my head. I sighed, nodding as I clenched my jaw. Gillian moving in for the kiss and in a blink of an eye, she was kissing Bo. And Bo was kissing her back. I shook my head, no, Annie and Maggie were kissing and it was beyond any of my hopes, as the two actors embraced the tension of their characters. Pouring all the emotion into the very intense, passionate, breathtaking kiss. It was perfect, and yet I was clutching the arm of the chair. Holding back from shouting cut and pushing the two women apart. I wasn't jealous, nope. Not at all. Who would be watching their ex kiss their current love with such fervor, the room temperature went up about fifteen degrees.

Finally, Gillian parted, delivering the last line of the scene we had blocked out, giving me carte blanche to shout cut. I leaned over to the cinematographer, having him give me the thumbs up. He smiled at me. "Got it all in one take. It's perfect, but I'll have it in ten minutes if you want to look it over."

I nodded. "Yeah, sure." I cleared my throat, looking at Gillian standing a fair distance away from Bo, chatting. "If you think it's one take, I trust your instinct, Tom. But let's review in ten? And if it's a lock, we'll move onto the following scene since the girls are still in costume. Saves us time on continuity."

Tom nodded and shuffled off to download the footage. I turned around, my back to the girls and was staring at a fake steel wall. I was taking a few deep breaths, analyzing this odd feeling in my stomach. Was this jealousy? Was I really jealous over a fake kiss? Or was it pent up feelings of not having Bo next to me in the morning, nor having a second alone with her all day?

"Lauren? Are you good?" Effy appeared in front of me, shoving a cherry coke into my hand.

I quickly opened the bottle and took a huge sip. "Yup. Fine." I clenched my jaw tighter, staring at my assistant.

She frowned slightly. "Perhaps my Cagney and Lacey undercover sting idea, wasn't such a great idea. I fear it's planted a few jealousy seeds into you head."

I shook my head, trying to smile. "It's not that. I understand why you and Gillian went that route. It'll get results." I looked over my shoulder, Bo talking to the makeup girl as she fixed smeared lipstick. "I know she's mine, but this is harder than I thought."

Effy patted my shoulder. "I know, but they're professionals. Gillian would never do anything devious. Bo is doing a great job pretending to like kissing the redhead, but after what I saw yesterday when I interrupted you and her. It's truly a fake kiss, her body language is completely different."

I swallowed hard, playing with the cap on the bottle. "I'm thankful for your detective skills." I glanced up at her as Tom walked over, handing me a tablet.

"It's all set, Lauren. The whole scene is about five minutes, and it's perfect." He smiled at me. "I'm going to go set up the second set. Let me know if you want to re-shoot."

I nodded, smiling as I took the tablet. I glanced over at Bo, my heart wanting her to be near. "Um, I'm going to Tom's office to watch this. Let's take ten, let the girls go get something to eat." I smiled softly as she made eye contact. "Also, can you tell Bo there's bananas at the craft table, she's been craving them all week."

"Of course." Effy took the script pages I had crumpled up out of stress, smoothing out as she walked over to Gillian and Bo. I waited until she told Bo about the banana's, watching her face light up, before I turned and walked towards the quiet, dark office Tom was using to review footage.

I closed the door behind me and turned on the small desk lamp. I didn't need much light. I preferred watching the dailies in darkness so I could pick up on lighting issues within a scene. I sat down on the chair, leaning forward as I pressed play on the tablet. Within seconds I was sucked into the scene, and how utterly perfect, beautiful it was. Tom was right, we had gotten it in the first shot, and there was no way I would ever be able to capture the emotion pouring out of Bo and Gillian. I watched, finally able to watch as the director and not feel weird.

I was lost in the scene, when the door creaked open. I looked up to see Bo sneaking through the door and closing it quietly. I sat up, showing her the tablet. "I was just reviewing the scene. You guys are amazing." I went to stand up from the chair, setting the tablet down on the desk for Bo to take a look, when a warm body suddenly collided against me. Bo's hands landing on the side of my face as her mouth covered mine, kissing me hard. I had to grab her hips to steady myself, kissing the woman back with equal force. Bo pressed harder against my mouth, asking for more by running her tongue along my bottom lip. I moaned, giving her exactly what she wanted, pulling her hips harder, desperate to pull her closer to me. She rocked her hips against mine, slamming us into the edge of the desk. I tangled my hands in the thick woolen fabric of her costume, cursing the heavy cloth for preventing me from touching her skin.

I soon felt Bo's hands run up my sides, her palms cupping the sides of my breasts. I whimpered, biting her bottom lip as things were starting to get really, really hot and hazy. My knees buckled when her leg insinuated itself between mine, and pressed up. The simple movement sent a shock wave through my entire body, making me moan and part from her mouth. I took deep breaths, calming my pounding heart, and opened my eyes. That's when I realized what we were doing, where we were doing it. "Bo, stop."

Bo was kissing the underside of my jaw, nipping at the skin. I removed my hands from her hips, placing them on the side of her face to reluctantly pull her from my sensitive skin. "Bo. We can't. Not here."

Bo was breathing heavily, licking her lips and staring at me. She sucked in a slow breath, nodding and taking a step back as she looked around the office. "I'm sorry, I couldn't resist." She tugged at her uniform top. "It was driving me insane, knowing you were watching me. And when I caught your eyes, the burning jealousy in them, I almost lost it." She reached for the light switch, flicking it on, making the room painfully bright. Bo looked at me, smiling softly. "That was, yeah, I lost my mind, didn't I?"

I leaned against the edge of the desk, nodding. "But I'm okay with it." I smiled. "Bananas."

Bo grinned sheepishly, biting her bottom lip. "Bananas back at you." She ran the back of her hand across her forehead. "I'm sorry for attacking you, but I need you to know. I'm yours, only yours." She cleared her throat, her voice still thick with desire. "Gillian can kiss, but she's not you." She leaned over to look in the small mirror hanging next to the door. "You think anyone will notice I was just making out with you?" She wiped at her smeared lipstick, doing her best to wipe away any signs of what happened.

I sighed, trying to calm my heart and libido down. Good lord was Bo a firestorm, in a good way. I found my legs and shoved away from the desk, walking over to Bo. I grabbed her shoulders, gently turning around as I picked up a lens wipe cloth from the packet on the desk next to us. I held Bo's chin as I began wiping away lipstick. "Effy and Gillian will know instantly, but the rest. They won't have an idea. Well, that depends on what you told them your reason for coming in here with me?"

Bo smiled, leaning into my hand. "I told them I wanted to see how bad I was, that this was my first on screen kiss with a lady." She smiled, taking the cloth from my hand. "You have lipstick all over your face." She reached up, wiping at my face.

I gave Bo a look. "This is your first kiss with a girl on screen?"

Bo nodded. "Mhm. First time." She smirked. "But I kept thinking about you. Kissing you, and it kept the nerves away." She cocked an eyebrow. "It also did very little to keep my libido in check, hence needing to have a moment with you." Bo dropped her hand away. "There, no more lipstick." She took a step back, dropping the wipe into a trashcan. "So, what are your plans for tonight?"

I frowned, the tone in Bo's voice was laden with promise of an adventurous night. "I have work. Meaning I have late night meetings with the PR department, then a skype call with my mother." I picked up Bo's hand, letting our fingers lace together. "It's going to be like this for the next few days. The only night I have free is Friday." I saw the mild sadness in her eyes. "You can come to the house Thursday after the big scene and stay with me. You're off on Friday, if we get the love scene in a few takes."

Bo smiled tightly, squeezing my hand. "This work stuff is seriously getting in the way."

"I know, but we'll make it work." I looked up at Effy's voice coming towards the office. "We should get back, before someone gets suspicious."

Bo nodded, letting my hand go and reaching for the door. As she opened it, we were greeted with Effy's awkward smile. "Perfect! The others are just filing back from break." She looked between both of us, the detective immediately picking up that something was amuck. "I hope the scene is up to your standard? Can we move on, Lauren?"

I nodded, letting Bo walk out of the office, giving us a little more space. "Yes, it's done. In the can. Tell Tom we can go on to the next scene." I cleared my throat. "Uh, Bo, we'll be moving over to set five. If you want to go read over the pages for scene eighteen? Get ready?"

Bo smiled. "Of course." She held my eyes. "Thank you for showing me the scene, makes me feel like I'm doing a decent job." She turned to Effy, who was looking at her in a very awkward, knowing way. "I'll, um, be going now." Bo's cheeks turned a bright red as she walked away.

When Bo was out of ear's reach, Effy spun around on me. "First, you still have lipstick on your cheek. Second, you're lucky this is a closed set and I was the only arsehole who didn't run off to the craft table." She poked me in the shoulder. "You cannot be naughty in closed offices. You and Bo make way too much noise, and for a second there, I thought I would have to call an early lunch." Effy licked her thumb, reaching over to scrub away at my cheek. "No shagging on set. It's in the contracts, the one you wrote."

I leaned away from Effy, swatting her hand away. "Stop that. And I know. I know all about the god damn contracts." I straightened out my shirt, looking in the mirror. I didn't look to disheveled, just a little excited, and I could pass that off as excitement from a well done scene. "We don't make too much noise." I pushed past my assistant, walking back out to the set.

Effy chuckled. "You do. Panting and moaning like hyper dogs in heat." She reached behind her tapping on the office walls. "These are paper thin, not made of steel and sound proof foam." She kept on my heels, handing me the next scenes pages. "I can only imagine what's going to happen when we get to the major love scene, if a simple kiss is going to light up the horny devils in you and Bo."

I frowned, glaring at Effy. "Stop it." I turned my focus to the pages in my hand. "Nothing is going to happen, I have this under control."

Effy laughed out loud, slapping me on the back. "You certainly do, Lauren. You have this completely under control." She continued laughing as we walked onto the next set. "You are funny, you should write a comedy next."

I frowned deeper, looking up to make direct eye contact with Gillian who gave me one of her silent looks. The one that told me I was going to get another round of shit from her the second we were alone. I shook my head at her, earning another dirty look before I turned to look at Bo.

She was reading pages, but when she lifted her head up and our eyes met, I felt the firestorm roll over me. Making me swallow down a dry throat. I let out a slow breath, my heart pounding as my memory flashed over what just occurred in the office.

I knew I was in trouble, and by the end of the week, something was going to explode between Bo and I. I sighed, this was bad. There was already so much sexual tension between us, that it was almost crippling. God forbid what would happen when I finally saw her topless.

I groaned, rubbing at my temples. This was going to be a long week.


	13. Chapter 13

**N: another chapter of nonsense. Updates will be slower as i start full steam on getting angel ready for publication. I have to finish the ending as we edit, but! shooting for a may/june release! anyway, read this mess as i watch some golden girls and eat popcorn.**

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I stared at the finger I had chewed until it bled. My stress was reaching a unique level as I walked towards Effy waiting for me at the entrance to the set. The week of love scenes was taking its toll on me, and not in the way one would suspect. It was because of watching Bo and Gillian, it was because the studio executives were wanting to add another one later in the film. I had fought, saying that the one and a half I'd written was plenty. The last handful of my nights were spent in my den on the phone, or skyping California. I was tired, stressed and missed Bo.

Ever since making out in the office, I craved her more than I thought was humanly possible. But my hectic schedule managing the other side of being director, kept me away from her. We only shared basic conversation. There were plenty of banana moments to the point Alan thought we were both potassium deficient with how much we said we both wanted a banana. I would message her at night, and be disappointed when I finally got off the phone with the west coast, she was asleep. I couldn't wait for the end of the week when we were done with the love scenes, and the shooting schedule went back to normal. Back to epic combat scenes with huge amounts of fake blood and tears. The simple things.

"You look like you could use a cigarette, or a whiskey." Effy gave me a soft smile, handing a cold bottle of cherry coke.

I took it eagerly, nodding. "I need both." I pushed the sunglasses I wore up onto the top of my head. I had rushed out the house in clothes I found lying on the back of chair. Effy's critical eye took notice of this. I frowned, taking the notes she held out. "I was running late, be glad I showered." I flipped over the pages. "We all set for this scene?" I scanned over notes from Tom.

"We are. Bo and Gillian are waiting for you." She motioned to both ladies sitting on the large bed, dressed in bathrobes laughing.

I swallowed hard at the sight of Bo in a bathrobe. I could see a large amount of bare skin before the top of her thigh disappeared behind fluffy white terry cloth. "Hopefully this won't take all day." I glanced at Effy as she handed me another print out. I took it, thinking it was more notes, but frowned when I saw it was an online tabloid article.

"We haven't narrowed down who it is, but we now have a suspect list." Effy quietly spoke next to me.

My jaw clenched as I read over the headline about Gillian, Bo and Wynn. A possible three way romance? The entire article was filled with snippets about Gillian's over the top flirting on set. Followed by pictures of the three standing outside their trailers, talking. I let out a heavy sigh, handing the article back. "This needs to be taken care of as soon as you can."

Effy nodded as we met with Tom. "It will be. Upside? The interest in this movie has grown exponentially. The studio would like you to do a press tour next week down in London. You and the lead cast. They feel it will keep the steam rolling." She handed me an email with a schedule.

I sighed again, rubbing my temples. "I haven't even thought about the promotional pictures, or poster designs. They're jumping the gun." I crumpled up the email and threw it on the floor. "Call Barton in the art department, tell him I need emergency designs for the poster. I'll meet up with him Friday to go over what he has."

Effy scribbled on her notepad. "Done." She then motioned to Bo and Gillian who were looking at me. "Shall we?"

I closed my eyes, trying to de-stress. "Yes. Let's get this love scene over before I grow unbearable." I opened my eyes, looking over at Bo shyly smiling at me. I smiled back, walking over to my seat next to the camera. "Let's go." I patted Tom on the back before scooting forward and looking at my ladies. "You both have gone over this scene, rehearsed the little dialogue. This is pretty cut and dry, we did the hard part yesterday with blocking out movements. We'll roll film for this first run, see how it feels for the both of you and go from there." I sucked in a breath as Gillian's green eyes asked if I was okay. I nodded once before leaning back in the chair. "If either of you feel uncomfortable, call cut and we'll discuss."

Gillian stood up, disrobing and showing what the good god gave her to the small crew. Of course, she wore the nude colored covers on her lower half that really did nothing to cover much, but Gillian was not afraid of anything. Including being nude, something I had become intimately knowledgeable in when we dated. It was impossible for the woman to stay clothed. She glanced at Bo as she climbed onto the bed, pulling back the sheets to allow Bo some privacy. "No worries, Bo. This isn't going to be fun, the lights get very hot, and no matter what, we're being watched." She grinned.

Bo laughed nervously and moved towards the bed. The day before we had blocked it out that Gillian would do most of the nudity as Bo was still apprehensive about being partially nude for the first time in her career. She would be primarily under the covers, Gillian being the bolder one in life and in the film. Bo shrugged off the bathrobe and climbed onto the bed. I caught a glimpse of her bare back before I tipped my head down, watching the bathrobe gather in a ball on the floor, nervous to look up at Bo. I wanted to see her, but not this way, it felt strange and intrusive. I swallowed hard and looked up when Tom asked if I was ready. Bo was firmly tucked under the sheets, taking in a deep breath as Gillian moved into position. I nodded, squeezing the arm of the chair as I called action.

For however many minutes it took, I sat uncomfortable in my seat. Watching Gillian and Bo act out the pivotal love scene. I watched, forcing myself to stay in director mode, trying to see if the tone was correct. I finally called cut when the first run was through. I let out a breath of relief when Gillian and Bo immediately separated and covered up. I leaned over to Tom, asking to see what he got.

I frowned when the scene was good, but could be better. There wasn't enough passion in the performance. It felt like Annie and Maggie were just an old married couple, not first time lovers. I stood up slowly, moving towards the bed. I glanced at the two women. "How do you feel?"

Gillian frowned, tugging the sheet over her chest. "I hate when you ask that. It means you're not happy with the results." She looked at Bo. "She's about to question our motivation, our emotions, and whatnot. Be prepared."

Bo chuckled nervously, holding the sheet tighter across her body. "What's wrong with it, Lauren?"

I stared into the brown eyes that I adored, wishing I could tell her that I wanted to take her away from this set. Take her to my house and show her personally what passion in the bed looked like, felt like. But I couldn't. I was her director right now, not the woman stupidly in love with her. "It's lacking the proper emotion." I sighed, running a hand through my hair. "This is Annie's first time with Maggie. It's been weeks upon weeks of pent up tension. Tension about to explode like the bombs dropping all around you. You and Maggie realize how dangerous this is, how dangerous the world you live in is right now. So, you both feel that this is your first and only chance to have the forbidden. It's the only time either of you feel complete in a fractured world."

Gillian sighed, sitting up. "Sounds like someone should trade places with me."

I glared at her. "I need you both to find the tone. The tone you had in the first kiss scene." I returned to Bo after successfully shooting a thousand daggers into Gillian's green eyes. "Bo, how are you feeling comfort wise? Is there anything you want to add, take away?"

Bo shook her head, looking in my eyes with such an intensity, it had my knees shaking. "Nope. I think you explained the motivation perfectly. Something I can relate to." She bit her bottom lip before looking at Gillian. "Let's go again. The quicker we get through this, the quicker I can put my warm clothes back on."

Gillian laughed, shifting back into the starting position, looking my way. "You think you could turn the heat up, Lauren? Or do you prefer my nipples to cut glass?"

I groaned, closing my eyes before I turned and walked away. "Effy, can you please adjust the heat?" I flopped down in my seat, extremely frustrated on a multitude of levels. I wanted this scene to be over, and I wanted to be alone with Bo. I missed her and now I ached for her.

I waved at Tom as Effy came to stand next to me. "Heats been adjusted. Gillian's nipples will be happy in a minute."

"Perfect." I rolled my eyes, calling action and slumping down in my seat as take two started.

I watched again. Noting that the tone between the two had shifted. There was more passion in this take, a little more emotion and less going through the motions. I relaxed a little, knowing if this stayed on course, this scene would be done in this take or the next. I leaned forward in my chair, listening to the pieces of dialogue, when all of a sudden Bo pushed Gillian up and the bed sheet covering her fell away. Leaving Bo's chest completely uncovered.

I swallowed hard, my eyes immediately drawn to the incredible beauty of Bo as she pushed the passion of the scene. But unfortunately, my brain had shut down at the sight before me, the only thing I could think of to do was pull my sunglasses down and cover my eyes. The last thing I needed was anyone noticing I was staring at Bo's breasts, and not watching the scene.

Good lord was she perfect. I had to grasp the poor wooden arm rest to funnel out the heat rising in my body. The scene went to a different place from what we blocked out the day before, but as much as it was difficult to watch, it was perfect for the film.

I started chewing on my bloodied finger, when Effy leaned down to whisper in my ear. "Are you okay, Lauren?"

I nodded chewing harder. "Yup."

"You're very flush. Could it be the fact you're looking at the tits of Christmas past pressed against the tits of Christmas future before you even had a chance to unwrap that present?" She nodded towards Bo.

"I hate you, Effy." I hissed the words out, not wanting anyone else to hear it. I also hated that Effy sensed I'd yet to see Bo naked. "You know too much sometimes."

"You adore me, and blame my keen detective skills. Not that it was hard to guess when your eyes grew to the size of tractor wheels when Bo slipped a nip. But should I call lunch the second you call cut? So you can have a moment in Tom's office?" Effy snickered.

I cleared my throat, closing my eyes and shutting off the view I'd been torturing myself with. I waited until the last piece of dialogue fell out of Bo's breathless mouth and called cut. My voice cracking in a prepubescent way. I stood up quickly, turning my back on the two so I could talk to Tom. He was excited, showing me the playback on the camera. "It's another great scene. Perfect in tempo, tone, and sensuality." He and I watched the footage until Bo's sheet fell away. I felt my stomach flutter as I caught another glimpse of her. I opened them slowly, forcing myself to watch the scene. He was right, the two women had come through for me, and created a beautiful scene that would leave everyone feeling something.

"It's great, Tom. We can put this one to bed." I returned to my sore finger, gnawing on it. "We can call it a day. I thought this scene would take longer today. This actually puts us ahead again, so go home and spend some time with your wife."

Tom grinned, nodding as he walked back to the camera to save the footage. I turned to Bo and Gillian, back in their bathrobes and chatting. "That's a wrap for today." I cleared my throat, shaking out the slight tremble in it. "You both did amazing and the scene is perfect." I waved a nervous hand around, trying not to look at Bo, or I would attack her. "Go change, and the rest of the day is yours to have. I think Alan and Karen were planning a cast dinner tonight, if either of you are interested in that."

Gillian stood up from the bed, tightening her bathrobe closed, and walked over to me. "Are you okay, Lauren? You seem all out of sorts, which is rare for you when you're on set." She squinted at me. "Why the sunglasses? This set is almost pitch black."

I shrugged nervously, looking over her shoulder at Bo chatting with Effy. "Nothing is wrong. I'm fine. I have a headache." I tapped the side of sunglasses nervously. "That's it." I moved to chewing on my thumb, since the finger I had been chewing on, was sore and raw. "I'm fine."

Gillian's smirk faded. "Is it the tabloid thing?" She glanced back at Bo. "You know that's all bullocks created by Detective Effy and I? Bo is even playing along to help root out the arse with the loose lips." Gillian looked at me softly. "Bo loves you, through and through." She went to pull off my sunglasses, catching the look in my eyes. She grinned. "I know my breasts are spectacular, you told me many a time. But I know this look. It's the look you get when you see tits for the first time. You're all squirrely because this is the first time you've seen more than an ankle on your gal, right?"

I shrugged again, moving away from my thumb to chew on my bottom lip. "I'm working. The stress from the studio…and stuff." I sighed, reaching for the sunglasses in Gillian's hand. "And the headache."

Gillian shook her head, slipping the sunglasses back on my face. "You're completely buggered, Lauren. Go home, take Bo with you and make use of that giant bed of yours. Which you should have done before we did this scene, you're spun up like a top." She patted my cheek. "I'll tell Alan and Karen you wish you could come to dinner, but…"

"But what?" Bo's voice made me flinch, I turned to see her smiling next to Gillian. Appearing out of nowhere. "The dinner sounds like fun. I adore those two, and it would be good for all of us to get together. The next set of scenes are with all of us." She looked at me. "Are you coming, Lauren?"

Gillian chuckled. "Not yet."

I pinched Gillian's side as she stood next to me, making her wince and glare at me. I kept my sunglasses on, smiling at Bo. "I can't. I have a handful of meetings tonight with the studio. We're all about to hit a press junket next weekend in London and I need to arrange the schedule around the shooting schedule." I paused, my eyes drifting down her neck to the top of her collarbone where the bathrobe didn't cover her. I had already memorized that a few inches under that fluffy material, was more skin. Beautiful, perfect skin that I wanted to touch, kiss, and make mine. I felt my face flush with heat. "It's um, going to be a long night." I took a step back from Bo, god she was a like a god damn magnet, drawing me in closer. "Tell everyone I said hello and I'll see them at the morning meeting on Saturday."

I waved between the three of us. "Go, enjoy the rest of the day." I went to turn when I heard Bo.

"Lauren, are you okay? Do you need something to eat? A banana?"

I looked at the brunette, smiling. Her eyes were full of that same passion that had her attacking me on the office. "I would love a banana, but not right now." I motioned to the crew still hanging around, cleaning up. Gillian and Effy standing together and going over notes. "Later?"

Bo's smile faded a bit. "Of course." She tipped her head down, fiddling with the tie on her robe as she walked over to Gillian and Effy.

I turned my back on them, trying to calm my nerves. This feeling I had was crippling, and I had to get away from it. I had to reign back in my libido and settle down. The tabloid being a gentle reminder that all was not safe on set, regardless of how much I loved Bo. Our relationship had to remain in secret until the detective squad sealed the leak.

I sucked in a breath and walked off set, welcoming the burst of cold air slapping me in the face the moment I opened the door to go outside.

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XXXX

"Roger, I understand the studio is excited, but I don't have anything to give to the press yet. Barton is working throughout the night on posters, press kit designs, and I've yet to get the cast to do the promotional stills." I sat in my leather chair, cradling my head against the headrest. I was tired from being on the phone for the entire evening, talking with executives, studio heads, and pr teams. Roger, my executive producer in California was the only one I could stand to talk to in length. He was somewhat normal, honest, and listened to me when I said no. Taking my no's back to the studio and standing by them.

"That's fine, Lauren. We can do stills from some of the footage you've sent us. Barton is excellent and will have a poster for you by the end of the week." Roger's tinny voice irritated me. "The studio is excited. I'm excited from the things I've seen, we all want to make this movie a huge success. Even the academy is sniffing around this for next year's award season. This could be number four for you, Lauren. Imagine what that would open up for you?"

I groaned, staring at the phone. "A six month vacation would be nice." I spun the chair around, leaning on the edge of the desk. "Is the studio upset about the tabloids?"

Roger laughed. "Not at all. They love the press. It is a love story, Lauren, anything in the regards is a good thing. They like Bo Dennis and Wynn Edgar as a couple, they might play it up during the official press tour. Unless she's more Gillian's type, then…"

"Then no, Roger. You know I won't ask any of my actors to play it up off set." I clenched my jaw, hating that anyone was pursuing an idea of a coupling for Bo. "If it's a natural relationship, cultivated on set, fine. But we're not going the Kardashian route. Fake is fake, no matter how you play it." I rubbed my forehead, grabbing my phone to see only a few texts from Bo, a few from Gillian and a million from Effy.

I scrolled through Effy's as Roger moved onto the remaining schedule. Effy's texts were about Saturdays schedule, and other daily things. I deleted them, telling her to enjoy the next day off like the rest of the cast. I then went through Gillian's. She sent pictures of the cast at dinner, Bo sitting next to her looking a little downtrodden, but happy. Overall the cast was enjoying each other, even if Wynn was a heartbroken fool. But in the picture he was sitting next to Bo's costar Elizabeth, looking very cozy. I sighed, deleting those texts. Maybe Wynn and Elizabeth could take up the tabloid headlines in the next coming weeks.

I half listened to Roger, reading Bo's texts.

 _-Are you sure you're okay? You looked pale on set.-_

 _-I miss you, I wish you were here at this dinner.-_

 _-There's a Bea Arthur impersonator at this place! Gillian got him to sing at the table.-_

 _-Please don't work too hard. I know how tired you get when you over work. You fall asleep with your glasses on and squish that poor pillow man, or me.-_

I smiled when the last text was nothing but a bunch of banana symbols. I sent a few back, setting the phone down as Roger called out my name. "Yes, I'm listening. I'll check my email in a few minutes." I glanced at the time. "Look Roger, it's almost two in the morning here, I need to get some sleep. I will email you back when I'm up and send you whatever Barton and I come up with." I yawned, feeling the day's weight settle down on my shoulders. "I'll also have the new script for you by the end of the month. It's a science fiction, supernatural one. Have the studio look at it, they don't have to option me as director. Like I said, a large vacation is in my immediate future as soon as this one is done."

Roger said his goodbyes, and I clicked the speakerphone off, lying my head down on the desk. I was seriously contemplating taking a quick nap on the desk, I was that tired. I closed my eyes, taking deep breaths in when I heard the doorbell ring.

I lifted my head up, frowning. I debated leaving whoever it was to piss off, when the doorbell rang again. I groaned, shoving myself up and to my feet. "Effy, I swear to god this better be for a good reason."

I walked down the hall, towards the front door, idly noticing that it had started raining at some point. I ran my hand over messy hair, at least it wasn't snow. Yet.

The doorbell ran a third time, making me wonder why the hell Effy just didn't use the key I gave her. I yanked the front door open. "Effy, you have a key. It's never stopped you from intruding into my home before."

"She has a key? Hmm, maybe I should've asked her for it when she dropped me off." Bo smiled, standing huddled up as the rain pounded down on her.

"Bo! Hurry, get inside." I grabbed her hand, pulling her out of the rain, shutting the door behind her. I rushed past her, towards the kitchen. "You're soaked, let me get you a towel."

I ran to the small linen closet next to the pantry, grabbing thick towels. "I'm sorry it took me so long to answer the door, I thought you were Effy." I turned to find Bo standing in front of me. Even soaked to the bone, she looked incredible. Her hair wet and shiny. I swallowed hard, handing her a towel. That look in her eyes was back, the one that made me weak in the knees. "Here."

Bo took the towel slowly, wiping the rain from her face. "I hope I'm not interrupting anything. Effy said you were tied up in phone calls all night."

I nodded, taking a step back from Bo. "I just hung up on the last one. It's been nothing but conference calls since I left the set." I folded my arms across my chest. "How was dinner?"

Bo ran the towel over her hair, shrugging. "The food was good. The restaurant was fun, and Gillian and Effy are a blast when they're tipsy." She set the towel down on the marble countertop. "But it wasn't the same without you there." She tipped her head down, her brow furrowing. "Lauren, did something happen on set today? Something that I did? You seemed, distant."

I let out a slow breath, shaking my head as Bo looked back up. "No, nothing happened." I looked at my hand, searching out the very raw thumb as my nerves rose. "The scene went very well. You and Gillian did great." I lifted my hand up, preparing to gnaw when Bo's hand shot out, grabbing it.

"Something's wrong. You've been fidgety, distant, and giving this thumb hell." She smiled, running her fingers over mine. "What's wrong? Please, tell me."

I closed my eyes, shaking my head. "It's nothing. It's stupid." I opened them slowly, my eyes immediately drifting to Bo's mouth. "I'm a little stressed out from this week, and whatnot."

Bo stepped closer to me. "Are you sure it's not something I did? Because you wouldn't look at me, and it was the first time you turned down a banana." She glanced at my hand. "I was bummed when you bolted off set without asking me to come over tonight. I wasn't sure you wanted me to come over like we discussed until Gillian let something slip."

I froze. "And what was it Gillian let slip?" I licked my lips as Bo moved closer.

Bo held my hand in both of hers. "She let it slip that you had a mini brain shortage when you saw me naked during the second take. Is that true?" She slowly met my eyes, hers darkening with desire.

I swallowed slowly, clenching my jaw. "It is, but it's not." I paused, trying to find anything to tell Bo. "I mean, you're beautiful Bo. And, um. I." I shook my head again. "It's stupid."

Bo grinned, laying my hand over her heart. "It's not stupid, Lauren. It's cute, and makes me feel very loved by you." She took another step, removing what little room was between us. She leaned forward, brushing her lips across mine. "But the second she let it slip, I had Effy get me a cab and drop me off." She leaned closer, the tip of her nose grazing my ear. I could smell the rain on her, mixed with her perfume and it was whittling away my will to hold strong. "I told you, all you had to do was ask, Lauren." Bo leaned back, looking deep into my eyes.

It was that look that broke me, and I lunged forward, capturing her mouth with mine and kissing her as hard as I could. It had been a long week of bottling my feelings up, I was done. I wanted Bo. I reached up, tangling my hands in her wet hair, desperate to pull her closer as she kissed me back with equal force. The kiss was intense, consuming, and a sign that neither of us were going to stop like we had a hundred times before. I was done waiting, I wanted more from Bo, and wouldn't stop until I had all of her.

Bo moaned against my mouth, opening hers wider for my tongue to slip past her bottom lip. I pushed her back, hearing her body slam against the edge of the kitchen island. I smiled against Bo's mouth, moving my hands to her ass and lifting her up onto the counter as I pushed my body between her legs. I broke the kiss, licking my lips as I went for the soaked jacket she wore, yanking the wet material down her arms. Bo moved with me, helping me with the jacket, throwing it across the room the second her arms were free. I went for her shirt next, sliding the equally as wet material up her sides and over her head. I took a moment to look at Bo, her pink bra keeping me from what I needed. I smiled as she reached behind, unclasping the bra and let it slip forward and off.

Bo grinned as I took in the sight before me, reaching down to hold the sides of my face. "The way you look at me, Lauren, it's nothing like I've experienced."

I ran my hands up her cold skin, smiling as goosebumps followed my touch. I moved across her stomach, up her chest until the palms of my hands cupped her breasts. "You're nothing like I've ever experienced, Bo." I leaned forward, kissing her, whispering against her mouth. "I love you."

Bo gasped. "I love you, Lauren." She grabbed my hands, pulling them to fully cover her breasts. "Please, I can't wait any longer."

I nodded, kissing her again as I ran my thumbs over her nipples. Loving the sounds I was pulling from the woman. I bit her bottom lip, leaning back to look down at Bo. I moved my right hand from her breast, trailing it down her stomach to the top button of her jeans. I made quick work of the button and zipper, dipping my hand further, grazing Bo and feeling her arousal. "Bo." I rasped the words out, she was so ready for me.

Bo pushed her hips against my hand. "Lauren, please." I looked up, her eyes hazy with desire, her skin flushed pink. She reached down, covering my hand with hers urging me on. The second she did that, I couldn't hold back. I bent down, covering her nipple with my mouth while my fingers pushed her soaked underwear out of the way, and slid easily into her. I felt her entire body tense up at my touch. I waited until Bo whispered me to go ahead, before I slowly moved my fingers in and out of her. I ran my tongue over her nipple, moaning myself at how her body gripped onto my fingers. I knew Bo wouldn't last long, each time I moved deeper into her, her body shuddered. I used my free hand to drag her wet jeans down to her calves, allowing Bo to open her thighs wider for me.

I moved to her other breast, Bo burying her head into my shoulder, tearing the collar of my shirt so she should kiss, bite, the skin there. I kept on, increasing my pace, Bo's hips matching my rhythm as she moaned my name against my skin. I released Bo's breast from my mouth, leaning back so I could get better leverage. I leaned back, putting space between Bo and I. She leaned back on her forearms, angling her hips up to encourage me to go faster, harder. I honored her silent request, increasing the pace and pressure of my fingers, feeling her tighten up with every pass. I could've watched Bo like this for hours, but the way she was calling my name in breathless pants, I knew she needed the release. I leaned forward, grabbing the back of Bo's neck, pulling her into a hard kiss as my thumb ran circles against her aching nub. She whimpered against my mouth, biting my bottom lip, when I finally pushed my fingers and thumb up at the same time. Bo came hard against my hand, her body trembling as she called out my name in a broken voice. She fell limp in my arms as her body went through aftershocks of such an intense orgasm. I waited for a moment, before reluctantly pulling my hand from her, and wrapping both arms around her. Her skin was hot to the touch as I ran my hands up and down her bare back.

I waited for a second. "Bo, are you?" I paused. It was very cliché to ask if someone was okay after giving them a mind-blowing orgasm.

I felt a soft, warm kiss, press against the stinging bite mark on my shoulder. "Yes." Bo leaned back in my arms, swallowing hard and smiling with hazy eyes. "That was. Everything I've been dreaming about since the office." She licked her lips, running her fingers over where she had bitten me. "I'm sorry, I couldn't help it."

I reached up, brushing hair from her face. "I barely felt it." I met her eyes, feeling my own arousal edge to the point of being unbearable. Bo being naked in front of me wasn't helping me from holding back until she was ready again.

Luckily for me, Bo picked up on that. She gently pushed me back, and slid off the counter. She grasped onto me to steady rubbery legs, but soon moved her hands to the edge of my shirt. "This has to come off."

I helped her with my now ruined shirt. "We can take this to the bedroom? Or the shower. You're still wet." My voice broke at the way Bo was running her eyes over me, pulling off my bra and throwing it behind me.

She smirked. "I know I am." She knelt down, unbuttoning my jeans and tugging them down with my underwear. "But I have to do something first."

I shuddered, looking down. "Bo, I can wait."

She looked up at me. "I can't." Bo whispered a curse word when she saw how much I desired her, wanted her.

I went to say something, but all the air was sucked out of my lungs the second I felt her tongue against me. The only thing I could think of to do was tangle my hands in her hair and enjoy her lack of patience.

* * *

XXXX

"Sex in the kitchen is a first for me." I mumbled against Bo's neck. We were in my bed, cuddling after we both finally tapped out and decided on a break.

Bo laughed, running a hand through my hair. "I've never had sex in a bed this big." She kissed the top of my head. "Nor have I made love like I just did with you."

I grinned, looking up at Bo. "Me neither." I tugged Bo to lay down with me, letting her snuggle deep into my arms. I wasn't lying, somewhere in between the explosion of pent up tension, Bo and I had made love. Slow, careful, and incredible. Bo was truly unlike anyone I was with, she was insatiable and caught me off guard more than once with how easy she recovered, and how aggressive she was in her mission to bring me to my knees with pleasure. My fate was now forever sealed. I ran small circles along her bare side, loving the way she sighed contently against me. "Good thing you have tomorrow off."

I felt Bo smile against my skin. "It technically is tomorrow, but yes, I'm glad I'm off today." She ran a hand across my stomach. "I just want to spend the day with you, Lauren. I missed you this week. I missed being able to have moments like this with you."

I glanced at the small red mark above my breast. "I think you showed me a few times how much you missed me." I squeezed Bo closer, glancing at the clock across the room. It was almost five in the morning. "I'm glad I don't meet with Barton until one." I yawned, closing my eyes. "You wore me out."

Bo chuckled. "I don't feel bad at all." She took a deep breath in, yawning halfway through it. "We should both get some sleep. I'll make breakfast when we wake up." Bo mumbled the words out, something she did when she was two breaths away from falling asleep. She took one breath. "I love you, Lauren. It's beyond hopeless for me now."

I grinned. "You're just saying that."

"I mean it, I hope I never hurt you again." Bo mumbled out in a second breath, passing out in my arms.

I stared up at my ceiling, the moonlight fading into the early morning sunrise. Thinking about the night, and what Bo had just said. Hoping I wouldn't hurt her either now that we were past the point of no return. I closed my eyes, deciding that was something I could worry about after breakfast. For now, I was content, and needed my rest before the insatiable brunette woke me up for more.


	14. Chapter 14

**N: short one, a filler chapter as i work out the next oncoming drama bit. A happy little one to keep you tide over. Read, enjoy, review, then go to amazon and review my books if you've read them! If you haven't, then go ahead and get them, read them and share them!**

* * *

 **Bo**

Yawning, I rolled onto my back. My hand running over the cool mattress and finding it empty on Lauren's side. I opened my eyes, frowning to find she was missing. It had become my favorite thing lately, to wake up next to her warmth. Snuggle up into her side and fall asleep for a little longer.

I sat up, clutching the blanket to my chest and looked around the room. I sighed when I saw her glasses, her notebooks, and her favorite blanket was missing. Telling me she was in her den, working. I yawned one more time, scooting to the edge of the bed, and stretching. I grinned when I felt how sore my body was, remembering all the activity from the night before. Standing up from the bed, I walked to the closet and pulled down what looked to be an old pair of pajama pants, and a thick sweater. I then walked to the bathroom, grinning wider when I saw my coat hung up and drying over the large heat vent next to the bathtub. I shook my head, knowing the rest of my clothes were probably in the final spin cycle in the washing machine. Lauren, if anything, was considerate, and would hate for my clothes to be ruined. Let alone lie in a mess around her immaculate house.

I thought about the night before, the way Lauren took me, loved me and blew my world apart. She was incredible, perfect, stunning and i would happily through my future career away to just be with her. I was hopelessly in love with her, and it was worse than ever. I smiled, running my fingers over the red marks left by her. I had to bite the inside of my cheek to hold back the soft moan edging out of my throat when i thought about having her again. I would find it difficult to keep my hands to myself, and respect the workplace rules when we went back to work tomorrow. My heart and body craved Lauren now, she completed me, made me feel whole, and i was grateful for fate leading back to her. I was already picturing the future we could have. What would be next for us? I had already found my almost perfect, what more could there be? I shook my head, i sounded like a silly teen in love with the posters on her wall. I tried to focus on getting dressed, but failed when I ran my hands over her clothes.

Swathed in warm clothing, that smelled like Lauren, I set out to find her. It was only a little past ten in the morning, leaving us plenty of the day left to spend together. I smiled, burying my hands in the long sleeves of the sweater. I was ecstatic in that Christmas morning kind of way. Last night had concreted much of my heart, and how it beat for the blonde. It had been an incredibly long journey to get this point. A journey filled with bumps, potholes, and many wrong turns. But I was here now. Here where I belonged and I was excited for the future.

I came to the den, poking my head around the door frame. Lauren was sitting in a large leather chair, covered up to her chin with her blanket. Her eyes were closed as a man's voice spoke over the speaker phone on the desk in front of her. She looked gorgeous with messy, wild hair, wearing her glasses as frowned at the voice. "I know Roger. I know I'm under budget, get them to give me more money for the digital department. It's far cheaper than actually getting Spitfires to fly over set. Cheaper by a few hundred thousand." Lauren groaned, shifting under blanket as she opened her eyes. Her brown eyes immediately finding mine, a smile edging the frown away.

"I'll see what I can do, Lauren. I'll have accounting break down the budget for the big wigs. I know you saved a ton when you cast Bo and that other unknown." Roger chuckled. "I still don't know how you negotiated Gillian down to a reasonable fee. She's been fielding ten million dollar offers, and you got her down to five."

Lauren gave me a look, pointing at the phone and mouthing that she was annoyed. "Roger, I have my secrets. And you'll be blown away by the unknowns. I know I already have been." Lauren winked at me, snaking a hand out to reach for the phone. "I'm taking the rest of the day off, Roger. I'll still email you what Barton sends me, but I'm done with phone calls for today. We can get back at it Sunday night." Lauren waited until Roger agreed, and hung up on him. She let out a groan, flopping back into the chair with a soft smile. "Good morning."

I smiled, blushing as I shuffled over to the chair. "Good morning." When I was close, I bent down, kissing Lauren soundly. Smiling against her mouth as she pushed back. When I parted, I licked my lips and sat on the edge of the desk. "I woke up to a very chilly bed."

Lauren nodded. "Blame Roger. He called with more studio bullshit. They're really pushing the press junket next week." She flipped open the blanket, revealing she was only wearing a long t-shirt, and waved me to sit on her lap. "As you can see, I had intentions of coming back to bed."

I chuckled, squishing myself into the large chair as Lauren covered us with the blanket. I sighed happily at the way her body against mine had an adverse reaction. "Do you ever take a vacation?" I snuggled into her arms. "Or a full day off?"

Lauren wrapped her arms around me. "Not until production has wrapped." She held me tight. "I never really had a reason to want to take days off while working. Work was my only constant, the only thing I deeply loved." She slipped a hand under the large sweater, her palm warm against my skin. "Then I cast this unknown who keeps surprising me day after day."

I laughed. "I don't know if I should be insulted or relieved the entertainment world sees me as an unknown these days." I looked up at Lauren. "We should take a long vacation when this film is done. I want you to myself, Lauren. I want to solidify that our relationship is real outside of this hectic pace."

"Real and not a secret?" Lauren's face turned. "I'm sorry about that Bo, it's just." She let out a breath. "If the press found out about us, they wouldn't let it go. I'm afraid to let that third party in before I'm ready." She kissed my forehead. "Plus, you make me feel normal. Normal and a nobody."

I gave her a dirty, playful look. "You'll never be a nobody. You're my somebody. Never forget that."

Lauren cocked an eyebrow, a small smile forming on her lips. "Are you staking your claim on me? Should I get your name tattoo in a heart on my ass?"

I shook my head, leaning to sit up on her lap as I went to stand up. I held my hand out to her. "I would never ask you to defile such a perfect ass." I waggled my fingers at her. "Get up. We need breakfast, a shower. Effy told me about a place an hour away from here, where no one knows, or cares, who we are. Nothing but a small town with shops and cafes."

Lauren raised her eyebrows. "Are you asking me on a date?"

I shrugged nervously. "Yes?" I went to drop my hand. "As much as I would love to spend all day in bed with you, I want to spend time with you. Outside of hidden walls, secrets, and sets." I took a chance on asking Effy last night if there was anywhere Lauren and I could go, where we could be normal. She suggested the quiet town where celebrity was nothing more than a word. I stepped back. "Never mind. We can do a day in again, watching reruns and eating my terrible cooking."

Lauren chewed on her bottom lip, standing up from the chair. "Effy suggested the town?"

I nodded, picking at the sleeve of my sweater. "Yes. Drunkenly said she had it vetted and checked out. The only movie star they recognized was Jennifer Lawrence and Mel Gibson. I have this odd image of her going door to door with our pictures, asking if anyone had seen us."

Lauren laughed, reaching for my hand. "That's probably exactly what she did." When she had my hand in hers, she pulled me into her arms. "Let's go. We both could use a day outside of this house."

"Are you sure? The tabloids could spot us." I glanced up at her.

Lauren sighed. "We'll be careful. It also looks like the tabloids are too focused on set exclusives. I'm also certain Effy has a press release ready, stating we are having secret meetings about casting you as the lead in my next film." Lauren squeezed me before letting me go, keeping my hand in hers. "After last night, I want to try harder with us. I want to fight the stupid fears I have. What's the worst that could happen?"

I smiled, shrugging. The tone in Lauren's voice told me that she was deathly afraid of the tabloids shredding our relationship apart. Making me wonder what kind of hell she had been through over the years. "Let's take baby steps?"

Lauren smirked. "Baby steps." She tugged my hand, silently asking me to follow her. "So, you mentioned a shower?"

I grinned, feeling my body heat rise to the point a sweater was unnecessary. I turned, dropping her hand as I lifted the sweater off, letting it fall to the floor. I looked over my shoulder. "I did. Race you there?" I skipped a few steps, trying to bait Lauren.

In a blink, I was scooped up into her arms and carried with urgency to the bathroom. A very eager blonde staring at my chest, mumbling how I needed to learn how to play fair.

* * *

XXXX

Lauren

"I guess this is the place?" I leaned forward, looking out the windshield of the old Aston Martin, locking the emergency brake. I glanced at Bo, grinning and holding my hand. She looked adorable in the large English driving cap I found in the back of my closet. She was wearing a pair of my old jeans, a new tweed button down I never wore, and a waxed raincoat. She looked like a part of the scenery. She wore no makeup and kept her hair in a ponytail under the hat. I had done the same with my appearance, hiding my hair under an old hat Gillian gave me from a trip to Australia. I dressed in layers, wearing my oldest, most comfy, clothes. For a moment, I felt like a normal silly couple doing the touristy thing. Taking the sights of an old English town.

Bo's grin had my heart skipping. "It's amazing." She bent over, kissing my cheek as she pushed out of the old car. She stood up, taking a deep breath of the very cold, but fresh air. "I feel like I'm in a movie."

I chuckled walking around to her side of the car. "You technically are in a movie." I leaned into her side, throwing an arm around her side. "I'm just glad we actually made it out of the house." I smirked at the blush around her cheeks.

Bo leaned into my embrace. "I couldn't help it. That shower had me reminiscent, and when I reminisce about you naked, I want to touch you as much as possible." She sighed, kissing the side of my neck. "I mean have you seen you naked?"

I winked at her. "I am pretty spectacular." I kissed her softly. "But nothing compared to you." I stepped back, grabbing her elbow to guide her towards the row of tiny shops. "Let's go do something before we get too handsy. We have plenty of time when the sun goes down to compare who looks better naked."

Bo groaned, but followed me. We were careful not to hold hands. Years of the entertainment industry drilling that into our heads. Never overtly show affection when you didn't want the world to know. I didn't want to tell Bo, especially after seeing how excited she was to take me out, but I was beyond nervous about anyone seeing us together. I knew how the tabloids worked, and no press release would keep the hounds off the fresh meat of an on set romance like Bo and I were living. But, Bo was worth the risk. I wanted to spend time with her as much as she did me. I wasn't lying when I said she made me feel normal. She did. I saw it in her eyes, when she looked at me, that she saw pat my fame. The money, the power, and the waves of adoration that followed the famous director. When she looked at me, I became Lauren Lewis. Former pizza delivery girl with big dreams to change the world in the only way I could.

I smiled softly, watching Bo rambling about how the little town reminded her of those wizard books she read while waiting at auditions. "I wonder if any of these shops sell wands."

I laughed, gently pulling her towards an old store that caught my eye. An antique bookshop slash trinket vendor. "Let's go in here. I want to see if they have first editions. My mother collects them, and harasses me whenever I travel to find her a new one to add to her shelves." I held the old wooden door open for her. "Maybe you can find a souvenir or two to take home." I pointed at a large pewter mug in the shape of a dragon. "Grab that. Gillian will love it. She has a strange obsession with dragons."

Bo chuckled, picking up the large mug. "It's more of an obsession for the girl who plays the dragon queen in her favorite show. It's more of a fetish, than an obsession."

I gave Bo a strange look. "That explains a lot. When did you find this out about Gilly?"

"In between blocking our love scenes. It gets awkward, so Gillian rambles. I think it's her way of making me feel comfortable." Bo moved to a case of full of snow globes. "I also learned Effy loves snow globes. We should pick one out for her, thank her for being our secret matchmaker and detective." Bo leaned forward against the case. Asking the older woman behind the counter to see one with a large display with Buckingham palace in the middle.

I patted Bo's back. "I'll be over there, browsing."

Bo smiled, nodding as she shook the globe, making the white plastic flakes flitter about.

I walked over to a small case filled with old and new necklaces, all with varying Celtic knots, and other very old lockets. I smiled, loving the history trapped in the tiny case. I scanned over traditional Thor's hammers, trees of life sigils, and then I came across an old cameo locket. It was made of very old silver, a white ivory profile of a woman cradled by a sapphire blue background. It was incredible, and reminded me of Bo. I turned, motioning the older woman over. She smiled, telling Bo she'd be back in a tick.

"Yes ma'am?"

I grinned at her thick accent, and pointed at the necklace. "Can I see that one, please?"

She smiled. "Yes. This piece is very old. Fell into this store from an estate sale. Rumor is the woman who owned this was giving this by her first true love as he shipped off to fight the Germans." She handed over the locket. The moment it was in my hands, I felt the love, the pull and it made me think of Bo and what she made me feel.

I held it in the palm of my hand, running my fingertip over the delicate cameo. "It's beautiful."

"It is. The locket has a happy ending, from what I understand. Love won, and it came here to find a new home. A new love story to be a part of." She leaned forward, looking over at Bo holding up different snow globes.

I smirked at the old woman. I knew she had picked up on the energy between Bo and I the second we walked in. "I'll take it. Can you wrap it up discreetly while I help my friend choose a snow globe?"

The older woman, winked at me and took the necklace back. Ushering off to the corner of the counter to package it up. I moved back to Bo, leaning over her shoulder. "Are you going to get them all?"

Bo grinned, shaking her head and holding up two globes. One had the Queen sitting in her throne, the other was the Queen standing on a mountain top. "I might get these two. Effy has a unique love for the Queen. She'll love it." I spotted another pewter mug tucked under Bo's arm. A mug that looked an awful lot like my Scottish man pillow.

I laughed, nodding. "She will love you forever." I glanced at the older woman, setting the small brown paper wrapped package on the counter. "We should hurry, I'm starving and I won't last much longer if we don't eat something."

Bo smiled, collecting her gifts and walked over to the counter. I stood next to her, handing over a few pounds with Bo's money, to the older lady as she wrapped the mug and snow globes up. I palmed the small box while was Bo distracted, talking with the older woman about the town and where we could get a decent lunch.

I made eye contact with the older woman, who's smile brightened, thanking her as Bo took the bag from her. "Thank you."

I gently took Bo's elbow and held the door open for her. I guided her down the street to the small pub the older woman suggested. But before we went in, spontaneity struck me and I side stepped down an alley next to the pub. It wasn't much of an alley, but a lush green pathway. There was ivy growing along the stone walls of the buildings on either side of us. Creating a perfect place for me to give Bo the necklace. "Bo, hang on a moment."

Bo looked at me, nervous. "What is it? Did that lady recognize you?" She looked around, looking panicked. "I didn't say anything. Even when she asked my name, I told her my name was Mary."

I laughed, grabbing Bo's hand, pulling her closer. "It's fine. Nothing is wrong, she didn't recognize either of us." I dug in my pocket, pulling out the small package. "I'm terrible with surprises." I held it out to her. "I got you this."

Bo raised her eyebrows, staring at the package. "Is it a tiny snow globe?"

I shook my head, pushing it for her to take. "Open it before I ruin it and tell you what it is."

Bo still looked at me cautiously, handing over the bag of gifts for me to hold. "Okay." She carefully peeled apart the package, revealing the vintage black necklace box. She lifted the lid, gasping as she ran her fingers over the cameo. "Lauren, it's incredible."

I smiled, tipping my head down to look at my feet. "It made me think of you. Our love story, the real one and the one that inspires me to love you as hard as I possibly can." I looked up, leaning over to pick it out of the box. "It's over seventy years old, survived the war and came home. Now." I lifted it out of the box, motioning for Bo to turn around so I could put it on her. "It's coming to us, a symbol of what I feel for you. What I will fight for, and how much I absolutely adore you, Bo."

I heard Bo sniffle as I secured the necklace, turning her back around. I smiled, wiping away the tears from her cheeks. "Do you like it? You're crying."

Bo grabbed the sides of my face, kissing me deeply. I didn't care, the ivy was doing its job in hiding us from the street. When she parted, she licked her lips, grinning. "I love it. I love it. It's amazing." She sniffled, running her thumb across my cheek. "And all I got you was a pewter mug shaped like your scottish boyfriend."

I laughed, giving her a look. "I wondered who that was for." I kissed the tip of her nose. "I'll love it, it'll remind me of you."

Bo slipped her arm around my waist, her hand moving to the locket sitting in the middle of her chest. "And this will always make me think of you." She sighed happily. "What did I do right in this world to have you?"

I smiled, even though Bo's tone had me a wondering why she sounded so sad. I covered the hand on her chest with mine, pressing both against her pounding heart. "Now that I've made you cry, can I interest you in a pint and some fine English fare?"

Bo's grin returned, lighting up her entire face. "Yes." She wiped at her cheeks, kissing me one more time before she linked her arm in mine and walked us out of the ivy alley. "Will you at least pretend to cry with joy when I give you the mug later?"

I laughed, leaning into her side. "Anything for you, my love."

Bo and I walked to the pub, arm in arm. She was giddy, her hand never leaving the locket around her neck. I smiled, silently telling my grandparents thank you for guiding me towards this incredible woman, and love.

I was felt normal for the first time in years, normal in being in love, true love, for the first time in my entire life.

I could feel my guard slowly melting away, the walls I built up, and the fear I carried, fading into a distant memory. I was pretty sure nothing would stand in my way now.


	15. Chapter 15

**N: next chapter will be from Bo's pov, explaining her side and I assure you, nothing is as it seems or as Lauren sees it. So don't fret, nothing is as it is, and i went this route because after listing every possible way to go, this one seemed the best to make Lauren lose her cool and make for a better ending in the end. Dont worry, there is an happy ending to come, so don't worry! And there's a twist to come, as the leak is revealed and their involvement in everything falling apart. So read on and enjoy me fighting through my writers block...and making this mess.**

* * *

"I hate the press." I grumbled, leaning against the window of the car. It had started snowing in London, casting white all over the city. I was tired, and ready to go home after eighteen hours of interviews. The interviews had done their job. The next few weeks would have the world buzzing about the film. Bo was a darling of the media, winning every reporter over with her kindness and charm. There were a few studio executives that showed up, wanting to meet the woman. At the end of the lengthy day, Bo had three scripts in her hands. All given to her with the hopes she would take the lead role.

"The press loves you." Gillian joked from the front seat, digging through a gift basket given to us by one the hotel. "The love your face, your witty comments, and sass."

I groaned, rubbing my forehead. "They're all fake." I glanced at Bo sitting next to me, reading over an email Effy handed to her the second she pulled the car up. I reached over, running a hand down her shoulder. "Are you okay?"

Bo smiled, still reading as she found my hand, pulling it to rest in hers. "Yes. It's just a ton of offers from a few different studios. They all want me to audition for them." She looked at me. "They love my performance in the little clip reel the studio sent over. It's weird."

I smiled, leaning over to kiss her cheek. "It's not weird, it's amazing. I told you, Bo, this film would start your professional life all over." I sighed, looking down at the necklace Bo wore. "You did really well today, even when a few pressed the tabloid headlines." I was proud of Bo, but nervous. Nervous what was to come for us when the film was released to the rest of the world. Would she stay the Bo I knew, or change? I shook my head, focusing on the now for now. The future was something to care about later.

Bo's smile faded. "Maybe. I didn't like some of the questions, even if it was about the fake relationship Gillian and Effy crafted."

"You both did a good job of not giving each other the google eyes. Perhaps it was because I stuck myself in between you two." Gillian turned in the front seat, handing me a small bag of fancy almonds. "I'm impressed you both didn't explode from ignoring each other."

Effy chuckled in the driver's seat. "Lauren's hate for press junkets runs deep. She ignored the entire room, let alone her lovely."

I frowned, leaning back in my seat. "Press junkets are nothing more than vapid, pointless wastes of time." I sighed. "I did almost punch the one interviewer who kept bother Bo about her ex boyfriend back in California."

I felt Bo's hand tighten around mine. "I wouldn't have stopped you. I need to get an agent, and a lawyer to help fortify this second round of celebrity." She grabbed the bag of almonds off my lap. "I had a sinking feeling Devin would come out of the woodwork to make some money off of me. It was what he did when I was on TV, and it wouldn't stop him now."

Gillian leaned over the seat, her mouth agape and her eyes wide. "Devin? Who's this Devin fellow?"

I clenched my jaw while Bo went on to tell Gillian about her ex. The one Bo had told me about that first day she was at my house, then again today during lunch when that one reporter brought up Devin. Asking Bo very awkward questions about her past with him, and showing her headlines from the states. Devin was definitely riding on Bo's rising star, and deep down, it was bothering me. Bothering me in a way that I couldn't place my finger on just yet, just that I already hated the man.

"Hmmm. Should we have detective Effy pay this dusty scroat a visit." Gillian squinted in deep thought as she returned to her seat. Effy slapping her arm to get her to sit properly.

"I don't have a badge anymore, nor do I have jurisdiction to fly across the ocean and slap a man child in the crown jewels for being a jerk." Effy rolled her eyes, focusing on taking the last few turns back to my house.

"Can you investigate why you love the queen so much?" I caught Effy's eyes in the rear view mirror, smirking as Effy blushed. "You managed to interject a royal reference at least a handful times a day."

Effy cleared her throat. "We're not focused on me, we're focused on you and solving the mystery of the set leak." She scrunched her face up, an idea suddenly popping into her head. "Perhaps, just perhaps, I can put the squeeze on Devin. There's something about his dialogue in the article shoved in Bo's face, that has me putting pieces together. He repeated a similar phrase the leak did in last weeks headlines."

Gillian chuckled. "Squeeze? Is that a formal legal term?" She started mocking Effy's voice.

Bo laughed at the two women now playfully bickering. I smiled softly. When Bo laughed, it made all the world's stress disappear. She glanced at me, blushing when she saw I was mildly staring at her. She tipped her head down, whispering. "What are you looking at?"

I leaned over, brushing my lips over her ear. "You. Always you."

Bo sighed, closing her eyes. "Lauren."

I leaned back, intent on kissing Bo like I had craved all day, when I heard.

"Oy! Not in the car! Not in front of the children!" Gillian half hollered at us, pushing Bo and I apart. She pointed a finger at us. "Effy told me all about the horrors she's witnessed. I cannot be scarred, it would make me frown, and I can't afford frown lines." She ran her finger along her flawless skin. "See, perfection."

I shook my head, trying not to smile. "Gillian, enough." I looked at her. "Or I'll start rumors you and Effy are having a set romance. That should be enough to make the entire world forget Bo and I."

Gillian's face turned a slight shade of pale, as she laughed nervously. "Ha. Funny, Lauren. No one would ever believe such an egregious lie." She tilted her head down, focusing on the large bag of fancy meat and cheeses in the bag. "Filthy lies."

I grinned, winking at Bo as she stared at me confused. I had picked up a few days ago that Gillian and Effy's detective team had taken a turn for something a little more personal. There was a tiny romance brewing between the two women, and I was enjoying the view as it blossomed day after day. Both of them desperate to keep it under wraps by diverting all attention towards Bo and I, and the set mole.

"And here we are! Home!" Effy's voice cracked as she pulled the car into my garage.

I laughed, pushing open my door and collecting my bags. I was eager to take a hot shower and change out of the Armani pantsuit I wore to the junket. I also knew Bo was eager to get out of the fancy outfit Effy had brought her. I glanced back at Bo, loving the way her tailored dress pants fit. Giving me a few inappropriate thoughts throughout the day. Thoughts that helped take the edge off of wanting to throttle every other reporter.

As I waited for Bo, I leaned into the driver's window. "Effy, be careful with Gilly. She'll ruin you in all the best ways." I waited until Effy stumbled over a few words, before patting her shoulder. "I'll see you tomorrow afternoon. I'll drive Bo to the set tomorrow. We have that talk show phone interview in the morning, no one will suspect."

Effy cleared her voice. "Yes, yes. Okay. Sure. Sounds like a plan." She nodded towards Bo hugging Gillian goodbye. "Have a good evening, Lauren. I'll see you on set."

I laughed, shaking my head as I walked over to Bo, taking her hand. Gillian looked at me, I smirked looking back over at Effy. The normally confident red head blushed fiercely and scampered off to the car. She waved awkwardly as Effy backed the car out of the garage and sped away.

I brought Bo's hand up, kissing her knuckles. "I'm very ready for pajamas and a quiet night. The next few days are going to be brutal. We have the major battle scenes to finish, then it's all downhill from here. We're three weeks away from wrapping. Then it's off to the editing studio." I yawned, holding the door into the kitchen open for Bo to walk in.

Bo grinned, adding an extra sway to her hips, knowing I was staring. "I can't believe it's almost been four months since I started this project." She dropped her bag full of scripts to the floor, turning around to look in my eyes. "It's all felt like a dream. A dream I hate to wake up from." She waved at the bag. "I'll need your help picking a script. The one I really like, would have me off to the south of France a week after I finish this film." She ran a hand over the cameo around her neck. The pale grey silk shirt she wore brought out the bright blue of the old piece. "What will happen to us?"

I stepped towards her, dropping my things on the chair next to the large dining table I never used. "What do you mean?"

Bo sighed, leaning against the countertop. "I mean, what will happen? If I go to France, or Vancouver, or back to California for any of these offers, you'll be here. In London, editing." She looked at me with sad eyes. "Can we survive?"

I frowned, resting my hands on her arms. "Where is this coming from?"

Bo shrugged, placing her hands on my hips. "I don't know. I guess it's from the press asking about my love life, my ex, what my future holds, the stupid bs with Wynn and Gillian, that it has me worried. I know how the entertainment business works. It pushes people together then pushes them apart just as fast." She moved closer, so close I could feel her heart pound. "I just found you again, I don't want to lose you, Lauren. You're the best thing to happen to me, and if you asked me, I will say no to every offer to stay at your side."

I sighed, leaning forward to kiss Bo gently. "I would never ask such a thing of you. I would never tell you to give up work out of my selfish need to have you everyday, to wake up to in the morning. You deserve this second chance, with me and your career." I brushed her hair away from her face. "To be honest, I'm a miserable hobbit during the editing process. It's best you stay far, far, far away from me until it's done." I smiled, resting my hand against her cheek. "We will be fine. Maybe after this film is done, edited and ready for the world, we can be open about our relationship. Beat the press at their own game."

Bo raised her eyebrows. "Are you serious? You'd tell the world about us? Stop hiding and running around like secret agents?" She grinned as I nodded yes. "Well, it might ruin our sex life. I think being secretive and hiding adds a little bit of zest to the bedroom." She squeezed my hips, kissing me soundly.

I swallowed hard as she parted from me. Hiding from the cast did have a certain effect on our after hours life. We could barely keep our hands to ourselves the second we were alone. Whether it was late night visits to her apartment, or Bo hiding in the backseat of Effy's car as my assistant delivered the next days schedule, we were living a very secret life. "I would, Bo. I love you and I hate hiding the way I feel about you." I kissed her again, letting it linger, my intentions clear as I went for the buttons on her shirt. I leaned back, continuing to unbutton Bo's shirt. "But we should make good use of the time we have left in the shadows."

Bo smirked, reaching for my pants, unbuttoning it and sliding her hand past the waistband. "I agree." She kissed me as her fingers moved past my underwear, taking my breath away.

God did I love this woman.

* * *

XXXXXX

Three weeks later

"God dammit! Can't this god damn rain give me a break!" I huddled under an umbrella with Effy. "I'm four hours away from being done with this film!" And four hours away from leaving with Bo on a short vacation to Italy. We were going to spend a few weeks together before she headed off to work on her next film in Vancouver. I was excited for the future, and eager to start a new life with Bo. We had grown closer over the last few weeks, the end of the film in our sights. We were so close to the end, we stopped being so cautious about being together. Bo had been spending every night at my house, and I had grown addicted to waking up to her in the morning. I even had idle thoughts of what it would like to marry her in a year. Live out another dream I had tucked away in my heart.

"Maybe it's Scotland's way of saying, please don't go! Please don't leave our mud bogs, torrential downpours, and sheep shit." Effy hollered over the pounding rain smashing into the umbrella.

I rolled my eyes, pulling my raincoat tighter against my body. "Shush." I glanced at her. "Why aren't you hiding in Gillian's trailer, having a hot cup of redhead?"

Effy scowled at me, shifting the umbrella just enough to let the cold rain smack into the top of my head. "You're an evil vile one. Gillian is off in makeup, getting the blood reapplied on her costume and face." She moved the umbrella back. "Where's your hot cup of brunette? Tabloids have her and Gillian on the verge of marriage."

I grumbled. "Don't remind me." I looked over my shoulder, catching the camera crew coming back over with the rain gear. I had opted to push through the rain and finish the last few battle scenes. "Bo and I had a bit of an argument last night over the phone. Her stupid ex popping out to comment on the new rumors. I guess he's trying real hard to cash in on her fame." I sighed, turning back to the muddy battlefield in front of me.

Effy leaned into my side. "Why argue over nothing? You know Bo loves you to Pluto and back. I don't know why you haven't just come out and tell the world about you two. It would make life so much bearable for the rest of us." She looked up. "And take the heat off of me and Gillian."

I smile softly, nudging her. "It's payback." I took in a cold breath of air. "I want to wait until we're done. I don't want this film, or Bo and I, to be tainted by all that comes with living in front of the camera." I checked my watch. "Let's get this done. I want to send the crew home early. "

Effy nodded, turned and grabbed my elbow. "Gillian is steam rolling towards us, and she doesn't have her happy face on. Which is unusual after we have private meetings in her trailer, I always leave her with a happy face."

I gave Effy a dirty look. "I hate that I know exactly what you mean." I shivered and turned. Gillian was definitely on the warpath, jogging through the pouring rain with a magazine clutched in her hand.

She held it up, stopping just under the umbrella. "Promise me you won't lose your mind and break something?"

"What is it?" I felt my stomach twist.

Gillian glanced at Effy then back to me. "Promise me. This isn't her fault." She looked back at Effy. "I'll need you to investigate this immediately." Gillian handed the wet magazine over.

I leaned over Effy, reading the cover as being one of the more legitimate entertainment magazines in England. I caught the random headlines, when I saw a picture of Devin, grinning like the vapid idiot he was. I went to step away. "That man is an idiot, recycling the same sad bits of pieces of his fame from seven years ago."

"Oh. Shit." Effy's voice had me turning to look at her. Her lips were pursed tightly together as she reached for her phone. Typing away with rapid fingers. She tried to hide the magazine until I snatched it from her hands.

The headline had my heart tumbling to the bottom of my stomach, pieces of it breaking off as I read each bold print word.

DEVIN CHABON EXCLUSIVE! I'M NOT MAD MY WIFE IS A CHEATER. AN INTERVIEW WITH BO DENNIS' HUSBAND AND HIS THOUGHTS ABOUT HER ONSET ROMANCE WITH GILLIAN HARRIS.

I clenched my fists around the wet paper, reading Devin tell all about his life with Bo Dennis and how their marriage was an open one for the last few years, but now that she was back in the spotlight, they were working on a reconciliation. I read quickly, swallowing down the bile rising in my throat, finally shoving the magazine back into Gillian's hands. "It's bullshit. She's not married, it's him creating a spotlight for himself. Bo isn't married."

I turned to ignore Effy on the phone, probably to her police connections to find out the truth, when I saw Bo standing a few feet away. Her face streaked with tears, standing under an umbrella. She met my eyes, and in that look, I knew.

She came closer to me, I held my hand up stopping her. "Is it true?"

Bo sniffled, swallowing hard. "I can explain. I filed for divorce three months after." She sniffled. "I was young, stupid, and had too much money. I thought he was incredible. We secretly married in an Elvis church." Bo's voice trembled as she stumbled over her words. "I finally had the money from this film to pay the court to go ahead and push it through…"

"You're married." I felt my anger spike with my heartbreak as I cut Bo off. "You're married and didn't tell me?" I turned around, looking up at Effy and Gillian staring at me like I was about to explode. I shook my head as the tears welled up, flinching when I felt Bo's hand on my shoulder. I didn't turn to look at her. "Don't. Please, don't."

I walked away, grabbing Effy as I fought hard not to break down. My fears about this relationship and mixing it with business, would blow up. "Effy."

"Lauren, I have people looking into it. Looking into records and this Devin bastard." She covered my hand with hers.

"I'm leaving. Have Roberto from the second unit finish this for me. He knows what needs to be done, he did all the other battle scenes." I cleared my throat, walking quicker, avoiding the looks of the rest of the cast. "Tell everyone I had a family emergency back in Boston, had to leave immediately."

Effy squeezed my hand. "Lauren, don't leave like this. Wait until we solve the mess. Gillian and I figured out who the leak might be, that they've been in contact with Devin to ruin Bo." Effy tried to stop me, but I pushed further. I wanted to get off this set, run to my car and drive as far away as I could. My heart was two breaths away from shattering apart. Bo had hurt me deeper than before, pursuing something with me while she was married, made me feel dirty. Dirty, used and betrayed. I was just another step in the ladder she was climbing back to the top. I was a sucker.

I reached my car, yanking the door open. The tears had forced their way out, rushing down my face as I looked at Effy. "I'll call you in a few days, let you know where to send the footage for editing." I looked over her shoulder, Bo was wrapped in Gillian's arms. "I can't do this right now. I should've known better than to fall…"

"Fall in love? No one should ever regret that, Lauren." Effy stepped in front of me, glaring at me with her piercing eyes. "Now, listen to me. I'm going to get this sorted out, one way or another. But you." She poked me in the arm hard. "Never regret what happened between you and Bo. Because as much as you're denying it, it's real."

I shook my head, sliding into the driver's seat. "I need to go. This hurts too much." I let out a soft sob. "Why didn't she tell me?"

"Because she was afraid you'd do this exact thing you are now." Effy glared at me, the rain soaking her to the bone. "Don't run away, Lauren."

I looked into her eyes. "I won't, I just need to get away from the set for a few." I smiled, closed the door and drove off. I felt the pain resonate through my entire body, a similar pain I had felt that day seven years ago. A pain I'd been afraid would show back up one day, no matter how much I believed Bo and her feelings for me. It hurt, she hurt me and I felt stupid.

I grabbed my phone, deleting the messages from Gillian and booked an immediate flight to the South of France where I kept a rental house. I then emailed Roger and told him I would be doing all editing there and would not be available for any press releases, or junkets until the film premier in three months.

After I hung up with Roger, I drove to the private airport I often used for quick flights home after extremely late nights on set, crying uncontrollably the entire way. I had to get away, get out of this country and away from the feelings that were born here. I couldn't breathe and not think of Bo.

I had to go somewhere where nothing reminded me of her, and think. Think and find a way to chase away the pain wrapped around my heart.

I had lied to Effy. I was running away, running away from a past that was colliding with my present. Pointing and telling me "I told you so." I shook my head, chasing out that voice and the others lingering in my head. Telling me to go back, listen. But I didn't. I drove on to the airport, climbed aboard the private plane and within an hour, I was in the air. Heading towards the south of France, leaving a broken heart in the muddy bogs of Scotland.


	16. Chapter 16

**N: and here we are, another chapter. Also, to those readers out there, i'm not too keen on the explicit details of the movie business and the accurate times. it's about the relationship within this unconventional setting, plus i've made it clear these are not normal celebrities going to a red carpet. I'm sure if anyone wants that, they can turn on E! at anytime and get their fill. I know how long it takes for makeup and what not, but it's unnecessary details that would bore the plot down. I only put in important details that further the story...anyway! the leak is revealed in a less than dramatic way, since bo and Lauren have overshadowed it with their own drama. Read on, enjoy and what not!**

* * *

Bo

"So, to go over it again. You've filed for divorce five times? And each time this cretin would refuse to sign, dragging it out until the courts dismissed the petition. Leaving you married in the eyes of the state?" Gillian stood next to me in her bathrobe. Her hair wet as she stared at me. She had interrogated me for the last handful of hours, not trusting what I was telling her. I could tell she was furious with me for hurting her best friend, and I didn't blame her.

I nodded, wiping my nose with a tissue. "Exactly. I'm legally separated from Devin. That happened four months after we were married. But every time I had the papers sent to him, he refused to sign and disappeared. I eventually ran out of money to get a decent lawyer until right before I audition for this job. I sold a bunch of set props from the show and was able to re-file the papers. Then after getting my first paycheck, I could pay for the court fees to push it through without Devin signing it. Next week the court is supposed to make the decision in my favor, setting me free." I frowned, picking at the sleeve of my sweatshirt. I was still in most of my costume, having left the set immediately after Roberto called cut. Gillian and Effy scooped me away to Gillian's rental house, where I was faced with dual interrogation by the two women. I broke down, sobbing while I told them the story of my stupid shotgun wedding. I knew I had hurt Lauren again, keeping a stupid secret. A secret I wanted to keep secret until I had the final papers setting me legally free from the idiot. "Shit, my parents never even knew about this."

Gillian cocked an eyebrow my way. "They do now. The news has hit the states. Lucky for you, only the supermarket rags have taken to the story. The other news sources are too busy with the real drama of your American political system." Gillian let out a sigh. "Lauren is devastated. I hope to hell and back, you didn't do this on purpose. I know hill folk in Ireland that will make it a painful death for you."

I sniffled, leaning my elbows on the edge of the large dining room table. "I would've never started anything with Lauren if I wasn't legally separated and on the verge of being completely divorced. I would never. I don't love him, I don't care about him, I never have from the moment I woke up in that pink honeymoon suite. Realizing what a massive mistake I'd made." I looked up at Gillian. "I've been dealing with this for five years. Devin being a bastard and keeping me on the hook. Waiting and hoping for my next big break he could cash in on." I shook my head, my tears slipping free. "I promise, Gillian, I love Lauren. I've loved her for a very long time. I would never do anything on purpose to hurt her. I've just made stupid mistakes that have taken me longer than I hope to fix, because of other mistakes making it harder to pay court fees."

Gillian gave me a look before she paced behind me. "How did you keep this out of the tabloids now and back then?"

I picked at dried spot of blood on my pants. "Devin didn't care about me filing for divorce, he was off sleeping with the star of the show filming next to us. He was making more money, partying like a rock star, and never living in reality. His antics on set made better headlines. That, and the only witness to our marriage was a James Brown impersonator. That was then. As for now, I can only think it's Devin leaking it to get his face back in the limelight. He hasn't had a job since they killed his character off in season three of the show." I clenched my fists. "I wish I could fly home, punch him in the balls and force him to sign the papers." I bent my head down, the necklace she gave me staring back up at me. Silently asking me to fix this. "God, this is such a mess."

"It certainly is." Gillian sat next to me, patting my arm. "I don't understand why you just didn't tell her, Bo. Tell her before you broke down her walls. Lauren is not the tough, stoic woman you see on set. She's that girl from Boston. The one who has a very big, sensitive heart and loves with everything she has. She loves you Bo, and you hurt her. And I almost hurt you."

I swallowed hard nodding. "I know. I don't know why I didn't tell her. Maybe I thought that since the end was finally near with Devin, I could leave it in the past." I covered Gillian's hand on my arm. "I never loved him, never loved anyone like I love Lauren."

The red head smiled softly. "I know, I can see it in your eyes. Let's just hope Lauren isn't too far gone into her head to come back out."

I winced, my eyes welling up. "Have you heard from her?"

Gillian shook her head. "No. She's ignoring me. Texts, calls, emails, and the like." She pulled me into a half hug. "We'll figure this out, one way or another."

I felt my heart drop, and went to say something when Effy burst into the room, holding up a thick packet of papers. She grinned, pointing at me. "You're not a lying trollop whore." She threw the packet of papers on the table in front of Gillian and I.

"Thanks?" I frowned, sinking further into my chair.

Effy shrugged. "Well, for a minute, I did indeed think you were a trollop of the worst kind. The UK Sentinel is a legitimate news source, even the Queen calls them the most honest in all the land. So, one tends to believe what they write." Effy shoved the thick packet towards me. "But, I never rely on the news in an investigation. I went digging. Called in a few favors with a mate of mine back in the states. He pulled your records." Effy tapped the table as she moved towards Gillian. "You're not lying. There are seven petitions for divorce, all ignored by Devin the dirtbag. One filed legal separation and most recently, this." Effy reached into her coat, pulling out a thin blue envelope. "Congratulations Bo. You're officially divorced."

I stared at her, snatching the envelope out of her hands. "What? I was told this was going to take at least a month. I would have to go back to California and meet with the judge."

Effy winked, bending over to kiss Gillian softly. "I have many strings at my disposal, each pulled in the last few hours. I made it happen. Cost me a few premier tickets, and a dinner with Kiera Knightley." She looked over at me. "I'll be releasing a statement tomorrow on your behalf that the news story is inaccurate, and a feeble attempt by a washed up actor to make money." She moved towards the fridge, grabbing a large plate full of leftover chocolate cake. "And first thing in the morning, I will be firing Elizabeth and barring her from all future productions with this studio, Lauren Lewis, and she'll be blacklisted."

I read over the wording, officially dissolving my marriage, barely listening to Effy until Gillian spoke up. "What was that you said, Lizbet?" She nudged me, forcing my attention towards the grinning woman, eating cake right off the plate with a serving spoon.

Effy threw her arms up. "I am the greatest detective in the world. It's official now." She waved the spoon at the cake. "Anyone?"

Gillian huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. "Darling, explain before I cut the greatest detective in the world off of shower time for a week."

Effy frowned. "Unfair move." She let out a slow breath. "After Lauren left set, I rushed to find Roberto to keep the film moving and suspicions low, then I was on my way to throttle Bo for keeping such a secret from all of us." She smiled softly at me. "Sorry, but my loyalty to Lauren runs deep, and the heartbreak I saw on her face, I wished I still carried a taser."

Effy waved her hand as she continued. "As I passed the cast trailers when I heard something coming out of Elizabeth's trailer. That dolt of girl always kept her windows open, saying the damp air kept her throat moist. Anyway, I poked my head in and saw the wee tramp skyping with Devin. She was holding up the magazine, both of them laughing like terrible Disney villains. She went on, like a horrible Disney movie, revealing that she was the leak all along. Devin and her teaming up to ruin Bo and cash in. Appears both were upset Bo had taken the spotlight away from them. Elizabeth in particular since she auditioned for the lead role."

I felt my anger boil over. "She did this? I trusted her. I saw her as a friend on set. I told her a few things, nothing about Lauren." I shook my head as I stood up, pacing with anger. "It makes sense, she was always hanging around Wynn and I in the beginning."

"Then trailing after me like a lost puppy dog, asking absurd questions about Bo when I was in my trailer." Gillian sighed, running her hands through wet hair. "We were all so stupid. Too wrapped up in making Lauren and Bo's love story happen, that we missed the rat nipping at our heels." The red head looked at Effy with a smirk. "I bet you did something fabulous to scare her, didn't you?"

Effy shrugged. "I might have pulled out the full detective on her. Angrily packed her bags up and shoved her in the back of a cab to the airport. She should be flying economy back to California where she'll be met by Roger with a lawsuit for breach of contract. I did flip Devin off on skype." She took a bite of cake. "That's the good news." She looked directly at me. "I do have bad news."

I chewed on my bottom lip. "How could it be any worse than what just happened." I reached for my phone. "I need to call Lauren, tell her everything and fight for her back."

Effy set the spoon down, walking towards me as she gently took my phone from my hand. "Lauren disappeared. I can't find her. She's not home, not answering her phone, and has fallen off the radar. Not even Roger knows where she is. He just has a London address to ship things to, it's one of her dead drops for fan mail and other packages."

I shook my head, my eyes welling back up. "Did you check her house in California? Boston? Or with her family?" I felt my heart tighten at the thought of Lauren leaving. "You said she was going home, did you really check her house?" I felt panic sink in. My own mess was catching up to me.

"I did. It's as she left it. None of her clothes are packed, her notebooks are still on her desk. But she's not there. All of the cherry coke in her fridge are untouched." Effy frowned. "I'm still working on ideas of where she could go, but a woman with the money she has, she could be anywhere."

I shook my head. "I have to find her." I turned around, running my hands through my hair as I walked to the window. The rain pounding harder. "I have to, I can't let her go like this. Even if she doesn't want me anymore, I have to show her that I wasn't lying to her. I wasn't using her, I love her. I love her so much that I was desperate to keep the past far away from us." I choked out a sob. "I have to find her."

Gillian came up behind me, wrapping an arm around her. "When Lauren is hurt, she hides. She hides better than anyone, but I promise you, Bo. We'll find her. She forgets that I'm on your side, and know most of her secrets."

I leaned into Gillian's side, clutching the necklace. "What if…"

Gillian shushed me. "We don't talk in what if's, Bo. We'll find her, or draw her out." She glanced back at Effy. "We do have the greatest detective in the world on our side."

I sighed, sniffling as I stared out into the rain. I had broken a promise to myself when I saw Lauren again, started up this relationship with her. I had hurt her when I was so desperately trying to protect her.

* * *

XXX

Three weeks later – South of France (Lauren)

I kicked the door to the house shut, throwing my bag onto the floor. I had left the editing suite early this morning, suffering overnight for hours sifting through footage. Clipping and cutting scenes, and staring at Bo, torturing myself at what I still felt for her. It had been three weeks since I left Scotland, and the pain was still there. I had cut myself off from the world, focusing on getting the film completed and out of my hair. I wanted nothing more than to sit on my balcony and drink wine until I passed out.

I had made sure no one could contact me directly. Not even Effy or Gillian. All communication was funneled through the studio to me. I was hiding and dealing with pain the best way I could. The second morning I woke up in France, I saw the magazine headlines next to the café I went to for coffee. It sent me right back to the house where I started making my own morning coffee.

I had thought I'd heal faster, cutting the world away like I'd done in the past, but found I just hurt too much. I knew it was a brash knee jerk reaction to leave like I did, but Bo's secret hurt me. It hurt me because I wanted to be the one she married, I wanted the only one to have ever place a ring on her finger. I also felt like a cheap Hollywood story. Sleeping with my married lead star. I shook my head as I walked to the balcony, grabbing a bottle of wine on my way.

Bo was married. How could I've not know, how did she hide it so well. Why did she hide it?

Sitting down in the large chair I had pulled out onto the balcony of my bedroom, I stared out on the expansive view before me. The ocean in the far distance as the sun, and the warm breeze soothed the headache I had. I poured a very full glass of wine and looked over at the smile pile of mail that came with the last wine delivery. I had at least kept my family in the loop where I was, and since mail delivery was sketchy where I was. I had a pile of personal mail. Probably postcards from my mother as she and my father took a cross country trip.

I sipped the Merlot, sighing at how good it was, and reached for the stack. I wanted to see how far my parents were. Knowing the Grand Canyon would be a highlight for my father. I flipped through the mail, smiling at the silly roadside diner postcards I had. Maybe when I was done with the film, I would take a road trip through France and over the border to wherever in Europe I could go.

I set the last postcard on the table and reached for a thin stack of air mail envelopes. My name and address scrawled across the front. I scrunched my face up, wondering who used air mail anymore, and opened it. Maybe my mother had slipped some fan mail into this pile.

I sipped more wine, opening the first letter. The handwriting was elegant over the very thin stationary.

I was confused reading the strange letter. It was definitely written by a fan as they were all over the place with their thoughts, feeling embarrassed that I was a complete stranger, and yet they felt they knew me. After reading the first one, I moved onto the second one. This one was less awkward, more sweet and put together. I quickly spotted they would sign the letter with a scribble that I couldn't discern a name from.

It took me four letters for it to click, sending my heart spiraling into the pit of my stomach. I was reading exact replicas of my grandparent's letters. The ones where they slowly fell in love and felt hopeless since the war had no end in sight, and were worlds apart. It couldn't be.

I crinkled the letter in my hand, swallowing hard when I heard a familiar voice behind me.

"It was her idea after my Lizbet found you. Write you letters, I just made sure they got to the house. I should've known you'd hide in this paradise. It is an incredible house, I may buy it. Buy it and evict you, then install locks on the doors. You should lock doors, Lauren, keeps the unsavory folk out."

I didn't dare turn around to look at Gillian. "Why…"

Gillian sat in the chair next to me, grabbing my wine glass. "Because, Lauren. Because someone needs to slap you back into reality." She glanced at me, a giant sun hat covering her pale skin, a white sun dress floating around her with the gentle wind. She smiled at me. "You should go out in this French sun, it'd do you wonders." She sipped my merlot, handing over a thin envelope.

I didn't take it, crumpling the letters in my hand as I fought a wave of emotions. "You should go."

Gillian chuckled, setting the envelope down on the table between us. "Nice to see you to. I'll leave after I say my piece. Just be glad I volunteered to walk into the fire and not Lizbet. She'd just tase you and drag you back to the world." She glanced at the letter in my hand. "There's more of those to come. She's been writing you every night, saying it's the only way you'll listen to her. Said something about being your elephant? You Americans are strange ones."

I stood up, throwing the ball of paper on the ground. "Gilly, no. Don't do this. You and Effy have no idea what I feel. The pain, the hurt, the betrayal. You were always rushing to defend…her. Never really listening to why this would hurt so much." I cringed that I couldn't say Bo's name. "I loved her unlike anyone before."

"And still love her. You wouldn't be so angry if you didn't love her. I would know, you moved past me in the blink of an eye." Gillian took her sunglasses off. "What you missed out as you ran like a scared little school girl, was Lizbet and I throwing Bo through the ringer for hurting our beloved pizza girl form Boston. Ready to crucify the girl for every bit of hurt she cast upon your fragile soul. The good detective almost pulled out the fire hose, but luckily for all involved. Bo told the truth from the beginning in regards to this drive thru marriage of last decade." She reached over tapping the envelope with a red glossy fingernail. "In there is her court records. She tried many times, but the American judicial system is a fickle one. Put that together with a selfish man, and you have a divorce that drags out for years. Only when you gave the girl a chance, gave her a decent job did she have the ability to get the courts to side with her." Gillian grinned, filling the glass up with more merlot. "And my incredible girlfriend doing what she does best. Your Bo is a free woman, and wasn't married when she sparked a flame in you. She was legally separated and that marriage was nothing more than a title since the morning after she woke up. Although morally corrupt in the eyes of the church, she was legally able to pursue a relationship with anyone she so chose to."

I closed my eyes, leaning on the balcony railing. "She should have told me. I would've helped her, waited." I glanced at Gillian. "She used me, she hurt me after she promised up and down." I gripped the railing. "It's that convention all over again, her laughing at me." I shook my head as my heart told me I was being stupid, stupid and afraid.

Gillian squinted at me. "What makes you think she used you? I mean I had my suspicions, but when we discovered Elizabeth was in cahoots with Devin. Well, Bo got the shit end of every stick from all the people she trusted and loved." Gillian stood up, moving to where I stood. "I love you Lauren, this is why I'm here. Telling you that you are about to have a fight on your hands in a few days. There's a determined brunette who loves you like the sun, moon and stars, and has set upon her own campaign to win you back, or least get you to talk to her."

I shook my head again. "Gillian, everything is a mess. I'm not sure there's anything left fighting for. I'm just about done with the film. I'll be sending it to the studio in a few weeks, and it'll be done. I can move on." I cleared my throat, a lump forming quickly as my heart started pounding at what I was implicating. "Besides, Bo is in Vancouver. Working on her next film. We're literally on opposite sides of the world."

Gillian laughed, shoving the wine glass towards me. "You wish she was in Vancouver, make it easier for you to ignore what your heart wants, but your stubborn ways will ignore." She reached for the envelope on the table, turning it over. "Bo backed out of that film, taking the mystery thriller set in the fifties one. The same one currently filming a few miles down the road. Seems when we figured out where you dashed off to, Bo wanted to follow. Bring the fight to your doorstep." She patted me on the shoulder, holding up the address of the studio that was truly a few miles away. "If you don't want this, her, better cut her off at the pass. Bo is determined, and ready to charge." Gillian leaned over, kissing me on the cheek. "Don't give up, Lauren. You love her, don't talk yourself out of it over a few hiccups in the road."

I laughed sarcastically. "A secret marriage is more than a tiny hiccup, it's a huge betra…"

Gillian pressed her fingers over my lips. "Shut up, Lauren. Read what I left you, then walk your sweet cheeks down the road. Talk to the woman, listen to her. Then listen to your heart. I'm certain it will tell you everything you need to know."

Gillian took the wine glass back, sashaying away. "I'm off. I have to meet Lizbet at the beach. We're on vacation and will be staying at the hotel down there for the next week. Here's hoping you get your shite sorted out by then, or I will send my Lizbet up here with her taser. Set you straight."

I groaned, refusing to look at Gillian as she left the house. Waving at me from below as she grinned.

I sat on the balcony until I finished the entire bottle of merlot, fortifying myself with liquid courage. I snatched the envelope off the table and ripped it open. I read quickly, reading the legal jargon I barely understood. Only gathering that Bo had filed for divorce three months after the marriage, and continued to do so year after year. Even in the notes of the court files was the comments of the attorney's involved that there was no actual love investment in this marriage. Bo was desperate to move on with her life and had no personal attachment to her ex aside from a formal title handed down by the church and state.

I tossed page after page to the floor after reading it, stopping at the last where Effy's handwriting circled around that studio address.

 _-Don't be completely stupid, Lauren. The queen would never forgive you. Go to her, talk to her. If you can't after that, we will support you._

 _P.s. You were right, Gillian has ruined me in the most incredible way. Thank you for bringing us together. I hope I can do the same for you one day. –_

I frowned, my tears hitting the paper and smearing the ink. I dropped the last page to the floor and looked up. The French sun high and bright as early afternoon struck. It was a beautiful day, the sun badgering me to go outside and take a walk. My heart in cahoots, saying I should take a walk down the road and find the one who always made it skip. I clenched my jaw, letting my mind and heart battle it out until I drew my eyes to one of the air mail letters. A small drawing of an elephant sitting under my name.

I don't know if it was the over abundance of wine I drank on a empty stomach, or if it was the voice of my grandmother whispering with the wine, but I stood up from the balcony. Walked to the front door, grabbed my sunglasses and keys, and walked outside. I glanced once at the address Effy scribbled, jammed the paper back in my jeans pocket and wobbled down the street.

I had no idea what I was doing, I was too busy overthinking to stop and think what exactly I was going to do.

Fifteen minutes later, I walked into the small set the overexcited security guard directed me to. He recognized me immediately and almost peed his pants in getting my autograph for his mother. I gave him one, making him promise he took me where the film "A Dark Ocean." was being filmed. He left me at the door, letting me know that the crew was on lunch break, but a few of the actors were still lingering.

I nodded my thanks, steeled myself as the wine was sloshing my balance around, and pushed open the door. I scanned the room, smiling at a few familiar faces as I walked through the sets. To the random passerby, I looked like a bum in my holey jeans, and linen shirt. One of the crew perhaps. I took the advantage and moved through the other crew members, looking for her.

I pushed my sunglasses up, the set too dark for me to navigate while a little drunk. I kept scanning, feeling my heart back off as my sensible ways told me I should just leave, this wasn't worth it.

Then I heard her laugh. And it stopped me in my tracks. It was her laugh that was one of my favorite sounds in the world. No matter the time of day, the moment before or after making her laugh, it was a sound I cherished. Loved. I closed my eyes for a moment, my heart telling me that there was no way out of it. I still loved Bo with everything I was. Especially if the sound of her laughing had this much of an impact on me.

I sucked in a breath, and turned my head to the sound. Bo was standing off to the side with another actor in costume. They were chatting politely, but I couldn't stop staring. Staring at Bo in her costume of a vintage blue seer sucker dress, her hair up in a ponytail, showing off her neck. I swallowed hard as I became frozen staring at her. She was beautiful, even more beautiful than I last saw her.

Then the actor she was talking to, pointed my way, directing Bo to look over. When she did, our eyes met instantly and her grin faded into a shocked smile. She tipped her head down after staring at me for a second, and walked towards me.

I blew out a slow breath, trying to turn and make a quick exit, but the wine. The damn wine had whittled away my senses, I was more likely to fall over than run gracefully away.

I was too busy debating on how to make my exit, that I didn't notice Bo was now standing in front of me.

"Gillian found you, I see." Her voice was tentative.

I nodded, swallowing hard. "Yeah." I looked around the set, trying not to look at Bo. "Um, you backed out of the Vancouver movie? That had a good director attached to it."

Bo stepped closer to me. "Yes, it did. But this movie was closer to the one director I adore." She smiled softly, searching my eyes. "Lauren, I need to tell you so much."

I shook my head taking a step back and almost tripping over a cable cord. Bo had to reach out and grab me, her warm hand sending those little lightning bolts through my skin. "Lauren, are you okay?"

I glanced at her hand on my skin, moving my eyes up to spot the necklace I gave her still around her neck. "I'm drunk." I shrugged. "It was the only way I could bare to come down here. I think too much, and would think my way out of coming down here." I scrunched up my face, slowly pulling my arm free from her hand. Hating the way my skin always felt without her touch. "I should go." I turned to walk out off the set, when Bo spoke.

"You once asked me to be your elephant, Lauren. Be your elephant and always remind you how much you loved me." Bo looked at me with glassy brown eyes. "I love you, Lauren. I will never forget, and won't let you forget how much I still love you." She took a step closer to me. "Please, give me a chance. A chance to explain why."

I stared at her, my head swimming from everything. The wine, the heat, the flush of being in the presence of a woman who had the effect Bo did on me. "Bo…"

"Please. I'm here to fight for you, us. Let me have a chance." She looked harder at me. Determination flooding her eyes. I went to open my mouth, tell her it wasn't a good idea, when the production assistant called the cast back to set. Bo looked over her shoulder, smiling at the rest of the cast. I caught a glimpse of the cameo on her necklace, the white woman staring at me in a way that had my heart slapping me in the face. Bo turned back around, her smile tight and polite. "I should go back. I guess I'll see you around, Lauren." Her tone was one of defeat, my hesitation sending her clear signals.

I shook my head, silently cursing an inanimate object, and grabbed Bo's forearm gently. "Gillian knows where my house is." I let go of her arm when one of her cast mates gave me a dirty look. I tucked my hands into my pockets and stepped back. "I'll be there, Bo."

"Okay." Bo smiled, and turned back to walk over to the rest of the cast. Casting one more glance over her shoulder to look my way.

I waited until she disappeared into a fake car, before I pulled my sunglasses down and stumbled out of the set. The second I was outside, I tilted my head up at the sun, letting it beat down on my face.

I stayed like that until the security guard rushed up to me, asking if I needed anything. I nodded, smiling at him. "I need a cab back to my house. But first can you have the Royal Hotel send up a case of their finest wine and have it charged to the room of a Gillian Harris?"

The security guard nodded eagerly and got on his phone immediately while I sat down on the ground, leaning against the studio wall and cradling my head. I had no idea what the hell I was doing, but whatever it was, I needed more wine.


	17. Chapter 17

**N: it is what it is. There's more to come in the next few chapters...or whatnot. I'm still thinking about it. Anyway! read on and enjoy! then go to amazon and buy a few books under the moniker Sydney Gibson! And if you have kindle unlimited, go read a few books for free! Okay...theres that. I'm off to PT now.**

* * *

Bo

I practically sprinted to my trailer the second the day wrapped. I had managed to keep my cool after Lauren's impromptu appearance, but now, I was eager to get off set and find her. I saw in her eyes, past the wine she drank, that I was skating on very thin ice and still had a lot of work ahead of me.

I shucked out of the dress, hanging it up delicately on the rack for the wardrobe department to take pictures of and clean, and threw on a pair of linen pants and a loose top. This part of France was warmer than I expected, a drastic change from the biting cold of England and Scotland. I went to grab my purse and phone, ready to text Gillian to give me that address she had, when my co-star popped her head in the door. "Hey Bo, I'm glad I caught you."

I glanced at Ashley. "I'm about to head out the door." I tucked my phone in my pocket, smiling at the girl. Ashely was younger than I, and I had picked up that she was inordinately interested in me. I had a feeling I was a few days away from being asked out to dinner, or be her best friend. It was hard to pick up which vibe at the moment. She was pretty, talented, but my heart was set on another. I took a step towards the door, reaching for my sunglasses. "Did you need something?"

Ashley shrugged, smiling as she leaned against the doorway. "A few of us are trolling down to the hotel for drinks. I was sent in to convince you to come out."

I smiled. "I'd love to, but I'm meeting a friend of mine at the beach. They just flew in yesterday and with our tight schedule, I'd like to catch up with them before they leave this weekend." I moved towards the door. "Maybe next time? I'm really looking forward to these two days off. It's been crazy bouncing from the last movie to this one."

Ashley stepped out with me. Squinting at the bright sun. "I hear you. I once did back to backs. It's rough." She glanced at me. "Hey, I meant to ask you. Was that Lauren Lewis you were talking to during lunch?"

I felt my smile tighten as I pushed my sunglasses on. "It was. She's in town working on editing the film. She stopped by to say hello as she passed through sets."

Ashley hummed. "Man, the drama on that set. I was shocked when the studio press release tore apart the tabloid lies. It was crazy to watch the love triangles shift every week. That ex-husband of yours is in for some heavy litigation, I was blown away by his Jerry Springer move." Ashely chuckled. "I heard Lauren was having a on set affair, again, with Gillian Harris. Is that true? Lauren is so cold in interviews, how could anyone find her desirable? I imagine her hiding in the dark, brooding over what next great drama can she write. Add another Oscar to her growing pile. She looked a little moody earlier, during your conversation. A little moody and a little grabby."

I clenched my jaw, shifting my purse higher on my shoulder, ignoring the last of Ashley's comment. "It was all horrible rumors created by Elizabeth. You read all the same garbage papers I did. It's all lies, and garbage created out of jealousy." I smiled tightly, looking past Ashley at a few crew members walking past us and waving hello. I waved back. " I can also tell you that I know for a fact Gillian and Lauren were not in a relationship. Elizabeth created those lies out of innocent moments." I looked at Ashley. "And as for my ex-husband? He's not existed in my life for many years. You can read that press release from my agent, I'll get you a copy if you'd like one."

I reached back, closing the door to my trailer, trying so very hard not to raise my voice, or tell Ashley to piss off. "The tabloids are misguided about Lauren. She's an incredible director, person, and has a big warm heart that all of us on that cast would defend to the end." I cleared my throat, knowing my tone was getting a little too agitated. "Anyway, I need to go before I'm late. I'll see you in two days, Ashley."

Ashley smiled, nodded, but gave me a curious look as I rushed off towards the back lot of the studio. The drama was still ripe, and following all of us. It just barely started dying down over the last week since Gillian and Effy arrived in France. The tabloids finding a new target to splatter all over their front pages, making my current drama very ancient news.

I rushed through the back lot and up onto the tiny winding streets of the town around the studio. I checked my phone, my stomach turning reading Gillian's message with Lauren's address and a motivational smiley face. Her house was a short walk up the hill. All this time, well the last two weeks, Lauren was right around the corner from me. That thought alone made me believe fate had something to do with this. I smiled, running my hand over the necklace I refused to take off in between scenes. Lucky for me, this new director liked it for my character, and kept it with my wardrobe. Now I never had to take it off.

I tucked the phone away, focusing on calming my nerves. I had no idea what was waiting for me at Lauren's. I wasn't sure I could break through to her this time. I had hurt her deeply twice. Leaving myself with a huge mess to sort out and a broken heart to put back together.

* * *

Before long, I was at the front door of Lauren's house. And what a massive house it was. Bigger than anything I'd ever seen in person, and it added to my nerves. Lauren was bigger than anything I'd ever conquered in my life. My feelings for her, the fight and drive to fix our relationship. All of it made me the most driven I'd ever been in my life. I had to win my girl back.

I smiled softly, reaching for the door. My girl. Lauren was my girl.

I went to knock on the bright blue door, but as my knuckles grazed it, it swung open. I poked my head in, calling out for Lauren as I took in the opulence of the interior. "Lauren? Are you home?"

"No, I'm not." A slurred voice came from around the corner.

I frowned, and stepped inside. "Are you sure you're not home?"

"Nope. No one's here."

I followed the raspy, clearly intoxicated voice. "Sounds like there's someone here." I turned the corner to my left, finding Lauren sitting on the floor against a giant canopy bed. Two empty bottles of wine sat at her feet. A full case of very expensive wine sat next to her arm. Lauren looked like a sunburned bum on the beach. Her cheeks were red from the sun, her hair messy from the ocean wind. She looked down at her hands cradling a half empty glass of wine, twirling it and staring as the red liquid moved in tiny little waves.

I sighed, setting my purse on the floor and folded my arms across my chest. "Looks like you're having a party for one."

Lauren shrugged, drawing very drunk amber eyes my way. "Guess so." She squinted at me. "Your hair is different, it's lighter." Every word she spoke came out slow, and laden with alcohol.

I sighed, moving towards the blonde. "I had to highlight it for this new role." I crouched down next to Lauren. I wanted to reach out, pull her into my arms and hold her.

"I kinda like it, Ysabeau." Lauren smirked as she over pronounced the syllables of my name. "Did he ever call you by your first name?"

I looked in her eyes, trying hard not to be angry at her state. "No. He never knew my full name." I reached for the wine glass in her hand. "Only you, Lauren. You're the only one outside of my family."

Lauren pulled the wine glass away. "Mine, and I don't like to _share_." She emphasized the word. She then elbowed the case next to me. "Get your own bottle. Gillian paid for it, maybe you should go see her instead. She's over at the hotel, but you know that. You three musketeers always meddling in my heart." Lauren's tone had bite to it. The alcohol doing its job in whittling her guard down.

I pushed the case away. "I'd rather have water. I think you should have some too." I stood up, spotting a kitchen just past the front door I'd come in. I glanced at Lauren, her eyes drifting away from me. I saw heavy tears rimming the edges of her beautiful eyes. It made me swallow hard and hurry towards the kitchen before I lost my own control. A sad Lauren was a weakness of mine.

After finding a few large bottles of water in the fridge, I came back to Lauren and sat down on the floor, facing her. "Here." I pushed one into her lap, lifting the wine glass from her rubbery hands. "Drink this." Lauren frowned at me, trying to grab for the glass. I shook my head, drinking what little wine was left. "No more. I came here to talk to you. Instead I find you drunk off your ass."

Lauren shrugged. "Why do you care if I'm drunk? It's not like we're married." She glared at me. "But I hear congratulations are in order. You're freshly divorced." She picked up an empty bottle, frowning when she discovered it was dry. "I should find irony in the gay divorcee title, but." She drew hazy eyes my way, throwing silent daggers. Drunken daggers, but daggers none the less.

I clenched my jaw. I knew, in a way, I deserved some of this shit she was slinging. But I didn't deserve the way she was slinging it. "Lauren."

"No. No, don't Lauren me. You hurt me, Bo. You didn't tell me a pretty huge part of your life. Promised me up and down that you never wanted to hurt me. Over and Over. And I believed you, Bo. I believed you through and through." Lauren reached behind her, using the bed to steady herself as she stood up on wine soaked legs. "Then I find out through the one outlet I detest, you're a married woman! I was sleeping with a married woman, sharing my bed and heart with a married woman! Loving with all of my broken heart, a married woman!"

Lauren's voice rose as she found her footing and took a step towards me, looking down at the rich marble floors. "Why didn't you tell me? Why did you hide it from me?! All those things you said to me, all those things I shared with you. I gave you me. My open honest me." Lauren pressed a hand over her heart. "This was yours, is yours. I can't bottle back up what you released. It hurts so much. It hurts, Bo." She shook her head as a few tears trailed down her cheeks. "Such bullshit." She half yelled the words out, bending down for another bottle of wine. "Just go, Bo. We don't need to talk, it's not like you'll tell me the truth."

The last part, bit deep. I shot to my feet, grabbing Lauren's arm and pulling her attention to me. "That's bullshit, Lauren. You know, even though you're hammered off your ass, that everything I told you was honest. The way I felt about you. How much I loved you, still love you. Everything! It's all been real and honest. I've fought for years to have this chance with you. I'm not giving in so easily."

I held strong, staring at the woman. She was destroyed, broken and it was because of me. I swallowed hard, taking in a steady breath. "Yes, my past got in the way. A past I didn't tell you about because it was important to me. It was a piece of paper signed by a fake Elvis that meant nothing to me." I had raised my voice to the point of yelling at the blonde. But I was done, this was clearly the only way she was going to listen to me. "You mean everything to me, Lauren. So, go ahead. Shit all over me, call me names, but I'm going to fight you until I see in your eyes there's nothing to fight for. I honestly don't understand why a stupid fucking shotgun wedding five years ago, means so much to you, when it means absolutely nothing to me. It never meant anything." I let go of her. The look in her eyes could have set the house on fire, forcing me to take a lengthy step away from her before she drove those blazing eyes deeper into my heart. "I love you." I spoke each of the word hard, emphasizing them so she would hear them. Feel them.

"It means so much to me, because I wanted to be the only one you married. I want to be the only person in the world who asked you to give your forever to me. I wanted to marry you!" Lauren yelled back, causing me to flinch. I watched as her cheeks flushed with passion. "That's why it bothered me so fucking much. Knowing I'll never be the first one in your life. I've loved you from the moment I first saw you, Bo. Dreamt, even when I hated you, that one day we would marry. You've always been my one true love." She shook her head, a sob cutting her words off. "Fuck it. Fuck this." She bent over for the wine again, stumbling forward and tripping over the box of wine in front of her. I reached out, catching her in my arms before Lauren's face met the very expensive granite floors.

I clenched my jaw at the way she felt in my arms. Warm, solid, and mine. Something I had missed over the last few weeks. I went to push her away, when I heard a painful sob crawl out of her throat, and strong arms wrap around me. Lauren drew me in tighter against her body, sobbing heavily. I could only drop my arms around her waist, and hold her. I was stunned, shocked at her words. The brutal honesty of each one of them shoving their way into my heart like tiny spears. I was also blown away by her anger, something I had never seen from the woman. Combine that with the impact of what she just confessed, it all finally made sense now. It made perfect sense why she would be so hurt by my cruddy past. Even through the shocked feelings of what happened in the last ten minutes, I felt my heart swell in my chest. There was a tiny glimmer of hope for me, for us. Lauren held onto me as she continued to let out all the hurt and pain I placed there. Crying into my shoulder, sagging in my arms as she mumbled into my shirt. "I'm going to throw up."

I heard the muffled words clearly, not expecting those particular words, and leaned back. "Where's the bathroom?" I threw an arm around her waist, taking on some of her dead weight.

Lauren swallowed hard, her face turning green as she waved off to the side of the bed. I nodded, half carrying and half dragging the woman to the bathroom. The second she saw the toilet, Lauren dropped to her knees and gave the porcelain gods hell. I sat next to her on the floor after soaking a washcloth in cold water, rubbing her back as bottle, after bottle, of that very expensive wine came back up. I sighed, looking at the art on the wall waiting for Lauren to finish.

A few minutes later, Lauren slumped away from the toilet. Her head landing in my lap, exhaustion creeping in with what was going to be one hell of a hangover. I smiled, wiping her forehead with the washcloth. "How are you feeling?"

Lauren swallowed a few times, clutching to my leg. "I hate myself."

I laughed to myself. "I bet." I waited a few more minutes until she looked a little less green, and gently got her to sit up. "I need to get you to bed. This hard floor isn't good for you."

Lauren groaned. "But it's cold." Her voice was raspy, and all the fight had gone out of her with the wine. "It feels good."

I helped to her feet, letting her rest all her weight on me as I guided her back to the bed. "I'll make the room as cold as the north pole for you." I moved to the edge of the bed, setting Lauren there as I rushed around the room, closing the balcony doors and a few other windows left open. After the house was sealed, I turned on the air conditioning to the lowest level and returned to the bed. Lauren was curled up in a ball, already passed out.

I sighed looking at her. I had so much to say to her, but knew she wouldn't hear any of it. I shook my head, and set a bottle of water next to her on the table. I grabbed one of the blankets on the bottom of the bed, and covered Lauren with it. She snuggled into the pillows, letting out a ragged breath and mumbling incoherently. I stared at her, waiting for any sign that she would have to go back to the bathroom. I smiled, shaking my head. The amount she threw up, there was going to be nothing left in her stomach.

I reached down, brushing her hair away from her neck, when Lauren grabbed my hand, pulling it against her chest. I could feel her pounding heart against my palm. She turned, opening her eyes to look right at me with red, puffy eyes. "Will you be here when I wake up, Ysabeau?"

I grinned at the way she said my name, and nodded. "If you want me to be, yes."

Lauren smiled softly, snuggling deeper into the pillow. "Good, I want you to be here. I love you so much, Bo." She then let out a heavy breath, and fell back to sleep.

"I love you, Lauren." I whispered the words back, not caring if she heard them or not. I would tell her again the moment she woke up, and never stop telling her for the rest of my life.

* * *

XXXXX

Lauren

The shooting white hot pain in my head, woke me up. The entire room hurt to look at, making me wince and cover my eyes. I eventually closed my eyes, the sound of blinking was way too loud for this headache. I squinted, trying to figure out if I was dead or alive. I swallowed, cringing at the horrible taste in my mouth. A mix of wet dog and old grapes.

I went to sit up, clutching my spinning head when I heard a quiet voice next to me. "Careful, you're very dehydrated."

I slowly turned my head to look at Bo sitting in the bed next to me. She smiled sleepily, holding out a large bottle of water. "Drink this."

I nodded, wincing at the movement and sipped from the bottle. I kept looking at Bo, her hair was lighter and it made her almost glow in the low evening light flooding into the room. I blinked a few times, trying very hard to remember how and why Bo was in my bed. The last thing I remembered was visiting her on the set, then walking out scared shitless of talking to her. I sipped more of the water, noticing Bo was huddled under a pile of blankets, shivering. "Why is it so cold in here?"

Bo smiled. "I had to bribe you with a cold room to get you off the bathroom floor."

I raised my eyebrows. "Bathroom floor?"

Bo nodded, shifting to get out of the bed. "Yes. You had a healthy conversation with the toilet bowl over a few bottles of wine." She slid off the bed, walking over to the balcony doors, and pulled them open. The warm breeze cut through the chill easily. "And a healthy conversation with me."

I tipped my head down, fidgeting with the water bottle, my memory starting to kick in. The things I said, coming in snippets and how horrible I was. "Bo, I should apologize." I frowned, remembering that I had drank three bottles of wine throughout the day. My attempt to build up some courage to face her, hear her side.

She shook her head, pulling off the blanket and setting it on the end of the bed. "You don't need to. You deserve to say what you needed to." She smiled tightly, moving to the side table. She tapped a white bottle of aspirin. "You should take a few of those to ease the headache. I'll grab a few more bottles of water for you before I leave."

I swallowed hard. I didn't want her to leave. I wanted Bo to stay, I wanted to talk to her sober. More than anything, I just wanted her to stay. No matter my muddled feelings for her, I missed Bo. I missed her energy, her presence, the way her perfume made me think of home. I watched Bo move around through the rooms. There was something different about her, she moved with determination and ease. As if the weight of her past was finally lifted off her shoulders, and she could breathe.

I stared at her, well squinted at her, as she came back with the water. She then moved back towards where her purse sat on the floor. "Okay. I think you're good. I'm going to go home. It's late." She looked at me tentatively. Making me wonder what the hell vile did I spew when I was drunk. She turned, reaching for her purse.

"Bananas." I blurted the word out, watching Bo freeze and look over her shoulder at me.

Her eyes were glossy as she whispered. "Bananas back at you."

I bit my bottom lip, trying to hold back the stupid grin from forming. "Will you stay? I'm not sure of much right now, but all I know is that I want you to stay, Bo." I shrugged, my eyes welling up. "I'm sorry…" I had a million other things I needed to say, but could only say those two words. I had taken her mess and made it a bigger mess. "I'm not strong like you think I am. I'm just a scared jerk."

Bo shook her head, rushing over to the bed and scooping me into her arms. I buried my face into her shoulder, squeezing her back as she whispered against my ear. "Never say you're sorry, Lauren. We both made a mess out of things, but I'm not going anywhere until we fix it." She leaned back, wiping away my tears. "Now, let's get you cleaned up and then we can talk."

I smiled softly, leaning into her hands. "As long as there's no wine in sight." I let out a slow breath, my stomach gurgling.

Bo chuckled. "Don't worry, Gillian picked up the rest of the case an hour ago. Cursed you in Gaelic while Effy took pictures of you drooling all over the pillow." She kissed my forehead as I groaned. "I wished I was kidding, but I'm not. Expect to pay off their entire vacation as payback. Gillian's exact words."

I frowned, leaning back into Bo's arms. "I would be pissed at her, but I deserve it."

Bo laughed nodding as she took my hand and helped me off the bed. Laughing harder as I wobbled like a newborn calf towards the bathroom. "I'm never drinking expensive wine ever again."


	18. Chapter 18

**N: a short one. This one was hard to navigate out, but i got it out. There will be some more mild drama to come, nature of the business these girls are in. The next chapter will have some fun and whatnot in it, i think. So, read on! Enjoy!**

* * *

My head pounded, a constant reminder of what I had done to myself. I would never drink wine again. I cringed at the mere thought of the liquid, my stomach rolling in agreement. I rubbed it, whispering apologies to my entire body as I laid along the soft couch on the back patio. The patio attached to a massive eternity pool, and faced the mountains that rolled over the town. It had cooled down as the sun started to set, and Bo left me out here as she went to find a grocery store. My entire kitchen was empty of decent food, I hadn't bothered to eat much since I landed in France. Focusing on finishing the film and my own misery, instead of shopping for food and other necessities.

I sighed, rolling over onto my side, looking over at the water reflecting the dwindling sunlight. I took my sunglasses off, setting them on the ground next to me. Bo had been there after I showered, smiling at me with a new sense of nervousness that carried over to me. My memory was still filling me in on what I had said to her while drunk, most of it very mean and stupid. I frowned at my own behavior. I was a scared jerk, and lashed out at the one person I loved. I knew I could have prevented all this mess if I had kept my cool and didn't let my jerky ways control everything. I wondered if Bo could forgive me, if we could move past this, or if it would be rocky roads from now on.

I sat up, slowly getting up from the couch and walked to the edge of the pool. I stared at the water, trying to think, but my hazy mind wasn't letting move past certain thoughts.

"Please don't jump, I can't swim."

I turned to look over my shoulder, Bo standing at the patio door with bags full of fresh food. I shook my head. "Neither can I, that's why I just put my house up for sale back in California. England will be my home for awhile."

Bo smirked. "Then why do you have such a huge pool?" She motioned for me to follow her into the kitchen. "And England is an island. It's no better than California if it's oceans you're worried about."

I followed her, my stomach calling out that it would like to have something to eat. I pressed a hand against it, hoping to quiet it down. "It came with the house. And I hate California because of Hollywood. I grew attached to the privacy Nottingham offered me, plus the rain makes for perfect writing weather." I stopped at the counter, reaching into one bag for the large loaf of fresh bread. "The only reason I rented this house was because of the balcony view from the bedroom. The rest I barely looked at." I tore a hunk off the bread, popping it into my mouth.

Bo smiled, pulling out fresh eggs and cheese. "I thought maybe an omelet would be safe for your stomach. I have some potatoes too, help soak up the rest of your hangover." She glanced around the kitchen, looking for pots and pans. "Where are your cooking things?"

I shrugged. "Maybe in the cabinet next to the stove? I'm not really sure." I picked at the bread. "You don't have to make anything, Bo. I can manage, if you want to go home."

Bo set a frying pan on top of the stove, clicking the burners on. "I could, and probably should, but I'm not going to." She looked at me, reaching for the crate of eggs. "I told you I'm in the fight. I have to do everything I can to win you back, Lauren. If that includes making you a hangover special, so be it. I'm only in France for another three weeks before production moves to Venice for the last half of the shoot. I have to make the most of the time I have with you."

I noticed the fear in her tone, that all she had was these three weeks to make us an us again. Leading me to believe that Bo thought she was in this fight alone, which she was, because I had definitely led her to believe that. I stepped to stand next to her at the stove, watching her beat eggs with a fury. "Bo, I'm the one who needs to win you back." I looked at the chunk of bread in my hand. "I wasn't black out drunk, like I wished I was. I'm remembering a lot of what I said, and if you wanted to walk out that door, and never see me again…"

"Lauren, stop." Bo poured the eggs into the pan. "Let's not rehash over what drunk Lauren said." She pointed at the potatoes next to the bag. "You mind washing those and cutting them up?"

I nodded, doing as she asked and continued talking. "I mean it Bo. I'm a jerk. I was a jerk to you." I dropped the potatoes on the counter and started cutting them into small pieces. My stomach growling in excitement from the smell of eggs cooking.

Bo set the spatula down, grabbed my arm and pulled me to look at her. I was startled, and opened my mouth to say something when she kissed me hard. I went to grab her hips, when she parted from me. "Lauren, no more pity party. Yes, you're a jerk. A big jerk for bolting on me before I had a chance to explain anything. You hurt me, but I always knew you were scared, so I will forgive you. This relationship has a weird past, but I want to make a future with you. God, do I want a future with you." Bo looked up at the ceiling, her eyes bright. "So, I'm here. I love you. And if you want to make a competition out of who should be fighting for who, let's just do this. Let's start over. Take today as the first day of fighting together for each other." She slid her hand down my arm, winding it in mine. "You're my jerk, and there's literally nothing in the world that would chase me from you." She smiled softly. "So, what do you say?"

I looked down at our hands together. "I say bananas." I closed my eyes as the sound of Bo laughing, smiling. "I missed the sound of your laugh." I sighed, opening my eyes to look right at the woman who kept me on my toes in all of the right, and wrong ways.

Bo grinned, kissing me once more before stepping back to the frying pan to add a healthy pile of freshly grated cheese to it. "Good, because I missed the sound of you telling me that." She waved at the potatoes. "Hurry up or I'll eat without you."

I saluted her and went back to work. Although the tension in the air seemed to ease away, I knew I, we, had a lot of work ahead of us. Especially when our work lives beckoned once again. But for now, I was content with my hangover headache and cutting up potatoes. It was simple, easy, and normal. Three things I hadn't had in a very long time.

XXX

"Connor is a very different director than you. He moves fast, has very little to say about performances, and relies on his assistant director to do much of the work." Bo sat on the patio couch next to me. Her empty plate on her lap as she stared out into the pool, telling me about her new film. "The cast isn't as tight as Gillian, Karen, Alan, and Wynn were. They all seem to go off on their own, only meeting up for drinks here and there. I usually go home after work and do my own thing." She smiled, shrugging. "I try to stay to myself. The tabloid stories followed me here and I've had some nosy people asking me if it was all true. If it's true what they say about you being cold and unapproachable." There was a look on Bo's face that told me there was more to the story than what she was telling me. I made a note to call Gillian in the morning and have her steely lady love check it out.

"I hope you sic Effy on them. In all honesty, I am cold and unapproachable, especially if I don't like you. I feel like I need to meet these nosy people and intimidate them with my freeze stare." I leaned back into the couch. My stomach was happy with me, filled with delicious cheese omelet and fried potatoes. My headache was gone, and I was feeling pretty content. "I heard through my editor you hired her as your personal PR manager."

Bo's cheeks flushed. "I did. I'm sorry I stole her, but we didn't know when you'd pop back up and I needed a trusted person." Bo shifted in her seat. "Were you ever going to come back? If I hadn't chased you down?" Her voice grew quiet.

"I honestly don't know. I just barely came up with an idea to taking a road trip in two weeks when I'm done with the editing part. Drive around Europe until maybe award season, and then debate returning to California if the film had nominations." I stared at Bo, still looking over the water and looking gorgeous. How I could ever leave this beautiful woman, I don't know. "Thank god for the tenacious three lady musketeers. Determined to keep the shy girl from Boston from burying her head in the sand."

Bo grinned, standing up from the couch and grabbed my empty plate. "Thank the fiery redhead and her bull headed English girlfriend. There was a couple of times I wanted to give up. My frustration overwhelming me." She walked back into the kitchen, coming out shortly with an ice-cold bottle of cherry coke. She set it in my lap. "Do you know how hard this is to find in France? I went to three different shops until I found it in the back of a butcher shop."

I grinned, holding the bottle. "Virtually impossible. I know, I had the stuff imported. My four cases should be arriving tomorrow." Bo sat down next to me, moving a little closer. I set the bottle on the ground, and reached for Bo. Pulling her into my arms. "I'm glad you didn't give into your frustration."

Bo sighed, resting her head on my chest. "It was a close one. Then I got a lecture from Gillian, and I changed my mind. She has a really unique way about her. Her lectures feel like a mother, a dictator, and your father all rolled into one. It's strange, but effective."

I laughed. "It really is." I looked at the sky as the sun dipped past the horizon, casting the patio in darkness until the auto lights flicked on. I frowned, knowing that it was probably time for Bo to go home. "I can call a car to take you home, if you'd like. I don't want you walking home at night." I really wanted to ask her to stay the night, stay with me. I didn't want anything more from Bo than her comfort and the way she hogged all the blankets. It was the little things I craved to latch onto, and give me strength I could fix us.

Bo sat up, running her hands over her hair. "I have a car service. Provided by the studio." She stood up, smoothing out her shirt and looking away from me. "I'm off for the next two days. I'll leave you my number, if you want to get lunch tomorrow and walk around the town. I'm meeting Gillian and Effy for dinner, you can join us. I know they'd like to see you." Bo looked around for her purse. "I just need to grab my purse. I think I left it in the kitchen." She stepped away, heading to go back into the house.

That's when I realized I was in control of this situation. Bo wasn't going to push where she didn't feel it was right to push. But she was pushing me to come out of my jerky shell, and do what I needed to show her I wanted us.

I stood up from the couch quickly and rushed into the house. Bo was at the counter, on her phone. She smiled sadly at me. "I just need to text the driver. The car will be here in five minutes." She waved at piece of paper on the counter. "My number is there. Call me…"

"Bo do you really want to go home?" I spit the words out. "I mean, I bet your rental is nice and very French. But I have an extra room here, or that giant bed over there. I have extra clothes in the closet from when Gillian stayed here. They were too conservative for her, and they should fit you. Maybe not the pants. Gillian is tall like a god damn redwood, but the shirts should work. I have some shorts you can sleep in and a few old promotional shirts I stole from Spielberg's premiere." I waved my hands around, rambling. "There's a TV at the end of the bed, like the one in my Nottingham house. We could watch a movie, or some shows, or I could show you the rough cut of the movie." I shrugged. "Or I'll just wait at the front door for your car to arrive."

I took a step towards the door when I heard Bo. "I don't want to go home, Lauren, and I just canceled the car." I heard her set the phone down, chuckling. "Aren't we a pair? Two grown women acting like nervous teenagers."

I turned watching her walk towards me. She did indeed make me feel like a nervous teenager. A nervous teenager in love for the first time. "So, should I show you the spare room?"

Bo shook her head. "Lauren, it's only half past eight in the evening." She reached for my hand. "Why don't we watch a movie and talk. You know that was my favorite memory of England? Granted I was deathly ill, coughing up a lung, but cuddling with you and watching that movie. It was the first time in a very long time, that I felt like belonged. Belonged to someone."

I swallowed hard. "You really didn't watch the movie, you passed out in the middle of it. Snoring against my chest." I smiled at Bo, tugging her closer. "But it was also one of my favorite moments of England. Anytime you were next to me, and it was just us, was when I finally felt like I could have a normal life inside of this extraordinary one I lead." I sighed. "I'll let you pick the movie."

Bo's eyes grew wide in mild shock. "You never let me pick the movie!"

I nodded firmly. "I know, but I'm trying to be a new me. A new Lauren who isn't a jerk about everything, including picking boring movies that put you to sleep in the first twenty minutes." I chuckled, letting go of Bo's hand. She had fallen asleep every time we went to bed and I put on a movie. I always chose fancy, boring movies to watch, putting her to sleep in the blink of an eye. I gently shoved her. "Go. The closet next to the bathroom has clothes in it. Go change while close up the house."

Bo kissed me on the cheek and hurried away. I smiled, yawning as I set about locking the doors in the house, only leaving the balcony door cracked to let some fresh air in. I then changed into the old t-shirt and shorts I had left on the floor from this morning, listening to the water run in the bathroom. I smiled and crawled into the bed, reaching for the TV remote. Bo came out of the bathroom in one of my larger Indiana Jones shirts that reached to mid-thigh and a pair of my baggy linen shorts. She held her arms out. "Is this okay?"

She looked incredible with a freshly washed face, her hair pulled back and looking adorable. "Perfect." I pointed at the TV at the end of the bed, holding out the large remote for her to take. "Go ahead, ladies' choice."

Bo grinned and climbed into the bed, settling in on her side next to me and starting navigating through the menus. She stopped on one, looking at me cautiously. "Is this okay?"

I laughed again, laying down into the mountain of pillows behind me. Bo had picked a recent romantic comedy that was a box office smash. I had seen it once, thought it was okay, but wasn't in love with it. But looking in Bo's eager eyes, I could tell it was one of her favorites. I ran a hand down her arm. "It's perfect."

She grinned wider, hit play and laid back into the pillows next to me. I didn't really watch the movie, I was exhausted from the day and my eyes kept falling close. Only Bo laughing here and there kept me awake. Finally, I gave up and rolled onto my side, snuggling deep into Bo's body warmth. She moved her arm so I could lay on her chest, and took a few deep breaths. I was half awake, and half on the verge of falling into a deep sleep, when I heard. "Will you marry me one day, Lauren? Be my only and forever?" Bo spoke so softly, I figured she thought I was asleep. "After we work out our mess, I want to marry you. Marry you and be _your_ wife. No one else's."

I smiled against her, nodding as I whispered back. "Ask me again in three weeks, but the answer will probably be yes." I snuggled deeper into Bo as she pulled me closer, her heart racing a thousand miles a minute.

I fell asleep in her arms, listening to her laugh at the silly movie. Thinking to myself that at the end of this journey, I should make a movie about Bo and I. But without the stupid drama.


	19. Chapter 19

**N: i don't know about this one. I keep doing short chapters because i'm usually writing when i get home and all i want to do is go to bed. But have this to read and i might have another update later this week, and i might fix this one tomorrow after i've thought about it. Thank you all for reading and sticking with me with this strange therapy project that's helping get through a few things and back on to writing. Enjoy!**

* * *

 **Bo**

I must have the balls the size of a small country, proposing to Lauren when I thought she was asleep. I almost had a heart attack when she mumbled out her answer, only catching something about asking her again in three weeks. I was one hundred percent sure she was passed out, and I was swept up in the mood of the movie. The words spilled up from my heart, out my mouth, and fell onto her ears.

Now it was late morning, and I was standing outside the front door waiting for Lauren to come out. We had gotten up, eaten breakfast, and got ready for the day, all in comfortable conversation. It was comfortable enough, until I realized what I had done. I saw it in the way she looked at me with her serious thinking face. We were barely out of our mess, and here I was, rushing the to the gate of matrimony. I had to slow down, take it one day at a time. Lauren was still wary of us, and I was still nervous that I was going to screw something up. Devin had been furious when he received the final decree of marriage dissolution. Effy had to play hard with him, getting him to shut up and leave me alone before his own brewing legal troubles compounded his playboy lifestyle.

I shook my head as I looked down the cobblestone walkway. I need to put the brakes on. My excitement of having Lauren back in the fight was getting ahead of me. I needed to be careful. I had to be careful. I was in love with a multimillionaire who proved she could disappear like a ghost and make it impossible to find her. I couldn't risk losing her a third time. What's that saying? Third time's a charm? I huffed, rolling my eyes at my stupid thoughts.

"You ready?" Lauren's hand fell to the small of my back. Her voice calm and steady. Long gone was the tired rasp of her hangover, replaced by the Lauren I knew. The confident, loving woman who stole my breath away seven years ago as sh stood in front of me, nervous as hell. Cute, but nervous as hell.

I smiled, "Yes." I glanced over the borrowed clothing Lauren gave me before I showered. "It makes me laugh that Gillian and I are the same size up top, but nowhere near close in pant length." I plucked at the gorgeous pale blue top with a high-end designer name in the collar. A designer I knew charged the price of small homes for the thin blouse I was wearing. Rich people confused me, and I had been a semi-rich person.

Lauren smirked. "I could make an inappropriate comment, but I'll save it for later." She nudged me, putting on her sunglasses. "And I told you, Gillian is nine feet tall and nothing but legs."

I stared at the side of Lauren's head, biting my tongue. I wanted to bring up my awkward proposal, and talk it out. Instead, I smiled, took her hand and started walking us forward. "What would that inappropriate comment be? I feel it may be related to breasts. Gillian let it slip on set, breasts are one of your favorite things."

Lauren smiled, shaking her head. "I might have to cut you off from talking to that Irish blabber mouth." She kept her eyes forward as she guided me onto the street, tightly holding on to my hand. "She's going to spill one too many secrets, and I'll have nothing left to surprise you with."

I laughed, leaning into her side. "You will always surprise me, Lauren. You have so far, good and bad." I tilted my head down, wincing at my own words.

Lauren's smile faded as we strolled further down the street towards the hotel. "I promise to keep future bad surprises in the toilet with the wine." She sighed, running her thumb over my knuckles. "Speaking of surprises…"

I cleared my throat, knowing what was coming. My heart shouting to abort immediately! "I heard Roger wants all of the main cast to fly out to California in a couple of weeks when you've finished the film. The studio wants to do a full-blown press junket in the states. Effy said you have a tentative release date?"

Lauren nodded, her face turning serious as she always did when she was in work mode. "Yeah, I think the film will be released by the end of the year. The studio is pushing for a Christmas Day release, line it up in time for the Oscar cut off. I'm not thrilled about it. Roger's email came in while you were in the shower." Lauren paused, her brow furrowing in thought. "I don't know how you're going to work it, Bo. I looked over your shooting schedule, and you'll be knee deep in the waters of Venice, solving a murder."

She glanced at me. "I may use you as an excuse to cancel the whole thing and do phone interviews. I know the press is going to throttle all of us with questions about the set drama. It's the last thing I want to sit for fourteen hours, answering no comment to questions about your ex-husband, Elizabeth, and all that bullshit." Lauren suddenly let go of my hand, jamming hers into the front pocket of her worn jeans.

I reached out, grabbing her elbow, stopping her in the middle of the street. "Lauren, don't."

She frowned. "Don't what?"

"Don't be a jerk. I can see it in your face, and hear it in your tone. Don't let the tabloids, and the arseholes get to you. We're above them, and we're together in this." I stepped closer into her space. "None of them matter to me anymore, only you. You're the only person who matters to me right now, and probably forever. I don't care how selfish that sounds, but it's the truth. " I ran my hand down her arm, before placing both against her chest. The pink tunic she wore was soft against my palms, her body warmth soaking into my skin and distracting for a split second. Focus Bo, stay focused. "My contract has a clause in it that I'm to be scheduled time off to promote your film. I'll be flying out of Venice the night before the press junket, arriving first thing in the morning. I'll be there with you for the junket, and then in California for four days. I want to clean out my old apartment and put my stuff in storage. Effy and Gillian are helping me find a new place to live. Wherever that may be." I looked up, catching Lauren's gaze focused on my necklace, or the large amount of cleavage Gillian's shirt offered.

I gave her a dirty look. "So, behave, or you won't see this anytime soon." I stepped back, buttoning up an extra button, interrupting Lauren's stare. I shivered at memories in England when that stare of hers lead to other things, then tried to shove my libido back in the closet. I craved to touch Lauren, but rushing into bed wasn't the answer. We had to repair our relationship, and therefore I had to leave it to Lauren to dictate the physical side. I didn't feel right making the first move, even though I sort of did when I kissed her. I only kissed Lauren yesterday to get her to shut up, but that only made me want to kiss her more. I clenched my jaw, thinking about kissing her was making me overly flirty, and that was making me overly frustrated. That frustration was adding up, making the French heat worse. I was now sweating.

Lauren's face flushed a lovely shade of red. "I was looking at your necklace. Arseholes? You've been spending too much time with the English." She turned to look back down the street. "I know, Bo. The tabloids are that one thing that always gets my goat. I can't stand the media and their incessant need to be in my life more than my mother." She exhaled, nodding towards the end of the street where Gillian and Effy were walking hand in hand. "There's the wonder twins." Her tone was less than enthused.

I glanced over my shoulder, waving politely at Effy. "You love them both, Lauren. If it wasn't for either of them, I dread to think where we would be right now." I tugged on her elbow, getting her to unfold her arms so I could hold her hand. "However, I am wondering about things. You completely glossed over the fact I threatened to never let you see me topless again."

Lauren allowed our fingers to link together, her jaw tightening as Gillian spotted us and waved like she was royalty. "I'd be having a very intense relationship with wine and the toilet. I'd still have a heavy dislike for Gillian and her fatherly lectures. You'd be in Vancouver filming a really odd superhero film, and no. I didn't gloss over your threat, I was shocked into silence and had to tell my jerk persona to go the hell away before it ruined everything." She tilted her head my way, lifting her sunglasses up so I could see her amber eyes. "Trust me, Bo. I definitely want to see you topless again." She winked at me before settling her sunglasses in place. "But I'm going to wait until you ask me. I can't push since I was the one who walked away from you." Lauren's voice wavered. "One of the stupidest mistakes I've made to date."

I went to say something, sifting through what my libido wanted me to say, and tell her that we were even in the stupid category, but I was cut off by Gillian catcalling us. I smiled, squeezing Lauren's hand as I turned to greet my friend. Things were still very fragile between Lauren and I. I honestly hoped that by the end of these three weeks, we'd find a sort of balance to stand on and move forward. I just wondered where the tipping point was, and if it would come in time.

* * *

XXX

 **Lauren**

"Did you know my love here, solved that panty strangler case?" Gillian sat across from me, holding up a wine glass with elegance as she leaned into Effy. "The incredible detective she is."

I nodded. "Of course, I do, you just told us thirty times over two glasses of wine. Can we not talk about that case again? You were obsessed with all the documentaries about it, and made me watch that horrible Lifetime remake fifty times when we were on location in Georgia." I picked at the salad in front of me. My stomach whining that it wanted the massive steak and potato I ordered. "I'm pretty sure the sound crew wanted to murder you. Always asking them their theories of who did it, and if he lived nearby."

Gillian rolled her eyes. "They didn't. I was fascinated because the killer was born in Atlanta and moved to England in his prime years. I was curious if the swamp water in his blood mixed with the fog of English air. the two combining to create a pervy murderer." She set her glass down, nudging Effy. "Tell her, Lizbet."

Effy gave me a tired look, a look that told us all Gillian had also driven her up the wall with her obsession. "I don't want to, Gilly. I only assisted the lead investigator in filing paperwork, and looking over evidence. Discussing that entire case is not polite table conversation, or any other time conversation." She smiled, looking at Bo. "Anyway, I have a few more emails for you to look at in regards to that junket in the states, Bo, but we can save that for much later." She then glanced between the two of us. "Looks like you two have made up, care to give us the happy details?"

Bo laughed, shaking her head. She sat next to me, poking at her cold pasta salad. "It's only been less than a day. We are starting with our friendship and then go from there." Bo's hand found mine under the table, and grabbed it. "We're fixing the mess, one day at a time."

I took her hand, holding it properly to reassure her. I pushed the wilting salad away and looked to my right, catching a table of four staring our way. I was about to tell Gillian to settle her ass down, when I squinted and recognized a few faces as those of Bo's cast mates. My stomach twisted, I instantly went into protective mode. I turned to let Bo know we had gawkers, when our waitress walked up and blocked my view.

"Can I get anyone a refill?" The girl's thick English accent had her coming back to the table often, discovering with glee Effy was also English. I had the distinct feeling, after she grabbed my shoulder, that she discovered me. She smile turned flirty each time she interacted with me, it wasn't because I was famous. There was another agenda on her plate, and it wasn't an autograph. It did make me wonder how many times could a person wink before they developed a tick?

Gillian asked for another wine, Effy and Bo asked for more water, and I just shook my head. This time the waitress winked slowly at me, patted my shoulder, and sashayed to the bar to fill the girl's drinks. The girl was cute, very, very young, but that's where it ended with me. There was only one girl on my mind, and she was sitting next to me. Fidgeting with her food and oozing nerves. But when I turned to ask Bo about her cast mates, she was glaring at me. Her brown eyes radiating jealousy. It was something new to see from Bo, and it sent shivers through my body. I swallowed, and asked her quietly. "Are you okay?"

Bo gave me a taut smile. "Mhm. You good? Or do you want another refill?" She spoke quietly, trying to avoid the wonder twins from eavesdropping. It didn't matter as Gillian was loudly ranting about the weather. Effy sat eating bread, sliding Gillian's wine glass further out of her reach, smiling and nodding at her girlfriend.

"No. I've barely touched my water." I leaned closer. "Are you upset?"

Bo's jaw twitched, her eyes quickly moving from mine, a huge fake smile crossing her face. "Hi Ashley, how are you?"

I spun in my seat, three sets of eyes all directed towards the young woman standing at the edge of my table. She had a shitty grin on her face. "Hey Bo, I thought that was you. Robbie kept telling me it wasn't you, so I bet him a beer. Looks like I won." This Ashley ran her eyes over me. "Aren't you Lauren Lewis?" She smirked at Bo. "I didn't know you two were really close friends, Bo. You said you were co-workers, but I think you're closer than that."

I instantly felt all my walls slide around me, falling into protective press mode. "Yes, and who might you be?" I wanted so desperately to launch into this girl, but that would be a jerky Lauren reaction. I had to stay calm, for Bo.

She stuck her hand out in a defiant manner. "Ashley Kingston. I'm Bo's costar."

I frowned, reluctantly taking her hand. "Nice to meet you." I threw a look at Gillian, a silent one, begging for her to step in and save all of us. Gillian winked, standing up from the table and sticking her hand out equally as defiant towards our lunch intruder.

"Gillian Harris. Great to make a fellow actors acquaintance." She grinned, her green eyes sparkling with mischief. "Ashley Kingston? I can't recall if I've ever heard your name before. Are you a newcomer?"

Effy sighed, pouring Gillian's wine into a plant, refilling the glass with water. She shook her head and let her girlfriend go. I wanted to laugh, but kept my composure, waiting for the show to begin.

Ashley cleared her throat, suddenly very awkward about standing in front of Gillian. "Um, I've been in the business for about five years. This is my sixth film." She turned to Bo, hoping Bo would save her.

But Bo was sitting back, like the rest of us, waiting and watching. Gillian made a face like she just sucked on a lemon. "Hmm. Well, then. What films have you been in?" She waved at the empty chair at the end of the table. "Would you like to have a seat? My girlfriend and our good friends were having lunch. Talking shop, getting caught up, and whatnot." She tapped the top of the chair. "I'm sure you'd love to ask a million questions about what you think you know about our last film. Root around in my best friend Lauren's business, inquire why Bo and her are such good friends. Good close friends. Alas, you see, it's none of your business. We all worked on an incredible film and along the way true love was found. A true love that I'm very tired of idiots like you mucking with. " She waved a perfectly manicured hand near the girls face. "I can see it in your rosy cheeks, you're dying to ask the naughty questions." She sat down, throwing an arm around Effy. "We have calamari on the way, plenty to share."

Ashley turned a shade of white I'd never seen before. "Uh, thank you, but um." She looked over at her friends, staring with wide eyes. "I should get back to my friends.

Gillian laughed, reaching for her glass. "Sounds like it. Do be a dear girl, and piss off. Oh, and if you tell the tabloids about me telling you to piss off, I have the best detective and legal team in my corner." She pointed right at Ashley. "You need to work on your acting. Your face telegraphed completely that you were sent over here on a snooping sneak mission." She then flicked her wrist as Ashley mumbled to Bo, telling her she'd see her on set.

I let out a huge breath when the girl was gone, leaning against the table. "Holy shit, Gillian." I was nervous, but invigorated. Finally in this life, someone had the audacity to tell snooping sneaks like Ashley, to leave me the hell alone. Gillian had never stood up for me like this, it clearly meant she was head over heels in love with Effy. Love infecting her being, making her want to protect my heart that had also finally found a true love.

She winked at me, taking a huge sip of water. She cringed at the tasteless liquid, and gave Effy an angry look. "We talked about this." She tossed the water over her shoulder.

Effy gave her a hardened look back, a look I knew melted the hardest criminals into tears. "And we talked about that."

The two women stared at each other, until Gillian broke first, kissing Effy. "You win. I love you too much to argue."

Effy's eyes grew to the size of small moons. "What…what did you just say?"

Gillian leaned back, shifting in her chair to face Effy. "I said, I love you. I love you, my dear Lizbet. I realized it a few days ago, and had a grand beach side walk planned to spill the beans." She looked my way. "But then I got riled up by Assley, and that I wished my best friend to have the freedom to love openly without noses poking in. I had to say it." She grinned my way. "Maybe Lauren will follow my lead." Gillian turned to Effy, kissing her soundly as Effy melted into her arms, whispering like a little girl that she loved Gillian too.

I looked way, grinning. "Well, I um." I went to comment, when the waitress returned, setting fresh drinks down. She set a whiskey and cola in front of me, leaning down to whisper in my ear. "This is on me, and if you're interested you can have me on you later." Her breath prickled my skin, she was that close.

I shook my head, pushing the drink away, stammering around something to say. I went to politely, and firmly say no thank you ever, when Bo startled me. She quickly stood up from her seat, her chair screeching against the terra cotta tile, throwing her napkin on the table. "I'm going for a walk."

She rushed off before I could do a damn thing. Gillian made a noise, snapping her fingers at the waitress. "You, bring me the bill, then bring me the manager. I have a complaint that I hope turns into your termination." The waitress scampered off.

Gillian turned my way, giving me that one look. Her, I'm about to start a lecture look. I shook my head. "Don't. I know." I pushed my chair back, and caught the back of Bo as she jogged down to the beach. "I know."

I barely heard Gillian yell at me not to muck it up, I flipped her off and ran after Bo.

Bo was at the edge of the water when I caught up to her. I wrapped my hand around her bicep. "Bo, you shouldn't be jealous…please don't be jealous."

Bo refused to look at me, her cheeks wet from tears. She wiped her face, still staring at the ocean. "I am jealous. I'm ridiculously jealous, that I want to go back to that girl and punch her in the stomach." She peered at me, shaking her head. "The audacity. Hitting on you, flirting with you in front of me."

I moved closer. "Bo, it wasn't anything. I was being careful. I know this sounds shitty, but this happens a lot. Usually because they see a pay day one way or another when I sit at their table." I reached to pull her closer, but she pulled away.

"It's not that, Lauren. People flirt with celebrities, I also went down that road." She turned to face me, her brown eyes burning with an intense flame. "It's that I have to sit there and be silent. Sit and be silent as random idiots hit on my girl. The woman I love, and I can't say shit. Why? Because I still have no idea where we stand in the public." She cleared her throat as more tears fell. "I'm jealous when anyone looks at you like that waitress did. I saw it when Ashley came over. You're beautiful, Lauren, but god dammit, you're mine. I want to be able to tell the world, all the skeevy waitresses in the world, that the need to back off. You're mine, but I can't say a damn thing."

She looked up at the sun, laughing sarcastically. "Have you met jerky Bo? Well, here she is. Being a jerk, but so desperately wanting to stake my claim on you. I want the whole god damn world to know, but I can't. I can't because of this stupid business we're in. Everything has to be a secret, in the shadows, or I have to be an untouchable superstar like Gillian to live." She dropped her head down, heaving a huge sigh. Bo was pissed, angry, infuriated, and all I could think was how cute she was. And how incredible it felt to have someone this passionate about me.

I did the only thing I could think of, the opposite of what the old me would do. I grabbed Bo, spun her around to face me. Then placed both of my hands on her face and kissed her like I had been craving too since I woke up with her shivering next to me in bed. I felt Bo resist for a second, until I pulled her closer, running my tongue across her bottom lip. It was the one thing that melted her will, and it did the trick. Bo started kissing back with intensity, her hands finding my hips. I smiled against her mouth, knowing that this wasn't the complete fix, but it was sealing up one of our many cracks. I leaned back, breaking off the kiss and licked my lips, grinning at Bo. "I'm yours, Bo. Claim me all you want." I reached up, thumbing away the last of her tears. "I've been an untouchable superstar longer than Gillian. I've just never found anyone I've wanted to stand in the spotlight with. Until you."

Bo swallowed hard, she was flushed and struggling to not attack me. I had seen her like this a handful of times. A handful of times that led to incredible nights in bed, but I didn't want that right now. I wanted to win Bo over thoroughly before I gave her an incredible night. She looked at me with pure love, running her hand over the necklace. "Are you sure?"

I nodded. "Very sure." I turned to motion at Ashley standing off in the near distance. "Your costar is going to make sure I stay sure. Let's beat her, shall we?"

Bo spun her head around, catching Ashley running off with what she thought was a million-dollar headline. "Oh shit, Lauren. I can go talk to her."

I shook my head. "How about we go talk to your PR manager and have her draft up a press release, then we can have the Irish spitfire leak it to her sources." I pressed a hand against Bo's cheek, drawing her attention back to me. "Then how about we find that waitress, and I'll let you tell her that you didn't appreciate her hitting on your girlfriend in front of you. It ruined your appetite."

Bo's face exploded into an epic grin. "Girlfriend?"

"Yes, girlfriend. I thought we should take that step before you move onto fiancée." I laughed as Bo's grin turned panicked. "I heard everything. I don't fall asleep at the drop of a hat like you do. You need to at least wait for three snores before you talk to me in my sleep." I kissed her again, loving the adorable look plastered on her face, and took her hand in mine. "Let's go back to the wonder twins and tell them the news. Get Gillian to take us to that mom and pop restaurant down the street. They have the best veal parmesan."

Bo whispered an okay, clutching to my hand as we walked back up to the hotel restaurant. I had no clue what was waiting for me in the morning with the press. It wouldn't be great, it wouldn't be good, but with Bo next to me, it would be doable. If it got really bad, I'd just send her in and let her stomach punch away in my honor.


	20. Chapter 20

**N: short one. Go and enjoy, and to some, no i don't repost to get more comments, reviews. I repost because i fix minor mistakes, and edit and want to put out a better product. It's called caring about my work. With that, the rest of you enjoy this mess.**

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"And this is home, for now." Bo held the door to her French villa open.

I leaned in the doorway, squinting. "It's rather tiny." I pretended to criticize every inch of the very quaint, and cozy, villa. "There's no marble in sight."

I heard Bo blow out a steady breath. "There's some in the kitchen." She walked in, dropping her purse on the floor. She reached for the small bag I'd packed when we stopped by my house to pick up a few things. We both decided to I would spend the night at Bo's since it was closer to the editing studio, and a little further off the beaten path. The villa was smaller than mine, but it was right on the hill in front of the ocean. "We can always go back to your house, if the lack of marble bothers you."

I gravitated towards the ocean air sifting in from the far window. "I'll manage. I think I saw a marble cutting board in your kitchen." I smiled at the sound of Bo's delicate grumbling. I kept on, passing through a small sitting room, landing in the large living area that faced the picture window where the ocean was painted in front of me. "You have a better view than I." I was enjoying the ease Bo and I had found again. We're recovering faster than I expected, but that was when jerk Lauren was in control. Jerk Lauren had gone into the plant with Gillian's wine, never to return, and I was feeling the immediate effect of just letting go and loving Bo.

I felt two arms slide around my waist, Bo's hands resting against my stomach. "I certainly do."

I smiled, covering her hands with mine. "What shall we do for the rest of the day? We've eaten enough food to carry us through lunch tomorrow. We've walked the town, and the wonder twins have holed up in their room until god knows when." I leaned into Bo. It was just barely past four in the afternoon, and I had no idea what to do in this town. I only came here to work, or relax in my marble sanctuary. "Remind me to call Effy later to go over the press release. I think by then, those two will have to come up for air." I sighed, the press release was making me a tiny bit nervous. It would be the first time I was making a statement about my personal life, and the million different possible outcomes scared the piss out of me.

"We can talk. We can sit in the sun. We can go swimming, or we can take my rental car to a vineyard?" Bo pressed a kiss against my shoulder. "But that would take us late into the night, and you have meet with the editor very early in the morning." She held me tight. "We have one more night of this privacy, might as well enjoy it as best as we can. Effy was expecting the crap to hit the fan by first light tomorrow morning."

I sighed, closing my eyes. I had forgotten about work, a rarity in my life, but it reared its head when I received a message from the editor. I had to go in first thing to work on the last half of the cuts. I wanted to skip it and stay with Bo. We were starting to find a good place, and I wanted to stay in it before the press came knocking. "I can skip. I'm the director. I can do whatever I want." I turned in Bo's arms, reaching up to cradle her face. "What if we took a trip to the private beach right outside your door. Swim in the ocean like teenagers, then have a light dinner and do our usual." I hated the ocean, but I had no other idea what to in a paradise with an ocean. I was rambling out ideas.

Bo cocked an eyebrow. "Our usual?" A small smirk started to creep across her face. "I vaguely remember what the usual was, and it was pretty sweaty."

I gave Bo a pointed look. "Not that usual, the other usual. The one where we cuddle like baby kittens and watch a cheesy movie. You fall asleep in my arms, and I stare at you wondering how a girl so beautiful could sound like a lumber saw as she slept." I chuckled at Bo's frown, kissing her swiftly to silence her retort. "Is this agreeable with you, my love?"

Bo rolled her eyes, pinching my side before she stepped out of my arms. "I'm going to record you while you sleep. You talk and snore in your sleep, and some of the things you say…" She turned away, walking towards the kitchen, opening the fridge for water. "Yes, all of that sounds agreeable." She pointed a finger my way. "I get to pick the movie again."

I held my hands in defeat. "Yes ma'am." I went to follow her when I spotted a picture on the fridge door. I plucked it off the door, holding it in both hands. It was a picture of Bo and I on location in the muck of Scotland. She was grinning in full makeup and wardrobe. I had my hands in the air, grinning as I went over the next scene she was about to shoot, rambling like the nerd I was. I vividly remembered that day. It was the day Bo approached me in the barn and told me what her feelings were, and that our past never left us.

"Alan gave me that. I've kept it with me every day since he gave it to me. I know you're not smiling at me in the picture. You're rambling about scene set ups, dialogue, and what tone you wanted me to have." Bo stood in front of me, looking down at the picture. "I'm smiling because it was my absolute favorite to watch you rant about your work. You were utterly stunning in this moment, and to be honest, I didn't hear a damn thing you were telling me." She looked up into my eyes.

"Stunning? I'm wearing three coats, knee high rain boots, and was covered in mud." I ran my fingers over the photograph. "I do remember you taking my breath away when you walked up in full costume." I shook my head. "I should've known then it was hopeless to keep fighting you." I handed Bo the photograph.

She glanced at it. "You did snap at me three hours later for screwing up my lines. That was the breaking point, and Gillian telling me about the Spielberg audition. Hence, why I charged you in the barn and let it out." She let out a slow breath. "I really truly thought you hated me, Lauren." Her tone shifted to sadness. I had treated her poorly and wanted to prove to her that I never hated her, I just hated myself for not being able to have her like I did now.

I frowned, watching Bo turn to the fridge and set the photograph back in its place. I crossed my arms, thinking. "Can you bring me my notebook? The one I jammed in the top of the bag?"

Bo nodded, and left down a hallway. "Sure." She smiled softly. "I'll be right back."

When she was gone, I moved back to the window. The ocean air was intoxicating and I was drawn to the way it made me relax. I stood, thinking on what more I could do for Bo. It was time I romanced her like she deserved. Now that I'd thrown away the fear of our relationship becoming public, I had to give her the world.

Bo appeared next to me, handing over my notebook. "Here. Did you want to work a little before we go to the beach?"

I shook my head, flipping through the notebook to the back where it was crammed with notes, bits of paper, and other random things I kept as inspiration. "I want to show you something." I flipped until I found it. I removed the wrinkled sheet of paper with a photograph tucked in the middle. "I know you've heard the rumors about your audition, and how I fudged it for you." I unfolded the paper, holding it out to Bo. "This is the email I sent to Steven when he asked me to pick my top five." I leaned over, tapping the edge with my finger. "You're number three."

Bo read over the page. Her eyes darting along the small paragraph I wrote on each of my choices, my reasoning why I selected them. She blinked a few times, her eyes watering. "Lauren…"

"Bo Dennis is my third choice. Granted she has some rough edges leftover from working on a television show, but the talent, the passion, and the drive is there. She would be perfect for the role, as she has the desire to be an actor, not a movie star. I'm confident with some coaching, she would bring a new depth to the character Aurora. Bo Dennis is a raw, magnetic talent, and deserves a second chance." I stared at Bo as I spoke out loud the exact same words I had written all those years ago. When Bo looked up, I shrugged. "He went with number five, he liked the way she brought an edge to the character." I chuckled. "And we all know how that worked out for her." Number five was incredible in her audition, but bombed hard on film. Steven told me it was the worst casting he had ever done in his career at last year's Oscar's. The film was a box office flop, and was panned by critics. He and I had a good laugh about it over a glass of champagne. "Last I heard, number five had become a real estate agent in Topanga."

Bo smiled sheepishly, clutching the paper. "Can I keep this? I mean, I always wondered why I didn't get that role." She blinked back tears. "I never wanted to think it was you, even when the gossip and rumors came from credible sources."

I rolled my eyes. "The only credible sources in your life as a movie star, are your parents, the wonder twins, and your gut feeling." I turned back to the notebook. "You can keep that. I've carried it with me, hoping I could one day give it to you when I stopped being so angry." I chuckled. "Who knew I would be giving it to you as a token of my love." I flipped pages until I found the worn photograph, and held it up to show Bo. "Alan is a camera bug. He's taken god knows how many pictures on this last film. Many I'm using for the promotional work, but this one, this one I stole from him two weeks into production. Shoved it in my notebook like the silly girl I am."

The photograph was of Bo, standing on a hill while we were on a location scouting trip with the cast. It was taken on a small cliff near the farm I eventually chose. Bo standing on the edge as she gazed out onto the ocean in the horizon. She was wearing one of Gillian's pea coats, huddled up from the biting cold, but with a grin on her face. She was gorgeous, and looked happy. Happy, excited and the second I saw it, my heart skipped three times. "I stole the picture like the nerd I am, because you made my heart skip and I instantly thought of the first time we met. My heart only skipped twice that time, but it was invigorating."

I set the photograph back in the notebook. "I would sneak a look at this every time I wanted to give up on you. Whatever reason it was that day, I would look at this. It would recharge me and give me strength. Granted, I should've owned up to what I felt for you then, but I was a chicken." I closed the notebook on the photograph. "I know better now, Bo. I love you and every time I look at that picture, or you, I feel like I can take on the world."

I lifted my head up, setting the notebook on the counter next to me. "My only regret is that I failed to listen to my grandparents when they whispered in my head the first time you sat in my living room. Auditioning for me." I smiled at the memory of that very awkward life moment. It was the exact moment I fell head over heels for the woman staring at me.

Bo grinned, her eyes still watery. "You have a strange romantic way about you, Lauren." She sniffled, and pulled her hands from behind her back. She held a decent sized box in her hands. "Gillian said you are a mix of old fashioned, and extremely awkward, but that when you romance me, I need to understand it's from the heart." She held out the box. "I've been holding onto this since I got to France. I was going to mail it to Roger when we couldn't find you. Then Effy located you, and I held onto it. Hoping I could give it to you in person."

I gave Bo a strange look, she was rambling like she did when she was nervous. "You're nervous." I took the box. "Please don't tell me this is a ring…we still have a few weeks before we reach our deadline."

Bo shook her head. "No, no. It's not a ring. I can't afford the ring I'd buy you, maybe after this movie." She waved her hands for me to open, before clutching the cameo around her neck. "I wanted to get you something after you got me the necklace. Something that wasn't a pewter beer mug with a boy on it."

I chuckled. "But I love that mug, it holds the perfect amount of cherry coke for conference calls." I slipped a finger under the edge of the blue paper wrapped around the box. "And what kind of ring are you looking at? I don't need huge diamonds, or jewels. You could give me a ring made from gum wrappers and I'd be okay." I sighed internally. Stop jumping the shark, Lauren. You and Bo are barely five hours into the legitimate relationship, no need to turn the eleventh hour into a marriage.

I removed the rest of the paper, lifting the lid off the plain white box. What I saw inside had me gasping, tears rushing to my eyes. "Bo."

She nervously played with her hands. "Gillian helped. We found it in your box of junk in the spare bedroom. Effy called your mom to ask about the photograph inside, and then I had it restored at the jeweler next to the place where I got your mug. I know I was snooping, but it's incredible. The story behind it and I wanted you to have something like my necklace." She bit her bottom lip.

I lifted out the gold and ivory pendant on a thin gold chain, now gleaming from being restored and cleaned. I hadn't seen it in years since my grandmother gave it to me a year before she passed away. She handed it down to me since I was her favorite and wanted me to have it. I only remember packing it away in a box in my mom's basement. I ran my fingers over the US Army eagle embossed on it. "My grandfather bought this for her in Hawaii before he shipped out to the Pacific. It cost him three weeks of pay, but he didn't care. He had already fallen hopelessly in love with her, and wanted her to have something." I fought tears as I flicked open the locket. A picture of my grandparents sat on one side, both smiling on their wedding day. On the opposite side was a picture of Bo and I on set from a week before everything fell apart. It was another picture Alan had taken of us, but I never got to see.

Bo leaned over still nervously biting her lip. "I hope you're okay with me fixing it up. It was your grandparents who brought us together, I thought it was fitting." She shrugged. "I almost went with the elephant statue I bought last week, but after what you just told me. I know. I know you're my forever, Lauren and I wanted to show you how much I mean it. How much I love you, and our story."

I nodded, a tear rolling down my cheek as I rasped out. "It's perfect, Bo." I set the pendant back in the box, and reached for Bo. I pulled her towards me, kissing her deeply as I grinned. My heart skipping four times at the gesture. I parted from her, licking my lips as I rested my forehead against hers. "You're outshining me. I'm the one who needs to woo your pants off." I pushed the box into her hand. "Will you do the honors?"

Bo grinned, kissing me soundly before lifting the pendant out and reaching over to put it on me. When she was done, she smiled at the joy on my face. "Is it cheesy that we sort of have matching necklaces now?"

I shook my head, looking down at the pendant, running my fingers over it. I could feel the love radiate through it. "It is, but I'm rather cheesy." I looked up, locking on Bo's bright brown eyes. "My grandparents would have liked you. They would've given me a grand talking to about how I've treated you, but they would've loved you." I held my hand out to her. "Anyone ever tell you how incredible you are, Bo? For putting up with me and being snoopy?"

Bo laughed, taking my hand. "No one until you. However, your mother is extremely curious to meet me when we're in the states. She wants to meet the mystery woman who has turned her daughter into a living human, and not a machine who lives to work." Bo winked. "Her words exactly. She also said to call her when you were done sulking like you did when you were five and lost your plastic bag puppet out the car window."

I closed my eyes groaning. "It wasn't a plastic bag. It was a foam mitt and I loved it. I just didn't have a clue that sticking things out a car window at sixty miles an hour, tends to rip things off little kid's hands." I frowned. "Thanks for reminding me. I'm still upset about that."

Bo cocked an eyebrow, resting my hand on her hip as she slipped her arms around my waist. "I think I have a cure for that frown."

I shook my head. "Nothing can fix that traumatic event on a Pennsylvania highway."

Bo chuckled. "Really? Not even these four little words?" She leaned closer, her lips brushing across mine. "Me in a bikini."

I swallowed hard, a shiver running through my body at the idea of Bo on the beach in a red bikini. I felt my entire body heat up. "Please tell me it's red." I didn't know how to swim, but the idea of Bo in a bikini, I'd drown happily.

Bo leaned back, smirking as she took my hand. "It is indeed." She let go of my hand as she sauntered towards her bedroom. "Looks like you're starting to forget about Muffles the muffin."

I walked after Bo, the sway of her hips egging me on. "Muffles who?" I watched her disappear into the room, the door closing behind her. I would wait patiently as she changed, but deep down I knew it was going to be a short trip to the beach. If we even made it there at all.


	21. Chapter 21

N: i haven't much to say, so read on and enjoy!

* * *

 **Bo**

The water was perfect. It was refreshing and a departure from the heat of the sand. I stood waist deep in the deep blue water, looking out at the endless ocean. I grinned, tilting my head up towards the sun. I felt good, relieved and hopeful for the coming days. I knew there was some work left to do with Lauren and I, but I was content. I opened my eyes, running my hands through the water and looking over my shoulder. Lauren sat under an umbrella back on the beach. Her eyes only on me, and I could feel them run over my body. Lauren hadn't been able to stop staring from the moment I walked out of my room in the very small red bikini. She made a few awkward sounds, and followed me down to the beach like a love struck puppy. I only got her as far as the beach, her strange fear of the ocean keeping her on land.

I giggled, waving at my girlfriend. She waved clumsily back, looking down at her notebook. I sighed, giving in and wading back to her. When I was back on the beach, I sat on the edge of the chair next to Lauren. "You could take off the shirt, it's a beach you know. Let some of your pale skin see the sun again." I plucked at the oversize shirt Lauren threw on over the swimsuit I let her borrow.

Lauren shook her head vehemently. "I'm okay. I burn easily. It's genetics. I come from a pale family." She pushed her sunglasses to the top of her head. Her eyes immediately running over my body in a way that had me trembling. "Plus, the ocean…" she motioned to the water.

"Is harmless." I pulled at the hem of her shirt. "Come on, I want you to swim with me at least once." I waved around the beach. "There's not a soul here. My neighbors are older and never come out this late in the afternoon. No one will see you. Just me." I lifted her shirt, catching the edge of orange bikini bottom. "Please?"

I leaned over, kissing her on the cheek. "Swim with me, or tell me about Muffles."

Lauren frowned, closing her notebook and setting it on edge of the chair. "Muffles was a fast food chain mascot. A big muffin shaped character that looked like a grizzle bear, but cuter." She leaned back, smirking as she continued. "He was my favorite character, and the foam puppet…"

I groaned, grabbing her hand and lifting her from the chair. "Lauren! Swim with me." I pulled her shirt over her head, getting her arms tangled up. When I got a look at Lauren in my borrowed orange bikini, I had to step away. "Jesus on a bicycle, you're hot." She was. I'd seen Lauren bundled up, wear baggy jeans and shirts, I've even seen her naked, but this. This was a sight to behold. I'd never really seen Lauren in bright sunlight. Just in the dim light of her bedroom, or the steamy clouds of a shower. She was a work of art. I reached out, running my hands across her stomach, smiling as she gasped. "Why do you hide this under ratty old clothes? Those big old concert t-shirts do you no justice, you're incredible to look at Lauren."

Lauren wiggled out of the shirt, dropping it onto the chair, and immediately covered her chest with her arms. "I'm lazy? I don't like people looking at me?" she glanced down at herself. "This thing is big on me." She swallowed hard, avoiding my eyes and fidgeting with the bikini top. "I keep having to tie these tighter or my boobs will fall out."

I licked my lips, going slow was going to be impossible if I kept staring at Lauren, thinking about if her boobs did fall out. I took her hand, dragging her behind me.

"Bo? Wait!" She skipped behind me. "I can't swim!"

I shook my head. "Nope, we need to get into the water to cool down before I attack you." I squinted at the water ahead of us. "I need to cool down. I have a super hot girlfriend and we've promised each other to go slow. So, we swim to take my mind off the things I want to do you while you wear that thing."

I didn't let go of her hand until I drug her waist deep into the water. The chill of the ocean slaking off some of my body heat. I took a quick dip, submerging myself in the water before popping up right in front of Lauren. She looked at me tentatively. "You know I can't swim." She was cute, standing there with her hair up, looking everywhere for something to cover her body with.

I nodded. "I know, but I can. You'll be safe with me." I took her hand, pulling her a few more steps into the water. The water now reaching just under her breasts.

"You told me you couldn't swim." Lauren frowned, clutching to my hand like it was a lifesaver.

I grinned, biting my bottom lip at how irresistible Lauren was. Vulnerable, sexy, and it was making things very difficult for me. "I lied. I didn't want to chase after you if you jumped into the pool." I moved my hands, running them over her arms, my eyes taking their own journey along her body. "Relax, Lauren. Enjoy the water."

Lauren huffed. "Bo, I'm mildly afraid of large bodies of water." She looked at me sheepishly. "What if there's sharks? What if there's little fish that like to chew on human skin?" She fidgeted with her hands above the water.

I wanted to crack a joke, but held back. This Lauren in front of me, was the true Lauren. The scared girl from Boston, who apparently had a fear of tiny fish, but this was her. She had finally trusted me enough to brave enough to follow me into the water, and stand with me. It made me fall even deeper in love with her. I seized fidgety hands, and pulled them to rest on my sides. I leaned forward, tenderly kissing her. "I guess I have to distract you then." I made the decision in that instant, screw waiting. That, and her in a bikini was driving me over the edge.

Lauren gave me a confused look, opening her mouth to ask what I was intending to do, when I kissed her again. This time harder than the last. I was throwing caution out the window. I couldn't care about going slow with Lauren right now, I had to show her how much I loved every side of her. Lauren returned the kiss, squeezing my sides as she pressed our bodies together. I grinned against her mouth, my hand moving down her arm, under the water and across her stomach.

Lauren whispered out a delicate moan the second she felt my fingers graze along the edge of her bikini bottom. "Bo, what are you doing?" Her voice shook with a mix of desire and fear.

I nipped at her bottom lip. "Let me." I looked up in her eyes, she nodded slowly, I leaned forward capturing her mouth and kissing her with my entire being. As she opened her mouth to give me more, I pushed my hand past the thin material, running my fingers along the length of Lauren. I gasped when she bit my bottom lip, opening her legs wider for me. I couldn't hold back, sliding my fingers easily into her. I went slow, wanting to make this moment last. I wanted to make love to Lauren standing in the middle of the ocean. Lauren kissed me until the rhythm of my fingers made it hard for her to breath and kiss me at the same time. She broke away, pressing her cheek against mine, breathing heavily against my ear. I wrapped my free arm around her, supporting her as I increased the pace, feeling her hips match me. I soon felt her body tighten around my fingers, Lauren's hands clawing at my back as she whispered soft pleas to give her what she needed. I kissed the side of her neck before I moved my fingers at an angle, hitting the one spot that always unraveled the blonde. Lauren cried out, burying her face into my neck as she came against my hand. I held onto her, slowly removing my hand so I could wrap both arms around her. I felt her heart pounding like a jackhammer against mine, making me grin like an idiot that I was the one who made it do that.

We stood in silence in each other's arms, nothing but the sound of the water around us mixing with heartbeats racing from being completely in love with one another. I could've stayed that way forever, but after a few moments, Lauren leaned back. Her eyes were hazy, but there was a glint of payback washing over them. Her cheeks were flushed from her orgasm, or embarrassment, I couldn't tell which one. I was hoping it was the former.

"That wasn't fair. Distracting me like that." Lauren's voice was hoarse as she looked at my lips. I saw that she was definitely already planning revenge.

I shrugged, running my hands to the strings of her bikini top. "It wasn't, but you forgot about sharks, and scary little fish, didn't you?"

Lauren glared at me, reaching back to slap my hands from tugging those strings loose. "Still not fair." She stepped back, snagging my arm to keep her balance. "I can barely walk because of you."

I chuckled, lifting her hand up, pressing a kiss to her knuckles. "I'll take that as a compliment." I waded closer, placing my hand on the side of her face. "I love you, and I couldn't waste another minute not showing you, Lauren." I ran my thumb across her cheek. "Showing you that the girl from Boston will forever have my heart." I smiled as Lauren covered my hand with hers.

"I love you too." She sighed, looking up at me. "Now can we go back to the beach? Collect our things and head home?" She glanced at the water. "I felt a fish mouth on my ankle."

I laughed, linking my arm in hers as I guided her back to the beach. "Yes, we can. I still don't think there are any tiny ankle biting fish in the ocean."

Lauren leaned into me, her hand slipping down my back and past my bikini bottoms to squeeze my ass. "There probably isn't, but I'm not one to wait around on revenge." She leaned over, nipping at the skin under my ear as she whispered. "And I have quite a bit planned for you. Things better left for behind closed doors."

I literally gulped when she moved away, her hand squeezing once more before she completely left me standing in knee high water. Lauren smirked, looking back. "Coming?"

I broke out into a sprint towards the blonde, whispering in the ocean air. "Not yet."

* * *

XXXX

Lauren

Bo sat behind me, her legs wrapped around mine, a blanket covering the both of us as we sat in front of her large open window in the living room. The sun was starting to set, and we both had our physical reunion broken up by rumbling tummy's. It seems we had burned through the heavy pasta lunch we had, and now needed to refuel. I leaned back in Bo's arms, holding up the bowl of fruit and cheese she found in her fridge. "I like that you remember to grocery shop." I tossed a grape into my mouth, offering one to her.

Bo bent down, taking the grape from my fingers with her mouth, kissing the tips before snuggling deeper into me. I sighed at the warmth of her body as the cool air drifted around us. "I like eating, Lauren. Even if I had a staff like you do, I'd do my own grocery shopping." She kissed the side of my head. "If we have more makeup sex like we just did, I'm going to have to have a constant supply of food on hand. You're insatiable."

I laughed, biting into a piece of cheese. "It wasn't all just sex, we made love a few times." I held up a finger to make my point. "You started the war, I just won a few battles." I looked back at her. "Love is a battlefield."

Bo gave me a dirty look. "Quoting eighties nostalgia?" She reached in front of me, picking up a large strawberry. "And it's never just sex with you, Lauren. It's so much more." She ran her hand down my arm, finding my hand. "Never has been, never will be." She shifted so she was facing me. "Do you know how badly I want to quit the film and ask you to run away with me? Even if it was running back to the Midwest, and going back to being a teacher while you sat and wrote in our quiet little house on the hill?" Bo focused on my left hand, running her thumb back and forth over the skin.

"Why would you run from this great opportunity? Your dream?" I covered our hands with mine. "If you want to quit, you can. I'll be there and we can go anywhere in the world. I have the resources and the means."

Bo shook her head. "It's not about money, Lauren. After your film and this one, I have plenty to retire off of." She met my eyes. "It's about us. I'm scared what's waiting for us in the morning. The press, the industry, and all that comes with being an actor." She scooted closer to me, the blanket slipping down her shoulder. "Yes, this is my dream, to be a serious actor." She paused searching my gaze. "But you're my biggest dream come true, and I don't ever want to lose you again."

I furrowed my brow. "You won't, Bo. I've learned my lesson and I don't think there's anything left that could push us apart." I held up my hand, climbing to my feet and rushed to my bag. I snatched up my phone and came back to Bo swathed in the blanket. I went to crawl in with her, and she smirked, shaking her head. "I like this view better."

I groaned, rolling my eyes before grabbing a pillow to cover some of my nakedness. "Don't make me do that one thing I did that made you beg." I laughed, watching Bo's face turn bright red, and dropped my phone in her lap.

"That wasn't begging…" She swallowed hard, picking up my phone to read the email I pulled up.

"It was begging, Bo, but potatoe potato." I waved at the phone. "Read that. It's the statement Effy drafted. I'm willing to release it tonight if you approve. I'm willing to announce to the world that you're mine and I'm yours. Nothing will break us apart now."

Bo looked at me cautiously before reading the email. I picked up the bowl of fruit and continued to eat more, I was starving and wanted pizza. "Is there anywhere around this town that will deliver a pizza? I'm starving."

Bo sat silently, reading. I ignored her, looking for the chunk of Gouda I saw earlier.

 _"Lauren Lewis would like for the press, all media outlets, the studios, and anyone interested that she is in a committed relationship with Bo Dennis. The two developed a friendship on the set of Ms. Lewis's new film, which quickly developed into a romance. To quote Ms. Lewis, "I'm the happiest I've ever been in my life, and as I normally don't embrace a public life in regards to my privacy, Bo is worth coming to the world and telling them that she is the love of my life. A woman who I've loved for a very long time, and will for the rest of my life." Ms. Lewis and Ms. Dennis are releasing this statement and asking the media and public to be respectful of their privacy and be tasteful when approaching them. This is also not a studio stunt to garner more interest in the film, nor is it a tabloid stunt to counter act the negative press from the production. Ms. Lewis and Ms. Dennis will field appropriate questions during interviews, anything brash, rude, crass, or intrusive will cause all involved to be blacklisted from all future studio press junkets."_

Bo set my phone down, her eyes watery as she smiled at me. "You're really doing this? We're really doing this?"

I nodded, chewing on the Gouda. "I am. We are. I wasn't lying when I dictated that to Effy an hour ago while you were passed out on my chest." I set the bowl of fruit down, crawling over to Bo to deeply kiss her. "Do you want to do this? If not, we can creep around in the shadows and play the best friend card."

Bo's hand fell to the back of my neck, holding me in place. "Let's do this. I'm ready. I'm scared, but I'm ready." She kissed me back.

I grinned. "Then text Effy the eagle has left the nest. Gillian will take care of who gets the statement." I watched as Bo scrambled to text Effy, showing me as she hit send. I took the phone from her, throwing it on the couch behind us. "Now, how about that pizza?"

Bo pulled me to lay on top of her. "I had Effy order it for us while I read the statement, it'll be here in twenty minutes. Gives us plenty of time to work up a bigger appetite."

I murmured against Bo's lips as her hand cupped my breasts. "Thank god for assistants."

* * *

I hated leaving Bo in bed, passed out to the world clutching to my pillow like it was me, but I had to. I had to head to the editing studio and get the film done. I wanted to be done with it, release it to the world and see the reaction to my heart's work.

I stood in the doorway to Bo's room, staring at her for a minute longer. Her bare back glowing from the slivers of sun sneaking its way in through the window. We had spent all night making love, talking, eating pizza, and sleeping in each other's arms. I had made the decision that at the end of the three weeks when Bo had to leave for Venice, I would surprise her in the city right before her two week break for the press junket. I was going to take her to that silly hill in Scotland where I first realized my deep feelings for her, and ask her to marry me.

I rolled my eyes at the plan, knowing I would need the assistance of the wonder twins to pull it off. I quietly closed the bedroom door, and slipped out of the house. The editing suite was a short walk down the street. I smiled, yawning from the lack of sleep, and pulled out my phone to call Effy.

As I rounded the last corner, Effy answered the phone. "Lauren."

"Elizabeth, why do you sound so serious?" I turned the corner, and my smile dropped as the mass of photographers spun around, saw me and started taking an incessant amount of pictures. "Shit. Effy, I thought Gilly released the statement."

"She did, but not before Bo's costar leaked the kissy kiss picture first. We were an hour too late, your statement has gotten lost in the mix. I'm working as hard as I can to get the legitimate news outlets to take on our statement. If they do that, the tabloids will lose steam." Effy was pacing, I could hear it in her voice. "Shit fuck balls, Lauren. This is a shit storm."

I covered my face, keeping my head down as I bum rushed through the crowd. "It is, but I'm more worried about Bo, than I am about me. Can you get word to her? I don't think they know where she's staying, take care of that. Then I want you to arrange a plan to get her to set in the morning." I ran into the open door my editor held for me. Reporters yelling disgusting questions my way. "I can handle this, my reputation is a formidable one." I ripped my sunglasses off, leaning against the wall as I heard reporters pounding on the door. There was a slow dread creeping over me. I hated the tabloids. "Detective, I need you."

"You have me. I will take care of it. The local police are on their way to clear out the crowd of paps. Gillian and I will brainstorm when we get to Bo's house. If anything, we'll move her to your small mansion for security." Effy growled. "That Ashley is going to get the long arm of the law in a few minutes. I've called my cousin the lawyer; he'll ensure she gets her due."

I let out a slow breath. "Just take care of Bo." I hung up on Effy and walked with my editor into the dark studio. He patted my shoulder, offering a few words of comfort before he fired up the monitors. I sat for a moment with my head in my hands. This wasn't how I wanted to start my life with Bo, I was scared. Scared she was going to get hurt from being the target of being with me, and those around her wanting to cash in on my fame.

I huffed, rubbing my face before I scooted up to the desk and focused on the work on hand. Trying so desperately not to go outside and scream in the faces of those idiots, then find Ashley and ruin her career with the flick of my hand. I sent another quick text to Effy, asking her again to keep Bo safe. I was afraid how she would react when she woke up to this. This wasn't what I wanted for us, and now I had to fix it.


	22. Chapter 22

**N: Little bit of a block, so this is what came out. I think i have an idea of what comes next, but we shall see. My time has been limited with work lately, so updates may come randomly. Enjoy and read on!**

* * *

Bo

Waking up with a smile was something I could get used to. I rolled over, clutching to her pillow. I was tired, and excited about the day off. Lauren and I had spent the night reconnecting on many levels, and it left my heart full. I scooted to the edge of the bed reaching for my phone, when the doorbell rang. I frowned, ignoring it, whoever it was could come back later. I yawned, typing out a message to Lauren, when the doorbell went off again. A little more aggressive than the first time.

I huffed, throwing my phone on the empty side of the bed, and got up. Whoever it was, was going to get an earful. After slipping into shorts and a tank top, I rushed to the door. Yanking it open, I grumbled. "This better be important."

"It is." Effy shoved past me, shutting the door behind her as she went through the house, checking windows and doors.

"What are you doing?" I crossed my arms, walking into the kitchen as she continued her investigation. "You're searching the house like I'm harboring a fugitive."

Effy sighed, tossing her bag on a chair. "You haven't seen the news, or been on the internet?"

I shook my head, fiddling with the coffee maker. "No. I just woke up when you rang my doorbell like a crazy salesman." I motioned to the coffee. "Would you like a cup? Where's Gillian?"

Effy nodded. "Yes, please. Gillian is back at the hotel, trying to handle the press issue we have on our hands." Effy pulled out her laptop and fired it up. "Promise me you won't freak out."

I raised an eyebrow. "That sounds foreboding." I leaned against the counter. "Please don't tell me Devin is causing more issues. Lauren and I just fell back into a decent place, I don't need him screwing it up."

Effy sighed, shoving the laptop in my direction. "If it was that simple." She tapped the edge of the screen. "Read."

I didn't have to bother to read, I could see the bold headlines blasted across the screen. Headlines that had Lauren and I in a scandalous relationship. Hurtful words painted in black, hovering over the picture Ashely took of us on the beach. I felt my heart drop, my stomach lurch, and my fears rear up. "Does Lauren know?"

"She does. She sent me over here to keep you safe." Effy smiled. "Her words exactly."

I scrunched my face up, looking down at the floor. "I thought. That statement, didn't you guys get it out? Why are the tabloids all over this?" I stopped, I really needed to get to Lauren. I was scared what this could do to her. I couldn't handle it if she ran again.

Effy moved to stand next to me, placing a comforting hand on my shoulder. "We were an hour too late. Ashley sold the picture ad it went to print within moments. I'm working on a lawsuit, a gag order on the tabloids, and Gillian is working her magic."

I glanced at the woman. "There's a but, isn't there."

Effy shrugged. "There isn't. The only issue is that you will have photographers all up in your business the second you step outside." She reached behind me, grabbing two mugs and the coffee. "Good news is your new director has already banned all press from the set, and will be meeting with me in a few hours to decided Ashley's fate." She shook her head, filling up the mugs. "Why is it that these young divas want to mess with you? It only ends in them back at the diner in Yokel Local city, slinging bland apple pie to truckers."

I wanted to laugh at the irony, but couldn't. I was nervous, and worried. "Are you sure Lauren is okay? I don't want a repeat performance…"

"Of her running like an Olympic sprinter? She won't. I promise. I saw her, and saw that she is more concerned with you." Effy pushed a full mug of coffee in front of me. "That woman finally figured love out, she won't give in as easily as before." Effy cocked an eyebrow, looking over my neck. "And it appears she's taken on vampiric characteristics."

I blushed furiously, covering the bite marks Lauren left along my collarbone. "I'm cold. I'm going to grab a sweater." I turned, running to my bedroom, catching Effy mumbling that it was already eighty degrees out.

Back in my bedroom, I opted to take a shower and dress. I wanted to head to Lauren and talk to her. I picked up my phone to send her a message, when I saw she already sent me one. I clicked on the message.

 _-I love you, Bo. Remember that. I have the wonder twins working on this. We'll get through it together.-_

I grinned, dropping the phone to the bed. My heart felt lighter after reading that message. It solidified that Lauren was in the fight with me. Our love was going to be stronger than any stupid tabloid, or jealous idiots.

* * *

XXX

Lauren

I could barely focus on the film, my mind constantly drifting to the press outside. They had caused such a ruckus, the local police had to push them back from the editing studio. Now they were sitting across the road, waiting like angry poachers. I had a moment of relief when Effy called me to inform me that Bo was safe, and staying inside for the day. At least there was that.

But it still had me worried. The tabloids had been a critical part of both our lives, in the regards that they were always infecting our lives. Spreading disease and ruining things. I felt anxious, I wanted to finish editing and then leave France. Hide from the tabloids until the dust died down, and try to take Bo with me. I rolled my eyes, leaning back in the chair as the final scene of the film rolled by. I couldn't take Bo with me, she still had a job that was weeks from being done. I glanced at the clock, it was almost ten o'clock in the evening, I'd been in the editing studio for almost thirteen hours. I sucked in a breath, looking over at my editor. "Let's call it a night and meet in the morning. It looks like we only have a few more hours left before I sent it to post production."

I patted his shoulder and stood up from the chair, working out stiff legs and patting an empty stomach. I had forgone eating all day to focus on work, and avoid going outside.

After collecting my things, I walked to the front door of the studio where Gillian sat reading a magazine about wine. She smirked looking up, "About time."

I shook my head. "Why are you here? Shouldn't you be basking in the sun with wine?" I shifted my bag higher on my shoulder. "Are we in better shape?"

Gillian stood up, stuffing the wine magazine in my bag. "I want to finish the article on Napa Valley wineries." She winked, running a hand through her long red hair. "I spent the day basking in wine and sun, but was sent over to collect you and escort you back to your residence. Detectives orders." She took my elbow. "Gives us time to talk about Bo."

I gave her a look. "Bo? I thought Bo was okay in your detectives care."

Gillian sighed. "She was. Then she opened her front door. Lizbet said the flashing bulbs were like a furious lightning storm, and it rattled Bo. Triggered her memories from when she was a superstar. The poor girl is having a bit of a panic attack."

I went to race out the front door, when Gillian held me back. "Easy tiger. We have to do this slowly, not give the press more fuel to burn their fires."

I felt my blood pressure rise, my anger rising with it. "Did you take care of what I asked you to?" I clenched my jaw.

"I did. The legitimate outlets have your statement. A few will be contacting Lizbet for an interview in a day, and the rags have dwindled down." She reached for the door, pulling it open to reveal there were only a few photographers waiting. "I also may have planted a story about Assley and her affair with that disgusting executive producer on this new film. You know the one, the sweaty pig that groped my ass at the Golden Globes last year, asking if I wanted to be his muse? He's married with six children and his wife has been eager for an out, and I gave her one. Word has it, it'll be the messiest divorce in Hollywood history."

I shoved my sunglasses on my face, not caring that it was already dark out, keeping my head down as a few flash bulbs went off. "Then why am I worried about Bo? If the wonder twins have solved the case." I checked my phone. "The last message from Bo was her telling me everything was fine."

"Because, she's panicking. She's not used to the fame we've endured for the last few years. Perhaps it's a fear you'll run on her again. Or who knows, but Effy said she lost it a little bit and has been very silent. She's was afraid to leave her villa until Lizbet snuck her out the back door." Gillian grinned, flipping off the cameras as she walked me to her car. "We decided to take her to your house, it's much safer there and the press won't go pat your gate."

I frowned, sitting in the car. "What can I do?" I looked at my best friend. "Why wasn't this a problem when we dated?"

Gillian laughed, tapping the driver on the shoulder. "Because, my dear, everyone was afraid of us. I'm not sure if you know, but you have a frigid reputation and I have a lack of giving a shit, reputation. Putting the two together and it's impenetrable. That and we both had a stone solid legal defense that wipe their bums with tabloids." She turned to me. "Bo has neither. She's a girl in love and broken from a past that tossed her about like a rag doll. You're her strength, Lauren."

I dropped my head into my hands. "Tomorrow is the last day in editing. I send the film off tomorrow afternoon and then I'm free to do what I want until award season."

"And you have an itch in your runners, don't you?" Gillian's voice shifted, I was about to get a lecture.

I held up a hand. "Before you start your lecture, let me finish." I leaned back, looking in her green eyes. "I do want to run, disappear from the press, but I want to take Bo with me. But. I can't. She has a solid contract and this movie will carry her even further than mine." I furrowed my brow. "How do I help her?"

Gillian squinted at me. "This is the pickle of all pickles indeed." She rubbed at her chin, deep in thought. "You can't whisk her away, her contract is almost as solid as yours." She continued to think as the driver rounded the corner to my house, pulling up the long discreet driveway that led to my back patio. "I need my detective to help with this brainstorm."

I nodded, and got out of the car, leaving Gillian behind as I half ran into the house. I found Effy sitting on the couch, drinking tea and watching a show about the royal family on the large television. I went to ask her where Bo was, she pointed towards the far bedroom in the back of the house. "She's back there, resting." Effy glanced at me with concerned eyes. "I tried my best Lauren, but she's beyond rattled."

I frowned, whispering out a thank you as I ran towards the back bedroom I used as an office. There I found Bo sitting on the edge of the bed facing the open window. The rising moonlight filling the room. I took in a deep breath and moved to kneel in front of her. My heart broke at the sight of her puffy eyes, a sign she had been crying most of the day. "Bo."

Bo didn't look at me, her eyes forward out the window. "They were everywhere. Taking my picture like I was a tourist attraction." Her voice was raspy.

I reached for her hand, frowning when it was cold in my hand. "I know. The girls are taking care of it. They've gotten my statement to a few people. I'll be doing an interview in a few days, that should chase the hounds away." I felt my nerves rise when Bo didn't grab my hand like she always did when I held it. "We'll be okay. We're in this together."

"They asked me horrible questions about you. Shouting them in the windows, against the door, and I felt smothered." She tilted her head down to look at me. "It was bad when I was on the show, but this. They're like animals fighting over the last bone." She sniffled, wiping her cheeks. "One grabbed me as I tried to close the door." Her voice trembled. I clenched my jaw. I knew exactly what she was talking about. The foreign press was far more aggressive than the paparazzi in the states. They would grab, push, shove and do what it took to get the story.

I covered Bo's hand in both of mine. "I'll have the police file a report."

Bo shook her head. "It's fine. Effy took care of it, she shoved him back and used her cop voice." She smiled softly. "It scared the rest of them off, and I think one pissed himself."

I smirked, kissing the top of Bo's hand. "I'll have to give her a raise." I stood up, sitting next to Bo and wrapping her in my arms. She was so cold, a sign that she was in a sort of shock. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Bo took a moment before sliding her arms around me. "I don't know Lauren. This is new to me, this level of fame and I'm not sure if I can handle it." She buried her face into the side of my neck. "I'm not sure I want it."

I took a deep breath. This was my fault. My fame was overshadowing her chances at a rebirth in film. "I'm sorry, Bo. This is all my fault." I held her tighter. "I'll call my legal team in the morning and have them work on protecting you. If any of these people come for you, they'll regret it." I looked out the window. "I'll stay in France until your break. You can stay here in my house until the press moves onto the next Kardashian headline. I'll figure this out." I frowned at my reflection in the window. This really was all my fault. If I hadn't ran on her, we would've moved through this together. I could've released the statement when Devin was being a dickhead, announced to the world that Bo and I were together, and Ashely wouldn't have cared so much. None of what happened this morning, would've happened, and I wouldn't be holding a shivering, scared woman.

Bo sighed heavily in my arms. "I don't know if I can do this. It was too hard the first time, and I'm not strong enough to fight the press again." I heard Bo let out a soft cry. "I have Effy looking over my contract, see what the penalties of breaching it will be."

I leaned back, holding Bo up. "Bo, please don't. Stay with this film, don't let the world outside ruin your dreams." I reached up, wiping away tears. "You deserve all the good that's come to you now, please don't throw it all away." I tried to smile to ease her. "You're amazing, a better actress than most out there, and this is your time. I will stay here, I'll leave, I'll hide in the shadows, I'll do anything you ask of me, as long as you promise me that you will finish this film. I vaguely remember you giving me a heart to heart about following through on my dream when I wanted to quit." I held Bo's face in both of my hands. "I owe it to you to be here for you now, like you were for me. Even when I didn't know it."

Bo smiled weakly, nodding before she fell back into my arms. I ran my hands over her back, trying to warm her up. I held her close, whispering in the dark room. "I love you, Bo. You're my strength, and I will always be yours."

I stared out the window until Bo fell asleep in my arms. After I gently carried her to my bed, tucking her in to a pile of blankets, I went to find Effy and Gillian sitting in the kitchen like a war command centre. Both of them hovering over laptops and pounding away. Gillian looked up, grinning. "Tomorrow at 5pm our time, you have a phone interview with three of the good media outlets. You'll have your chance to tell your side." She then nudged Effy. Who didn't look up from her laptop as she spoke. "Ashley has been fired, her character will find an untimely death in the film. The tabloids should be backing off by the time your interview lands on the front page, and all will be quiet. I meet with Bo's director tomorrow to discuss things, but he's already asked that you don't make set visits at this location until the film moves to Venice." Effy gave me a look.

I nodded in agreement, walking to the fridge for a cherry coke. "I understand. I'll wrap up my film and maybe take a few days back to England to check out what Barton has and get the post production team set up." I looked at Effy as I unscrewed the bottle cap. "Will you be with Bo?" I was nervous to leave Bo, but thought a day or two apart might help ease the stress from the tabloid. I would bait them to follow me, leaving Bo alone.

Effy nodded, staring. "Of course." She paused. "What's wrong?"

I smiled at her keen observation skills. "Bo. Bo is shaken to the core and I'm worried. I'm worried she's reach her final breaking point and will quit this movie." I let out a slow breath. "What happened when she opened her door?"

Effy stood up. "She was swarmed. Literally like a beehive had just fallen at her feet. They were brutal, grabbing at her, yelling at her, and asking all sorts of things with a camera shoved into her face. When the one unlucky fellow grabbed her, that's when she snapped and fell to the floor. I rushed the idiot, shoved him on his ass and chased the rest off. When I went back to her, she was pale, shivering and begged me to take her somewhere safe." Effy frowned. "I'm sorry Lauren, I should've known better."

I shook my head, patting Effy on the arm. "It's not your fault, but can you dig into the days when Bo was first famous? I've a sinking feeling about her reaction. She hates the tabloids, but it's in a more petrified way." I set the cherry coke on the counter, looking at Gillian. "She's in shock, cold and zoned out."

Gillian groaned. "Just like Carl was when he fell off the rigging and broke his ass." She looked at her girlfriend. "Carl was a sound rigger on Lauren's last film, he got tangled up in his own rigging and fell eight feet to the hard mud. Luckily, he only broke his ass, but it ruined him for months after. The set doctors said it was a sort of PTSD." Gillian scrunched her face up. "You think Bo has that?"

I shrugged, moving to stand in between the two women. "I don't know, but it's worth looking into. The way she's acting right now is not normal. She's feisty, happy, and stubborn. The woman sleeping in my bed is meek, weak, tired and not my Bo." I grabbed the laptop from Effy. "Either way, I made a promise to stay and fight, and to fight properly, I need to know what, and who, I'm fighting."

Gillian grinned, slapping my back. "Fuck yes. I've been waiting years to see this side of you." She winked at me. "Too bad I'm beyond smitten with a detective, or I would have my panties in a right twist over this bold side of you."

Effy groaned, swatting Gillian with a bag of muffins before throwing them on the table between us. "Gilly, stop or no more police nights."

Gillian's eyes grew wide, and she held up her hands, stepping away from me. "I hear you loud and clear, Lizbet." She turned back to her laptop, typing away. "Now, let's find out about your girl."

I chuckled as Effy kissed Gillian's cheek, whispering that she loved her, and sat down. I was determined to find out why Bo was so upset about the tabloids, and when I did. I would hunt everyone that ever hurt her, and ruin their lives.


	23. Chapter 23

**N: super short one, but it helps me figure out what comes next. So read and enjoy. I go back to work tomorrow so things will be random for a bit, and that i'm back on meds for a sinus infection, so things won't make sense or they'll get super sappy.**

* * *

 **Bo**

I woke up hours ago, Lauren next to me on her side, sleeping like the dead. I wanted to smile and curl up into her, but I couldn't. I was afraid to get closer to her for an unknown, irrational reason. Instead I slipped out of bed, careful not to touch Lauren. For whatever reason, I was afraid to touch her. I didn't even look at her as I crept around Gillian and Effy sleeping in each other's arms on the couch, and left the house. I had a very early call time, and that invisible force was back. The one force that often took control when it appeared out of nowhere. Guiding me into a different direction than the one that took me towards being happy and forgetting about the past. That stupid force was rattled loose when the photographers bombarded the front door, grabbing me and pushing me to the ground. I felt my mind crack the second my ass hit the floor. The memories rushed back and I was trapped in what the doctors all said was a mild form of PTSD.

As I walked outside onto the quiet streets, the early morning chill nipping at my skin, I frowned at those doctor's diagnosis. I wasn't in the career where PTSD made sense. I wasn't a war veteran, saving lives. I wasn't a paramedic, a first responder, or anything that I related PTSD to in this day and age. I was a cheesy sci-fi actress who had been hounded by aggressive paparazzi all over the world. But now, as I stiffly walked towards my villa, I could feel the detachment sinking in. The anxiety and fear to be around others, inch into my heart. It was like someone flicked a switch when that asshole grabbed me, throwing me back to six years ago, and one of the worst days of my life. I couldn't even feel Lauren when she sat next to me, holding my hand. All I felt was the fear, the pain, the anxiety, and how it controlled me in the blink of an eye.

Walking into my villa, everything felt off. The only thing I could think of to do was get dressed, and head to the set. A place where I could pretend and hide for a few hours, avoiding people until I could get a handle on my anxiety and right this ship. I walked to the closet, packing a small bag for set, before heading to the bathroom. I started the shower, staring at my reflection in the mirror as the steam filled the room. I took a deep breath, wiping at my eyebrow and removing the makeup I applied daily to hide the memory from myself and others. I stared at the thin, long scar that ran the length of my eyebrow. A constant reminder of how extreme fame would inevitably bring me pain. I had been alone that day, with no one to help me, sit with me in the hospital, or help fight the legal battle that followed. I had learned then, that I couldn't rely on anyone and carried that with me for the last six years. Now, that feeling returned. I had to be alone, struggle through this break alone. It was the only way I knew how to, or so that's what my thoughts kept telling me.

I tipped my head away from the mirror, and climbed into the shower. My thoughts were numb and distant, and when I closed my eyes, I only saw that day. Heard the sounds, felt the pain, and saw the lightning of cameras flashing in my face. It overshadowed the warm feeling I usually carried. A feeling that now felt completely out of my reach.

* * *

 **XXXX**

I rolled over, my hand moving across the mattress in hopes of finding Bo. I sat up when my hand reached the other side of the bed without colliding with a warm body. I squinted, the morning sun filling the room with bright light. Bo was missing. Her side of the bed was beyond cool, telling me that it had been hours since she was next to me. I scooted out of the bed, and rushed into the front room. Bo's bag was missing, and there was no note. "Fuck." I ran into the kitchen and towards the living room. Still nothing but all of the laptops and notes from last night's research. I ran to the couch where Gillian was curled on top of Effy, sleeping peacefully with a smile, and shoved her shoulder. "Where's Bo?"

Gillian frowned, snuggling deeper into her girlfriend, mumbling for me to piss off. I shook her harder, this time waking up Effy. "Wake up. Bo's gone."

Effy was the one who reacted first, sitting straight up with wide eyes focused on me. "Gone?"

I nodded as I started pacing. "Yes, gone. The bed is cold as hell, which is never the case when Bo is in it. She's like a mini furnace." I waved a hand around. "Her things are gone and I'm about to shit a brick wall." I shook my head. "We should've woken her up when we found the police report from her incident."

Effy gently shoved Gillian off her, and climbed over the back of the couch, scurrying to the laptops. She picked up her phone, calling Bo. "It'll be fine. She had an early call time today. She could be on set."

I started chewing on my thumb. "Then go to the set. I'm banned, so my desire to run there immediately is out." I paced back and forth. "What's her schedule like today?"

Effy stared at me as she smiled with relief. "Thanks, Will, yes please give her a message to call me asap." She dropped the phone on the counter. "Bo is on set. She's safe." She ran her hands through messy hair. "Her schedule is tight today. She has a lunch break at two, and then nothing until they wrap at eleven tonight."

I nodded. "Good, good." I then glared at Effy. "Perhaps you should go be with her on set? Try and talk to her? Tell her we know and that she's going to be fine?"

Effy didn't answer me, only running to the bathroom to freshen up. She came back out in record time and disappeared out the front door. When the door clicked shut, I walked out to the pool and sat down with my heads in my hands. I had to fight the urge to run to Bo and be with her. I cursed myself for not waking her up when Effy handed me the police report from her accident in Italy. The proof of why Bo was so scared with this new level of fame, was because it almost killed her.

I dug my nails into my scalp, trying to maintain a grip on everything when I felt Gillian sit next to me. "Lauren, relax. Lizbet will be there." She dropped her hand to the middle of my back. "None of us wanted to wake Bo. It was two in the morning and the girl was drained."

"I should've woken her up." I huffed, leaning back to look at Gillian. "No wonder she is constantly nervous around the press. I should've picked up on it when she had that mild freak out in London when they surrounded the car."

"Lauren, none of us had any idea Bo was in a horrible car accident six years ago. It took all of Lizbet's detective powers to find the report in the Italian database. Still curious why she decided to look there." Gillian pulled me closer. "I vaguely remember that Italy has stricter laws about their press, but I'm glad they sent those men to jail."

I closed my eyes, going over the police report for the thousandth time. Bo had been in Italy for the show's premier over there. Her fame in Europe was ten times larger than it was in the states, and she was hounded like a member of the royal family. Photographers hid in the bushes, snuck into her hotel room, and chased her in her car as she drove around. I frowned deeper as I opened my eyes. Bo had been chased by a car full of photographers, and when she took a turn to head back to her hotel, the car cut her off. She swerved to miss another car, and due to her speed, she rolled the car three times. She was trapped in the small car, and cried out for help. The photographers stopped next to her, not to help, but to get the perfect shot. One actually reached into the car and pulled on her broken arm to get a better shot. Bo sat in that car, photographed incessantly for ten minutes until the local police could get there and rescue her. She was taken to the hospital with a broken arm, cuts, and bruises. She spent a week in the hospital, and was released. All her doctors marveled at the fact she somehow managed to survive the accident, the damage to the car was that extensive.

Bo immediately went back to the states, and her legal team fought to have the pictures turned over to them. The story never went anywhere and Bo did secret treatment, but stopped when it interfered with her shooting schedule. The story never made it to the papers, and since I was on the I hate Bo Dennis train, I never paid any attention to her minor skiing accident. I was too busy burying my head in writing scripts in between pizza deliveries.

"I'm more curious how she got into Bo's medical records." I turned to look at the pool. "But yes, I'm glad the man who touched her, is serving a life sentence in the pit of an Italian prison. Eating rats and playing wife to a very big, burly man." I sighed, covering my face with both of my hands. "If her records are correct, she's relapsing. That asshole who grabbed her at the door, sent her back to that day." I huffed. "I should've…"

"You couldn't have known, Lauren. So, don't blame yourself for any of this. You, for once, did everything right. I was the one who had piss poor timing." Gillian frowned, chewing on her thumb. "I should've known a hungry animal like Assley would've beat me to the races." Gillian groaned. "If I could get my hands on her."

"It all makes sense, why Bo was distant. Why she's always been nervous about the tabloids and their effect on me." I closed my eyes. "Again, jerk Lauren too focused on her own misery to sit and ask Bo more about why she hated the tabloids. Maybe then she would've told me this story, instead of bottling it up for my sake." I groaned. "It's never ending for us. What I wouldn't give to go back seven years ago, and wait for her. We both could be teachers in the Midwest." I was rambling, looking over at Gillian still gnawing on her thumb and thinking about her own involvement in this newest mess. I reached up, pulling Gillian's hand away from her mouth. "You'd do nothing but cut Assley with words. Effy did plenty from what I understand. That girl won't have a life outside of cleaning tables at Denny's for the rest of her life." I smiled softly. "You do realize that we both have fierce women now?" I felt my smile fade. "God I'm so worried about Bo. It's not like her to disappear without a word, that's my modius operandi

Gillian hit my shoulder. "She's fine. Stop it." She stood up, picking up her ringing phone from the arm of the couch and answering it. "Lizbet my love, is everything okay?"

I watched Gillian walk to the edge of the pool, her face shifting to a look of concern. "Okay. Alright, I'll tell Lauren." She whispered a goodbye and turned my way. "Good news or bad news first?"

I swallowed hard and sat on the edge of the couch. "Bad news, please."

Gillian sighed. "The good news is Lizbet is with Bo. She's on set filming and to the random passerby, it looks like nothing is wrong. Lizbet, however, can tell that Bo is in a bit of a state. This is where the bad news slips in." Gillian paused, twirling the phone in her hands. "Lizbet asked if Bo wanted to meet you for lunch." She paused again, driving me nuts.

"Goddamit, Gilly! Get it out. Is lunch pushed back a few hours or what?" I stood up, walking over to the redhead.

Gillian frowned. "Bo asked that you don't come to the set, and leave her be for a few days. She told Lizbet she needs to think about this new level of fame, your relationship, and the fact that there was a small hoard of photographers waiting outside for her. It seems the story hasn't died down, just grown in steam. They're primarily focusing on her since the picture of her from yesterday morning hit the news. They smell blood, and know she'll break well before you do." Gillian tipped her head down. "I'm sorry Lauren. I should've been quicker."

I clenched my hands in tight fists. "No. Goddamit no. This. No." I paced with anger up and down. Ready to hit something. "We just got back together. I'm not going to let this bullshit get in the fucking way." I glared at Gillian. "Congratulations, you've just become my PR assistant." I pointed at her as she pressed a hand against her chest in mild shock. "Get over it. Since my usual assistant is with Bo, you win by default." I ran back into the house, grabbing a laptop. "I'm going to run to the editing studio, finish the film. You're going to make all the calls to all the people we know in the legitimate outlets, and set up interviews for this afternoon. We're going to suck the wind out of the tabloids and then I'm going to go for Bo." I tapped away angrily on the keyboard. "You still have that costume kit in your luggage?"

Gillian glared at me as she moved to stand next to me. "Of course. It's become habit to carry one. I often feel like pasting on a mustache and having coffee like the regular folk."

I chuckled. "And here I thought it was so you could sneak on to the set of your dragon show, get closer to your crush after you were banned from the England set."

Gillian raised her eyebrows. "How did you…you know what, never mind." She bent over a laptop. "I'll have the hotel bring my case up here, if you promise never to tell my Lizbet about the dragon incident of last year. I had to bribe security with a lifetime of free movie tickets not to reveal my true face." She sighed, firing up a skype call. "Go, Lauren. Go take care of the film, Roger and I will take care of the rest."

I grabbed her into a tight hug, squeezing the daylights out of her. "Thank you. Thank you for everything Gillian."

She reluctantly hugged me back. "Just give my Lizbet a raise and promise me that I don't have to audition for your next film." I nodded, and went to run out of the house when she called after me. "I love this side of you, Lauren. The fighter look is smashing on you. Now, go. I'll have your armor ready to go face the dragon when get back."

I shook my head, racing out the door and running down the street. I had to finish my film, it was a promise I made to so many, including Bo. The second it was done, I would pour all of my focus into Bo. Show her that she would forever have me in her corner.


	24. Chapter 24

**N: short, messy, and what not. But i was stumped on this chapter. Wrote myself in a corner i had to muddle out of. I also realized i don't think i ever named the stupid movie Lauren was making...i think? Or did I? Anyway, read on, enjoy and maybe this weekend i'll write the next chapter. I have to think about what's next.**

 **There are thoughts of publishing this down the road. It might happen, and as usual with my ff turned og pieces, things will be fixed, added, corrected. So, maybe, we will see. It's an idea that i'm tossing around, and possibly adding in bits i wrote for another story very similar to this one.**

* * *

Bo

The dinner break couldn't come quick enough. I would have two hours to myself, and could hide in a corner away from everyone. It had been a tense twelve hours on set. Starting off with the paparazzi swarming the second I walked to the studio gates. Then there was the awkward meeting with Connor about keeping my personal life separate, followed by Effy hovering around me like a nervous sister. I was fine when Connor shouted action, slipping with ease into someone else's life, hiding from mine for however many minutes the scene took. Then cut would be called, and I switch back, shutting down and retreating to a shadow.

Effy would constantly look at me, silently asking if I was okay. I would smile softly, nod, and move to a quiet corner to the next scene. The truth was, I wasn't sure if I really was okay. It pained me to ask Lauren to stay away from a few days, but I did. It was that strange cloud returning. The same one that popped up a few days after my accident, the one my therapist said was a part of my PTSD. I disagreed with her, thinking it was lingering stress and would go away. But now it was back, controlling me and clouding my thoughts. All I wanted to do was be alone until I decided what I really wanted from this my new life. I somehow attached Lauren to the press, the press to my past, and now I was drowning in that haze. Always looking over my shoulder, trembling.

I walked slowly through the parking lot, heading to a small picnic table outside the trailers. The rest of the cast had gone down to the hotel for dinner, my polite decline to join them, left me standing in the warm evening air, plucking at my costume. Effy was three steps behind me, tapping on her phone.

"Bo? Would you like me to run out for something to eat?" She smiled genuinely, her kind eyes begging for me to let her help. "Gilly is meeting me outside."

I shrugged, keeping my head down as my hand idly cradled the necklace I still hadn't taken off. "A salad. I'm not very hungry." I sat down at the picnic table, looking out on the down slope of a hill. The town below was in full view, offering thoughtless people watching.

"A salad it is." Effy stood next to me on an angle, setting my phone down. "If you would like, there's a few links I emailed you. Lauren did a full day of interviews, about you and her." She paused, waiting for a reaction. When I ignored her, she continued. "Your shooting schedule has changed. They've moved up your mid break a week. You'll have three weeks off, the last coincides with the press junket for Blitzkrieg. After that, you're off to Venice for the last half. Appears killing of Ashley's character moved the film forward." Effy's voice was thick with sarcasm.

I nodded, pushing my phone away. "Okay. I'll take a look in a few." I leaned forward, I was tired, lost and wished I could push through the haze. It was choking me.

Effy waited a moment. "Alright. I'm off, I'll drop off the salad in ten minutes. If you need anything." Her hand fell to my shoulder, squeezing it soothingly. "Anything at all. Call me, and I'll rush right back, Bo. Anything at all."

"Thank you." I kept my eyes forward. "Tell Gillian hello." I knew in her tone, she had done a detective Effy and found the police report. I saw it in her eyes when she rushed on to set this morning, the overwhelming desire to hug me to death. I just didn't know how to talk about that day, a day I didn't like talking about. If I did talk about it, it all came back. I had done a great job keeping it in the dark, until that asshole grabbed me. Snapping me back six years, to that cobblestone street and a crushed Fiat.

Effy left me alone, sighing softly before walking away. I leaned forward, covering my face with both of my hands. I had eight more hours of shooting before I could crawl into bed and sleep. I was on autopilot, only wanting to move through the days to get to the end. What that end was? I really didn't have an idea.

Thirty minutes passed in silence. I sat, staring out at the life below me, ignoring my phone as it lit up with messages from Effy. I reached over, turning the phone face down, and laid my head on the wooden table top. I closed my eyes when I heard heavy boots scrape across the concrete, pausing right behind me. It was one of the security guards on his rounds. "I'm fine, just very tired."

"Um, your assistant gave me this to bring to you." The voice was void of the heavy French accent most of the guards had, it was also higher, like a teenage boy on the verge of puberty. I sat up, turning to look at this new guard as a plastic salad tub was set in front of me. "She said she got you the spinach kale mix?"

I scrunched my face up, looking at the young man in front of me. A large bushy black mustache on his upper lip, a grimy black security cap, with big aviator sunglasses covering his eyes. I quickly saw that his uniform was four sizes too big for him, hanging off his shoulders like a circus tent. The kid looked barely old enough to drive, let alone guard anything. "Are you new? I've not seen you around the studio." I picked up the tub, suddenly very hungry. Maybe if I pretended to eat, he would leave me alone.

"Yeah, I just started today." The young man cleared his throat. "You mind if I join you? I was heading out on my break when your assistant stopped me." He went to sit next to me, that's when I caught a very familiar scent. A mix of cherry coke, fresh linen, and the ocean air.

I squinted at the young man as he sat next to me. "What's your name?"

The young man smiled, the massive moustache hiding most of his mouth. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a banana, setting it next to me. "I heard you like bananas. And my name is B. B. Arthur." He pulled off his sunglasses and looked right at me.

I swallowed hard looking right into Lauren's big amber eyes. "Lauren…" I tipped my head down as my heart practically exploded in my chest, excited that its true love was sitting next to me. My mind, on the other hand was stuck in that haze. "You're banned from set." The lump in my throat was the size of Pluto. "That mustache is horrible." I cleared my throat, looking at my salad.

"Yes, I certainly am, and yes it certainly is." She chuckled, picking at the mustache. "It's a first for me, being banned. I'm usually the one creating the banned list." Lauren dropped her hand from her face. "The real new security guard, Alvo, did not bend when I showed up at the front gate three hours ago. Adamant my name was on the studio banned list." She stared at me for a second, as if she hadn't seen me in years. "But, luckily for me, I had a friend on the force. Let me borrow his uniform, while Gillian happily provided this incredible disguise." She tweaked the mustache once more. "That woman is strange, gets stranger the more I learn about her."

I picked at the plastic tub, hesitating before blurting out. "Why are you here? I know Effy told you…"

"It's simple Bo, you're here, so I'm here. Effy did tell me that you wanted a few days, I know. It was a tough thing to hear, since I never want to live more than day away from you." Lauren moved closer, turning her body to face me. "But I made a promise to you. I swore my life to a fight in your honor, and will break all the goddamn rules preventing me from that fight. I'll admit it, I know about the accident. The detective found it, and Bo, I'm here. I love you so much, it was impossible not see you." She slowly laid her warm hand on my bare forearm. Sending chills up my spine. "I'm here, and whatever you need, I'll do it."

I bit my bottom lip, trying so very hard not to break into tears. I could feel in her touch how much she loved me, it was overpowering in the best way. I swallowed hard a few times, before my fog snapped and my mind took the opening. Shouting at me to pour everything out before the haze settled back in on us. "That's the arm I broke in the accident." I nodded towards her hand. "It aches in the cold weather, and I have a hard time opening pickle jars." I winced as Lauren moved her hand down to cover mine. "They chased me like I was a dog, a wanted fugitive. I was scared and ran. It's intimidating as hell to have a van of men racing behind you, hitting the bumper and pushing me all over the road." I let out a slow breath, feeling the warm tears glide through the heavy makeup plastered on my cheeks. "I was going too fast, took a sharp turn." I paused, closing my eyes. "The pain, the smell of oil, gas, blood, was enough. Then the camera flashes, and those animals crawling in my car for that one shot." I went to pull my hand close to my chest, but couldn't. Lauren had picked up my hand and pulled it into her chest, against her own racing heart. "He pulled so hard on my arm, it misaligned the bones. I had to have surgery to fix it." I let out a heavy sob, covering my mouth with my free hand.

"Bo, you don't have to." She scooted closer, so close I could feel her body heat pushing through the nagging cold I had felt for the last day or so. "I will never, ever, let anything like that happen again." Her voice dropped to a soft whisper, tinged with anger.

I glanced at Lauren, the haze sapping the rest of my bravado in finishing the story, pulling me back into the negative. "But you can't control it. Your fame, it's always going to be bigger than we can control." I scrunched my face up. "What if they hurt you to get to me? I would never forgive myself." I tugged my hand free from hers, folding both of my arms across my chest. "I'm scared, Lauren. This level of fame, it's costly. A very heavy price, and I'm not sure. Bad things happen when you are _this_ _famous_ , privacy is a pipedream." I shook my head, closing my eyes as the haze returned. "I can't."

"You can." Lauren wrapped a hand around my elbow. "You're the toughest woman I've ever met. You put up one hell of a fight when I was being the Mike Tyson of assholes to you. Shit, Gillian is even afraid of you." Lauren smiled when I gave her a look. "She told me about the night shoot where she kept prodding you about our evenings together, you snapped and threatened her. Put the fear of god in that unsinkable woman."

I shrugged. "I just threatened to tell everyone about her dragon girl obsession and how she's a step away from a restraining order." I wiped at my cheeks, looking at the woman I loved with a massive mustache. "I don't know, Lauren. I don't know if this haze I'm in, if you're stronger than it. If we are." I rasped out the last few words.

Lauren looked over her shoulder, hearing a few cast members coming back to the studio. "I have like three minutes before I get into a real jam." She pulled out an envelope from the back of her baggy shirt, and set it in front of me. "In there is a list the best in PTSD treatment. You can go to all of them, or pick one, it's been taken care of. I need you to look at the emails about your schedule, I need you to meet me somewhere before the stupid press junket starts. Effy will have the travel details." She stood up, adjusting her oversized gear belt. "I'm staying here until you leave. I will give you a few days, but promise me, at the end, you meet me before we fly back to the states." She stared at me for a moment, before leaning forward and kissing me deeply, her stupid fake mustache tickling my nose. I immediately responded, leaning into her kiss out of pure habit and addiction. When she parted, she whispered, "I love you unconditionally, Bo. All of you, and yes, we are stronger than anyone, or anything that would dare to stand in our way." She ran her hand down the side of my cheek before putting the sunglasses back on. "If you need me, I'll be sitting on the balcony, waiting for you."

She mouthed I love you before running off into a corner as two regular security guards walked towards me. Both smiling and waving as I smiled tightly. I let out a slow breath as they passed by, reaching for phone and hesitating with a shaky thumb before I clicked on the emails.

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XXX

Lauren

One week later

Six whole days, and I was about to lose my mind. I'd only heard from Bo here and there since I falsely portrayed a security official. In texts telling me thank you and that she had met with the top therapist I hired to help her, mixed with idle chat about her day. And last night, I got a message with a few bananas and hearts. It was a good sign, but I was worried. I was worried and I missed her like an addict going through withdrawals. I had talked to the same therapist; taking her advice to let Bo go through a few sessions without me, build up her confidence.

At least I had my trusty detective, who hadn't left Bo's side while I maintained space. Something that was new for me. When my other relationships asked for space, I gave it to them, then ghosted on them. I had done it to Gillian when I rebuked her request to give her more when we were dating. Bo was different, something in my gut told me what I was doing, was the best thing for both us. Bo needed to heal, and I needed to learn how to bury jerk Lauren forever.

Effy kept me calm, telling me that Bo was in a crunch with shooting as her director want to get as much done before they broke and shifted locations. Eight hour days turned into sixteen, and Bo would go straight home, skype with the therapist and sleep. Hearing that gave me hope. Effy did tell me two days ago, that Bo had finally watched my interviews, breaking down in happy tears as I professed to the entire world she was my girlfriend, and the rest of the world could go kiss my ass. Kiss our asses and leave us the hell alone. My hope was turning into a solid victory, I was going to make this work. Bo would never have to worry about shitty press chasing her. The press was generally bored with me, Bo being the most exciting thing I'd done since I came into the spotlight. The interviews had done the trick with the media, sucking the scandal right out of the entire story and Ashley's exclusive picture. The steamy forbidden beach kiss, became the boring couple picture everyone saw in the what's new section of People. We kept up some interest until two days after my interviews were printed. Some rock star and his actress girlfriend took over the spotlight. Something about him being caught giving a group of his fans a very private serenade backstage. I remember giggling at the headline, a play on the words of guitar hero group sex.

Now, I was pacing like a rabid animal around my luggage. Gillian was picking me up to take us to the airport. Our flight to Scotland was a few hours earlier than Bo's, giving me an opportunity to set up my idea. I labeled it as an idea, not a proposal. I had to feel out Bo, see if she was in a good place before I went in the direction of a romantic gesture, or a life changing event. I started chewing on my finger, when a perfectly manicured hand swatted it angrily out of my mouth.

"Take up smoking, for queen's sake." Gillian rolled her eyes at me. "It's less filthy than you leaking fluids out of gnawed off fingers."

"I'm nervous." I jammed my hand into a pocket, walking towards my bags. "I might throw up, or worse."

"If worse means shite in your jeans, I'll get you a cab." Gillian sauntered after me, dressed in her own fitted jeans, a shirt that looked a lot like one Effy wore on location in Scotland, and designer boots. "You need to relax. Your soon to be other half is equally as squirrely. Lizbet said Bo was getting better, but pissed that no one will tell her why she needs to be on a plane in two hours." Gillian cocked an eyebrow my way.

I frowned, picking up my bags and shoving them into her arms. "Yeah, well, you telling me that does very little in keeping my confidence up." I turned and headed out the front door. "Is this a bad idea? Me swooping her off to Scotland, and doing this stupid plan I came up with?"

"Sweeping the love of your life off to the exact spot that you feel irreversibly in love with her, to ask her to marry you and be your wife until you are an even more cranky old woman? Suffer through cherry coke shortages, your distaste for mornings, the workaholic side of you, and that you have more money than small countries, and yet you purchase clothing from the dumpsters behind the store." Gillian shrugged, grinning. "It'll be incredible, Lauren."

She dug into her purse, tossing me a shiny black ring box, I caught it with both hands, glaring her way. "Gilly, if I had dropped this..."

"It would've bounced." She stood in front of me, tapping the box. "Your mother shipped it in a steel box. I dropped it twice already and there's barely a visible dent." She laughed at the horrified look on my face. "I'm not kidding." She took the box, lifting the lid to reveal the simple gold band with three diamonds. "It's gorgeous. The restoration was well done."

I grinned looking at my grandmother's engagement ring. "Yes indeed." I tilted the box in the sunlight, the diamonds sparkling. "She gave it to me in hopes it would find another perfect love like it did with her."

Gillian patted my hand. "And it has." She winked at me, before shoving past to get to the car. "Hurry up, you can help me pick out some baubles for my Lizbet on the flight over. Help me take my mind off the fact we're going back into that muddy arctic."

I closed the box, tucked it into my jeans and followed the woman. "Is there a marriage on the horizon for you? The detective and the leprechaun?"

Gillian flipped me off. "I'm eight feet too tall to be a leprechaun, and no. No marriage right now, but I would like to get her something shiny. Do they make handcuffs made out of diamonds?"

I rolled my eyes, shoving her into the backseat of the car. "You're impossible."

The second I sat next to her, tuning out Gillian rambling about diamond encrusted Tasers, and looked at the ring. I had asked my mother to send it a week ago, after having it taken to the family jeweler clean it and resized to fit Bo's finger. Another win for the detective in her snooping skills, that and she just looked on the wardrobe departments costume inventory. Either way, I had Bo's perfect fit. Now if I could get Bo's perfect answer.


	25. Chapter 25

**N: this is all Bo POV. So enjoy, and what not. Some aspects of this plot twist is basically me also working through the lingering aftermath of my accident, and how i've mentally continue working through it. Anyway, this story is coming to the end in a few more chapters, i think. Who knows, but read and enjoy!**

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"I'm very close to asking for your resignation." I mumbled the words through the heavy scarf around my neck. I glanced at Effy as she drove through the muddy one lane road, taking me to who knows where. We landed in Scotland an hour ago, Effy giving me some reason that we had to meet the sound team on location to re-record some of my dialogue. Something that apparently couldn't be done in a warm studio, it had to be done up on a hill to catch the wind. I knew it was bullshit, but went with it. I had a flight out to England that night, where I would end up at Lauren's home in Nottingham. We were meeting there since it was a safe place and we could talk freely without worrying who was around. I wanted to talk to her after watching her interviews over and over, every night before I fell asleep. It was monumental to me that Lauren took that huge leap and told the world I was hers. It made me nervous that first night I watched them, the panic at the fame that would follow sinking in quickly. But then I would talk about it with my therapist, and she pointed out that it was Lauren's own way of healing, and strengthening herself to be stronger for me. She was proving to me that all of her promises would be fulfilled. She would never let anything bad ever happen to me ever again.

"My contract doesn't allow for resignations, only terminations." Effy winked at me. "You're just going to have to fire me, Bo." She reached over, turning up the heat. "This will only take a few minutes, then it's off to Nottingham." She grinned. "Trust me this will be worth bundling up."

I shook my head, pulling my knit cap closer around my ears. "I've spent a month in a warm paradise, nothing is worth traveling back to the cold of Scotland. No matter how beautiful this country is." I turned to look out the window, the greens mingling with the light dusting of snow, painting a calming scene for me. I allowed myself to zone out, like my new therapist taught me, and absorb the pieces of beauty I saw. It helped to chase out the anxiety and fear, replacing it all with memories I could call upon whenever that damn fog threatened me. "Lauren's going to worry if we're late."

Effy reached over, patting my shoulder. "She's been notified about this minor derailment. She was the one who wanted the list of re-recordings done. The woman is a perfectionist and hates relying on digital alterations when she can easily throw an actor back outside and do it right."

I smiled thinking about Lauren. I had missed her incredibly, but was focusing on healing before I rushed back into her arms. It was what I had to do, for her. I couldn't go back to her while the fog of my accident lingered. Threatening us whenever it wanted. I had to learn how to manage my fear, especially when the cameras were turned my way. If I didn't, I couldn't be the strong woman she deserved to stand at her side as we continued in this life. Yes, I only had a handful of therapy sessions, but everything always circled back to Lauren in those sessions. She was my strength, my foundation, my drive, my passion, and the one thing that I knew I would want in the future. Each time my therapist asked what I saw in the coming years, it always landed on Lauren and I, together. And that was had me pushing through my fog and increasing the communication between Lauren and I. I never stopped loving her, I just was drowning in my PTSD, missing her as the lighthouse silently guiding me back. I grinned to myself, I had a lot of work left to do, but I loved her. Every time I said it, thought it, it made my heart skip.

Letting out a soft sigh, I dug my hand into the deep pocket of the winter coat Effy thrust on me the second we landed in Scotland. The small box had arrived just as I was walking out of my villa to meet her at the car. I barely got in a peek at the ring I designed that first week I landed in France. Call it a bold stroke of hope, but the engagement ring was me manifesting my relationship with Lauren. It didn't matter that at that moment I sent the design off, she was still hiding from me, I knew in the bottom of my heart, I would marry her. The ring arriving today, it was another sign that she was my inevitable. Nothing could keep me from her. Not a stupid past full of shotgun marriages, horrifying car accidents, and breaking her heart twice, could keep us apart. She proved that herself, slapping on a small animal on her face and breaking all the rules to sneak on to set. I laughed lightly, remembering that stupid disguise she wore. It was remarkable anyone believed her, and yet it did something to my soul. Lauren effectively handed me back the broken parts of my soul that night, offering me the tools and undying love to put them back where they belonged.

I smiled, tucking my chin into the scarf. I had no idea how to propose to her, when I would do it, or if she would even say yes. I only knew I was going to do it, I had to do it. I had to promise her that even though I was still on shaky ground, I was healing and she was my endgame. Running my fingers along the edge of the box, I broke out of my thoughts as the car came to a stop. "Is this it?" Leaning forward I looked out the front windshield, vaguely remembering this place from a location scouting trip I took that first week we all were here.

"It tis." Effy slapped the car into park, and looked at me. "Out you get, Bo."

I gave her a strange look. "Excuse me?" I motioned to the hill, the sun rising up and soaking into the vivid green and whites around us. It was beautiful, but I didn't see a crew, nor anyone else. "You're coming with me, right?"

Effy smirked. "No, I'm not. That wasn't part of my orders." She dug into her pocket, removing a small piece of paper, pointing at the bulletin points. "See here? Get Bo to the airport. Get Bo to Scotland. Get Bo to hilltop. Kick Bo out of the car and wait for her." She squinted at the bottom. "Oh, make sure Bo is bundled up and very warm." She grinned, flicking the paper with a finger. "Orders followed to a tee."

I frowned, heaving an irritated sigh. "What is this? Seriously, Effy." I snatched the paper out of her hand. It was an official studio memo signed by Lauren and Roger. "For shit's sake, can you tell me what this really is about? This feels like a screwed up scavenger hunt." I read over the page, trying to find a chink in these so-called orders.

Effy delicately removed the page from my hand, replacing it with a fresh crisp one. "And here are your orders. It's best you follow them to a tee, or you're flight to Nottingham will be delayed." She cocked an eyebrow my way. "I don't want to be late, they're showing the Queen's jubilee live, and I do not want to miss it."

I glared at her. "When we're back in a warm place, you need to explain your Queen, royal family obsession." I turned to the page in my hand, frowning deeper. "Really? Bo walk to the top of the hill. Bo look north at the mountains. Bo wait five minutes, a crew will meet you. What is this? Are you and Gillian that bored, you have to pull really elaborate pranks?" I crammed the page into the cup holder. "Lauren know about this?"

Effy gave her patented detective look. "She signed off on it." She huffed, exiting the car and walking to my side to open the door. A brisk, cold wind rammed into the car, making us both gasp. "I'll walk you to the top of the hill. That's all the orders I'm going to break." She held out a gloved hand. "We need to hurry, my bones are already shriveling from this painful chill."

I groaned, taking her hand and stepped out of the car. "Fine." I shivered under fifteen layers. "Was it this cold when we were here?" I buried my face as far as I could in the scarf.

Effy did the same and nodded, taking the first few steps up the hill. I followed, keeping my hands deep into the warmth of coat pockets. This was ridiculous. I would have to question why Lauren had to do ADR like this, and not in a digital studio.

After slogging up the hill, Effy turned to face me. Her nose was bright red as she squinted against the bright sun. "Okay. I'm going back to the car." She nodded curtly, and rushed back down the hill.

I rolled my eyes and climbed that last few steps to stand at the top. Even though it was bitterly cold, the view was indescribably beautiful. The sun was gracing the land with strokes of bold light, making me forget for a second how god damn cold I was. Cold and irritated. I stomped my feet, trying to generate more heat, and looked to the north.

"I'm second guessing this idea of mine. I had no idea it would be this cold."

I spun around at the sound of Lauren's voice appearing in the wind. She walked towards me, huddled in coats. She looked incredible with her red cheeks, and nervous smile. I bit my bottom lip, it had been almost a week since I saw her. She looked different, or maybe it was because I was looking at her with a new sense of self, either way, she was gorgeous. "You signed off on these orders." I held up the crinkled piece of paper. "That are bullshit orders." I tucked my hand back in my pocket, clutching the ring box. "Are you going to finally tell me why I'm here?" I motioned back down the hill. "And why Effy is acting as strange as her girlfriend?"

Lauren grinned, walking towards me, lifting her hands up to my face. She pulled me closer, kissing me tenderly. I melted into her, closing my eyes as I reveled in the feeling of kissing this woman. She parted too soon for my liking, licking her lips. "I had to do that first." She dropped her hands from my face, and tucking them back into her own warm pockets. "You remember this place?" She looked out onto the horizon, squinting against the sunlight.

I nodded, staring at her instead of silly hills. "Vaguely. I think we came here on a location scouting trip."

Lauren nodded, grinning. "And it was the same place that picture I carry in my notebook was taken." She met my eyes. "It was here that I fell uncontrollably in love with you at second first sight." She tipped her head down. "I created this elaborate, yet cheesy, plan to bring you here, Bo. I wanted to start here."

She drifted off, her voice trembling with nerves. I moved closer to her, my hand sweating as I held that box. "Start what?" I swallowed hard, something in the air was telling me something. That Lauren was about to do something way out of her comfort zone.

Lauren took a slow breath, and pulled her hand from a pocket. She opened her hand and revealed a small black box in the palm of her hand. "I know you're still working on getting healthy, and our schedules are nowhere near matching up, and this is possibly the most spontaneous, stupid thing I've ever done, but." She took in another breath. "Bo, I love you. Will love you for the rest of my life and probably into the next one, and I…" She went to open the box, when my hands shot and covered hers in both of mine.

"Lauren, please don't tell me you brought me all the way up here to propose to me." I stared at her wide eyed, my heart thundering in my chest.

Lauren's eyes went wide as the cliffs next to us. "Um…I…uh." She was starting to panic. "Bo." She dipped her head down, looking at my hands. "This was a stupid idea." She mumbled the words out, and went to pull her hand free.

I clutched her hands tighter, preventing her escape. "I vaguely remember asking you to marry me a few weeks back. You told me to ask _you_ again in three weeks." I cocked an eyebrow as she looked up at me confused, and mildly devastated.

"I guess." She turned to look back out on the horizon. "This was stupid. I know you're not in the right mind frame and I'm being pushy." She shook her head, she furrowed her brow. "Let's get to a warm car."

I chuckled at the adorable look on her face. This woman was tenacious when it came to me, and I adored it. I let go of her hand, going into my pocket for the ring. "I'm not completely in the right mind frame, but truth be told, choosing to be an actress is not a choice made in sound mind." I smiled as Lauren held her grumpy face. "I have a lot of healing to do, from the accident, from my past life as a movie star. But there's one thing that has stood out in these last few months since we came back to each other."

I picked up Lauren's left hand. "And it's always been you, Lauren. My heart refused to let me walk away from you, akways circling back to you like a boomerang." I paused, waiting for Lauren to look at me. "You triggered something between us seven years ago, and it's been a game of cat and mouse for us, playing with destiny. Doing our damndest to prove it wrong, when it was right the entire time." I tugged at the thin gloves I wore, dropping them to the ground as I held out the ring box in my right hand. "You're not being pushy, Lauren. Furthest from it, but I asked you first and I'm asking you now." I flicked the lid open, revealing the understated, yet intricate ring I had made for her. "Will you marry me?"

Lauren's grumpy face dissipated into one of utter shock. "What?"

I plucked the ring out of the box and held it up. "You heard me, you always hear me." I smiled as she gave me a dirty look. "I designed this ring after us, our story." I ran a finger over the weaving knots. "This is our paths always crossing, tangling together before breaking away, but never apart." I pointed out the tiny thistle flowers. "This is for Scotland. The frozen land that brought us together, and lastly." I pointed out the inset diamonds in each thistle. "Diamonds. The strongest stone in the world." I met Lauren's eyes, brimming with tears. "So, will you marry me, Lauren Lewis?"

She let out a happy sob. "This isn't fair, Bo."

I gave her a confused look. "Fair?"

She nodded, lacing her fingers in mine. "I was going to propose to you, and you made me feel like I had screwed up big time." She let out a slow breath. "Are you really asking me to marry you?" She looked up, a lone tear slipping down her cheek.

"If you're willing to spend the rest of your life with a gay divorcee. Who suffers from an irrational fear of fame, and will probably in a year, be back in the Midwest teaching drama at the senior center due to said fear." I pressed my palm against her warm skin. "Yes, I'm really asking you to marry me, Lauren. The love I feel for you is the only thing that makes perfect sense to me, no matter what my thoughts want me to think." I grinned as she smiled sheepishly. "I love you, Lauren."

"I love you, Bo." She whispered the words out. "Yes." Her face split into a shit eating grin. "Yes, I will marry you." I burst out in nervous laughter and grabbed her face, kissing her. I felt her smile against my mouth, and I felt the power our love truly had.

I took her shaking left hand, and slid the ring on, kissing her once more when it was settled at the base of her finger. I let out a puff of air that the ring fit perfectly. Lauren held her hand up to the sun, grinning with tears streaked cheeks. "It's unbelievable, Bo. Perfect."

I nodded, shoving frozen hands into my pockets as the chill returned. My adrenaline fading away a little too fast. "You're perfect, and as much as this moment is perfect. Can we please go find Effy and that really warm car?"

Lauren laughed, bending down to pick up my gloves. "Yes." She winked at me. "I'll race you down the hill?" I heard in her voice how excited, and happy she was.

I half smiled. "Race?" Lauren was giddy like a hyper little kid. I loved that I had this effect on her. That I was the one who pulled out the many sides of the girl from Boston. All of them I loved more and more as she revealed them to me.

Lauren nodded, taking a few steps back and holding out her hands. "Yup. Race me down the hill, if I win, you have to let me propose to you wherever, whenever." She patted her pocket. "I also have a ring for you, and have this amazing proposal I spent days writing." She looked up at the blue sky. "It's quite possibly my best writing, even Gillian shed a single honest tear. She only cries when she chips her French manicure. Hmm, maybe I'll save it for a film."

I shook my head as I stepped towards the woman. My heart was bouncing at the idea of Lauren getting down on one knee and proposing to me. We were just traditionally engaged in the sense of the word, but who cared about tradition. Nothing about Lauren and I screamed tradition. "What if I win?" I started moving quicker. "Do I get to choose when and where we get married?"

Lauren scrunched her face up, thinking about it. "Okay, that's fair." She winked at me and broke out into a full run, shouting over her shoulder. "But you won't!"

It took me a minute to chase after her, determined to beat her, but as we reached the car Effy left for us, I slowed down. I wanted Lauren to win, I was going to marry her either way. Plus I secretly needed to hear this proposal that made Gillian cry.

I slowed to a trot as Lauren opened the passenger side door, gasping for air. "I won."

I nodded, sliding into the car and pulling her into me so I could kiss her. "We both did." I motioned for her to get into the warm car. "Get in, we have a flight to catch."

Lauren kissed me back, closed my door and ran to the driver's side. "We do." She glanced at me as she put the car in reverse. "Tonight, we stay in Nottingham and then first thing in the morning, we leave for the states." She smiled, nervously. "I'm making a quick stop in Boston before I meet you and the wonder twins in California." She hesitated for a moment. "You can come with me, or go straight to California. I know you have to clean out your apartment, and look at a few open houses."

I felt a wave of panic start to ebb, but after taking a deep calming breath, I forced it back. "I probably should meet your mother, now that I've asked her daughter to be my wife." I looked down at the ring on her finger. "Those open houses can wait, until we both decide where we want to live." I picked up her hand, linking our fingers together. "And it would be healing to make good memories in Boston, replace the ugly ones I left there."

Lauren lifted our hands up, kissing the top of mine. "I agree, but tell me if it's too much. I can rearrange everything. Shit, I'll even cancel the press junket."

I chuckled, squeezing her hand. "Don't cancel it on my behalf. I love nothing more than sitting in a hotel conference room for three days. Repeating over and over like a broken record about my character's motivation and what it was like to share love scenes with the sexpot Gillian Harris."

Lauren laughed. "Tell them it was the most disgusting experience ofyour life."

"And have your maid of honor throttle me in public? I think not." I leaned back into the seat, looking out the window as Lauren drove us back down the hill. "Can we come back here when it's warmer? I'd like to enjoy the country that gave me my love back."

"Anything for you, my love."


	26. Chapter 26

**N: i dunno, this is a rambling one that goes nowhere. So read on and enjoy! If you're new to me! Go check out Sydney Gibson on Amazon! I have books up there that are free to read if you're a kindle unlimited member! Plus some of the books will keep you occupied as i'm slow to update and get a new book done! Thank you all for sticking with me!**

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"Lauren Lewis, spotted in Boston with her lady love last week, Bo Dennis. Both looked smitten in love, as they grab a slice at a local pizza joint." Gillian read aloud the article as we walked. She nudged me, laughing. "Look, they've even circled your marrying finger. Marriage on the horizon?" She shook her head, rapidly flipping a few more pages. "Still can't believe Bo beat you at your own game."

I shrugged, twirling the set of keys Bo gave me. "It happened. Now I have to write an incredible proposal speech." I grinned at the memory of Bo proposing to me a few days back. I ran my thumb over the ring on my finger. "A seriously incredible proposal." I mumbled the words out.

Gillian laughed even harder. "You're an idiot when you're in love. Why did you tell a fib to your future wife? You could've told her that all you had planned was to slip the ring on and pray to hell she wouldn't lose her mind." She tossed the magazine in a trashcan, looking up towards the sun. "California sun is very different than French sun. It feels nosier, aggressive, and angry."

I laughed, shaking my head. "You just miss being lazy in France."

Gillian sighed. "Agreed. I hate auditions, and auditioning in California."

All of us were back in California after taking a short trip to Boston. Bo met my mother and was immediately adopted into my family. It was meant to be a two-day trip, that ended up being a week as my mother refused to let me jet in and jet out. So, we stayed. I showed Bo around my neighborhood, took her to all the embarrassing places I grew up, and bought her dinner at the old pizza place I used to work at. For most of the trip, we were left alone. A handful of people recognized me as we walked around the city, and photographers waited at the airport terminals, taking the pictures Gillian flipped through. But aside from that, Bo and I were almost free of public scrutiny. Which was great for Bo, who was still working on her past experiences and dealing with the new spotlight pointed her way. I smiled, looking down at the pizza logo on my shirt. Bo and I were finding that as long as we had each other, we could tune out the world and live happily. It was a thought my mother brought up when she watched us from afar. Bo latched onto it, and it seemed to helping her as we flew back to California. Where the press was eagerly awaiting in swarms for us.

I looked up, pointing at the cheesy metal gate ahead. "This is her building." I glanced at Gillian, smirking. "You love auditioning, and this new movie would be great for you. A modern story for once, no elaborate costumes for you to complain about." I poked her arm. "What is it for real? The look on your face tells me a million different things."

The redhead pushed the gate open, frowning at the rundown apartment building Bo lived in. "Why does it look so greasy?" She pushed her sunglasses up. "It's like a million filthy hands have molested this poor building."

I laughed, shoving her forward. "That's because a million different hands have touched this building." I pushed my own sunglasses up. "You're evading, you never evade things." I pulled my friend towards the staircase, remembering the directions Bo gave me to get to her apartment. "I can try to pry it out of Effy, but she's with Bo on that silly entertainment show interview." I offered Gillian and I's services to get started on packing up Bo's old apartment while she did a few interviews for the movie she was working on. I wanted to go, be Bo's support, but opted to send Effy instead.

Gillian huffed, folding her arms over the same pizza place shirt I gave her as a gift. "It's simple, Lauren. This new movie would start in three weeks, taking me back to England for months on end." She paused, looking at me. "Lizbet will be in Venice with Bo, and I won't be able to see her as much as I'd like." She threw her hands up in defeat. "I'm going to miss my girlfriend and that's the prime reason why I don't want to audition. I'll audition, get the role, and be off to the motherland. Alone." She groaned. "I'm in love, aren't I? Hopelessly beyond help in love. There's no rescue from this, I'm in love with your assistant." Gillian grinned like an idiot. "I'm in love and I love it."

I laughed, patting her shoulder. "You are, and I'm sure you can talk to your girlfriend's employer and arrange a few set visits." I looked up, stopping at a door, before pulling out Bo's keys.

"Her boss is your betrothed. She better let me have my detective time, or I'm going to punch in the arse." Gillian, frowned. "Can I quit acting and work at your pizza place? Then fire Lizbet to come work with me? Her and I could live a simple life in Boston as pizza dealers."

"I don't think they'd hire you, Gilly." I shoved the key in, unlocked the door and shoved it open.

"You own the pizza place, Lauren! Can't you bribe them? Or write me a reference letter?" Gillian cringed as she looked inside the front door. "Good lord, this is barely the size of my bathroom in Ireland."

I shook my head, walking inside. "Your bathroom in that house is the size of a small town." I set the keys down, moving around the stack of boxes Bo's landlord brought up for us. "And no, I won't bribe them. I may own the building and be a silent partner, but it's still Carlo's. I won't ask him to hire a diva who would complain every minute of every hour." I pointed at the boxes. "Grab a few, Bo said to start in the living room until she got here."

Gillian grumbled behind me, picking up the boxes. "You're no fun."

I ignored my friend, walking around the very small apartment Bo had lived in since her slow descent from stardom. The apartment was dingy, tiny, and had that over lived in look. It reminded me an awful lot like my first apartment in the building seven blocks down. I smiled softly at Bo's attempts to make the apartment look more of a home. There was a large bookshelf next to the old couch, packed full of books and a few worn screenplays. There were pictures on the walls of family, costars, and all the places Bo had traveled. I moved past the couch, chuckling at the sounds of Gillian fumbling with a tape gun behind me. I reached for a few books on the shelf. "Hurry, I want to get most of this packed up today. I've arranged the movers to come tomorrow and ship this all back to Nottingham."

Gillian threw an empty box at me. "Moving on up to the east side, isn't she?" The red head started humming the Jeffersons theme as she stepped around a wobbly side table.

I rolled my eyes, grabbing the box to fill up. "It's temporary until we figure out what's next. After the press junket for Blitz, she's back to Venice for a few more weeks. I have a meeting with the studio about my next script, and one they want me to direct." I picked up another load of books. "Award season is creeping up, and that'll take us through the holidays."

"And your thoughts away from making permanent decisions." Gillian cocked an eyebrow my way as she flipped through an old screenplay for the Spielberg movie. "Shame she didn't get this role, it could've made that movie bearable."

"I'm not avoiding permanent decisions. I'm leaving the door open for Bo to make them with me. I can't push, I won't push her. We're equals." I waved my hand at her. "Are you going to help?"

Gillian stuck her tongue out at me, dropping the screenplay in the box. She picked up another one and flopped down on the couch, coughing dramatically at the puff of dust filling the air. "No, I prefer to watch." She winked, flipping through pages. "All of the interesting things are probably hidden in her bedroom, so I'll wait until we get that far."

"Thanks." I turned my back on her, focusing on getting the bookshelf packed up. "You're always so helpful."

"I did match make you and Bo, so you're welcome." She crossed her legs, "Hmm, Lauren, this is one of your scripts. Bo's written little notes along the margins."

I turned to Gillian leaning forward on the couch. I caught the familiar font of I used for my screenplays after my first academy award win. "That's Cold Water's Edge." I dropped the few paperbacks in my hand, and sat next to Gillian, coughing again from the dust I riled up. "What are the notes."

"It looks like acting notes. Character tone, thoughts, and she's crossed out some of the dialogue." Gillian pointed at Bo's handwriting. "Here, it's the amount of times she called her agent about this role. Fifteen times. Jesus."

I leaned over, reading the notes. "I never saw her name on any of my lists. Or on any of the open auditions." I read Bo noting how many times she emailed my studio, only getting a standard response of we've sent your request forward to the producers. "Why didn't her agent ever call us?" I felt a pang of regret. I still had a broken heart when I made that movie, but I knew if I saw Bo then, I would've cast her in the movie. I would've given her another chance.

Gillian flipped through pages until she reached the back. "Ah, here we go. Seems she shared an agent with Devon the douche." She pulled out her phone, tapping away before holding out the screen. "And those two were tight as bed bugs in a brothel. When Cold Water was in production, Bo was filing for her third divorce request. I guarantee those idiots prevented her from ever getting close to you." She motioned to the bottom of the bookshelf. "Considering she has a tiny notebook labelled Lewis at the bottom there. I bet Devon was jealous of your hold on the woman he married." Gillian patted my arm, when I cringed. "Old history, Lauren. Anytime you doubt Bo, look at the ring on your finger. That will always bring you home." The red head slid off the couch, moving to the bookshelf to collect the small notebook she spotted. She opened it, grinning. "Ah yes, our dear Bo was keeping tabs on you. Always trying to find her way back to you." She tossed the notebook onto my lap. "It's adorable reading."

I shook my head, picking up the small notebook. "It's private."

"It's a schedule of all your open auditions, anything you were involved with and her attempts to send you an email. The girl was chasing you for years." She patted her chest. "Makes my love filled heart flutter at the pure romance."

I flipped my friend off, and went through a few pages. Gillian was right, it was not a diary or a journal, it was Bo's strategy to find me again. She had listed all of public appearences, the open casting calls, and my studio contacts. I would've thought it was Bo's way of latching on to my coat tails of fame, until I read on one page. "I have to find Lauren, tell her the truth about the first time I met her and that it was love at first sight. I blew it at the audition last week, but have another one schedule in a month with her studio. I don't even care about acting anymore, I just care about finding the woman who stole my heart."

I grinned reading more of her notes, my head finally forming an idea for how I was going to propose to Bo. I slapped the book shut and shoved it into Gillian's purse for later. "Hey! That purse is vintage Vuitton! You don't shove things into it like it's a potato sack." Gillian shot me a dirty look, holding up her phone. "The ladies of our affection are on their way here. Bo is a little rattled, but composed."

I stood up, pulling my own phone out of my back pocket. Bo sent a few messages. I could read her tone, she was fine, but overwhelmed from sitting in a room for hours answering questions. I sent her a quick I love you text and shoved my phone away. "Let's pack up her things, forget the furniture. It all can be donated."

"Or burned in a Viking ceremony for sad furniture." Gillian mumbled, picking up an old scifi award, wiping the coat of dust off with the corner of her shirt. "Does she not clean?"

I whipped a small stuffed animal at Gillian's head. "She hasn't been home in almost six months, and unlike you, she doesn't have a staff to do the cleaning." I walked into the kitchen, found a few rags and came back into the room. "Here, dust as you pack." I pointed at the roll of bubble wrap near the door. "And be kind to breakables."

Gillian frowned, wiping off the crystal shaped award. "I haven't dusted in ten years."

I sighed heavily, ignoring Gillian's grumbling and went about packing up my fiancée's things. Smiling at how strangely normal this felt for me.

* * *

XXX

Bo

Three hours later-

I was exhausted. The day of interviews was only five hours long, but it felt like a lifetime. I repeated the same droll speech about the new film, answered questions about Blitzkrieg and glossed over my relationship with Lauren. Most of the journalists there were kind in their requests, and I answered as best as I wanted, but it was hard. Hard to discuss the love of my life like she was an object, not the love of my life. Thank god I had Effy to look to when I wanted to avoid a question and not come off as a jerk. She would step in politely and redirect the journalist to a better topic.

"Here we are." Effy pulled the car over, leaning over me to look up at the building. "I'm dropping you off, Gillian messaged me, and begged me to meet her at the hotel. I think she's having another freak out about taking that new movie back in England." She smiled, sighing softly. "Who'd ever think the most respected and fear actress in the business, would be clingy."

I laughed, shaking my head. "You're equally as clingy about the woman." I grabbed my purse. "I saw the look on your face when I was asked how I manage a long distance relationship. Lauren in England and I soon to be in Venice." I pushed the door open, frowning as the gross heavy heat of California hit me. "I can give you tips on surviving the distance. Whether it be physical or emotional." I stood up, yawning as the heat soaked into my Versace pantsuit. "I'll be so happy to change out of this."

Effy appeared next to me, handing me a plastic bag full of cherry coke bottles. "Your love requested it." She chuckled and ran off to the car.

I waved and began the very familiar walk up towards my home. I hadn't been back to this apartment since I left for England the first time, and looking at it with a different set of eyes, I was eager to move out of this dump.

I trudged up the steps, thinking over the day like my therapist taught me to. Digest the good and the bad, and focus on what I controlled and what I didn't. I was doing better with the press, only having one minor melt down in Boston when a photographer bumped into me trying to get a picture of Lauren. I barely held it together and when I hugged Lauren's mom, I fell apart. Crying like an idiot in a stranger's arms. Thankfully her mother was great about it. Sitting with me, telling me all about her awful experiences as Lauren's mother in a world that had no respect for the family. She even showed me her own scrapbook of shitty headlines that they all laughed at during the holidays. I left Boston feeling whole and that no matter what, I had a family I could go home to, even if they weren't mine.

I pushed my front door open, thinking about what it would be like when Lauren and I started our own family, and stopped at the sight before me. The entire apartment was filled with boxes. Gillian's elegant handwriting noting what was in what, and a few signs taped to my used furniture with burn it, written in heavy black marker. I laughed and looked around, noticing the smell of food in the air. I dropped my purse and walked towards the kitchen, where I found Lauren setting up plates filled with Mexican food from the place on the corner. I leaned against the doorframe. "You look very domestic in that apron."

Lauren grinned, lifting her head up as she tugged on the apron I stole from one of my coffee shop jobs. "Thanks." She tapped the pin on the top. "I didn't know you were a master barista? You're making the coffee from here on out." She walked over, placing her hands on my face and kissing me. "Hi."

I melted into her hands, leaning into her body. "Hi." I smiled as she smelled of enchiladas and that weird candle I kept in the bedroom. "How do you like my apartment? Thank you, by the way, for packing my junk up."

Lauren squeezed me closer. "You're welcome. Gillian helped until she freaked out about a cobweb and ran back to the safety of a five star hotel." She leaned back. "I can't say I love the apartment. I hated mine and it was smaller than this one." She motioned towards the window. "We were neighbors. I lived at Escanaba Villa until I moved." She stepped back. "I got us dinner and thought we could have dinner in your house one more time before we start our new lives together."

I grinned, staring at the woman I was going to marry. I'd marry her right now if I could find a priest, or an internet ordained neighbor. I scrunched my face up, wondering if the computer nerd four doors down still lived there. He always hit on me, calling me Samira, I bet I could call on him in trade for an autograph. I knew for a fact he was ordained at the Star Trek church of Shatner.

"Bo? Are you okay?" Lauren placed a hand on my elbow. "You're staring at the cracked wall."

I blinked a few times, shaking my head. "I'm fine. Just thinking." I pushed off the doorframe. "Did you pack up my clothes?"

"I left out a pair of jeans and a few shirts. The rest I think Gillian threw into a burn it into ashes box." Lauren smiled as she went back to setting up dinner.

I nodded and walked to my tiny bedroom. I was happy to leave the tiny room behind me. Regardless that I was with Lauren, I was intent on buying a larger home with my paychecks, but it was made sweeter that I was starting a life with Lauren. I quickly shucked out of the expensive pantsuit, hanging it up carefully before I slipped into old worn clothes that instantly made me relax. I went to walk out of the kitchen, when I paused. I couldn't shake the idea of marrying Lauren as soon as it was possible. I grabbed my cell phone and messaged Effy before I sifted through a few contacts and pressing call. The phone only rang twice before a very familiar voice answered.

I grinned at the sound. "Hey, I know it's been awhile, but I was wondering if you could meet me at the Regency next week. Yeah, it's that stupid press tour. Yeah, my girlfriend will be there. But that's not why I'm asking." I looked up at the water stained ceiling. "Can you ask your dad the Reverend if he'd be willing to me a huge favor?"


	27. Chapter 27

**N: super short. I've been busy with life. Taxes, work, competing in the open, and trying to fit in sleep in between all these things. Hence why the delay in updates. But this one gets them closer to the end and in a few days i will have the awkward proposal that will lead to the epilogue. Then off into the sunset to figure out what's next. Read on and enjoy~**

* * *

Lauren

My mind never understood the concept of time, hence why I was sitting in a chair next to the bed, writing in a notebook at four a.m. Bo was dead to the world next to me, burrowed in pillows and sleeping like it was her job. We were at the hotel across the street from the hotel where the press would be waiting for us in a handful of hours. Maybe that was why I couldn't sleep, the press jitters always struck the night before any large interview, and the only way out was to stay up and write.

But I was stumped writing, my mind drifting to the last few days with Bo. After packing her apartment up, and sharing one last dinner in it, we moved to the hotel. Gillian and Effy joining us for dinner and a few small road trips. Gillian made the comment that we were a clown car full of fools in love, and I couldn't help but agree. Her comment also left me frustrated that I still hadn't written Bo's perfect proposal. Leaving Bo out in the wind as the press focused on my ring finger whenever our picture was taken, shouting out questions about when our wedding would be. Bo would tuck into my side, and shield her face as I rushed us around corners.

Try as I might, I was blocked on the perfect words to say to Bo. Proposal be damned, and yet I had managed to flesh out a new script that I would start when Bo was in Venice. I also drafted up a few television scripts, a small novel I wanted to write, and doctored up the script for Gillian's new film. All that and I couldn't scrape a few paragraphs to ask the love of my life to marry me.

Rubbing my eyes, I smiled as Bo let out a sleepy snort, her left hand flopping over the edge of my side of the bed. She had fallen asleep watching an old Audrey Hepburn movie with me. The woman was worn out from the day we spent in the sun, running around up in wine country. Too much sun, and a little too much wine had Bo in the coma she was in now. After snuggling in my side, swathed in one of my old concert t-shirts, she was out like a light in the first five minutes of the movie. I shook my head, leaning forward on my knees, looking at her hand. I pictured what it would look like with my rings on it. What it would sound like to introduce her as my wife, and what our future would like. Would we have dogs? A ton of kids? Or would we just adopt Gillian to be our overgrown daughter who had a wine a day habit?

I let out a slow sigh, digging to the back of my notebook where I stuck the engagement ring earlier in the night. Hoping it would give me inspiration to write. I held the simple diamond ring in the dim light of the bedroom, smiling as I quietly slipped it on Bo's finger. I couldn't help but grin when I saw it was a perfect fit. Knowing Bo was out for the count, I held her hand and started talking to her like I often did when my mind refused to let me rest.

"I must admit, I told you a lie. I don't have the perfect, make Gillian cry, earth shattering proposal for you. You caught me off guard on that frigid hill, and now, for the first time in my life, I'm at a loss for words." I felt my heart swell with content, Bo's hand was so warm. "Even as I sit here, you dead to the world and not hearing a damn thing I'm saying, you've always caught me off guard, Bo. From the first awkward hello I issued your way, to the strange heartbreak tied to your name, through these last months, and to this exact moment. You've always caught me off guard by how much I love you, and how much you love me. Granted we fought an invisible war to reach other, but I'm glad we did."

I ran my thumb across the top of her hand, getting no reaction other than her letting out another sleepy breath. I looked at her face, peaceful and beautiful. "Why am I so stumped at the words to say to you? I tell you everything that is in my heart and soul. You can read my mood with one glance, and you always know what to say to pull my head out of my ass. You've been my first true love, Ysabeau, my first and forever. I want to ask you to marry me and have the heavens open up like my special effects team could create, and show you. Show you that I will never find another like you, ever. Nor do I really want to. Do you know how hard it is to find someone who will endure, and support, my cherry coke addiction?" I shook my head, reaching for the ring to pull it back off and tuck it away. "I have no idea why I'm so stuck on how to ask you one simple question. Will you marry me, Bo? Be my wife, my partner, my best friend and forever cherry coke dealer?" I mumbled the last few words out as I wiggled the ring from the base of her finger.

As I inched the ring closer, Bo's hand suddenly closed around mine, ceasing my movements. I looked up, two sleepy brown eyes met mine. "Yes." Bo rasped the word out, her voice heavy from having just woken up.

I cocked my head to the side, my heart pounding in nerves. Bo never heard anything I said to her when she was in a deep sleep. "Um, yes what?" I cleared my throat, looking down at her hand. "I, uh, was working on a script."

"No, you weren't. I heard everything you said from the second you slipped a really cold ring on my hand, waking me up." Bo shifted so she was sitting up, pulling me closer. She grinned as she looked at the ring on her finger. "You don't need to write the perfect proposal, Lauren. Everything you just said was perfect. Beyond perfect." She glanced up. "And my answer is yes. Yes, I will marry you. I would marry you a thousand times over if I could." Bo lifted our hands to kiss them gently, as my heart swelled. It didn't matter that I had already said yes to Bo, asking someone to marry you was scary business. Having her say yes without hesitation, filled me with a sense of being complete, that I wanted to take on the world at four a.m. I was lost in my racing thoughts, that I had to blink to focus on Bo as she spoke again, her voice still raspy and low. "You catch me off guard every day too. In all the best ways, and I would never go back in time to change a damn thing about the road we both took to get here." She reached down, pushing the ring back into place. "This ring is beautiful."

"It was my grandmother's. I had it resized to fit you. I figured since she was the one who guided me back to you, that she would approve of you having this ring. Filling it with love once more." I sighed happily, leaning forward to kiss Bo softly. "You really want to marry me? I mean we're destined to bicker, argue about things when I get consumed in work. Can you handle grumpy me when we're separated by our silly jobs playing pretend?" I smirked as Bo rolled her eyes, yanking me into the bed to lay on top of her.

She cradled my face with both of her hands. "I'll take anything and everything that comes my way. Even your sickening addiction to cherry coke, as long as I get to wake up in the morning knowing you're my wife, Lauren." She smiled, running her thumb across my cheek. "I love you, Lauren Lewis, and I want nothing more in this life than to marry you." She kissed the bottom of my chin, pulling me to lay against her chest. Her heart was racing as I laid in my favorite spot. "It only beats for you, Lauren. From the first time we locked eyes in a crowded convention center, to a minute ago, watching you fidget and mumble over your words." She sighed, squeezing me tight. "My heart is yours."

I grinned like a silly kid, closing my eyes. "And mine is yours, my elephant."

Bo chuckled, yawning. "I would poke you about calling me an elephant, but I'm so tired, I'll save it for later." She kissed the top of my head. "I can't wait for Gillian to find out how you proposed to me."

I shook my head, pulling the blankets over us. "I can. She'll laugh until she cries, making fun of how on earth could anyone propose to their love while they sleep."

Bo laughed. "Well, at least there will be tears and your lie will become a truth." She scooted into my side. "Just hope when she asks Effy to marry her, that it will be utterly awkward, and embarrassing."

I shook my head, closing my eyes and soaking up Bo's warmth. "I don't even want to think of that day. An embarrassed Gilly is a dangerous Gilly." I took in a deep breath, my mind finally slowing down. "I wish we could get married tomorrow."

Bo squeezed me, murmuring in a sleepy breath. "Sometimes wishes come true, Lauren." She took one more deep breath in and fell asleep. Leaving me wondering what she meant.

* * *

XXXX

Bo

"Could this day get any more…overwhelming?" I stood near a window, looking out over the hazy morning sky that was Hollywood. I peered at Effy hovering over her laptop, talking on her cellphone with a backup in her hand, texting away. Effy gave me a huge grin, shrugging as she spoke to a thousand other news outlets that wanted an exclusive with me. I had woken up to Lauren's serious face as she scrolled through emails, casually telling me that I had been nominated for a Golden Globe award for best actress. I felt my heart stop as she handed me the laptop to read the email listing all the films nominations. I had thought the film was months away from being finished, as I was caught up in the drama of my own life. But as Lauren explained, she had sent off the film the day before I proposed to her on that hill, and it quickly made the circuit. The film overall, was nominated eight times in varying categories. Gillian and I for best actress, Wynn for best actor, and of course Lauren for best director. I was already overwhelmed having to sit for an entire weekend doing interviews, add on a serious award nomination, and I wanted to run for the hills.

I stepped away from the window, Effy finally off all her devices. "Why do I feel like I'm in a dream?"

Effy laughed. "You're not, my dear, you're in a glorious reality." She handed me a bottle of water. "I know you're in a state, but be happy. Lauren is next door with my girlfriend grumbling about how she hates the world, the media, and wants to quit the film business to be a delivery girl again." She grinned wider. "I just spoke to Reverend Paul, he's been injected into the lineup after lunch. Lauren will be more agreeable after she's eaten lunch."

I blew out a nervous breath, picking at the edge of my very expensive dress. "This isn't a good idea. I should not do this." I closed my eyes, taking a sip of water. "Lauren is going to lose her damn mind when she realizes that an interview is actually our wedding." I shook my head, clutching onto the cameo around my neck. "Would you judge me if I told you I'm so nervous, I don't know if I'm going to vomit, or…"

"Don't finish that sentence and I won't judge you." Effy grabbed my arms. "Everything will be fine. I have the rings in my pocket, and have told Gillian to show up for that "interview" with your friend Will." She winked at me. "And no Gillian has no idea what's about to happen, I kept that secret locked up when you called me yesterday morning with this magnificent plan."

I smiled as Effy picked up my left hand. "Is it stupid of me? Irrational in my lack of patience?"

"Not at all. After you told me how she proposed to you, I shed a tear. When I told Gillian, she sniffled once. Which is impressive for her. I only made her cry once and that's when I…" Effy paused her face turning red. "Um, that's better left for another time. Or never a time." She cleared her throat. "Your love for Lauren is remarkable, and I'm forever thankful I got to witness the evolution of this love story." She winked at me as the adjoining door opened, Lauren rushing in, still grumbling with Gillian on her heels.

I blew out another breath, my nerves rising at the sight of the woman I was about to marry in the next few hours. "I pray to god this all works out." I nodded to Effy as Lauren walked over to me, a frown deeply embedded on her face.

"The press is already annoying me. Please don't be upset when asshole Lauren comes out in some interviews." She looked over me, her frown easing as she saw my dress. "God, you look incredible." She ran a hand down my arm, before grabbing my hand. "How are you? I know this morning's news added a new level to this whole weekend." She squeezed my hand. "Effy has your friend Will coming up for lunch with us, let me know if you want to take an earlier lunch. We can shuck off a few journalists and issue them statements later." I adored her concern for me, it eased my crazy notion of marrying her today.

I nodded, looking at the grey and pink pantsuit she wore. Hugging all of her curves in a way that had me licking my lips. "I'm good. I'm okay." I sighed heavy. "I'm stressed the hell out, want to cry, scream with joy, and at the same time, run back to the Midwest and hide in a cornfield." I chuckled at the look on Lauren's face, leaning over to kiss her softly. "I'm still I shock that I've been nominated."

Gillian appeared next to Lauren. "Oh my lovely Bo, it's only the beginning. Roger and the other studio nitwits have heard you're going to be nominated for the big golden boy, and trounce all over my two-year winning streak." She winked at me, holding out her hand for me to shake. I gave her a confused look as she rolled her eyes, slapping me on the shoulder. "Let the games begin, Bo. You'll be my favorite competition this awards season."

I laughed, shaking my head as Lauren playfully punched the redhead. "Go stand over there."

Gillian held up her hands and shuffled back to Effy, who pulled her to sit down next to her and help with a few more emails.

"Bo, it's a few hours and I'll be next you for most of it. It'll get repetitive and there are a couple journalists who are fun." Lauren ran her finger over my engagement ring. "I wish we could get married in Venice, the day you go back. Then we can honeymoon in Italy, or head back to the south of France for a few days."

I lifted our hands, kissing her knuckles. "As do I, but it was your mother who threatened motherly revenge if we didn't have a proper wedding." I swallowed hard at the white lie. Lauren's mother knew exactly what I was doing. I had called her after I called Will to bring his Reverend father to the junket, asking for her permission to marry her daughter. Her mother eagerly gave permission, saying Lauren would be one miserable bridezilla if she had to plan and go through a traditional ceremony. All she asked was that we stopped back in Boston on the way to Venice for a family dinner. I had quickly come to learn that unusual was the norm for the Lewis family.

"I don't understand why she's pushing it, she knows I hate traditional." Lauren grumbled as she looked over her shoulder at the hotel room door opening. A hotel concierge stuck her head in, asking if we were ready to get started.

Gillian hopped up from her seat, running her hands through perfect hair, sauntering over to the door. "Let's get this over with." She grabbed Effy's hand and called after us. "Move it lovebirds, or we'll be here until the Queen's next jubilee."

I shook my head, stepping away from Lauren. "Why are those two so infatuated with the Queen?" I glanced at the woman, watching her face shift into the public persona she always put on for interviews.

"That's a mystery we may never solve, Bo." She smiled at me. "Before this starts, I love you, Bo. No one can question that, or will question it. Don't let them question it either, or twist it." She kissed me on the cheek. "If I get pissed off four times, we're leaving and never coming back. I wrote the waiver they all signed to be here today."

I laughed as we stepped into the hallway, secretly hoping no one would piss Lauren off until Will and his father got their turn.


	28. Chapter 28

**N: short one. I didn't have internet for a few days, delaying me posting this. The rest of this story will be up soon. I've a busy week next week and have to split my time on real life things and getting the angel edits done. I haven't forgotten about this story, just ran out of time and contrary to a few anons out there, this story will be completed. And sadly, i won't be sticking with fanfiction forever. I will dabble when the mood hits me, but writing original stories has given me a ton more freedom with characters. Enjoy this little bit and have a great holiday!**

* * *

"Effy, do you have any whiskey I can dump into my cherry coke?" I looked at my assistant, frowning as she shook her head no. "Can you get me some before I lost my mind?" I stood up, stretching as a journalist was getting a few more notes from Bo. Effy moved to hand me a glass of water.

"I can head to the bar downstairs, if it's that urgent." She cocked an eyebrow, sensing my tension. "We have one more before lunch. The rest after lunch will be warned to keep their questions limited to the movie unless you or Bo bring up the relationship." She glanced at the notebook in her hands, "You're doing well. You only yelled at two reporters, neither will bother to print your colorful comments. They signed non-disclosure waivers on the way in." She smirked, looking back up at me. "Still want that whiskey?"

I nodded, looking over at Bo. "Yes. Very much so." I let out a slow breath as Bo waved at me, saying goodbye to the journalist. She had done well throughout the interviews. She avoided most of the prodding and would bounce questions back to Gillian or I, to take if it got too personal. I smiled back at Bo, feeling my tension ease. The more we spoke about the film, and answered a few questions about our relationship, I became sappy about how much I loved that woman and couldn't wait to marry her. "Effy, can you check Bo's schedule in Venice. See if there's a weekend in the very near future and a church, or some sort of officiant, nearby willing to marry us?"

Effy chuckled, digging through her phone. "Patience is a virtue, Lauren." She swiped a few times, frowning. "Bo isn't free until two weeks from now, and you'll be in Los Angeles to meet with Roger about that new script of yours." She held up the very packed calendar. "Marriage may have to wait."

"What about tonight?" I waved her off when her eyes bugged out. "I'm kidding. I'm just tired, cranky, and really want to be on vacation." I paused, making eye contact with Bo as she came towards. "And I really want to call that woman my wife."

I heard Effy coo at the back of my head, before she whispered she'd be right back with my whiskey. I gave her a dirty look, and smiled as Bo grabbed my hand. "Gillian took a bathroom break, which I think means she's downstairs having a glass of wine." Bo smiled, squeezing my hand. Something she did when she was nervous.

I pulled her closer. "Are you okay? You seem nervous? We can call lunch now, and go have a glass of wine."

She shook her head, "It's fine. It's good. I'm good." She cleared her throat, taking a step away from me as there was a knock at the door. Bo let go of my hand and rushed to the door. She was definitely nervous, or up to something. She had mentioned she had a little surprise for me, but I ignored it as I glared at the one reporter gawking at Bo's chest. I folded my arms over my chest, watching as Bo opened the door, letting in a younger man that looked awfully familiar, and an older man. I took a step, when it hit me. The younger man was Will Kent, Bo's co-star on World's Unknown. He played her best friend on the show, and I was a huge fan of his. I'd met him at a convention before I first met Bo, and he was beyond kind and grateful to his fans. I grinned and walked over to the two men. Bo turned, her voice breaking as she took my hand again, and introduced us. "Lauren, this is my friend, best friend, Will Kent."

I took his hand, shaking it like the silly fangirl I was. "I know you. I mean, I know who you are. I met you a long time ago at a convention. I still have your autograph in one of my script notebooks."

I blushed when Will chuckled, shaking his head, letting go of my firm death grip on his hand. "I should be the one gushing over you, Lauren Lewis. You're an incredible director, screenwriter, and everything else. I truly am a fan, and I'm not saying that because you've locked down my best friend's heart." Will smiled as Bo tipped her head down. Will directed me to the older man next to him, "Lauren, I'd like to introduce you to my father. Reverend William Kent, Sr."

I eagerly took the older man's hand. "Nice to meet you, sir." I glanced at Bo. "I'm sorry Bo hasn't mentioned much about her friends from the show. I've kept her busy on the film, and her star is taking off again."

The reverend laughed, patting me on the shoulder. "Ysabeau here, has told us all about you, Lauren. How she met you, how you two fought, then fell in love, and what the future holds. It's a very heartwarming story, one I fell in love with when my son asked if I could do you two a favor."

I looked at Bo, watching her face turn a bright red. "A favor?" I looked at Will and his father, completely confused. "Movie tickets? Tickets to the premiere? A set visit? A nice dinner?"

The reverend laughed again, reaching into his pocket to remove a small notebook. He waved his hand at his son, "Please tell the girls to come in, we do need witnesses to this event."

I turned to Bo. "Bo, what's he talking about? What event?" I felt my palms sweat as the slow realization started sinking in. "Bo…"

"Oh Lauren, you're a bit dim times." Gillian's voice pulled my attention to the door. She held up a small bouquet of flowers that looked like she stole them from the lobby. Effy was close behind, holding a bottle of champagne and a tray of glasses. "Welcome to your wedding day." She stepped next to me, linking her arm in mine as she handed the flowers to Bo. "I'm your best man, ring boy." She dug in her pocket, removing a small blue box and handed it to the reverend. She waved at Will who went to stand next to Bo. "And Will is her best man."

I went to step away out of shocked confusion, "Wedding day?" I was panicking, and Gillian felt. She tightened her hold on my arm as the reverend moved to stand in front of us. "Bo?" Effy rushed forth, setting a glass with two fingers of whiskey in it. I clutched to the glass as I looked to Bo for help, or answers.

Bo looked at me, scared. "Lauren, I called Will the other night. Asked if he could come up with his dad and marry us. I have no time off in the near future, and you'll be busy until the premiere. I didn't want to wait any longer. It's spontaneous, crazy, and I can call it off. But I hated the thought of spending one more night with you and not have you be my wife. I love you so much, Lauren…." She trailed off, looking at everyone in the room for help.

I stuttered until Gillian pinched me, whispering in my ear to shut my brain down and let my heart speak. I took a deep breath, and turned to the reverend. "Is this legal?"

He laughed, nodding his head. "It is. Not only am I a reverend, but a lawyer. I have your marriage license in my pocket to be signed the second I pronounce you. Will and I took care of everything this morning. If you want to go through with this, you'll be legally married in less than ten minutes." He gave me a reassuring look. "That girl loves you, you love that girl. I saw it the moment I walked into this door. There's nothing to be afraid of, you've already done the hard part."

I let out a slow breath, closing my eyes. "I'm going to kill all of you for colluding behind my back." I opened my eyes, blinking back tears as I looked over at Bo. "Let's get married." I slammed the whiskey back, cringing at the burn rolling down my throat. I didn't need the liquid courage to marry Bo, I just needed to relax so I could focus on marrying Bo and not panicking at the fact we were getting married in a hotel room. A surprise indeed.

Bo's face broke out into a massive grin, her own eyes welling up as she shifted to stand next to me. I reached down, linking my fingers in hers. The reverend started the speech, guiding us word by word to the path of matrimony. I barely heard most of what he said, too busy staring at Bo and how beautiful she looked. Holding a stolen bouquet, grinning like a lottery winner. Gillian had to pinch me when the reverend asked if I would take Bo forever, in sickness and health, richer or poorer, till death did we part. I grinned, feeling my heart skip a few beats. "God yes, I do. Until the end of time, and a thousand more years past that."

Bo started crying softly, tears rolling down her cheeks as she gave me the rest of her life. To be mine and mine alone. We slipped the simple platinium bands Gillian had picked out, telling us she had them inscribed with tiny bananas that would leave an imprint on our skin. Before I could curse her, the reverend pronounced us to be married, and I had free reign to kiss my wife.

And I did. I grabbed Bo like it was the first time again, and kissed her with my soul. She leaned into the kiss, and when Effy catcalled us to knock it off or get a room, I broke the kiss. Bo held my face with her hands, the cool feeling of her rings against my skin, and whispered, "You're my wife, Lauren. _My_ wife." I could feel the weight in her words. After everything we'd been through, hearing her finality that I was hers, gave me life.

"I love you, Ysabeau Lewis." I smirked as she gave me a look. "You can keep your stage name."

She stepped back as Effy told us we only had five more minutes before the next round of interviews. "You mean you can keep your stage name, Lauren Dennis." She brought my hand up, kissing the rings on my left finger.

I laughed, "We'll negotiate name changes later, let's go sign the license." I kissed her once more, guiding her over to Will, Gillian, Effy and the reverend. All of them congratulated us, even Gillian wiped a few tears away and slapped my back. "Well done. You've finally grown into a real girl now, Lauren."

I nudged her, letting go of Bo to talk to Will about meeting us for dinner later. I pointed at Effy. "I give you three months until you're calling me to help you write a proposal for the love of your life."

Gillian rolled her eyes, nudging me back. "Pffftt…three months? I'll barely last past the end of this month. I'm stupidly in love with Lizbet and watching the impossible happen with you, makes me want to be romantic and married." She winked at me, walking away. "Maybe we've all grown into real girls, Lauren, and we have you and your hopeless romantic heart to thank." She winked, walked over to say her goodbyes to Will and his dad.

I sighed happily, lifting the ring on my finger up and catching the tiny imprint of a banana forming on my skin. I laughed, this was my life. I was just shotgunned married in a hotel room while on a press junket, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I pushed the ring down against my engagement ring, grinning. If anyone would've told me this is where I would be seven months ago, I would have laughed in their face, told them to piss off and save it for the movies.

But as I walked towards my wife, I knew I was living a life better than anything I could write.


	29. Chapter 29

**N: this is a short one, i broke up the epilogue from this chapter since it needed to stand alone. Last minute change, but it happens. I think this is the end for these girls and i'm sending them off into the world happy and full of love. I fear if i kept going, i'd doing something angsty to them. I aplogize for taking so long, work has been crazy and i've been trying to get things done in my other life. I also rewrote this a few times because i couldn't find a way out that wasn't even shorter or angst free. Anyways, read on and go follow me over at my brand new blog. sydneygibsonsite . wordpress. com (take the spaces out, ff won't let me post websites) I might be posting a sample chapter of the new book there this weekend!**

* * *

Bo

I snuck out of the hotel room with success. Lauren was still in bed, asleep and curled up in my pillow. I was too wired to stay in bed with my wife the moment the sun rose. I smiled as I slipped the room key in my pocket. My wife. Lauren was my wife. I was married to the love of my life, and erasing the past every minute I wore her wedding ring. I grinned, entering the empty elevator. There was a continental breakfast calling my name, and I wanted to run to the mall next to the hotel, and find Lauren a wedding gift.

Staring up at the fancy floor counter, I drifted to my upcoming schedule. I had one more day in Los Angeles, then it was off to the studio offices to go over the rest of my shooting schedule in Venice. There were a few new film offers on the table, my future was about to be jammed packed with filming if I took on another movie. I scrunched my face up, debating if I really wanted to stay in this business, or fade into the background and live a quiet life with Lauren.

The elevator dinged open, and I was greeted with a grinning Effy. She was fully dressed and ready for action. "Hey there Bo." She slid into the elevator next to me, a thick envelope tucked under her arm. "I was about to come up to your floor and see if you and the missus were awake." She pressed the lobby button.

I shrugged. "I couldn't sleep, figured I would raid the continental breakfast. Lauren is still in the room, but I don't think it'd be a good idea to wake her up." I felt my cheeks heat up, "We had a long night after dinner."

Effy chuckled, "I bet. The wedding night is always one for the books." She let out a sigh, "I have no intentions of waking Lauren up. She's very much like Gilly when it comes to mornings. I can't fathom how beautiful, graceful, intelligent women, become primal animals when you want to get them up and have a few pancakes." She cocked her head my way. "Gillian scowled at me when my shower was too loud, such a diva."

I giggled, nodding in agreement. "Lauren once complained I rolled in the bed too loudly." I shook my head, "If we didn't love them as much as we did…"

"I'd arrest her and send her to the bowels of England's finest prison." Effy winked at me as the elevator stopped in the lobby. "After you, Bo."

"Thank you." I zipped up the hoodie I wore, and jammed my left hand deep in the pocket. Lauren and I had agreed to do our best in keeping the wedding a secret for as long as possible. My rings weren't extravagant in the least, but a keen eye would pick up the finger they were on. "Would you care to join me for a few pancakes, and maybe go next door to help me find Lauren a cheesy wedding gift?"

"Of course, but I must give you Lauren's wedding gift to you." She held out the thick envelope. This came by courier first thing." Effy led us into the small restaurant and towards the far back. "Oh I smell French toast."

I smiled, peeling open the envelope. "I hope this isn't a prenup, I think we're past the point of making one of these valid, and I would never take a dime of Lauren's if we…" I drifted off, I didn't want to ever think about Lauren and I not together. "Sorry, bad habit of a bad first marriage."

Effy sat down, waving for me to sit across from her as she flagged a waitress down. "No worries, Bo. I understand, some scars will always leave a scar, no matter how much you've healed." She pointed at the envelope, "But you'll see this is no prenup, just an adorably romantic gesture by Lauren."

I gave Effy a confused look before dumping out the contents. A brand-new license, passport, and a few other things fell onto of the table. Picking up the license, I saw it was Laurens, but her last name was Dennis, not Lewis. I felt my eyes grow to the size of dinner plates as I glanced at Effy. "Effy, what are these?"

She grinned, "They are all of Lauren's proper identifications, and whatnot, changed to reflect that she is married." She reached over and handed me the paperwork. "I pulled a few more favors and had everything done while we were at dinner. Lauren's official last name is Dennis. She will still use the stage name of Lewis to keep a bit of privacy, but she took your name. She felt it was the best thing to do, give you all of herself and wash away the past on both of your parts."

I looked back down at everything in front of me, Lauren had even gone so far to change her will, and her estate holdings to include me. I was one hundred percent her wife in name and life. "Holy shit…" I set the license down, a rush of panic hitting my chest. "But what if? What if she changes her mind? I don't want her to think she had to do this. I love Lauren for Lauren, not for her fame, money, or houses." I bit my bottom lip in nerves.

"She won't. I asked her the same thing, well sort of same thing, and she told me that she could care less what the world thought, she loves you and knows you are her forever. She wanted to secure a few things before the spotlight tumbles down on you two, that you're in this together. Forever." Effy patted my hand, "Money means very little to Lauren, it's a burden of life these days, nothing more. She told me that all she needed in this world was a notebook and you by her side, the rest was a bonus."

I sniffled, my eyes watering. "No one has ever given me this much. This much love, this much of themselves, and not asked for anything in return aside from my heart." I glanced up at Effy, "What did I do to deserve this woman?" I put everything back in the envelope and handed it over to Effy to tuck in her bag.

Effy winked at me as the waitress directed us to indulge in the French toast buffet. "You never gave up, and you fought like hell. You of all people deserve that woman and the love you share." She stood up, grabbing my hand, "Come love, forgo the tears and let's tear into some French toast like it's the Queen's last day on the throne."

I laughed, standing up to follow the hungry girl, "What is it with your obsession with the queen?"

Effy cocked an eyebrow, "Live in England a few more years and you'll see the glory that woman is enshrined in."

"Whatever you say Effy, you've not steered me wrong yet."

* * *

XXXXX

Lauren

Academy Award night

I hated award shows, and I hated when I won. Yes, I knew it was egotistical of me to say that to anyone, but the truth was standing up on the stage accepting an award in front of basically the world, scared me. I wasn't good at these things, I was the shy girl who never thought I did anything worth watching, let alone winning an Oscar for. But here I was, walking up the stage to accept one for best director, my hands sweating like they were faucets.

I held up the long skirt of my red dress and looked back at Bo, clapping and crying as her own Oscar sat on the floor in front of her. I grinned, and turned back to walk up the stage. This entire night had been a whirlwind of everything. Blitzkrieg swept the awards, taking everything it was nominated for. Bo won over Gillian, and the red head clapped louder, hooted and hollered, then anyone polite person should at such an award show. But I saw why Gillian did it, Bo had done an amazing job and deserved all of the honors that were falling her way. I sat watching her tearfully thank everyone, and stumble over her words until she gave up and cried happy tears. When she sat back down next to me, she whispered in my ear an apology for not thanking me as her wife. I told her it was okay, the world still didn't know Bo and I had been married for going on four months now.

Four incredibly amazing and frustrating months. The week after we were married, Bo and I went our separate ways for our jobs. She went back to Venice to complete filming, and I was swallowed up in the press meetings, the post production, and getting the film marketing set for the public release. She would call me every night, asking to speak to Mrs. Dennis, a tone of pure joy in her voice each time she said it. We would talk for hours until one of fell asleep on the phone, and before long, I couldn't handle it and flew out to Venice to be with her. I could do everything remotely, and I honestly didn't care if Blitzkrieg made a damn dollar at the box office. I wanted to be my wife. I didn't have that luck. The first weekend Blizkrieg was released it set box office records, and never stopped. It became huge success and was on the fast track to becoming a new modern classic that everyone who wants to fall in love, will watch as a guide for life. At least that's what the reviews said, I was just happy people liked the movie and accepting the story of two women falling in love.

Luckily for us, another scandal broke in Hollywood a day after we were married, so no one paid us any attention. A few pictures here and there while at the airport, or out at dinner, and there was the usual speculation we were dating. I was okay with it, it gave Bo and I a bit of normalcy to have our first few months of marriage in. Then as we got closer to the Oscars, the rumors began to leak, pictures of our hands were blown up with circles around the rings. The press was pushing harder now that there was nothing but who was going to wear what designer. I knew the only way was to push through and do it in a grand way. So, Gillian and I hatched a plan, more like I agreed to a bet, and now here I was, having to pay up on my end.

"Congratulations, Lauren! This movie was incredible."

I grinned at Steven Spielberg handing me my award with a pat on the back. I whispered out a thank you and walked to the microphone. I took a deep breath, and looked around the audience until I found Bo's big brown eyes. I nodded at her and started my speech. "Um, I didn't think I'd be up here tonight, accepting this award when there are far better directors nominated." I shifted the heavy statue in my hands. "But thank you, thank you all for falling in love with this movie, and making it a bigger success than any of us could have imagined. I took another breath. "There's three people I have to thank for making this movie possible. My grandma and grandpa who lived this love story I borrowed, I won't bore you with the story since I know most of you've read it in my interviews over the last few months. They are my forever inspiration and I know they're smiling down on me." I looked up to find Gillian winking at me and urging me to continue. I shook my head and looked up at the ceiling, before catching Bo's eyes again. "Lastly, there's one person who added the heart to the film, the person who brought my heart back to life, and made me realize a love like my grandparents could be found." I licked my lips and waved towards Bo. "To my wife, Bo Dennis. Thank you. Thank you for loving me when it was impossible, guiding me back to a heart that I thought was dead, and letting me stand by your side for the rest of our lives. I'm so glad I married you." I held up the statue as the audience began to clap and give me a standing ovation. "Love is real, I hope everyone finds what I have." I nodded and instead of walking backstage with George, I walked down the steps and straight towards Bo. The auditorium was booming with hoots, hollers, and applause. I walked right up to her, wiped away the tears on her cheeks and kissed her, before leaning against her ear and whispering, "I lost a bet, and I no longer care if the world knows you're my wife. I love you, Mrs. Dennis."

Bo blew out a laugh, crying more as she wrapped her arms around me. "I love you, Mrs. Dennis."

She buried her face in my neck as I held her closer. "And if anyone wants to bother you, they'll have to go through me first."

"And me!" Gillian slapped both of our backs, tears running down her own cheeks. "Who knew winning a bet would be so bloody romantic!" She hugged Bo and I as the audience continued to clap. I knew we would be on the front-page tomorrow, a tiny blurb under the main headline of the best actor winner stripping off all his clothes and screaming "fuck the patriarchy" on live television.

I looked around the room and only saw grins of support, tears of other hopeless romantics cheering me on. And as I moved out of Bo's arms, I saw in her eyes the fear was gone, replaced by the strength of our unbreakable love. I smiled, kissing her once more as the MC called the room to order, and sat down next to her. This was the end of so much in my life, but the beginning of the rest of my life, and I was ready to face all of it with Bo by my side.

The end


End file.
